Chapter Twenty.

Miley.

To the world it was just another day in the year, to New York City it was day in which everyone stopped and remembered, to me it was day I'd rather just forget ever happened.

The routine that occurred on September 11 was exactly the same every year for me. I didn't move from my bed, I didn't eat and I didn't speak unless I had too. I spent the day alone, thinking of them without curious eyes analyzing my state of mind instead staring out the bedroom window watching the world go by outside without my parents or me in it. It was the longest twenty-four hours of my life and every single year I dreaded having to wake up to 9/11 because every year it felt like the first. It was the routine I lived by, it never altered and yet this year Nick and my stupid Uncle wanted to change it.

"I don't want to go Nick." I murmured holding the snow globe in my fingers,

"We're going, get up."

"No."

"You get up or I'll kick your sorry ass out of that bed." He yelled at me.

"No!"

"Miley come on, you made a deal with Jason."

"No I didn't! I never gave him an answer! I'll pay for the stupid car, I'm not going!"

"Miley stop doing this you need to get up and face reality."

It took all my strength to not just burst into tears as I shook the globe staring at him shaking my head. "I'm not going to the memorial, I'm not, and there is nothing you can say to make me go Nick!" I threw myself down pulling the blanket over my head as he sighed,

"Miley please come with me to the memorial,"

"No."

"Why not?"

The question was simple and it's not like I hadn't been faced by it before. 9/11 was the one-day I could go to the World Trade Centre memorial and not feel so isolated as everyone who stood around me lost loved ones too. I liked being with my parents alone though, that was the thing that really hindered me going. I wanted to be able to have space with them, so I could be entirely with my mom and dad and not with everyone else.

"Miley," Nick murmured sitting on the bed, "It's time for a change."

I listened touching the glass staring at the twin towers in the snow globe, "I said I'd help you remember? I'm going to the memorial today so I can meet your parents, you either come with me or you don't, I'm going regardless Miley."

"Meet my parents?" I repeated.

"Yes we haven't been introduced yet and I think they'd want to meet me. I am their only daughters boyfriend after all."

"It's not like they can stop you being my boyfriend, they're dead Nick."

"This coming from the girl who won't let go," He stated seriously,

I closed my mouth as he huffed, "Fine have it your way! I'll see you at work tomorrow bright and early." He proclaimed,

Nick stood up as I bit my lip knowing exactly what he was doing and as much as I hated to admit it, it was working. He wanted to change my routine. He wanted me to change. Was that such a bad thing? I mean it's not like I'd ever tried something else, I guess I didn't even know what going to the memorial would feel like. Maybe my assumptions would be wrong? Maybe this would be a good idea?

"Miley please." Nick begged.

I watched the small flicks of white spinning and swirling around in the snow globe, somewhat representing the emotions I was currently feeling. I wanted to change though, I did, but this was hard for me. Too hard.

"I promise I'll be with you no matter what."

I didn't respond as he sighed, "Fine, I tried, I love you Miley. I'll see you tomorrow." He announced walking out of my room.

I winced internally knowing I couldn't let him leave. I wanted him here, with me. He had other plans though, plans I didn't want to involve myself in but what choice did I have? I wanted him to be with me.

I pushed the sheets down sighing, "Nick- wait I'll go okay?"

I heard him stop walking as I sighed, "If you want me to go then I suppose I can make a change for you…"

His footsteps returned to the room as I looked up to see my boyfriend leaning on the doorframe staring at me, "I don't want you backing out Miley. The second we leave this apartment we aren't turning back, not matter what? Understand? We are going to do this together."

I nodded feeling sick. "I get it okay, just…let me get ready?"

His eyes watched me for a moment then he nodded, "Okay you've got twenty minutes," Nick announced as he just looked at me giving a small smile, "I love you Miley."

"I love you too," I grumbled climbing out of bed.

Getting ready was easier than I expected. I'd thought it would be harder, yet it was just like any other morning. I tied my hair back looking at myself in the mirror as I felt my confidence build a little bit. I looked okay. I felt okay. I would be okay. I had to be, for them. For myself.

