The Events! Part 22: Rubbing it in.

A/N: This should hopefully remain empty but knowing my update schedule will include three months worth of garbage I -at the time- thought would be a good idea leaving in.

List:
Active: Pikachu, Bowser, Peach, DK, Captain Falcon, Ness, Nana, Popo, Samus, Zelda, Link, Pichu, Young Link, Mario, Falco, Yoshi. 16
Inactive: Kirby, Fox. 2

Disclaimer: Characters belong to Nintendo and SEGA.

Warning: Like the last twenty one chapters, this chapter is M. So if you are under the age of 15 (or sixteen?) please leave. If you, stay well it's your fault not mine.

Replying to Reviews (Acountless): If you don't have an account when you Review I'll reply here, unless you ask for my reply to be here. Elsewise, I'll PM you. (Unless again, you ask for me not to)
KeepWriting: Thank you so much for reviewing, and yes this does help me realise someone out there (even if just you) is actually reading! As for Mr. Game & Watch's stats, well that's actually a secret and big hint to something. . . maybe around events 38-41, or just one of those! :) But good spot and that also confirms to me that people are reading the stats.

^1:28 PM - The Asylum of the Insane^
"Feels so good to be back!" Falco states as he flopped down onto his bed, "Wait! The hell am I saying!" Falco growled slapping himself, "I need to stop talking to myself!"

Captain Falcon was happy, so happy he could even be excited if one were to want a better description. He had just returned to his room to find a small note on his bed detailing about a certain 'request' that involved him knitting something. The letter read as follows:

Dear Captain Falcon, please do not be alarmed by the *scribbled out words, probably multiple misspelt attempts at spelling a word* pressance (please excuse my spelling) of this note. I have heard of your services and wish to get something. I however feel that in doing so my 'image' may be, as you could say 'shunned'. No offence intended but someone of my qualifications can't just go around asking for knitted stuff now can I!?
Anyway, I wish for you to create me a small, black hoodie. *line through everything till the next asterisk* My last one was wrecked by some *
So, once you create this hood I would like you to deliver it to that Ridley guys office door, then I'll sneak over and collect it. That way if someone sees it they won't want to mess with the councillor, would they!
Please have this done before ten tonight because that is when I will be collecting it and I don't want anyone to see or know of me. Also, I'll leave you fifty Prim at Ridley's door after I take the hoodie so check up on it roughly half an hour after ten.

This is brilliant! My first order! And they're going to pay me! Captain Falcon quickly closed his door and pulled out some of his yarn from under his bed, he searched through them for the black one and quickly placed it done onto his laptop desk. He got his equipment ready and. . . realised he didn't have a needle! Or any spare Prim to buy one with!
"Who would have a needle?" Captain Falcon mumbled to himself as he clenched his fists in anger, he was angry because of how stupid he was to waste all his money on the yarn and not the equipment. After a few seconds of thinking he thought of someone, Falco.

Falco was laying asleep in his bed talking to himself when his door burst open (not literally) and Captain Falcon barged in loudly. "WAHH!" Falco screamed jumping with freight, he quickly sat up and glared at Captain Falcon. "What the hell are you doing in my room!"
"Hey Falco, you mind if I borrow your needle?"
"My needle? Get fucked!" Falco yelled pulling out a blaster and shooting him in the chest, his armour protecting him though.
"Come on Falco, I need it to knit!" Captain Falcon pleaded.
"Knit? That kind of needle? I don't have one, now get lost!" Falco yelled.
"Sorry bud, by any chance you know someone who does?"
Falco glared at Captain Falcon even more, he just wanted to be alone and he had finally got Fox to start explaining. "Alright then, go see Bowser. I heard that he's a greeeaaaat knitter."
"Really? Thanks Falco!" Captain Falcon shouts and loudly ran out of his room, not even closing the door.

Bowser and Mason were talking with each other in Bowser's room. Like usual Bowser was sitting on his bed while Mason sat perched atop of Bowser's pillow.
"We've almost reached a quarter of the needed Prim," Mason states smiling devilishly as he fiddled with the large purple coins sprawled on Bowser's bed.
"Yeah, soon we'll be able to buy the-"
Captain Falcon bursts through the door loudly causing the two to stop talking and glare at him. "Yo Bowser! Mind if I use your needle?" Captain Falcon energetically asked.
"My what?" Bowser snapped angrily.
"Get lost!" Mason yelled standing on all fours with his tail arched over his back in a threatening way.
"You know, needle. For sewing and whatnot, Falco said you had one and I need to borrow it!"
"I don't have one."
"Oh, well know someone who does?"
"No-"
"Whoa!" Captain Falcon interrupts. "Look at all that Prim! You two must have like thousands of 'em! Mind if I make a I Owe You so I can buy a needle for my knitting?"
"Yes we do mind! Now fuck off!" Mason yelled.
"Get lost, this is our Prim!"
"Whoa whoa whoa! Calm down guys, was just asking!"
"Sure you were," Mason growled and his ears then perk up, "you weren't eavesdropping on us were you!"
"What? Me? No way dude, that's not right!" The two still glared at Captain Falcon, who didn't take the hint that they wanted to be left alone. "So Bowser, know someone who does have a needle?"
"No!"
"What about you Mace?"
"Don't fucking call me that!"
"So do you?"
"No! Get lost!" Mason yelled jerking his tail forward over his back to fire an arc of electricity at Captain Falcon. Captain Falcon however stepped aside like he was expecting it.
"Anyway, good luck getting whatever you two are saving up on-"
"So you were listening to us!" Mason accused.
"No, I just had a feeling that with all that Prim you two are either hording or saving up. I guessed the latter."
"Go! Now!" Bowser demanded and with a shrug Captain Falcon left, actually closing their door.
"I'm glad I didn't get to mention the Soul Eater," Bowser whispers to Mason in relief.
"If you did he'll probably go down and buy it before us! I bet he has loads of Prim and just likes freeloading off others! Bastard!"
"Quiet, he may here you," Bowser whispered.
"I don't care."

