Chapter 8

I take a deep breath as I put the last few details on the dessert I am making.

The entire day had been so chaotic. Since I couldn't get to the studio to clear my head, baking was my other source of escape. I smiled as I thought of everything that had happened.

The day hadn't started out as I had planned. Kagome had appeared at The Tashio Mansion at six in the morning. Barging into my room as my wake-up call and saying she had 'big news'. She then made a big hand gesture, lifting her left hand in front of her.

"My but my hand feels so heavy." She said in a sing-song tone as she wiggled her fingers.

The next thing I knew I was screaming with excitement as I lunged over to her and admired the simple white gold band, along with the small diamond ring on her left hand. Kagome had been glowing with happiness.

Of course she apologized for the rude interruption. When I asked her when this had occurred, she told me it had happened the day after my engagement party. Inuyasha was so anxious for them to tie the knot that he literally kidnapped Kagome and got married in Las Vegas!

I was so shocked that she actually agreed to it! She never did anything spontaneous or unexpected. Kagome was always an organized and traditional person that planned everything.

She said that after the scare of almost losing her to someone else, Inuyasha was desperate to make her 'his woman.' Kagome was too happy with the outcome. She later went on to explain that they spent the last five days in Las Vegas as their honeymoon. She did promise her mother to have a more formal wedding later on but she didn't want to spoil my upcoming wedding with her news. With the mention of my wedding less than a month from now, I explained my plans to Kagome and how busy I was.

The rest of the morning was a blur as I rushed to meet with Lady Izayoi and continue with the wedding preparations, as well as my lessons.

I had helped the chef in cooking the appetizer and the entrée. The double lamb rib chops had a special glaze served with spiced rice and vegetables. Sesshomaru's were to be cooked rare while mine a medium-well. For dessert I had made an apple crumble with hand-made pistachio ice cream. I had the ice cream batter ready and was just plating the apple crumble.

I pull away to see the final product and I'm satisfied with the result. I smile and pull my bangs away from my eyes and turn to look at the clock. My whole body freezes when I see the time. It read 3:13pm and Sesshomaru said he would be arriving around four!

"Chef Vin! Chef Vin! I need to get upstairs and change, the dessert is ready. Thank you so much for allowing me to help!" I call out as I hurry to take off my apron and clean up the area. I push away from the table, ready to run toward my room and change when the person standing in the kitchen entrance makes me halt and loose my breath.

My mind couldn't comprehend what I was seeing, but I knew I should.

Sesshomaru. In all of his perfect glory, wearing his impeccable business suit was staring back at me. I shook my head and even took a second glance toward the clock to make sure I hadn't read it wrong.

Nope it clearly says I have forty minutes left to get ready! I didn't want to be caught messy with flour and Kami knows what all over me!

I take a step forward as he looks around. "I thought you said you were arriving at four? I would say welcome home but now everything is ruined."

He tilts his head as he continues to look at me. His eyes narrowing, searching mine as if I were hiding something from him, then glancing around the room once more. "My flight arrived earlier than expected."

I groaned as he finally answered my question. "You could have at least called me. Now the surprise is ruined, I don't even have time to get ready properly. I was really hoping to surprise you."

All the time I had spent trying to keep it a surprise was hard because I was so unsure if my choice would be good enough for his taste. I wanted each dish that was presented during the meal to be a surprise. The chef had even ordered special coverings that would hide the scent of the meals. I pushed away the disappointment and focused on the now. I could still enjoy this dinner with my future husband.

"I don't like surprises."

Those words were not what I wanted to hear. Anger, hurt and disappointment rushed through me as I looked away. I cleared my throat as I tried to get my emotions under control, because if I didn't the tears that were close to the surface would break free. The pain in my chest couldn't be ignored, making it hard to breath and I just wanted to get away. The problem was he was blocking the only exit. Once I was confidant I wouldn't break down, turn my head back to Sesshomaru.

His amber eyes were roaming my face as a slight frown formed. He took a step closer, as he spoke "Rin-"

"I apologize My Lord. My only intention was to create a special meal for your home coming. I now know not to disturb you or your home with my unnecessary surprises. I'll leave you in peace and return to The … Mansion." I had kept my voice void of any emotion until the end. Ashamed and angered, I manage to make a quick side step around Sesshomaru only to feel his hand clasp mine and prevent me from leaving.

As he turns me around, I refused to look at his face and stare at the knot of his tie. I know I'm being childish but what hurt the most wasn't the fact that he ruined my surprise. It was that he looked at me with suspicion and accusations. As if I was hiding some big secret and had betrayed him somehow. If he didn't feel comfortable with not knowing what I had planned all he needed to do was ask and I would have told him everything. Throughout this whole arrangement I have been completely honest, now I question if Sesshomaru will ever let his guard down enough and trust me.

