A/N: Wow, I didn't think it'd reach 8 reviews for a minute there but it did, and I thank you for that. As promised, this is the last chapter of Tabula Rasa. It's been really fun to write, and I hope you guys have enjoyed reading it as much as I have had writing it. It's going to suck to put it away, but I have decided to switch fronts on my next story, so it's not all bad news. In light of the amount of speculative S6 fics I'm going to focus my attention on another Jate AU. But more on that in a minute.
I'd like to thank every single one of you who reviewed, especially those of who you reviewed every chapter. I know who you are, I just don't want to write the list out here for fear of missing someone off of it :D. I ask you to continue reviewing my stories even if you hate them (I can take it...honest :D), but hey if you like them that's even better. This chapter is the longest I've ever written, weighing in at close to 5,000 words so I hope it gives you a fill to hold you over til my next fic starts. I'm going to stop rambling now and let you read it, hopefully I'm not bigging it up for a let down but we'll see. Enjoy!
PS. I'm not exactly sure how some of the...events... actually occur so I tried my best. I hope they're not to unrealistic.
Chapter 20: The Shephards
"Jack, where are we going?" Kate asked as exited Los Angeles city limits.
"Oh, I think you'll recognize it." Jack replied cryptically.
"That really narrows it down, Jack." Kate replied in frustration. She felt mixed emotion whenever Jack entered his 'mysterious romantic' persona. He was incredibly cute when he watched her try and figure out what he had planned for her, and that was exactly what she hated. She hated not knowing, she hated that Jack had the upper hand, and no matter how much she tried he never ruined the surprise.
"Well, you know I don't like to ruin my surprises. It's not much farther now, don't worry."
Kate pouted in one final attempt to learn of Jack's plans for the night, but when she was rebuffed by a triumphantly smiling Jack, settled for leaning on the window and watching the beautiful California sunset.
"Kate." Jack whispered a short while later, startling Kate awake.
"What happened?" Kate asked immediately, realizing they were still in Jack's car.
"You fell asleep looking out the window. You looked so peaceful I didn't really want to wake you." Jack explained. Kate smiled at Jack's consideration, and kissed him on the cheek.
They both quickly exited the car and Kate took in her surroundings. They'd driven to the beach; the same beach which, somewhere down the shore, contained the inlet in which they'd shared their 'first date'.
"Figure out where we are yet?" Jack said, ending her memory.
"Yea, are we going to the same place?" Kate asked.
"Only, if you want to." Jack replied, mentally checking he had everything ready. Cell phone- off. Wallet- check. Keys- check. Pocket- set. Jack placed his arm around Kate's waist and they walked quietly toward their very own inlet.
They reached the path upward into the cliff face after what seemed like an eternity, and Jack's nerves were beginning to get the best of him. He'd dreamed of this night for a long time, and after all these years he'd finally found the one woman he truly wanted to spend the rest of his life with.
He was brought back down to Earth to the feel of Kate tugging at his hand, leading him up the path. "We're going up right? I still owe you a push off of the ledge." Kate joked, causing Jack to smile, but shake his head.
"I was thinking we could stay down here tonight. Maybe we could just enjoy the sunset and the ocean." Jack supplied nervously, hoping Kate wouldn't notice.
"OK." Kate agreed as she sat down on the sand, Jack lowering himself down next to her.
Only moments later, Kate found Jack's arm wrapped snugly around her waist and slowly felt herself leaning into Jack's chest. She couldn't help but think how perfect it felt, like for some reason they were meant for each other. I hope Jack feels the same way. I could lie here with Jack forever. The time passed fairly quickly, Jack mustering up all his courage and Kate just enjoying the moment.
"Kate? Kate?" Jack whispered, finally having gathered the courage. Kate looked up and gazed into his eyes. She'd known him long enough to know that something was up.
"I've been thinking about this for ages, but I don't really know how to say how I feel. So I'm just gonna go for it." Jack began, nerves setting in, immediately drawing Kate's attention.
"I fell in love with you the moment you stitched me up on the beach. The weeks we shared on the island were the best weeks of my life. I wasn't working all hours of the day; I was living on a tropical island, and best of all I was with the woman of my dreams. And when you left…" Jack trailed off at a rather awkward moment, trying to gather his thoughts.