"You ready?" Nick called out.

I nodded to myself and glanced one last time at my snow globe deciding I wanted to bring it with me. That way I'd still have my perfect world with me, even if I couldn't see it in reality, it would always be with me. I grabbed my bag and put the snow globe in walking out. Nick glanced at me giving a cheerful smile walking over,

"You look beautiful, as always."

I just stared at him not feeling myself wanting to respond. He nodded and reached out offering his hand as I let my eyes fall staring at it, "Miley please do this, not just for me, but for yourself, for your parents." He repeated trying to indent it into my brain.

I bit my lip and closed my eyes reaching out taking his hand.

I didn't let go the entire trip downtown.

I never wanted to let go.

"You're doing so great," Nick whispered in my ear as we reached the entrance to the site. He was lying. I was a wreck.

The second I started to see people I'd felt the confidence disappear and I'd tried to turn around but Nick hadn't let go. The emotions were controlling everything in me, and all they wanted to do was run. Run away from all of this pain and just stay where it was safe. Nick held me in his arms so tightly that fleeing wasn't an option though.

He forced me to move and he dragged me forward until we were there. Standing at the site where my parents died.

I felt sick.

There were people everywhere.

Flowers in hand.

Flags flying.

I wanted to go home.

I turned around hoping to break free as Nick grabbed me this time almost painfully, holding me in his grasp, "Miley," He whispered in my ear, "You can do this. I know you can do this! You come here all the time and today is no different okay? These people are here to pay their respects, we are going to pay our respects Miley."

"I don't want too," I whispered.

"Yes you do, you do." He begged, "Please Miley. Please."

I shook my head, "I can't Nick, I can't be here, they died here, I-"

"You can, you already are. Just calm down."

"I want to go home." I spat frustrated.

"Stop acting like a two year old!" Nick spat glaring down at me clearly frustrated, "Look this isn't just about you- this is for me too. Not only do I get to meet your parents, but I'm able to mourn my dad and I'm not having you take that from me. I want you here with me Miley, but you need to stop acting like this okay? You aren't the only one hurting here- all of these people are too."

Nick held his hands out letting go of me for the first time, motioning to those around us. I slowly turned around feeling naked without his hands on me, my eyes slowly filling with the scene before me. After a few seconds of just standing there alone I started to recognize the groupings of people around me. There were the ones like Nick who were holding others, supporting them the best they could even though words would not heal what had happened here. Then there the people who were being comforted, they were all tearful, pale faced and ranged from children to most likely grandparents of the deceased. Finally there were people like me, who just stood like they were lost with no direction. They looked as dead as the ones they were mourning.

I didn't want to be like that anymore. I wanted to be alive and happy with the world I was in.

"So where are their names?" Nick asked me.

It took a moment to process what he was saying, I heard it but I just kept staring at everyone seemingly frozen. Nick gently wrapped his arm around my shoulders his face moving in front of mine,

"Miley which way?" He repeated blocking everyone else out.

"Left," My lips whispered after a moment.

He nodded and guided me away, and suddenly we both had a direction. I followed the normal route I took, knowing ever crack in the pavement by heart. It felt just like normal, but there were a lot more feet to contend with now as I kept my eyes down.

"Now which way?" Nick asked.

"Left," I said again,

I looked up at him this time as he smiled at me and kissed the side of my head, "You're doing great okay…" I nodded and looked down again as we kept moving. I took the final last few steps in a hurry and stopped. To no surprise there were no more shoes to stare at in front of me but rather an absent space that had never been filled on this day before.

"Look," Nick whispered, "We made it. You did it."

I didn't respond and kept my eyes down as Nick sighed.

"Miley you did a good job, they'd be proud of you today."

"No they wouldn't," I responded quietly, "They'd be mad."

"Mad?" Nick asked confused, "Why would you think that?"

"Because…"

"Because why?"

"Because it took me this long to come here today."