He pulls me closer and I suddenly feel myself being embraced by his soft fur.

His mokomoko.

I close my eyes to push away the pain until all that remains is a small ache. I know that once I get away, my tears will eventually fall but I didn't want to break down in front of him. I wanted to remain strong.

I feel his clawed hand cup my cheek and I slowly open my eyes to find him staring down at me. His face at a glance looked devoid of any emotion but it was the little details that revealed his true emotions. I had grown to notice them the more time I spent with him.

His jaw was tense. His lips were slightly pulled as if he was preventing himself from revealing his fangs. The one thing I had noticed is he could not fully control his eyes. It was like he was having some inner battle as his eyes flashed from their natural amber to blood red.

Finally he gently brushes his thumb against my cheek as he slightly frowns. "You're in pain."

His voice was a mixture of a growl and a husky rumble. His gaze was confused, probably because he could feel the pain I was experiencing. I had never been the type of person to run away from a problem, and I realized it was wrong of me to do that. I take a deep breath to try and calm my emotions. Determined to make him understand why I was upset. We are both new when it comes to being in a dedicated relationship.

"You hurt me." I whisper as his grip tightens around my waist. His soft pelt snakes around my neck creating a soft pillow. I hadn't been this close to Sesshomaru since our engagement. I was completely surrounded by him and his beast. Protected and shielded from the rest of the world and it took all my strength not to give in and embrace him. We needed to talk and set everything straight.

His eyes were now completely red and the angles of his face had become sharper. His fangs had lengthened slightly.

"How." This was the Lord Sesshomaru everyone feared, but I knew I was completely safe. He was ready to attack the cause of my pain but the fact that I told his he was the cause left him confused. He was confused and worried! My eyes widened as I realized that the emotions running through me weren't my own but his!

I lifted my hands to grasps the lapels of his silky suit. My eyes zeroed in on my left hand and I wasn't surprised to see my engagement ring a vibrant red. I cleared my throat and returned his gaze as I prepared to just explain everything I was feeling.

"You hurt me when you looked at me as though I had betrayed you in some way. Have I ever given you any reason to doubt me? I thought we had established that we were going to be honest with one another in order to make this marriage work. It just hurt, maybe I was wrong with my assumptions and that's just your nature?... I just. I know I will never be your 'mate' so there won't be such an intimate connection between us but-"

A loud growl interrupted my rant as he pulls my body flush with his. I can feel my face heat up and look away as I try to not think of how I can feel every part of Sesshomaru's strong and defined body against mine. His hand had been caressing my neck now moved back to my chin, forcing my gaze to return to his.

He slowly closes his eyes and leans his forehead against mine. His breathing becoming deep as if he couldn't get enough of my scent. Once he lifts his lids, the blood red color is no longer a burning, vibrant red.

"Tradition bids me to wait until the day before our wedding day to reveal to you everything our relationship will entail," his grip tightened around my waist. "But I will tell you everything, now. If you will still honor me with your homecoming gift."

I feel a smile form on my face as I look into those serious red ruby eyes. Sesshomaru was the only person I knew that made a request sound like a bargain. The pain turns to anticipation because I realize this whole argument was a stupid misunderstanding, but I still want Sesshomaru to know he could trust me. "Really? Whatever question I have will be answered?" I see him nod and my smile widens.

"I think we just had our first argument as a couple."

"Hn."

"Welcome home Sesshomaru. I hope you like what I made for you." On impulse I lean up and place a small peck on his neck and return his embrace. His soft pelt reveals the left side of my neck as I feel a low rumble coming from Sesshomaru's chest. I was about to pull away when I feel his nose bush against my neck. The small nip on my shoulder had my heart racing and I cleared my throat as I step back.

"Well…I'll let the chef know we are going to continue as planned and Oh Kami! I need to change; I look like such a mess! I'll take a quick shower and change; I'll meet you in the indoor patio."

I quickly turn and move to head toward my room when his hand claps my elbow and pulls me back. "You're perfect Rin. You don't need to change. Come."

He lifts his clawed hand and I immediately place it in his. As he leads me to the patio, I begin to relax because for the first time since this arrangement began I feel like I finally will get the truth about where I stand in this relationship from the man himself.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

We had eaten through a comfortable silence through the appetizer and entrée. Occasionally meeting each other's gaze as we continue through our meal. As the waiter clears our plates, I clear my throat and look up at my future husband.