"It made me realize…that I couldn't live without you, Kate. I tried to get over you, I felt I owed it to you and to myself to move on… but I couldn't do it. I love you too much." Jack continued as he fiddled nervously with the box in his pocket, glancing up to see tears trickling from Kate's eyes. "I finally realized that you are the only one that I want to spend the rest of my life."
"Kate Austen, will you marry me?" Jack asked as he opened the box in front of her, apprehension flooding through him.
"Yes." She cried, as Jack slipped the ring on her finger. "Of course I will, yes". She repeated through tears of joy as she embraced her fiancé tightly.
Kate still remembered the night Jack had popped the question vividly. It was without a doubt the happiest night of her life.
It was the first time in her life she'd craved commitment. Until that point in her life, she'd always been on the run- whether it be from the police, the Marshal, or even love; she'd never stopped running.
She knew the moment she'd met Jack they had something special, but she'd been scared. Scared of the commitment, scared of what would happen upon their rescue, scared of a not-so happy ending.
So she'd run from him; pushed him away. It had broken her heart, and his, to do so, but at the time she felt it was the right thing to do. How wrong she'd been.
It was weird to think about this story today of all days, the day of her wedding, the day she would become Mrs. Jack Shephard.
"Are you ready?" Claire, her Maid of Honor, asked from behind her.
"Yea. I think so." Kate answered hesitantly, forcing a nervous smile. She wasn't getting cold feet; far from it actually. There was nothing more she wanted to do in the world, she was just extremely nervous, just as almost every bride got before their big day. All the planning had been done, the endless hours of time put in and all that was left to do was enjoy it. Something very difficult for Kate to do when, in her mind, so many things could go wrong.
"Relax, Kate. It's going to be great. There's not to many people here, just everyone from the island…and Mark, Margo and your parents. Plus, Jack's looking great out there." Claire said, raising her eyebrows jokingly.
"Eww, Claire. Jack's your brother!" Kate shrieked.
"Half-brother, actually, Kate." Claire corrected her.
"But still…" Kate said, secretly glad that Claire had found a way to ease her wedding day nerves.
"C'mon Kate, let's go get you married. This is going to be the best day of your life."
481516234248151623424815162342
"What the hell is up with you today, bud?" Mark asked up at the altar.
"I'm just nervous, man. I mean, it's Kate, you know how I was with her. I am allowed to have nerves, right?" Jack responded.
"Fair enough, Jack. Just relax, trust me, this is going to the best day of your life. Not to mention what happens tonight." Mark said suggestively, elbowing Jack in the ribs to emphasize his point.
"Dude, c'mon." Jack began to say, but was interrupted as the wedding march began to play.
"This is it dude. No more nerves. You'll do fine." Mark whispered as Kate emerged, patting Jack on the shoulder.
The ceremony proceeded quickly, Claire saying a brief few words, followed by the minister beginning the most important part of the ceremony itself- the vows.
Jack lightly took Kate's hands from her side, and held them together in between the two of them, as the minister began.
"Do you, Jack Shephard, take Kate Austen, to be your wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part?" The minister asked.
"I Do." Jack announced clearly, and the minister, and the guests, turned their attention over to Kate, who was wearing a gorgeous, strapless, white dress.
"Do you, Kate Austen, take Jack Shephard, to be your husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part?" The minister asked.
"I Do." Kate pronounced, a huge smile on her face and a tear in her eye.
Aaron appeared, almost from nowhere, carrying the rings. Giving one to Jack and one to Kate, they slipped the rings onto each other to reinforce their newly created bond.
"I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride." The minister said, and Jack didn't need to be told a second time.
They shared a short but sweet kiss that portrayed all the emotions they knew they were both feeling- nervousness, fear, relief, and most of all, pure joy.
"May I now present to you, Mr. and Mrs. Jack Shephard." The minister announced to the assembled guests, gesturing for Jack and Kate to begin their walk back down the aisle.
As they left the altar hand in hand, they were met with many congratulations from all angles. First to go were Claire and Mark, who made sure they were the first to congratulate the newlyweds.