^Azure Falls Base | North Quadrant^
Mario whipped his forehead with his sleave. Being Janitor was tough! But the pay was better than the events.
"So Mario, how'd you become staff?" A telekinetic voice asked Mario and he dropped the mop and spun around scared.
"Who said that?" Mario asked.
"Oh cool it, it's me Mewtwo," Mewtwo says materialising in front of him. This made Mario scream and slip over. "So when'd you join?" Mewtwo now spoke.
"My head hurts," Mario moaned standing up, he quickly shuffled away from Mewtwo. "Uh, earlier today. Why?"
"Was just asking, because this is the Mercurial side of the base and I was just wanting to know if you were meant to be an Imperial or a Mercurial."
"A what?"
"Mercurial or Imperial. I'm a Mercurial but my ex-master was an Imperial."
"I have no idea what you're talking about!" Mario shouts scared of Mewtwo.
"Who hired you then?"
"Crazy Hand, [short pause] wait no! It was Ganondorf I think! He thought I was the new janitor because I had this card," Mario says rummaging though his pocket for the Key Card.
"Oh okay. Any regrets abandoning the others or are you only working part time?"
"Pardon?" Mario asked as he found the key card. He pulled it out and Mewtwo's eyes widened.
"That's a very high clearance level you got!"
"And?"
"I doubt they want you working with the others if they've given you that high of a placing!"
"How high am I?"
"About 5'1 if we compare your Brawl model with Snake or Samus."
"I meant my place in the staff."
"Oh, roughly my level. You have access to virtually all rooms on the Airship, most rooms in the North, East and West Quadrants of this base. The South is actually controlled by the Imperials but Master Hand doesn't realise that. But I doubt you would have access to the rooms that are specifically used by Imperials."
"Mewtwo! Is that you I hear?" A voice somewhat familiar to Mario shouts from somewhere not too far away.
"Who's that?" Mario asked picking the mop back up and quickly mopping again.
"Oh that's just Kraid, an Imperial mixed with a Mercurial," Mewtwo telekinetically says and gave a weak shrug to accompany it.
"Are you supposed-ta be telling me all this?" Mario asked worried.
"Probably not but no one's explicitly told me not to tell random people our secrets."
"There you are Mewtwo I have been look- Mario! What are you doing here!" Krad yelled walking around a corner.
"Krad!" Mario growled and dropped the mop, he pushed his two palms forward firing a beam of fire at Krad. Krad was blasted up the hallway and after landing rolled/bounced a bit before stopping.
"Hey Krad, Mario's part of staff now," Mewtwo shouts and Krad groaned as he slowly stood up.
"Who knew he packed such a punch, GAH!" Krad screamed as Mario blasted him further down the hallway.
"Hey stop that, you two are on the same team!" Mewtwo stated and with a bright flash he teleported from aside of Mario to in front of Mario. (Two flashes in total)
"Mario!" Krad growled and ran through the hallway, Mewtwo held out a hand and Krad was encased in pink electricity that was shaped like a cage.
""You two stop fighting at once!" Mewtwo ordered.
"Krad lied about me! I hate him! More than Link and everyone else here in this fucked up asylum of mentally raping tasks that tare apart one's sanity!" Mario screamed, tears already forming.
"Whoa, what did I even do to you?" Krad asked as Mewtwo made the cage vanish.
"You lied about me! You got me in so much trouble with Link and Ridley and Shadow and everyone at this fucking place!" Mario screamed.
"When did I lie about you?" Krad asked honestly confused.
"Food fucking poisoning!" Mario snapped.
"Oh that? You think that did anything! *laughs* No, when you were spoken to by Kikki we had to act fast."
"Who the hell is Kikki!" Mario screamed.
"Secret!"
"I think you two should just recalculate your routes so you don't cross paths again," Mewtwo advises but he was ignored.
"I thought you would be angry about me not healing Kirby despite everything."
"I hate you!"
"We already established that," Krad says and realised that it would be safe to leave.
Krad starts to walk away. "Hey! Don't you go!" Mario screamed wanting to yell out everything he's felt at Krad. Krad gave a mocking salute and utilised his newly bought teleporter to teleport away.
"Would you look at the time," Mewtwo says making an electric clock appear near Mario and himself, "almost time for Omochao to visit you lot for the last time today, I'd advise attending unless you want to get in trouble."
"How would I fucking get there!" Mario retorted, still mad.
"Like this," Mewtwo says and with a simple finger waving motion made Mario warp to the Asylum of the Insane.