I bit down on my tongue refusing to let myself cry because I'd decided I didn't want to be in any of those groups. I didn't want to feel dead, I didn't want to cry, I didn't want to comfort anyone. I just wanted to be okay with this, and I wasn't.

Nick sighed squeezing me tightly against his body, "Miley they'd be so proud of you right now, time doesn't mean a thing because they know how much you've struggled okay? This is big, so big for you, and they'd be so unbelievable proud that you've finally done this I'm sure."

"How can you be sure Nick? You never knew them." I snapped back at him.

Nick's arm detached from my shoulders only for his fingers a moment later to move under my chin. He eased my head from the ground, gently bringing his eyes to mine. "You're right I didn't, but I know I love you just as much as they did and that means that if I'm proud of you right now, they must be too."

I closed my eyes and nodded looking away from him towards the waterfall, it's sound temporarily filling my ears reducing everything else to just a whisper. I finally let my eyes open again as I looked at the names, no different to when I'd last seen them. They were still there, still the same, nothing had changed. Nothing would ever change and I hated that. I hated it so damn much.

My lip started quivering and I swallowed the lump in my throat. I reached out touching the cold slate with my fingers, not tracing the letters but spreading my palm across both names.

"I love you." I whispered. "More than anything in this world."

I said it to the names but I turned looking towards Nick, the words I was saying not only directed to my parents but specifically to him. "You mean everything to me, and I don't know what I'd do without you." I stared up at him as he smiled at me leaning down.

"You'll never be without me okay?" Nick whispered.

He looked back and moved his hand out covering mine as I tried to smile but instead I started crying. Nick didn't hug me, he let me come to him when I was ready and as I did Nick let his arms wrap around me.

"You promise?" I chocked out.

He squeezed me tight nodding, "I promise, I won't leave."

I nodded too as he entwined our fingers, "You're okay Miley, you're perfect okay?"

He tried to reassure me, like so many times before but everyday I spent with him I was beginning to realize. "No," I responded into his chest, "No I'm not, but I'm trying to be, I'm trying to be okay." I murmured as his hug only tightened.

"Then I think it's time we make that change," Nick whispered.

Nick.

There comes a day in everyone's life when you have to face the inevitable, that death is an essential part of life. That the one's you love, the people you hate, will all have the same fate whether it be tomorrow or in fifty years. No one can live forever.

To face that reality was hard, and something I struggled often to comprehend, because one day I'd be nothing more than memories left in the minds of a chosen few. That's the thing though you're never truly dead because the things you do in life they become immortal for those who follow. You're only dead if you are forgotten, something that my father and Miley's parents never would be. They'd remain with us forever, but first we had to accept that they were gone. I'd done that already, but Miley admitted to me even though she hadn't entirely let go she was trying too. I'd decided that was enough for me to take the next step,

"Why are we here Nick?" She whispered,

I held Miley's hand tightly clasped in mine as we stood at her Uncle and Aunt's front door. I raised my fist knocking slowly, as I noted my slightly shaking hand. I let it drop quickly, not wanting my fear to radiate. I didn't want her to be scared, not yet, because the trauma we were about to put her through would be enough to evoke fear and so many other emotions she'd withheld for so long.

I turned to look at Miley seeing the confusion in her bright eyes. I didn't want to do this to her, especially not today, but I knew it would help in the long term even if it destroyed her now.

"I thought you said today was just about us, you and me, not them?"

I looked at Miley and gave her the bravest smile I could manage,

"You know I want to help you right?" I asked,

Miley nodded, "And you are Nick, I mean you're the first person I've told everything too." She murmured staring down at our hands, "You're the only person in this world I truly trust."

Miley looked back to me as I bit my tongue trying to hold the strength within me,

"And that's why we're here…"

"I don't understand."

"You need to be brave Miley," I stated staring at her, "Be brave for me okay?"

She went to open her mouth confusion swarming her eyes just as the door opened. We both turned and looked at Jason who stood there, he stared at me for a moment as I nodded,

"It's time," I stated simply.

"Time for what?" Miley asked frustrated.

