The wind from the ocean caressed my skin like an old friend as I stood stoic on the hillside. The screams and cries of battle seemed to mask the true beauty of California's once historic coast line. But still being so connected to my Mother Earth I knew she was even more so under the pressure of the world's inhabitants.
"Polaris is down and we are losing strength," Betsy Braddock reports to me in a heavy breath as she kneels, exhausted at my feet.
"Only two more left and we still haven't even sent out the second assault," I replied to her not taking my eyes off the deep blue of the ocean. It has been so long since I've seen something so true, so natural that I couldn't take my eyes off it.
"Do you want me to send them out now?" Betsy asks as she raises her self to stand next to me as an equal.
"No not yet. Mystique will send them out when she is ready. She has no better timing than any other mutant I know," I reply coolly to her as I flick my eyes away from the calming sensation that the ocean provides me and gaze across the sand dunes that have, unfortunately, become our battlefield.
"Do you trust her still? Even after her scene with Cyclopes and Rogue," Braddock asks as she too looks across the waste land we had created for ourselves.
"A Mother's greatest regret in life is watching her own children make the same mistakes she has made. But for Raven hers was never telling Rogue how much she truly loved her and that in the end she didn't even have the will power to stop her from making a mistake she her self had made many times before," I explain to her as I cross my arms over my chest. I can see that Betsy's Blue Team and half of my Gold Team are going for Gazer or better known now as War, next.
"Do you ever miss it?" Psylocke asks as I see that Mystique has finally released her Red Team into the fray and we seem to have finally even the odds out even better than before.
"Miss what?" I question back dragging my eyes away from the battlefield to her.
"The life we once had," she sighs out never once looking at me but at the people below her. I can see just barely the flicker of white wings as they flutter in the distance, her own angel in the darkness, her Warren, fighting for their love, their lives.
"Everyday," I whisper out as if at any moment someone or something will come by and snatch my very little bit of hope away.
"Do you think we'll ever get even a moment of that back?" She continues to question and I respond to her as truthfully as I can to her.
"I pray that we do, but I know we never will."
"Do you think Rogue will make it?" Elizabeth asks and I feel my heart reach out to the girl. Elizabeth and Rogue have gotten so close over the years. Rogue being the younger woman's mentor for most of this war and even a little before that.
"No," I state firmly before continuing, "she won't want to survive losing him completely."
We're silent again for what feels like the briefest of moments before Elizabeth's normal curiosity is peaked again.
"She really loved him didn't she?" She asks me in a very child like kind of way and in that moment I realize how very young Elizabeth Braddock really is. She's barely twenty and leader for a team of resistance mutants who don't even know if they'll eat tomorrow or if they'll survive the night. She's too young to have to face a world so full of hate and destruction, to young for any of this.
"I think she still does," I say with a pause before continuing, "That is why she took the mission in the first place, I think. So that she could be the last one to see him, to be the one to tell him all her pains and all her love. You see Gambit and Rogue were lovers the moment they laid eyes on one another. Star crossed even before the war had even been thought of," I tell her as the memory of them together lifts a smile from my normally impassive features. So long ago was it that love seemed to be the only thing that stood in people's way.
"Gambit was always trying to win her affections even when she thought she was doomed to live a life of solitude. He was always there to give her a nudge in the right direction when she felt like nothing could go right. And she was always there to keep him grounded when his head got to high up in the clouds," I tell her as I almost start to giggle at the memories we all shared with them back at Xavier's Mansion.
"I think he loves her too," a voice so hard from years of abuse says behind me and I turn at its familiarity.
"Still, do you think?" I ask as I face my enemy turned comrade.
"I think he did it all for her. I think he thought if she really knew what he was up too she would be proud that he finally did something worthwhile in his life," Mystique confessed to me as she moves to stand on the other side of me.
Her once short hair is long now and the cool ocean breeze whips it madly about her blue skinned body as she stares desperately out into the battlefield. Her last surviving and youngest child is fighting in the throngs of the mutant resistance forces below. The last of her family fighting for what we all believe in.
"That's a lot to suggest about Death Mystique," Psylocke hisses out and I almost want to agree with her. But I know better, better than anyone here at least. Gambit loved her, he really and truly did.
"Every animal, demon or otherwise has a soul at one time or another Elizabeth. It's when the world turns it's back on it that it losses it to the dark," Raven snaps back her yellow eyes burning bright against her indigo skin as she looks away from her combating child to Betsy.
"Like you?" Psylocke counters and I brace myself for the fight that I know is about to start. But Raven surprises both of us as she sighs in what I assume is defeat, she has nothing left to fight for after this. She knows deep down Rogue won't survive killing Gambit and I figure she doesn't really believe Kurt will survive this battle, let alone the rest of the war.
"Yes just like me," she whispers out and I feel my heart reach out towards the woman I had befriended over these few hard years.
"Gazer's down," Mystique comments ignoring both of us as she watches the battle intently as it rages down below. I can see her eyes searching the crowds for her son trying to catch the smallest of glimpses of him to reassure her of his health.
"One to go," Betsy murmurs out as we watch captivated by the debacle going on down below.
We are silent as we gaze at what is left of the three teams as they move from one horseman to the last. Sunfire doesn't have a chance as he battles helplessly against our combined forces. The crackles of our radios scare us out of our resolve and we all switch our attentions from the scene below to the rushed voice of Scott Summers.
"Storm report," Scott's voice yells at us over the poorly connected line. I pick my radio up and hesitate for only a moment before responding.
"Two down only one firefly left to go," I respond somewhat cryptically into the radio.
"Excellent," he calls back to us and I take a breath of air as I ask the question we've all been waiting for answer too.
"What of the Rogue?" I ask.
"Mission completed," he says to us just as cryptically back. I glance at Mystique who seems more than on edge as she clutches her own radio in a grip worth dieing over.
"Her status," I ask hoping for the best and feeling for the worst.
"It is unknown at this time. We did however manage to regain members Wolverine, Phoenix, Iceman, Jubilee, Spike, Boom-Boom, Sunspot, Cannonball and Magma."
We all gasp in surprise. Our fallen members we had once cried and wept over were now once again within our ranks. I nearly dropped my radio at the mention of my nephew's name.
"We are moving into phase two of the operation," Cyclopes voice clicked across the radio and I knew that was the end of our conversation.
We're all looking down at my radio in shock, disappointing surprise. We are all more than elated about the recovery of our lost members, yet as the news of what Scott have reported to us about Rogue leaves an empty chasm in our chests. Was the life of one of our dearest friends worth that of nine others?
We hoped to never have that question answered.
I turned then to look into the face of a Mother who has possibly lost one of her children to fates cruel hand. Her face is set in eternal stone as she looks disbelievingly at the radio I still clutched tightly in my hand.
"Raven," I call out to her as calmly and quietly as I can, hoping to not frighten her and cause her to do something rash.
"We have a war to win," she says in a dead voice as she moves away from us and I can feel her heart breaking even from the distance we share.
Neither Elizabeth nor I say anything as we stand to move next to Raven. She's right, we do have a war to win and we've seen many of our friends and family numerous times before. This time shouldn't have been any different than the rest. But then somewhere in the back of my mind a whisper of words float across my psyche that makes me suddenly realize that it is different, that this time will always be remembered when other's won't.
She volunteered for this and nothing we could say or do could change that.