^6:32 PM - Asylum of the Insane | Meeting Room^
Mario appeared with a bright flash next to Peach.
"Hi Mario?" Peach starts but decides not to ask.
"Where have you been?" Zelda demanded.
"Mopping," Mario mumbled and sat down at his usual spot.
"You mean moping," Bowser jests, snickering a bit.
"Earning easy Prim," Mario corrects.
"Whoa, so you think you'll reach twenty thousand before I do? Oh wait! Already have!" Bowser starts laughing and some people stared at him.
"Excuse me Bowser, but how have you managed to reach such a sum of Prim in so little time?" Keith asked.
"Team work!" Bowser shouts fist pumping the air.
"Yay! Team work!" Popo and Nana shout.
"Why do we even keep those two here?" DK mumbled.
"Because if we had a choice in staying I would be fucking gone!" Zelda answered.
"Hey everyone!" Omochao shouts flying in.
"Wait! I haven't ate anything!" Mario complains.
"Then you should get here on time like the rest of us!" Falco snapped.
"Hey that's my job!" Mason growled glaring at Falco.
"You snooze you lose!" Falco jests. He then received an arc of electricity to the face.
"Anyway! The available events are sixteen and twenty eight!"
"Let me guess, one of them is a Kirby event," Captain Falcon says rolling his eyes.
"Yep, both are in fact!" Captain Falcon made a sort of gasping noise at this and worriedly looked at Kirby while other people glared at him. "So who wishes to try it?"
"I thought you said only Kirby can do it?" Ness says confused.
"I never said anything of the such, I said they are both Kirby events. Not Kirby specific events but events about Kirby."
"Oh okay," Ness says but quickly adds; "not saying okay to trying it though!"
"Explain it," DK orders.
"The event is named Puffballs Unite and in it you face against fourteen clones of Kirby each of them being a mixed clone of Kirby and one of you lot, the fourteen are all different and each are at a level three intelligence, they all have one life and whoever attempts this has one!"
"So we went from ten to three?" Ness says.
"Ten?" Mario repeated confused.
"Mario! Greetings!" Omochao says.
"Um, hi?"
"Why does he get special hellos when I'm always the one waving!" Link yells smashing his. . . head against his shield.
"Because Mario has somehow wagged the last two events!"
"Stop all this irrelevant chitchat and start the event!" Keith orders, his voice sounding polite despite his rudeness.
"I'll go," Captain Falcon says.
"Why you?" Yoshi asked.
"Because you've all seen what I can do to Kirby."
"Alright then, go splatter some puffers!" Dark Link shouts.
"Also," Captain Falcon starts.
"You want to be the one who earns Kirby back I'm guessing, how pitifully stupid," Mason says.
"Yes, and I have a feeling that-"
"Kirby cannot be restored like that," Keith sternly interrupts.
"Heck not?" Falco yelled, he didn't care for whoever Kirby was but wanted to argue for amusement.
"Kirby is dead, not taken or trapped. You'll need a miracle doctor to be able to fix him up."
"Shit," Captain Falcon says.
"I thought you didn't like using words like that in front of the kiddies!" Bowser points out.
"Alright, start the event," Captain Falcon says sounding very depressed.

^Green Greens^
Captain Falcon appeared on a small island with a huge tree on it. Connected to the island were three small yellow blocks that connected to other islands. One on the right and one on the left of the tree island. The middle island was the biggest and had two small rectangular platforms that levitated in the air, for some reason these platforms were holographic on the bottom and solid on the top. The huge tree also was notable because it had apples, and a face but that isn't important because it won't be the cause of Captain Falcon's second failure.
"Hey? Where are the Kirbies?" Captain Falcon asked looking around.
"Prepare to face off against the Kirby horde!" A voice says. "In this battle our prisoner will face off against one Kirby at a time until they defeat four of them, then they face two at a time until only six are left where they will face three at a time!" The voice says sounding completely different to what it originally sounded like.
"Lee? Is that you?" Yoshi asked from somewhere.
"Almost forgot! It's not at once but in sets, so if you are fighting three and [voice changes] one goes bye-bye the other won't come until the other two are down!"
"That must get annoying when you try picking up girls," Bowser says referring to Lee's voice.
"Not interested in that stuff luckily, but moving back on subject! Are you ready Captain Falcon?" Lee asked
"Y-"
"GOOD!" Lee boomed. "[really fast] READY! SET! GO GO GO GO GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Lee screamed and a single Kirby appeared on a spawn platform and landed down next to Captain Falcon.
"Simple enough," Captain Falcon says and kicked at the Kirby, the Kirby was kicked off the edge.
"ONE DOWN! Will he be able to make it?" Lee yelled.
"You enjoying yourself are you?" Captain Falcon asked as another Kirby fell. This one actually looked different. "what gives with the last one being normal?"
"Oh, well it was a Kirby mixed with a Kirby, slight mishap," Lee says as Captain Falcon picked up the defenceless Kirby and threw it into the red mist. "TWO DOWN! HE IS ON FIRE!" Another Kirby appeared and Captain Falcon did the exact same thing.
"THAT WAS LIKE, HIS THIRD ONE IN A ROW! THIS GUY IS DA MAN!" Lee yells. Another appeared and Captain Falcon picked up and walked to the edge of the island. Suddenly the Kirby flashed like crazy and electricity circuited through Captain Falcon's suit paralysing him and making him and the Kirby fall off into the red mist.