Miley looked at me innocently, as Jason looked directly at me,

"Are you sure?"

I nodded at him, "She needs to hear it Jason…."

"Hear what?"

Jason moved aside as Miley looked between us and I put my hand gently on the base of her back. She moved into the apartment without me even pushing still staring at her Uncle for an explanation,

"What's going on Jase?"

"Hey honey," Amy's voice announced,

Jason shut the door as Amy walked over to Miley who was standing there looking at her Aunt completely bewildered. Amy moved up placing her hand gently on Miley's cheek giving a small relieved sigh, "This is the first time on 9/11 I haven't seen your eyes blood shot and puffy, it's nice," She murmured letting her hand drop "The memorial was…"

"Good," Miley whispered, "It was nice not being the only one feeling lost still."

"You're not lost," Amy whispered staring into Miley's eyes, "You're stuck…"

Miley just stood there unsure of how to respond as I moved up beside her looking at Amy. "I think it's time…" I announced as Amy's eyes widened a little, the smile disappearing from her face, "I think she's ready,"

"Will someone please tell me what is going on?" Miley hissed.

"Miley…"

I stopped as Jason stepped forward, "Hun come sit down,"

Miley looked between the three of us as I saw the ignition of the fear, it was in her eyes now and although she nodded calmly following her aunt to the sofa I still stood wondering if this was the right thing to do. It took a moment but the conclusion was always the same, it wasn't the right thing but it had to be done because Miley would never truly be happy unless she moved on, and to move on she needed to know that her parents were dead and that they were never coming home to her.

I moved and sat beside her as she turned to me, "Nick what's going on?"

"Miley you know how they didn't find your parents?" I asked,

Her head instantly nodded, "And that they never found anything?" She nodded again staring at me, "You told me that even though you knew they were dead a part of you hopes and hangs onto the fact that there was nothing found for you to mourn over." Miley face started to shallow as her head didn't move this time, "And that you would never have closure because you never buried them."

"Nick-"

"Miley we can give you that closure." Jason whispered.

Her head snapped to Jason who closed his eyes, "That day, so much happened so quickly and I know if we could go back you, me, the world, we'd change so much if we could."

"What do you mean you can give me closure?" Miley snapped,

I moved my hand over taking Miley's again as Jason sighed looking at his phone.

"Your dad called me Miley, from the South tower."

"What?" Miley whispered leaning forward, "What do you mean?"

"I didn't answer it Miley, I was busy eating of all things," I watched the Commissioner's eyes suddenly fill with tears, "To do this day I will not forgive myself, because I saw his number come up on my cell and I ignored it so I could eat one last mouthful."

Miley closed her eyes for a moment and reopened them a second later,

"Why didn't you tell me this?" She asked simply.

"He called me at 9.58am Miley,"

Miley's face instantly filled with confusion, "But that was right before it fell? The South tower fell at 9.59, I remember." She asked innocently as I sucked in a breath waiting for her to realise, yet her expression stayed the same.

Jason sighed and reached his hands out to her, "Everything got so out of control so quickly, I got called in to work, I forgot that he'd called me. It wasn't until the afternoon when I noticed I hadn't heard from your mom or your dad that I noticed he'd left a voice message." Jason explained calmly,

"He left you a message?" She murmured, "From the tower?"

"It went for exactly thirty two seconds, and stopped at 9.59am."

Miley just stared at him for a moment, her brain trying to comprehend what he was saying as I felt her hand start shaking in mine. I instantly grasped it tighter as she swallowed opening her mouth for a moment only to close it. The question was there in her eyes, but little Destiny didn't want to ask it, even if Miley did.

Jason sighed and leaned forward putting his hand gently on her knee closing his eyes. Jason opened his lips and then looked at his niece knowing that there would never be an easy way to say it,

"You can hear the building collapse in the message, you can hear your mom scream."

A single tear slipped down the Commissioner's face as I couldn't help but look down. For a second I didn't want to see Miley's expression because the second I did I knew I'd feel the pain too. Eventually I stole a glance to find Miley looking at her Uncle blankly,

"I want to hear it." She suddenly proclaimed.