"Congratulations." Margo said, hugging both Jack and Kate as they walked by her spot in the assembled crowd.
They passed Kate's parents next. Kate's mother was barely able to mutter a congratulatory word she was crying so profusely, and so Sam stepped in for her. "Congratulations, you two. You finally got your happy ending." He said.
"Thanks, dad." Kate hugged her father, shedding a few tears of her own in the process.
"Thank you, sir." Jack said, shaking Sam's hand as they began to walk away.
"Oh, one more thing son." Sam called after them, causing Jack to turn slightly.
"It's Sam. Call me Sam." He smiled.
"Will do, sir… I mean Sam." Jack stuttered nervously, drawing an amused chuckle from his new wife by his side.
They had just passed the final row of guests when Jack heard a voice from behind him, presumably offering congratulations. He turned around to address the man, walking towards him when he saw whom it was.
"Hey Doc, congratulations. Didn't think you'd actually invite me." Sawyer said seriously, extending his hand. It wasn't common to find Sawyer in a deadly serious mood, at least not when it concerned Jack. He was always cracking jokes, coming up with nicknames, or finding some way to one-up him.
"Thanks, Sawyer. And hey, thanks for coming." Jack said, accepting his handshake before turning around and heading back and looping his arm through his wife's as they left the ceremony.
"What's Sawyer doing here? I know you said we should invite him, but I didn't actually think he'd come. I haven't seen him in ages." Kate asked curiously.
Jack chuckled lightly before saying, "I made him a promise."
Jack remembered that day like it was only yesterday, and here he was in the place he'd called home for all those miserable years of endless working hours, a non-existent social life, and a depressed demeanor. St. Sebastien's Hospital.
Kate was barely minutes away from entering the final stages of labor. She'd been in this hospital bed, with Jack's hand in hers, for the better part of three hours. It hadn't been a particularly painful labor from what Jack could make of it, but then again, what did he know about pregnancy.
Jack knew from all his experience as a surgeon that labor wasn't a very dangerous process, especially not compared to the procedures Jack was doing in his line of work. Managing the birth of a baby was child's play compared to the many complex spinal surgeries Jack was used to doing day in and day out.
But when someone you love is involved, even the slightest amount of danger is internally amplified beyond belief, even when there is very little reason to do so.
"Jack! They're coming!" Kate screamed, gripping Jack's hand tighter than ever before. Jack had heard that carrying twins was generally more taxing on the mother than a single child, but so far Kate had disproved that information in every way possible.
Jack held on to Kate's hand, giving her all the support she needed.
"Ahhh!" Kate yelled in pain, as she pushed with all her strength.
"You can do this, Kate. Push. You can do this." Jack urged her, wrapping both his hands around hers protectively.
"That's it, Kate, keep going. You're almost there." Dr. Henderson said confidently. As nervous as Jack, and he was sure Kate, felt, it definitely helped to have someone so experienced in the matter in the room.
Kate screamed in pain again as she continued to push. She was growing tired, and so every push was becoming more difficult.
"You can do this, Kate. Just keep going. It's almost over." Jack continued to urge.
"You're almost there Kate. The first one is crowning. Almost out." Dr. Henderson provided some encouragement. "That's it! It's a boy!" Dr. Henderson announced, as Kate continued to fight the pain.
"Almost there, honey. Keep going, one last push and it's all over." Jack supported her.
"The second baby is almost out, Kate. Give me one last push. You can do this." Dr. Henderson said.
"Ahhh!" Kate screamed as she put all her energy into one final push.
"There it is. That's it Kate. The baby's out. You're all done." Dr. Henderson informed her, as the nurse cut the umbilical cord, "It's a girl."
"If you'd like, you can hold your new twins for a few minutes before we take them for their immunizations. We should have you out of here and home in just a few days." Dr. Henderson informed them politely, before leaving the new parents to properly greet their newborn children.
Kate was still extremely run down from the labor, and so instead of uttering a response, simply nodded her head and tightened her grip on Jack's hand.