"You lost," Omochao states.
"That's so boring!" Captain Falcon complains.
"Really?" Lee asked dropping down from the ceiling, which was quite hard considering his long arms and legs. (He didn't have them shortened) Lee lands atop of multiple people and they get caught under his long arms and legs. "How's 'bout this for a challenge!" Lee yells and clicked his fingers, Omochao's eyes flash.
"Event details changed! Kirbies now set to level six intelligence with an attribution of Nigh-Godmode that allows them to withstand even the deadly Falcon Punch! Untested though!" Omochao states.
"Um, mind undoing that Lee?" Captain Falcon asked.
"Well, the event would be sucky if I did, enjoy what you deserve you heartless badword!" Lee shouts.
"So how'd you come to the conclusion they would live a Falcon Punch?" Captain Falcon asked.
"Well, I used Samachu to test a Power Bomb on a Nigh-Godmode attributed clone and it survived."
"Saying Power Bombs are stronger than my mighty punch!"
"Yes, now farewell!" Lee says and jumped off all the trapped people, having forgot he was inside the mansion he slammed into the roof and smashed through all three floors of the mansion plus the attic before moving too high for anyone to properly see.
"He really has too much free time," Keith randomly states.
"Samachu?" Mario repeated.
"Just a clone of Pichu and I," Samus informs.
"That's not me!" Mason yelled.
"Pikachu, doesn't matter what it gets called," Samus corrects herself.
"Do you wish to try again?" Omochao asked.
"I would wish it to be the normal event-"
"It is the normal event, I only allow the normal event."
"I meant the original event."
"That event is a Mario only event." Captain Falcon sighs knowing that he can't win.
"Start the event."
"Mario only, what don't you get about that?"
"I meant the event I did before!" Captain Falcon yelled finally angry.

