Chapter 128
Your touch, your kiss, your warm embrace
Reading the letter a second time, Patrick's eyes pricked with tears. Without even realizing it, he had been waiting and needing to hear those words. While his ego had always been healthy, he was never under any illusion that he mattered that much to others. There was too much evidence, as an adult, pointing in the other direction - that while he may have been loved, he was not necessarily a priority. Eric had always been the exception to the rule and theirs was a friendship with deep roots but it was not quite the same thing as a romantic relationship. By allowing himself to fall in love he had given up the control and protection of himself he had spent years establishing. And instead of being destroyed by it as he always feared would happen, it nourished him.
And who you are is someone I love very much.
I believe in you.
There was simply no way Robin could know the power of those two sentences. He was enough - as he was. It was simply the single most amazing thing anyone had ever told him. And by being told that he was enough he suddenly wanted to be more; he wanted to be the man that Robin described in her letter because he wasn't sure he always was. There were two obstacles in his way - his speech and his memory - but he would conquer those because he had to. And then he could tell her without hesitation, without pen and paper, how he finally understood what it meant to be complete.
Hearing the door creak open his head snapped up as Robin tiptoed through, her arms filled with take out. Her gaze immediately went to the letter and then to his face looking for any advanced hint of how her words were received. Nervousness framed her eyes as she kicked the door shut behind her.
"Mike gave us double helpings which is great. I think we can freeze some of it and have a few meals for a while," she pattered anxiously, making her way to the kitchen and setting the bag down on the counter.
A small squeal burst forth from her mouth as Patrick took hold of her shoulders and spun her around to face him. His brown eyes were filled past the brim with love as he dipped his head and kissed her gently. She melted into him as she responded with her own soft, gentle kisses, lazily brushing her tongue against his, her teeth nibbling on his full lips.
He pulled away, brushing her hair from her eyes and gazed adoringly at her. "I love y-you," he whispered.
He rubbed the tip of his nose against hers, their mouths parted slightly and just out of reach from each other's. Robin pressed her body against his, groping and reaching for his mouth wanting, needing to fuse them together again. Sliding his hands down her back, Patrick took hold of her waist and hoisted her off the ground, allowing her to wrap her arms around his hips. She swallowed down his moan as they kissed deeply, their tongues melding together.
Not breaking their kiss he pushed away from the counter and with his hands supporting her, carried her down the hallway to the bedroom. As he pulled away briefly to gently lay her on the bed, Robin's hand reached out, cupping the back of his head and drawing him to her again. She sighed happily into his mouth as their tongues danced in languid unison and his body pressed against hers. She loved the feel of him, the weight of his body pressing against hers. Her hips rocked instinctively as he pushed into her, his arousal announcing itself.
Breathless, he pulled away from her mouth and attached his lips to her neck, nipping at her ear. Her hands ran through the downy softness of his hair and down the side of his head and over his shoulders. He was getting stronger, she could feel it in the muscles rippling underneath her touch. Patrick slid his hand inside her shirt, kneading her breast and teasing her nipple through the soft cotton of her bra. She gripped his shoulders as her body responded to his touch. As his fingers continued to dance along her skin, his mouth moved to the other side of her neck whispering kisses. Closing her eyes she exhaled as she felt his prickly stubble rub against her skin.
Her eyes flew open and she became suddenly rigid as his hands flirted with the waistband of her jeans.
"Patrick" she rasped with fear evident in her eyes.
Lifting his head he looked at her with adoring tenderness. He left tiny kisses on her cheeks and the corners of her mouth. "W-we can st-stop"
Cupping his cheek with her hand, her thumb stroking his face she stared at him. Her heart wanted to give in, wanted to reinforce how much she loved him but her head, her loud, noisy head kept getting in the way. She didn't want him to risk himself, not for anything. But her heart continued to thump inside her chest reminding her that everyday they each took risks of all kinds and she could not make decisions for him.
"We have to be really, really careful," she said when she finally spoke.
Turning his head, he kissed her palm. "We w-w-will," he assured her as best he could. Kneeling up, he pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it to the floor. He carefully removed hers before covering her chest in small, soft kisses.
Robin felt her breasts swell pleasurably in her bra and she instinctively arched up towards him. Sliding his hand underneath her, he flicked open the clasp and shimmied the bra down her arms. She lay before him, patches of discoloured skin strewn across her torso, and chewed on her bottom lip. His thumbs stroked her hips through her jeans and stared lovingly at her. Leaning forward he dropped a long, lingering kiss over one of the patches. Robin's eyes pricked with tears amazed at how he could find her at a moment when she felt least beautiful and yet make her feel more desirable than ever.
He began to explore the rest of her body, with his tongue following where his fingers had been, searching out the places he knew drove her crazy. Her hands slid over his ass, massaging him through his jeans and she smiled as he stopped his ministrations and closed his eyes, enjoying the feelings coursing through him. He trailed his fingers along the inside of her jean-clad thighs, delighting in the shiver he elicited as his knuckles grazed the sensitive spot at the apex of her legs. Her hips undulated against his hand, begging for more.
She mewled at the loss of contact as he stood up. His arousal was straining at his jeans and she watched in admiration as he kicked them off and his erection sprang free. Reaching for her, he unhooked the button on her jeans and pulled them off before adding them to the growing pile of clothes bedside. He opened the drawer of the nightstand, retreiving a condom and tore open the little packet. Normally he would sheath himself as quickly as possible but this was about trust - less of him and more of her trusting herself. He wanted her to give into the pleasure they were building together and so he took his time and let her see that he was as well protected as could be.
He smiled in satisfaction as she held her hand out to him, beckoning him to her. Crawling towards her on the bed, he kissed her mouth, pushing his tongue between her lips. Robin accepted it greedily, kissing him hotly in return. Sliding inside her, he stayed completely still for several beats, waiting for and wanting her to take the lead. Robin's nerve endings were already buzzing and while she had the fullness she craved, she lacked the friction to get where she wanted to be. Lifting her hips off the bed she pushed against him, urging him on. He slid his arms around her, holding her tightly. He nibbled on her shoulder as she worked her tongue against his neck. They moved together in rhythmically, first slowly but then gaining in intensity as they hurtled towards their climax. His thrusting became more powerful but feeling her holding back, not quite able to let go, Patrick dipped his hand between them and ran his thumb over the sensitive bundle of nerves. Robin gasped, wrapping her legs tightly around him and called out his name. Feeling her let go, Patrick allowed himself to give in and their bodies shuddered as they tumbled over the edge together.
He pulled out quickly and disposed of the condom. Returning to the bed, he gathered her in his arms and peppered her temple with kisses as they struggled to regain their breath. As her breathing lengthened, Robin turned in his arms and looked into his eyes.
"Thank you" she said softly with her arms lazily stroking his soft skin, "for loving me."
And who you are is someone I love very much.
I believe in you.
Patrick pushed her damp bangs from her face and kissed the tip of her nose. His heart was full and racing far faster than his head could ever hope to. Without a second thought, he opened his mouth to speak.
"M-m-marry me."