Chapter 13

Last night was the first night that Leah and I slept together. Normally, she slept and I watched for a little while, and then rejoined the others. As I awakened with her in my arms bliss took me over. This was the most normal thing that we'd done together. I'd imagined her waking up and us discussing today's events, her smiling at me and I'd kiss her all over her face. I wanted her to know that I desired her. Leah just needed to realize that I'd rather her be alive. I yawned and shifted in the bed hoping that my movement would wake her. She lay there still as ever with an angelic expression on her face. I didn't want to leave her, but my thirst was starting to agitate me, more appropriately put, I was burning. I always burned after I slept. I jostled her a little and tried to get her to awaken.

"Leah," I whispered as I shook her. "Leah?" Something wasn't right. It never took me this long to wake her. I was starting to panic. I'd killed her. I ripped the covers off of us and examined her again. I watched as her chest cavity rose and fell, and then listened for her heartbeat. It was slow much slower than its normal rhythm.

"Carlisle!" I scooped Leah up into my arms and ran with her into his office. "Carlisle!" I burst through his door and Esme and he both looked at me as if I were a man possessed. "I've killed her she won't awaken. I've tried everything. She just lays limp." I was shaking with rage and guilt. Carlisle stood and approached me, he tried to take Leah out of my arms but I couldn't part with her.

"Calm down son," he uttered softly. "Let's take her back to her room so I can examine her there." I turned around and noticed that the household in its entirety was now looking on. They followed Carlisle and I back to Leah's room while he examined her. It only took him a few minutes to produce a verdict. "It's seems to me that Leah's body is showing signs of … and this can't be right, but it seems as if she's been injected with venom." Everyone looked around accusingly until I spoke up.

"Last night, I was tired, Leah and I weren't as careful as we normally are and I kissed her fully. The venom laced in my saliva must have gotten into her system." I spoke with remorse covering my every word.

"You dumb imbecile you've killed her!" Jasper spoke the words that were echoing in my brain. He looked as if he wanted to attack me. That wouldn't be smart on his part, I know he's skilled in battle but he's never seen the likes of me, plus he already underestimates me I'd easily beat him.

"Not necessarily," Carlisle said as he listened to Leah's heartbeat again. "Since Leah's a shape shifter the venom should have killed her almost immediately, actually within two minutes. However, she has made it through the night alive. The change her body is taking it seems as if she's turning. If that's the case we need to make the house ready for a new vampire."

"Is it possible for a shape shifter to become a vampire?" Jacob asked. He seemed completely baffled by the situation.

"No, not normally." Carlisle responded.

"Well, we didn't think it was normal for a woman to become a shape shifter, and Leah did that. So anything is possible." Seth said as he approached his sister and grabbed her hand. "She'll be alright." He whispered. I wanted to be optimistic like he was, but my doubts and guilt were weighing on me heavily. I backed out of the room and away from the damage I'd caused. I sat in the living room and stared at the same picture that had captivated me before, Leah and Ren smiling together happily. How could I have ruined such a beautiful image? How could I have been so selfish? Why did I continue to kill the people closest to me?

"I never should've touched you," I whispered to the picture framed in gold and silver.

"I don't think she'd be happy about that." Bella joined me and sat on the couch. "Leah and I aren't close."

"You mean you and her weren't close … I've killed her." My back was turned to her and I couldn't look anyone in the face.

"No, I'm pretty sure I meant what I said. Leah isn't dead yet. She's a stubborn old hag and she won't die easy." Bella laughed and I shot a glance at her. "Whoa, I was joking. Like I was saying Leah and I aren't close, we're completely different, but I love her cause she's part of this family, and so are you Nahuel. You've changed so many parts of Leah for the better and I think she would've died miserable and alone if she'd never met you." Bella sighed.

"Is this supposed to be making me feel better?" I said darkly. "If she hadn't met me she'd be up moving around happily right now."

"If she hadn't met you she'd probably be simply existing and not living. She'd always be searching for her missing piece."

"Please Bella, spare me your ramblings. You're not the waiting to see if you were single handedly the cause of your mates death!" Tears, it wasn't often that I experienced them. I wiped them off roughly not wanted to show one of my weaker traits.

"Nahuel, please listen to reason. Instead of stewing down here why don't you sit with her remind her that you're waiting for her to return." She got up and touched my shoulder and I flinched away from her. I couldn't sit with Leah, and witness her death. As she would take her last breath I'm sure that I would do anything to join her in death. My guilt would engulf me and swallow whole. I sat down and smoothed my hair back. I remembered watching her paint, and how she would smile at the canvas as she would breathe life into her paintings. I remembered how I couldn't resist seeing that face. It was my stupid impulses and weakness that was the cause of her downfall. All of this was my fault. "Nahuel," she went to say something and I covered my face.

"I know you mean well, but I need you to leave me alone." I mumbled to her from behind my covered face.

"Okay, but if you need me come find me." She finally left me with my thoughts. I sat there; I'm not sure for how long. It wasn't until Carlisle came in that I was awakened from my memories, that once was the cause of my bliss and now were the cause of my torture.

"So, I've hooked Leah up to an IV so that we can feed her. Her heartbeat seems stable and that's all I can really say right now." He paused as he took in my disposition. "Everyone has left her room if you wanted to … be with her."

"I'd rather be alone," I murmured.

"Well, I'm sure she wouldn't want to be. I mean the child is in there fighting for her life the least you could do is hold her hand." He left me and when he put it that way I had no choice but to go to her.

My jaw clenched as I fought the urge to scream. I moved the recliner closer to the bed and sat with her. Her breathing was even her face was still full of color. Maybe I was over reacting? Maybe her body just needed to adjust? "Leah, come back to me." I whispered as I grabbed her hand, she exhaled and her heartbeat adjusted to my presence. It was amazing how her body was in tune to mine. It was amazing how we were together in general. I couldn't believe that fate would taunt us with this brief moment of happiness. Maybe this was just a test of our love? Watched her innocent looking face, it looked like she was sleeping, and she could wake up any second. Even though I prayed a miracle would happen something told me, I wouldn't be seeing Leah's pretty brown eyes for a very long time.

Author's Note: Hey all! Here's another chapter! I hope it reads well it's the one story that's not being beta'd so excuse its roughness. I yearn for your reviews please place them in my hand! Please no flames because they'll burn my hand off.