^Green Greens^
Captain Falcon appeared at the middle Island and heard some quiet snickering.
"Here he is everybody!" Lee starts.
"Shut up Lee! Nobody is amused!" Captain Falcon yelled as a Kirby/Kirby clone landed down. Captain Falcon dashed forward and grabbed the clone. He threw it off the island and awaited the next one.
"You know, this makes for a very boring event," Lee says as a Kirby/Pikachu clone appeared. The clone flicked its pink tail over its back and a bolt of lightning flew at Captain Falcon, who luckily jumped aside. "I haven't even had the chance to explain the Yellow Blocks," Lee sadly continues as Captain Falcon used the tree to dodge the deadly electricity.
"I thought this was the third clone?" Captain Falcon yelled.
"Eh, why bother keeping the order. It'll all just strain the author's mind to keep track of it all. Heck he may even make a fifth text document just to remember it all."
"Not listening!" Captain Falcon yells and narrowly avoids being shocked by Kirby/Pikachu.
"You really need to learn to tone him out," Falco explains.
"Maybe I should make a clone of myself," Lee mumbled forgetting that it was speaking near a loud speaker. Captain Falcon manages to make his way behind the clone and Falcon Punches it. The clone flew into the tree unharmed. Captain Falcon dashes forward abusing his speed and kicked the clone sideways and off the island.
Another Kirby appeared, this one had Link's (or Dark Link's) ears and hoodies. The clone pulled a bow from its MNEP (magically non-existent pocket) and armed it. Captain Falcon dashed at it and swiftly dodged an arrow as he reached the clone. He picks up the clone by the hoodie and screams. The clone landed down unharmed and used a sword to stab at Captain Falcon's legs.
"What's the matter?" Lee asked as Captain Falcon jumped aside to avoid being slashed at.
"The hoods organic-key!"
"Why wouldn't it be? It is a clone after all."
"But-" Captain Falcon shuts up to dodge an arrow.
"Hey Falcon, not wanting to help but isn't your armour strong enough to withstand arrows and the such?" Mason asked.
"Yeah why?" Captain Falcon hid behind the tree again.
"Use your brain you fucking re-"
"No need to use that word Mason!" Bowser quickly interrupts. Captain Falcon waits behind the tree for the clone to circle around it and once it does he dashes towards it. The clone fired an arrow at Captain Falcon's leg and it bounced off like they don't do in real life.
"My my, isn't that brave," Lee states as Captain Falcon picks up the Kirby/Link and throws it off the ledge. Another clone appears having very little added features. Captain Falcon ran to the clone and picked them up. He dangled it over the edge but didn't drop it.
"What's this a clone of?"
"For fucks sake does it mat-" Falco starts.
"That's a clone of Samus."
"Really?"
"Yeah, but I don't have any actual Samus clones so it kind of is a mix between nothing and Kirby. [short silence] Meaning it can't move or do anything because it thinks it doesn't exist, like a glitch if you must." Captain Falcon just drops it. Two Kirby clones appear, one was of Mario and the other of Peach. "Now I'll use my clone override tool to do this!" Lee shouts and the Mario clone throws the Peach clone off the ledge.
"Um. . . thanks?" Captain Falcon starts.
"Whoa Lee. . . just whoa," Mario depressingly mumbles. The Mario clone then spins around before suiciding.
"I thought the whole idea of changing the event was to make it harder," DK states.
"Just having some fun, don't tell the others." A large 'furry' clone appears alongside a large clone with a spikey shell-shaped back. The DK clone ran towards Captain Falcon and punched him into the air. Captain Falcon landed down onto the right island and stood up slowly. Bowser/Kirby ran to the edge of the main island and breathed a huge cloud of fire at Captain Falcon, none of it reached but it burnt away the three yellow blocks.
"Almost forgot!" Lee starts and suddenly blocks start to slowly drop from above the spot they normally are at. (great description) DK/Kirby jumps across onto the left island and Captain Falcon quickly goes into a fighting pose for no real reason. The clone swung back its arm and Captain Falcon took the chance to Falcon Punch it. . . it didn't even flinch. Oh no what now? DK/Kirby punched Captain Falcon's head and the racer groaned in pain as he was knocked over.
"Looks like that hurt," Lee starts up again. Get up, come on get up. Captain Falcon just laid there with a dazed look on his face. The Bowser clone makes a loud roar and stepped back a bit, then it lunged forward through the air and, got hit by a bomb block instantly KO-ing it. What was that? Must get up. . . damn laziness. . . DK looks behind itself and stares at the now missing Bowser/Kirby clone. My head hurts. . . Captain Falcon's right hand twitched and he slowly and loudly stood up.
"Anyone got some painkillers?"
"I'm sure Crazy Hand does, and by the way, you just [voice change] alerted the clone you're up." The DK/Kirby clone spun around and Captain Falcon punched at it. It tanked the hit and grabbed Captain Falcon with its right hand. Captain Falcon slapped the clones arm doing nothing at all. The clone spun around and threw Captain Falcon not off into the red mist but into the large tree. Captain Falcon smashed into it causing apples to fall down onto the ground with him. The clone jumped across the gap and landed at Captain Falcon's head.
"Too bad it doesn't jump longer," Lee jests as Captain Falcon forced himself up with a worried expression. (his mouth is visible under his visor for those who don't know) The DK/Kirby clone punched at Captain Falcon and knocked him into the tree again. Captain Falcon tries to move aside but the clone grabbed him with its huge hand. Damn it's fast! Captain Falcon tried to twirl around and to his surprise the clone let go. "How graceful! He truly should start a dancing career!" Captain Falcon stops spinning and lost his footing in his right foot. He stumbled over and landed on his side at the very edge of the middle island. (The back of it)
What to do what to do! Captain Falcon jumped upright and quickly looked at the clone as it ran to him. Dodge jump dodge jump! Captain Falcon looked frantically left and right as the clone punched at him, he fell off the edge but grabbed onto a root that was sticking out from under the island. The clone noticed this and jumped down after him. Captain Falcon spotted another root so he grabs that one before touching a button of his visor, a small laser beamed out and cut the root he was first holding. The DK/Kirby clone grabs the root as it falls down into the red mist.
"How long have you had that?" DK asked.
"A long time."
"May I ask why?" DK asked.
"You just did you idiot," Mason interrupts.
"Just so you know, the next clones are of Fallow Falco, Marvellous Mario and Naught Nana," Lee informs Captain Falcon.
"Hasn't Mario already had a clone?" Yoshi asked.
"Well that was mighty rude of you, they are my clones and I can do whatever I want with them!" Lee yells, sounding not at all offended. The three clones wander around on the middle island searching for Captain Falcon, who was still hanging onto a root from the tree.
"Come on Blue Falcon!" Captain Falcon yells clicking his fingers and letting go of the root, he then fell down into the red mist.

