A/N: Thanks again for all the reviews! The song in this chapter is Fells Like Letting Go by Matthew Perryman Jones.

Oh my love
Help me open my heart again
Tear it open let the rain fall in
Wash this hardness underneath my skin

Fall 2014

Her eyes hurt from the brightness of the explosion, but she couldn't tear her eyes away. There was smoke and debris floating everywhere and it made her throat burn. Casey was directing the NSA cleanup crew to put out the fire and check for survivors, not that either of them expected there to be any. Sarah stood up, grabbed a gun and some knives from the trunk of her car, and took one last look at the fire before getting in the car. Casey was there in an instant grabbing her hand and taking the keys away.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going to go kill Anders. Give me my keys back."

"You know you can't do that, Walker."

"Watch me."

She reached to grab the keys out of his hands, but he moved back. She wasn't going to play this game with him. Knowing Anders, he was on his way to Fulcrum's air field so he could hop on a plane back to DC and continue with whatever evil scheme he was planning. She didn't have much time before he was gone.

"If you kill him now all of this would have been for nothing and we won't know how to stop him."

"A bullet between the eyes should do the trick."

"Damn it, Sarah!" he yelled. Casey rarely called her by her first name and his outburst took her off guard, but it didn't weaken her resolve. Right now she didn't give a damn about what Anders' plan was. All she could see was Chuck behind that door waiting to die because she was too late. She had failed him. Again. Sarah was going to make Anders pay for that. She reached into the glove box and pulled out her spare key. Casey was still yelling at her as she pulled away, but she paid no attention to him.

Oh my love
Let me hear your voice come through
I wanna know the love inside of you
Make this dark heart believe in what is true

Sarah was a little surprised that she had beat them to the airfield. Anders and his agents must have made a stop somewhere on the way. She was going to call Bryce, but thought better of it. It wasn't that she didn't trust him. Though their relationship was not always easy, she trusted him with her life. Still, she wondered what role he played in all of this. Was he there when they were caught? Did he know about the bomb? Even if he did there was a good chance he wouldn't have even tried to save them. Bryce was level headed in all of this. Protect his cover, complete the mission, save the world. In times like these he thought with his head, her with her heart. That's why she was crouched behind a large rock in the woods on the edge of the airstrip while he was still with Anders trying to find a way to stop him.

In her heart, she knew this was the wrong decision. They needed Anders alive, at least until they had figured out a way to stop his plan. They didn't even know the full extent of it. But the rage in her was too great to quell. They had finally started to work through their issues and were reconnecting when Chuck was ripped from her. In those final hours she had let herself hope. She thought that when this was all over they could buy a house, have a family, have that normal life he so desperately wanted. Before meeting him, Sarah had never really wanted a normal life. She'd never had one and learned to thrive off the excitement of her job. When she started wanting him, she started wanting that normal life. Chuck had opened her up to a lot of new things, but now that he was gone she feared those bridges she'd built would burn down again.

A black SUV pulled up, flanked by two smaller black cars. A few agents she didn't recognize got out followed by Bryce then Anders. Sarah set up her shot and waited for the perfect moment. It came and went and her hand was still tightly gripping her gun. She couldn't do it. It wasn't right, not that it wasn't justified, but because it wasn't her. Even in her darkest days as a Fulcrum agent, she killed and hurt others, not because she didn't care, it was that she cared too much. She cared about Chuck. She cared about Awesome and Ellie and her father. Not to mention the countless innocent people that would be hurt if she didn't complete her mission. Just because Chuck was dead didn't mean the mission was over. He'd want her to keep fighting.

As she stood up and backed away from the airfield, a strange feeling rose in Sarah. It wasn't quite relief, but it felt like a weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Her heart didn't feel as heavy. Then Chuck's face entered her mind once again and the feeling vanished. She had to go find Casey and figure out what their next move was going to be, but there was something she had to do first.

I know that in the dark there's a fear of letting go
I know that in my heart that I fear what I don't know

Awesome and Ellie's new house was beautiful. According to intel she dug upon them, they had been there two years. They moved in right after Ellie had given birth to a little girl they named Savannah. Sarah had smiled when she read that. She was happy for them. It would have been nice to have a niece. Maybe if she came out of this unscathed, she'd still have a chance to be some sort of makeshift aunt to the little girl. It'd be nice to have a family and she could think of no better one than the Woodcombs.