Jack, being the gentleman he was, answered for her. "I think that would be great." He said, stealing a glance at Kate. Even in her tired, sweaty and exasperated state, and her hospital gown, she still looked stunning to Jack.
"So have you two settled on names for the twins?" The nurse asked as she handed over the twins, one to both Kate and Jack.
Kate cast a sideways glance at Jack, who knowingly gazed back before Kate answered, "Yes, we have actually. We're going to name them…"
"Lilly, baby, go find Matthew and wake up your father. Claire will be here soon with Aaron. Then we can head to Santa Monica." Kate said to her daughter, who was still in her pajamas.
"OK mommy, we go wake up daddy." Lilly replied happily, as she toddled off to find her twin brother.
She found him quickly in the living room, playing with his Millennium Falcon action figure. Matthew would play with almost anything, but he especially loved Star Wars. Lilly, on the other hand, would play with anything as long as there was someone else to share it with.
"Matt! Mommy says we go wake up daddy." Lilly told her brother, her elder by mere seconds.
"Yay!" Matt said jumping up and leaving his toy on the ground where he had been playing when they both headed hurriedly upstairs to wake up Jack.
481516234248151623424815162342
Upstairs, Jack was lying in bed, dozing off, enjoying a long night of rest after a particularly long workweek- and it was only Friday morning, there was still one day left. Jack was quietly hoping he wouldn't have to go in today when the phone rang, dismissing those hopes before they could properly manifest.
"Hello." Jack greeted groggily.
"Dr. Shephard, just confirming you're 11 o'clock consult with Ms. Bahrenberg, it was just moved up yesterday and I know how you are with your calendar." His secretary explained.
"Yea I remember, Jane…" Jack said to his secretary, "You know Jane, you think you could move it to back to Monday? I think I'm going to spend today with my family."
"No problem, Dr. Shephard. Have a good day." Jane answered.
"Thank you, Jane." Jack said, ending the call as he heard small, quick footsteps running up the stairs, and then feigning he was asleep once more.
"Daddy! Daddy! Wake up!" The twins shouted in chorus as they jumped onto the bed and climbed all over Jack.
Matthew was the spitting image of Jack, but was slightly more mischievous than his father had ever been. Lilly on the other hand, looking exactly like Kate had as a toddler, and was just as reserved. They'd both inherited Kate's pout though, the one Jack was unable to resist. It was that face alone that made it difficult for Jack to decline anything they asked for.
Jack groaned in discomfort as Matt and Lilly climbed over him. "Mommy says daddy get up!" Lilly said.
"OK, OK. I'm up." Jack said, admitting defeat. "You two go get dressed, you're going to the pier today."
"Daddy coming?" Matt asked.
"Yea, buddy. Daddy's coming." Jack said, instantly happier he'd decided to stay home for the day. He always had trouble telling either of the twins no, he normally relied on Kate to do that.
"Yay!" The twins screamed as they hopped off the bed and ran off to get dressed for the day.
Jack slowly sat himself up and wrapped a towel around his waist. He walked downstairs toward the bathroom to take a shower and wake himself up, almost tripping on Matt's Millennium Falcon toy on the way through the living room.
"Son of a bitch." He muttered under his breath, picking up Matt's toy and placing it on the kitchen counter, before picking up the paper to see if the Red Sox could repeat the feat of defeating the Yankees as they had when Mark had last visited. "A-rod." Jack muttered in disgust, tossing the paper back onto the counter before putting some coffee on.
Jack walked through the kitchen and upon hearing the shower as he entered the bathroom, grinned to himself. Slowly, Jack walked toward the shower and eased open the door.
"Good morning." Jack greeted.
"Morning, yourself. I bought you a razor." Kate replied.
"What? You don't like the scruff?" Jack said with indignation.
"The razors by the sink, Jack." Kate said, laughing lightly as she returned to her shower.
Jack walked over to the sink, and took out the razor, but was unable to start shaving before he heard the shower turn off. Immediately, Jack put the razor down and grabbed a towel on his way back to the shower.
He wrapped the towel around Kate as she opened the door, and leant in to kiss her. What Jack had originally planned to be a short peck turned in a much longer, more passionate kiss- not that Jack was complaining.