^Asylum of the Insane^
"Well that was stupid," Mason says as everyone appeared back.
"What did you expect to happen?" Zelda yelled as Omochao told Captain Falcon that he failed.
"Well, I expected my awesome Blue Falcon to fly under me and save me."
"And how would this bird manage to get there?" Zelda growled.
"By using its time and space warp device to warp through space to me."
"Time and Space?"
"Yeah, well not really. . . it can't warp through time, just space."
"Now isn't that much more fun Cappy?" Lee asked after landed atop of multiple people.
"Where do you come from?" Falco asked backing away from Peach, who was squished under Lee.
"Twin Falls, Idaho," Lee answers as he stood up. As Lee stood up his limps very quickly got a lot shorter. The people who were under him quickly move away.
"I meant when you fall down onto us all the time," Falco growls.
"Doesn't take a genius to figure this one out," Lee snarks and except from getting glared at by Falco got no response. "For all you simple minded people I meant above you, now carry on with your missions, events and whatnot."
"Eight more fails and-" Zelda starts.
"But I had my fun, here have your overly weak event!" Lee shouts for no reason (shouting for no reason, not his actual speech) and Omochao's eyes flash red again.
"Event details changed," Omochao states robotically.
"But just think, the event had so much potential, it could have even lasted another five thousand words,"
"Is that some kind of inside joke?" Falco asked.
"More like an outside one," Mason mumbled quiet enough to not be heard by anyone except; Bowser (was next to him), Samus (Varia suit enhanced hearing), Lee (better hearing) and Omochao.
"Explaining jokes makes them not funny," Lee explains. "Although that is the price of having idiots around, funny but you ruin jokes explaining them."
"What was that!" Falco yelled shooting at Lee. The electric bullet ripped a hole right through Lee's right knee.
"Oh dear me, that kind of hurt. . . wait, no it didn't."
"Are you seriously getting paid to do this Lee?" Keith asked.
"Are you seriously getting paid to be so serene?"
"N-"
"Because if so!" Lee interrupts, "ya failen' mightily."
"Omochao, start the event," Captain Falcon demands, his head too saw to put up with the arguing.
"Event starting!" Omochao announces.

^Green Greens^
Captain Falcon appeared at the middle island again and saw a Kirby land down, this one looked to be a mix between Kirby and Mario. Captain Falcon dashed forward but the clone quickly back-flipped up onto the huge tree. From there the Kirby/Mario clone started to throw fireballs down at Captain Falcon.
"Oh my, I think I may have failed to change the level six intelligence," Lee innocently states followed by some crazed laughter.
"Like hell you did!" Captain Falcon yelled as he used his visor laser to shoot at Mario/Kirby. The first laser shot pierced through the clone's right leg ripping a clean hole right through. The clone lost balance and fell off the tree. Captain Falcon jumped up into the air and made a pose that for some reason made him momentarily defy gravity. "FALLLLCOOOOON KICK!" Captain Falcon's whole lower body caught on fire and he meteor-ed through the air and smashed into the Mario/Kirby clone. The two broke through the ground and plummeted into the red mist.

^Asylum of the Insane^
"You failed," Omochao states.
"I miss the long versions," Link states.
"Um. . . Falcon Kick?" Lee asked dropping once again down from above, this time not crushing anybody.
"What of it?" Captain Falcon asked.
"Is it a new version of the punch?"
"Nope, just a more aerial version, now fix the event!"
"No can do, I have a life to tend to!" Lee shouts and after a brief second of being posed to jump stopped. "Almost forgot!" A black, Slenderman-like tentacle extracts from Lee's back and fires a weird gun at the somewhat broken ceiling. A portal of sorts opens up and Lee jumps easily up into it. The portal then closes.
"So," Peach starts but waits for people to look at her before continuing, "if Lee didn't change the level six back does that mean god mode is off?"
"It is," Keith answers. "I highly regret having to do this considering your abnormal tendencies with Omochao's time but I must take leave and report some things." And with that Keith left the room.
"Probably Lee wasting his time," Mason says but quickly realised he was being too friendly.
"Alright Omochao! Start the event again!" Captain Falcon demands.

^Roughly an hour later - Azure Falls | North Quadrant^
Lee was walking through a metal corridor minding his own business when he heard a shout, "Lee!"
"Oh is that you Ma-" Lee starts turning to face Master Hand when he was cut off by Master Hand slamming into him and flying straight into a hard metal wall. Said wall surprisingly survives. "Ahh! James what are you doing?" Lee screamed worriedly as Master Hand held him pressed up against the wall with his hidden eye visible and huge.
"Lee!" Master Hand shouts over Lee's squabbling, "for the last time! Do! Not! Change! MY! FUCKING! PLANS! [very short pause] UNDERSTAND!" Master Hand screamed furiously.
"James! Please settle down before you hurt someone! Most likely yours truly!" Lee pleads worriedly.
"LEAVE MY PLANS ALONE!" Master Hand screamed as he spun around and threw Lee into another wall, Lee however had quickly detracted his legs and arms to a proper length and latched onto the wall safely. He then scurried across the wall and dropped down upright some ten metres away from Master Hand.
"What is wrong with you? Calm down already!" Lee yelled.
"I've warned you multiple times to not mess with my stuff! I am the boss here and you are just shit for hire!" Master Hand screamed.
"Shit for hire eh? Great economy we have 'ere," Lee jokes.
"You screw around with my plans again and I'll have the same thing done to you as to Sonic!"
"Sonic?" Lee starts confused wondering how he knew Sonic but quickly realises who he actually meant. "The janitor? Oh no I don't even know what happened to him!" Lee wails in an obviously fake scared tone.
"I killed him!" Is that so? I thought he left on his own accord.
"Really?" Lee asked smiling devilishly. "I would hate for that to happen so maybe I should just pull out all my support in this and-"
"No Lee wait!" Master Hand yells not wanting to lose the clones. "I need you! No, we need you!"
"Alright you've persuaded me," Lee laughs as he walks towards Master Hand. After he got close enough he held out his still longish arms. "Hug for forgiveness?"
"Get lost Lee, you have work to do!" Master Hand yelled and flew off using his special skin to phase through the otherwise solid walls.
"Oh Escalus is going to love hearing about this! Oh 'my plans my plans! Plee-ease don't change my precious plans!' Ha! How idiotic to such an amusmental level! Such brilience in the form of dumb!" Lee babbled as he walked away.