"Sweet heart," Amy whispered wrapping her arm around Miley, "You don't have to listen to it, we can just tell you what they said-"

"No." Miley spat a flourish of determination in her eyes,

"Miley you don't-"

"I want to hear it," She spat staring directly at Jason, "I need to hear it."

He looked at her for a moment longer before finally nodding,

"Okay,"

He picked up his phone as Miley turned looking at me, I knew maybe a part of her was mad that I hadn't said anything earlier but right now I was sure her mind was so clouded with other emotions her pain towards me was dulled. I moved my hand to her shoulder, tracing my fingers along her pale skin,

"I'm right here, we're all right here to help you okay?" I whispered.

Miley looked at me and slowly nodded, "I know,"

"Okay it's about to play are you-"

"Put it on loudspeaker." Miley ordered.

Jason nodded and pressed a button placing it on the table. I felt sick waiting, as I clutched Miley's trembling hand watching her expression instead of the phone,

"Message received September 11 2001…"

"Jason it's Billy" A young panicked male voice yelled as Miley instantly tensed "Look I don't know if you're seen it, or you're at work yet, but two planes have hit the twin towers." His hesitation allowed the sound of screams to fill our ears as Miley's eyes instantly widened, "It's crazy here Jason, we're as high as we can get, Tish and me we're with the NYFD trying to communicate back to ground. We're trying to get these people out but…I just don't know Jase, I don't know what's going to happen. Look when you get this please just drop everything and do one thing for me…"

I watched as Miley leaned closer her eyes staring at the phone,

"You gotta get smiley Jase, she's at school and I don't know if she's safe there or anywhere at the moment, but I want you to get her. Please take her away from seeing this, she'll panic, you know how she gets when Des is scared. Jus tell her we love her okay? That's she gonna be okay, that we love her so so much."

I heard a sob escape Amy's lips as she covered her mouth trying to hide it, while Miley watched the phone intently.

"I love you Jase, please look after her if we don't get out-"

"BILLY-"

In that last second we heard so much. Billy's plea to his brother to protect his only child, Tish screaming for husband as the thundering sound above came down and then there was static. The building had fallen. They were both dead.

"End of Message."

It was silent for a moment as Miley's face remained blank,

"Miley, honey…" Jason started, "I'm so sorry."

Her eyes just stared at the phone her breathing in the same unchanged pattern while Miley's eyes remained unmoving. It was like she was gone from this Earth. Then without any warning, she stood up and walked very calmly and sedately away from the three of us. I went to stand up as Amy's arm moved out and I stared at her confused,

"Don't," She whispered, "She needs to be alone Nick."

So we sat there. I don't know how long we just sat in complete silence, none of us able or willing to say anything because there was nothing we could do to make this better. They were dead, they always had been and they died being heroes yet that meant nothing to Miley. All she'd wanted was them, and instead she'd finally had the conclusion to their life played to her, killing the last hope she'd had left. It was that hope that we had to break though, because she needed to move on and as much as it hurt now one day I just knew we would look back and call this the turning point in changing Miley's life.

The smash took us by surprise when it shattered the silence.

The scream that followed had all three of us on our feet rushing for her bedroom in a frenzy. Jason reached the room first throwing open the door with no hesitation, only to stop as we all gazed down,

The snow globe lay scattered across the floor, millions of tiny pieces of glass and white snow slowly spreading across the ground from ground zero. Miley sat screaming at the main broken base, the buildings all broken and destroyed. At that moment my heart broke for her because I knew we'd just destroyed little Destiny's perfect world, the city Miley had been trying so hard to say in.

A/N: I did warn all you guys the sad chapter was coming! Hopefully you enjoyed it, even though enjoying this chapter is pretty hard to say the least. It's only up from here...until the finale where of course more drama will go down. Thanks for all the support guys, you are all amazing! And to those who care yes I'm working on Hurricane and I will update/finish it eventually!