"Good morning." Jack whispered affectionately in between kisses. A few moments later, they broke apart, Kate smiling against Jack's chest.
"Aaron's almost here, so are you two ready to go to the pier?" Kate asked her children a short while later, kneeling down to their level. The kids had finished getting dressed and she had finished with her shower- although she had been held up while Jack showered just after.
"Yay!" The twins yelled. "Rides!" Matthew screamed. "Cotton Candy!" Lilly yelled.
"That's right, kiddos. Now, go get dressed you two. Auntie Claire will be here any minute with Aaron." Jack said, lightly pushing them up the stairs.
As the twins ran up the stairs to get dressed, Jack turned to Kate, wrapping her in his arms. "Hey, you ok?"
"Yea, I'm fine. You?" Kate asked in reply.
"Yea, I'm great. You just seem a little distant today. If anything's wrong, you know you can talk to me right?" Jack told her.
"I'm just nervous, I guess. Santa Monica's a big place, so many things could happen…" Kate began to talk, before Jack silenced her with a light kiss.
"Kate. We've taken them to the pier before; it'll be fine. You have nothing to worry about Kate; you're a natural parent. You're really good at this." Jack comforted her.
Kate paused a moment, accepting Jack's answer, before speaking. "Wait, we? You're coming? I thought you had work?" Kate questioned.
"I guess I figured some things are more important." Jack said, causing Kate to smile appreciatively, before hearing the doorbell ring. "That'll be Claire. I'll get it. Kids! Auntie Claire's here!" Jack yelled as he walked over to open the door for his sister.
"Hi, Claire." He greeted as the door swung open. "Hey, Charlie."
"Hey Jack, how's things?" Claire replied happily, while Charlie shook Jack's hand.
"Pretty good actually. Kate's just inside." He said pointing into the house behind him.
Claire didn't need a second invitation to share the latest gossip of their neighborhood with Kate, apparently gossip was in her nature.
After Jack and Kate's wedding, they'd moved from Jack's old place in Los Angeles to somewhere a little bigger in the suburbs, and it hadn't been long after that Charlie and Claire had moved in just down the street.
Charlie and Jack would call themselves pretty close friends, but Claire and Kate were on a whole different level- they were inseparable. They were constantly taking the kids down to the park where they'd talk for hours, catching up on gossip and recounting every last thing their children did.
"How's it going, Charlie. DriveShaft still goin' strong?" Jack asked per his usual greeting.
"Actually, I've got some news for ya there, Jack. I'm quittin' the band. I haven't told Claire yet, but I've felt for a while like I've been neglecting Aarons' childhood. I don't want to miss any more of it." Charlie explained.
"Aaron!" Lilly shouted as she ran in from the kitchen and hugged Aaron. He was two and a half years older than both Matthew and Lilly but the three of them got along really well.
At the sound of his daughter's voice, Jack turned around and once again reaffirmed his decision to take the day off. The last thing he wanted to become was his father- Matthew, Lilly and especially Kate deserved more. He wanted to be there with Kate for the twins first day at school, the first boy he'd have to scare into behaving around his daughter, their graduation, everything. Being a father was something to cherish, and it was one thing Jack was determined not to screw up.
"Let's get inside, shall we. If Claire starts talking, we won't make it to Santa Monica before sunset." Charlie quipped, evoking a chuckle from Jack.
"…I think someone has a little crush." Kate was telling Claire as they watched the three children playing together, when the two men walked inside, Jack walking behind Kate and kissing the back of her neck.
"Too late", Charlie quipped to himself before turning to face his wife, "Oh, alright you two. Claire's hard enough to get out. I don't need it from you too, Jack." Charlie joked, earning him a slap in the arm from Claire. As they walked outside, Aaron in tow, Charlie muttered, "And I thought the verbal copulating was the worst of it. Bloody hell!"
"Right. Ready to go Mrs. Shephard?" Jack asked, turning his attention back to Kate.
"I sure am, baby." Kate replied, reaching up to kiss him softly.