^(roughly) One hour before - Green Greens^
Captain Falcon appeared at Green Greens again and waited for the Kirby to spawn. Once it did he rushed to it and kicked it off before it could move.
"Must you always abuse your speeds?" Mason growled annoyed at how painless things are.
"Why shouldn't I?" Captain Falcon starts as he knocked another unsuspecting Kirby clone off. "you do."
"OOooh! Burn!" Link. . . 'ohs'?
"Shut up Link!" Mason yelled as a Captain Falcon/Kirby clone appeared. This time however the clone dodged Captain Falcon and quickly dashed at him. Captain Falcon jumped to avoid the shorter him's punches. While in the air Captain Falcon quickly body slams down onto the clone. The clone struggles to get out from under the real Captain Falcon but fails to do so. Captain Falcon moved positions so he was able to repeatedly punch the clones face over and over and. . . over.
"Just finish it off already," Zelda snapped after only a few seconds of punching.
"He probably likes punching himself, I do," Link states.
"And trust me, it hurts!" Dark Link assures.
"Too bad their blood's green or I could pretend he's red!" Captain Falcon shouts as he punched the now green blood covered clone.
"What would that change?" DK asked.
"How savage things are," Yoshi guesses before Captain Falcon could answer.
"To- No Yoshi. To make him er, it look like Blood Falcon so I could get some much needed reven-" Captain Falcon was shoved off the clone. The clone jumped up and threw a few bloody punches at Captain Falcon. Captain Falcon was hit by all of them and stumbled back. He stepped onto a yellow block and suddenly a loud 'ding' rang. Yellow blocks then begin to rain down from the sky, but only above their allocated areas.
"Felkcun!" The clone growled, its voice corrupt and also muffled (by the blood).
"Yes?" Captain Falcon asked backing off until he was off the three blocks and onto the left island.
The bloody (and short) clone stomped onto a yellow block, "Clones have feelings too. [short pause] that hurt!" And with that the clone charged at Captain Falcon but a small laser popped the blocks it was standing on making it fall into the red mist.
"You lot are right, why didn't I use this earlier!" Captain Falcon exclaims happily.
"Is that three or four down?"
"Don't know," Captain Falcon responded.
"Then why answer you idiot!" Zelda yelled.
"Because the question was directed at him you moron!" Mason snapped.
"Er, thanks. . . Mason?" Captain Falcon awkwardly (not proper term I know) replied.
"That was three, I've been counting!" Ness answers as another clone appeared, this one of Mario/Kirby. The clone cupped its hands together and, was kicked off the ledge by Captain Falcon. "That makes four!"
"We can count!" Mason yells.
"Like before?" Ness snapped back.
"You wanting to start something?" Mason yelled.
"Er! No!" Ness quickly responded.
"Good!" As this argument was going on two clones had appeared and were kicked off like the rest. Clones seven and eight appeared. Clone seven was of Kirby/Peach and clone eight was of Kirby/Zelda. Captain Falcon dashed at the Peach clone but quickly dived aside to avoid a blast of magic, said magic blast exploded against the ground harming nothing important.
Captain Falcon kicked the Peach clone off and spun around to face the Zelda clone. The clone jumped up and landed on the right floating platform. "Hey!" Captain Falcon shouts looking away, "I don't want to perve on you!" (referring to the cloned organic dress)
"WHY WOULD YOU EVEN BRING THAT UP THEN!" Zelda screamed.
"I like being invisible," Popo randomly states as the Zelda clone threw balls of explosive magic at Captain Falcon. Captain Falcon quickly hid behind the tree and after a few bombardments was hit on the head by something. The 'thing' fell onto the ground near Captain Falcon's feet.
"Hey! An apple!" Captain Falcon says and picked up the apple.
"Da da da da daa da da da da da da daaaaaah! Apple acquired!" Link randomly hums.
"Metroid?" Dark Link asked.
"Where?" Samus quickly asked. Captain Falcon, instead of eating the apple, leaned around the tree and pift/piffed (threw) the apple at the Zelda/Kirby clone. He hit its head and the clone fell back and painfully onto their back on the main island. Captain Falcon ran around the tree and kicked the clone off. Before falling into the red mist a the Kirby/Peach clone flew under the Kirby/Zelda clone and took it up onto the right island.
"I forgot she could fly. Why didn't anyone tell me she was still alive?" Captain Falcon asks his invisible audience.
"That would be cheat-" Link starts.
"Nice," Mason interrupts. (Making it, for you simple minded people: That would be nice)