She had been parked across the street for the past fifteen minutes. This wasn't news she wanted to break, but she felt like she should be the one doing it. They'd know something was wrong the minute she showed up at their front door. How was she supposed to face Ellie? Gathering her strength, Sarah got out of the car and walked up to the front door. She took a deep breath and knocked softly. The window by the door caught her eye and she saw her reflection. She should have cleaned up before coming over here. There was still a large stream of dried blood running down the side of her face and dirt and soot covered every inch of her. Looking down at her hands, she realized they were bruised and bloody from banging on the steel door. Not only was she going to give these poor people horrible news, but she was going to scare them to death as well.

She heard voices and footsteps and braced herself as her heart dropped. A moment later she was standing face to face with Ellie Woodcomb.

"I know you must shocked to see me . . ."

"Sarah!" Ellie said cutting her off and engulfing her in her arms. Not quite the reception she was expecting. Sarah hugged her back relishing the moment.

"Ellie, there's something I have to tell you."

"I could barely believe it when he showed up," she continued ignoring Sarah's comment and still hugging her tightly. "Then he said you would probably show up at some point! It's so good to see you."

"Who told you I was coming?" she asked breaking away from Ellie.

"Chuck. He showed up about an hour ago. John Casey was with him."

Time seemed to freeze while Sarah replayed the other woman's words in her head. Chuck showed up an hour ago. With Casey. That wasn't possible.

"Chuck's here? He's alive?"

Ellie narrowed her eyes and looked behind her then back to Sarah. "Of course he is."

And this feels like letting go
And this feels like letting go
I'm letting go

She rushed into the house without waiting for an invitation from Ellie. She looked around and didn't see him. Was this just a cruel trick? Then she saw him at the top of the stairs staring down at her. He was holding a towel and his short hair was still wet. For a moment she thought she was dreaming. This was too good to be true. She watched the explosion. There was no way he could have survived and be at his sister's house fresh out of the shower. But then he raced down to her and enveloped her in a hug. Her arms hung limply at her sides, still not believing what was happening.

It wasn't until he kissed her forehead and whispered to her that she gave in. Sarah wrapped her arms fiercely around him and let the tears of relief fall.

"It's alright. I'm alright," he whispered. They stood there for awhile until she forced herself to pull away.

"I don't understand. I saw the explosion."

"I'll explain everything, but first let's get you cleaned up."

Chuck took her hand and led her up the stairs. She sat down on what she assumed to be the guest bed and watched as Chuck disappeared into the bathroom to get a first aid kit. Ellie came up and asked her if she needed anything from the grocery store, apparently she was planning a big feast in honor of their return. At first Sarah just shook her head and declined politely, but called the other women back when she thought of something. Ellie gave her a confused expression, but nodded and walked away.

A minute later Chuck was back and kneeling in front of her. He reached up to clean her wound, but she caught his hand and held it in hers.

"I thought I'd lost you."

"I know. I'm sorry I couldn't contact you. We'll have to get new phones so that doesn't happen again."

"You planning on almost dying again anytime soon?"

He chuckled and continued to clean the blood and dirt off her face. "No, but we both know how important it is to stay connected.

Sarah nodded, understanding the double meaning of his statement. "So how did you get out?"

It's hard to trust
When your heart's been broken times before
You pull the curtains and you lock the doors
Swear you'll never go out anymore

"I didn't, actually. Not until the cleanup crew put out the fire. The room we were in was like a bomb shelter. I heard the explosion, but nothing happened to me. About twenty minutes later, Casey was able to open the door and I just walked out."

"Wow."

"I don't understand it, though. Why did they throw us in a bomb shelter when they planned on blowing us up?"

"It was Bryce," she said putting the pieces together. "He must have been the one who threw us in there. The other agents probably didn't even know it was a shelter. No one knows these bases better than Bryce."

"That explains a lot then."

"Where's Casey?"

"He went to report to Beckman. Then I think he was going to look for you."

Sarah nodded and he placed a bandage on her cut. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"Where did you go after the explosion?"

"I went to go kill Anders." Chuck watched as a wave of many emotions passed over her face. She was staring at nothing in particular and seemed to be replaying the events in her head. "I almost did it too. I had the shot was so close to taking it, but didn't. Then I came here to tell Ellie what happened to you."