He had taken off his suit jacket, and tie. His pale, muscular arms were visible as he pulled the ends of his black dress shirt up to his elbows. I couldn't resist following the red marks the led up his arms and disappeared beneath his shirt. He was leaning back in a comfortable stance and his eyes remained on me, even when he drank his wine. Hard I as try, the simple actions that Sesshomaru did caused me to blush as my thoughts turned a lustful direction. The worst part of it was I think he knew what he was doing to me, since his lips were tilted in a small smirk. His eyes had returned to their normal golden hue but his beast was still close to the surface since my ring still remained red.

I turn as I see the waiter returning with dessert. "I hope you enjoy the dessert. I made it myself, which was why you found me covered in flour and sauce." I bite my lip as the waiter uncovers the dish to reveal the apple crumble. A low growl sounds from Sesshomaru as he leans over to take my hand. His silver hair shining against the setting sun from the view. His bangs slightly falling over his eyes as he caresses my hand. He had been doing that throughout the dinner, always touching me in some way as if he couldn't help himself.

Never breaking our gaze, with his other hand he scoops a slice of the dessert and ice cream bringing it up to my lips. His head tilts to the side as he waits for me to open to eat. I hold his wrist, "I made it for you to-"

"You first." His voice low and slightly distorted.

I open my mouth and eat his offering. It feels like such an intimate moment I don't want to look away. Then Sesshomaru brakes our gaze, not letting go of my right hand as he takes a slice of the dessert and eats it. My nerves are at an all time high; my grip tightens around his hand to wait his opinion.

He continues to eat and offers me more but I decline, until he finally finishes the plate. "Perfect."

The air I didn't know I had been holding is finally released as I lean back and relax. "That was a great surprise, my Rin."

Hearing the possessive tone, it reminds me of the other reason why we are here. I look down and see that my ring is still red. Clearing my throat, I pull my hand away from his as I address my first concern. Placing both of my hands on my lap as I look down at them. "Did you really believe that I would do something against you? If you were worried about what I had planned you could have told me and I would have told you the truth."

I look up and see his eyes searching my face until he finally turn to look at the view. "Trust is something few have earned and many have broken. I have learned to always suspect the worst, that way the anger and disappointment isn't shocking when the truth is revealed. That doesn't make my reaction to your plans fair. It will take time to do the opposite of what comes natural, but I do trust you Rin." He looks back at me and I'm hit with the sincerity of his emotions.

"Do you really mean that? Because I want to believe but like you said it takes time to fully trust someone and I understand that. I was a complete stranger to you about a month ago so it's hard to believe that we will work out especially since I represent two things that hurt you. I'm a human and with this marriage I'm preventing you from finding your destined mate."

There. I had finally said what had been in my mind since I had read the contract. My worry over how he would come to despise me because I was the one that was preventing his happiness. My troubled thoughts are interrupted by a surprising sound. I look up and I'm shocked to see a smile on Sesshomaru's face. It's the first time I had ever seen him smile and it's an amazing sight. I feel my own form and realize that the husky chuckle in fact did come from him. His hand reaches over and cups my cheek. A warm feeling spreads across by chest and I realize its Sesshomaru and our bond.

"I assume that Lady Izayoi has already explained some of the meaning behind your engagement ring. The truth is Rin, the only person I would ever consider worthy of becoming its owner is not my wife..."

I couldn't breathe as I hear his answer, and all the hope I had shatters. I feel him move closer but the words keep repeating in my mind. A growl near my ear snaps me back "… but my perfect, honest and cherished destined Mate." His whispers in my ear and my mind spins with realization. Happiness, shock, excitement, and anger at that awful trick he played run through my mind when the next thing I know Sesshomaru's lips are against mine.

His lips were warm and smooth as he kissed and licked my bottom lip, asking me to open as he pulls me closer. What was more shocking was my reaction. My arms suddenly wrap around his neck as I open my lips to give him entrance and I responded to his kiss. It was like I had unleashed another side of me that had been waiting for this moment. Sesshomaru clasps me and brings me against his chest until I am straddling his lap. His hand tightens around my waist and the other buries into my hair. Our tongues battled for dominance until he takes full control and growls. Realizing this wasn't how I would react, I pull away gasping for breath. Sesshomaru continues to kiss, lick and nip his way down my jaw and neck only to journey back. Inciting my body and emotions further as I try to clear the fog of lust that threatens to cloud my judgment.

"What's happening… to me?" I gasp between breaths as I try to focus when all I want to do his pull his lips back to mine and devour him.

A|N: I was going to wait until Spring break but I had so many requests that I pushed to get this out quicker. RL is still taking alot of my time but know that I will finish this soon! ;) Enjoy!

p.s. I might have to change the rating, or do you prefer I make the mature scenes on a different document and keep it T?