481516234248151623424815162342
It had been a hugely successful day at the pier, all three kids coming home with at least three stuffed animals and not much energy. This second fact had been proved when, for the first time in their young lives, they put themselves to bed. Jack had gone upstairs to read them a story before Jack and Kate went to bed themselves.
"Alice took up the fanning as the hall was very hot. She kept fanning herself all the time she went on talking. Dear, dear, how queer everything is today. And yesterday things went on just as usual. I wonder if I've been changed in the night. Let me think was I the same thing when I got up this morning?" Jack read from the book, before glancing behind him to see Kate watching him from the doorway.
Jack smiled upon seeing Kate watching- a smile she returned- before finishing the story, "But if I'm not the same, the next question is, who in the world am I? That's the great puzzle." Jack said, before closing the book and delicately putting it on the table between the twin's beds.
Jack exited the room, quietly turning off the light, and Kate shut the door behind him.
"You're a natural." She said, leaning back on the wall.
Jack smiled. "Yea?"
"Yea." Kate affirmed.
"My old man used to read me that story."
"Really?" Kate said, smiling.
"What?"
"It's just sweet hearing you say nice things about your dad." Kate explained.
"I don't say nice things about my dad?" Jack asked, even though deep down he knew he didn't. If he was truly honest with himself, he still blamed him for his more life-changing mistakes.
Kate raised her eyebrows, and lightly shook her head to indicate Jack's instinct was correct.
"Well he was a good story teller, I'll give him that." Jack recalled one of his fathers more memorable traits. "Hey. You ok?" Jack said, noting Kate's somewhat distant expression as he sidled up to her and placed his hands around her waist, and action she immediately reciprocated.
"Yea. It's just…I…I love seeing you with them." Kate said. "I'm so glad you changed your mind. I'm so glad you're here." Kate whispered.
"Me too." Jack said as he leant in to kiss her. He softly lifted her up, and Kate wrapped her legs around his waist allowing the kiss to deepen.
Jack got the message quickly, and began to run towards their bedroom carrying a giggling Kate the entire way.
They were truly living the dream.
As a little girl, Kate had wanted the entire package- the house in the suburbs, the loving husband, the adorable children and even the white picket fence. All that had changed when she'd killed her father though- all her dreams went out of the window. It was true she'd made many mistakes in her life leading up to this point, many of which she had come to regret. But thinking back upon her life now, she wasn't sure she regretted any of them any more. If she hadn't made every single one of those mistakes- if she hadn't gone on the run, if she hadn't fled to Australia, if she hadn't boarded Oceanic 815, then she might never have met Jack, the man who'd found it within himself to give her a second chance; a second chance she probably didn't deserve. Given that chance though, they'd found love and happiness together; and to Kate, that was the most important thing in the world.
Jack had given her a blank slate. A fresh start. Tabula Rasa.
The End.
A/N: I'm a little skeptical about the ending, as I originally had it ending as they headed out to the car for the pier, but I kinda wanted to sum it up at the end. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE tell me what you thought of the ending good or bad. That way I can improve the ending of my future fics. But anyway, I'd like to her what you thought of this chapter, the ending, the entire story...anything lol. I tried a relatively new technique for me as you may have noticed with the whole flashback in a flashback in a flashback thing, so I'm not sure if that was as effective as I'd hoped. But if it wasn't, hey it was worth a shot.
Anyway, before I start working on it. Here's a little summary for my next fic, which will be another Jate AU. It may start (relatively) the same as Tabula Rasa, but I promise you I'm taking it a totally different direction: Jack and Kate are best friends with a past. But when Kate goes away for 2 months on a business trip, she has a surprise for Jack. A BIG one. How will Jack feel about this surprise? Will he realize that his feelings for Kate may run deeper than he originally thought?
Yes, it sounds corny, but I hope that when you read it, it'll be better lol, that's my hope anyway. Soon, I'm going to post a oneshot about a conversation that I believe needs to happen in S6 centering around why Jack felt the need to detonate the bomb. It's going to be a Jate. I hope to have more of a sneak peek (like actual dialogue) to post when I publish that fic.
Wow, way to much writing. I think I bored you, maybe not if you're reading this. Oh well, thank you so much for reading! And lastly, PLEASE REVIEW!!!