"Why didn't you do it?"

"I knew it wasn't the right thing to do. It would have destroyed everything we have worked for. I had this strange feeling right after I decided not to do it. It was . . . relief. I think a part of me knew you weren't really dead."

He smiled at her and she returned her gaze back to him. Chuck knew that feeling. All those years he waited, worrying, praying that she was okay. He'd have dreams where she died and he was unable to help her. Screaming, he'd wake up in a panic, but once he calmed down he knew she was still alive. It's like they were connected on some cosmic level. If she died, he knew a part of him would know and die with her. A tear fell from her eye and he reached up to wipe it away.

"What's wrong?"

"I can't stop replaying it in my head. That feeling when I knew there was nothing I could do . . . I can't describe it. It was so crushing and heartbreaking. I just felt empty. And I hear your voice telling me it's going to be okay, but it wasn't."

"But it's okay now. We're both okay."

I know that in the dark there's a fear of letting go
I know that in my heart that I fear what I don't know

When Ellie got home from the store Sarah thanked her and excused herself to take a shower. A good while later she was standing in front of the mirror in some of Ellie's clothes brushing her newly dyed blond hair. It felt so good to be able to look in the mirror and see herself again.

"Sarah? Are you okay up there?"

"I'm fine," she smiled. "Be down in a minute."

It felt like they had traveled back to a time when this was "normal" for them. Eating dinner with the Awesomes was something Sarah always looked forward to. It made her feel like a normal girl. Despite the craziness in their lives right now, she felt normal right now. She welcomed it, even if it only lasted a few more hours.

She reached the end of the stairs and Chuck's eyes were on her immediately. He raised an eyebrow at her new look.

"If we're going to take down these bastards I want to do it as me, not as someone pretending to be part of them."

"I've missed the blond," he said kissing her forehead as she stood beside him. It amazed her how easily they fell back into couple like behavior. Sarah figured it had always been there, but they had built barriers in those five years that made them reluctant to even touch each other. Those walls had tumbled pretty quickly when they were locked in that shelter.

"I really wish my niece was here. I'd love to meet her," Chuck said as they sat down for dinner. Sarah cast a sidelong glance at him remembering his words all that time ago. I'd rather have the world be safe for them.

"She'd love to meet you too. Both of you. We've told her stories about you guys."

That caught Sarah off guard. Ellie and Awesome had told Savannah stories about her? They had no reason to. Again, these people surprised her. Maybe they still considered her family. She knew no matter what they would always be family to her.

"She'll be back from my parents next week," Awesome chimed in. She and Chuck shared a look. With any luck this would all be over by then and they would actually get to spend some time with the little girl.

Dinner had been very enjoyable. They had shared stories from their adventures over the past five years. Well, mostly Ellie and Awesome shared while they just listened. Chuck and Sarah had given the occasional "the beaches in Panama are gorgeous" and "Paris is beautiful this time of year". The Awesomes didn't push for more information. They hadn't even asked many questions about what they were doing here. They had just welcomed them in like nothing had happened.

"We should go," she whispered to Chuck after dinner had ended. He just nodded and walked over to Ellie.

"Hey Sis, we have to get going."

"I figured as much. We'll see you soon right?"

"I hope so."

Well I'm stepping out
I can't see there is no sound
A seeming void becomes a solid ground
A sight I lost becomes a faith I've found

The climbed into Sarah's car and headed to meet up with Casey. Chuck was glad to have a few hours with his family. He had missed them so much. It was easy to see that Sarah benefited from the visit as well. They sat in a comfortable silence and watched the miles fly by. He started to think about their life after this was over. After they had won. There really wasn't any other outcome. They were going to win. They had to.

It wasn't really a question of if they be would be together. He had no doubts about that. It was just a question of where they were going to live, what jobs they would have, how they'd raise their kids. He shook his head to clear the thoughts. One mission at a time, Chuck. She had said that once, in another life. It was important to focus all his thoughts on completing this mission. There would be plenty of time for everything else.

"It's going to be okay, Sarah. I really believe that."

"I think you're right," she replied taking her eyes off the road to smile at him. She didn't sound as optimistic as he felt, but that was okay. As an agent he knew she was trained to prepare for the worst case scenario. Whatever the outcome, at least they got a second chance at being together.