The Kirby/Zelda clone forms a magical orb and throws it at Captain Falcon. The orb missed because it hit a falling yellow block. Captain Falcon presses his helmet and a laser beams out at the Zelda/Kirby clone. The clone jumps aside to avoid it (because at level six intelligence they're smart enough to dodge) and ended up jumping off the island and into the red mist. The Kirby/Peach clone flies down to save it but ended up flying into the red mist too.
Clones nine, ten and eleven then appear. They were Kirby/Bowser, Kirby/Varia Suit and Kirby/Falco respectively.
"Er um, is this thing on?" Hiro asks.
"Hear ya loud and clear buddy," Captain Falcon states quickly hiding behind a tree to avoid the clones.
"Are the yellow blocks falling?" Hiro asked. (he isn't invisible like Lee was, he's someplace else[meaning he can't see if they are or aren't])
"What do you think!" Zelda yelled.
"I best turn them on," Hiro states and turned them on. A 'clicking' noise was heard not when he turned them on but when he turned his communications off. The sky then shot out arcs of lightning as it malfunctioned and stopped making yellow blocks. The Varia Suit clone stalked around the tree and spotted Captain Falcon.
"Found him!" It yelled in a disgruntled voice. It fired a charged Power Beam shot at Captain Falcon but missed due to him climbing up the tree. The Varia Suit clone swapped to the Plasma Beam and began firing at the tree's stump. The Bowser clone joins in by breathing fire on the tree. The Falco clone, being not informed of the obvious plan climbed up the tree. Varia Suit clone and Bowser clone were standing next to each over now. Captain Falcon and the Falco clone had went to the very top of the tree and were now shielded from view by the thick branches and leaves. A face appeared on the tree where the two clones were burning.
"HEY! I'm the tree prop and I don't like being burnt!" The tree yelled and blew a huge gust of wind at the two clones, this sent them flying off the stage into the red mist. Captain Falcon was sitting on a branch hoping to wait the clones out when a laser-like bullet hit his protected chest. Hm? Captain Falcon looked down and saw Falco climbing the branches towards him. Captain Falcon pressed for his laser and fired it at the branch the clone was jumping to, the branch broke and sent Falco falling, falling miraculously into the earlier made hole from the Falcon Kick.
The next, and final, three clones appeared. They were Kirby/Yoshi, Kirby/Popo and Kirby/Nana. The Ice Climber clones, somehow knowing where Captain Falcon was, began climbing the burning tree with ease. The Yoshi clone stood dumbfounded at the situation, having no clue to where Captain Falcon was. With a loud noise that can be whatever the readers want it to be the tree's trunk broke and toppled the tree over. Captain Falcon and the clones screamed as it smashed down onto the block bridge connected the right island and the middle one. Captain Falcon was crushed under some branches on the right island while the Ice Climbers fell into the red mist making another cheap death. Because of the tree's collapse the sky blasted out lightning and the blocks began falling again, this time anywhere and having a higher average of bomb blocks. The Yoshi clone ran out of the way of falling blocks while Captain Falcon clawed at the hard dirty ground to try freeing himself from his imprisonment. Captain Falcon looked up at a bomb block falling towards his head so he lasers it. Another bomb block passed by the exploded one and lands somewhere behind Captain Falcon, the blast broke the tree and freed Captain falcon. Captain Falcon stood up and spun around to face the last clone left, who had somehow made it to the left island while avoiding falling blocks.
"It's like Tetris Escape on Minecraft!" Ness exclaims sounding very amused and shocked. The Yoshi/Kirby clone flicks out its long tongue and eats a bomb block, it however didn't actually swallow it and instead spat it towards Captain Falcon. Captain Falcon jumped up onto the tree and ran across it as bombs rained down onto the stage. He lasers at the last clone but it sidesteps. The clone spits another block, this time not explosive, at Captain Falcon. Captain Falcon jumped aside and fell down his hole. Ahh! Grab it! Captain Falcon grabbed a tree root and felt it slip/rip through the ground because of there being no tree to keep it in place. Captain Falcon made a sort of screaming sound until the root stopped falling and made a sudden jolt as it got caught on something. Captain Falcon looked up amazed at his luck, he was only centre meters above the red mist. Captain Falcon starts climbing but because he was so low the Kirby/Yoshi clone could see him from the left island, the clone quickly starts spitting blocks at him. An explosive block hits the root and causes an explosion, the root slips lower a bit but Captain Falcon keeps climbing.
"This is turning out to be entertaining," Mason states.
"For who?" Captain Falcon screams as he climbed higher. Suddenly (yes overused) he vanished.

^Asylum of the Insane^
"Wait, did I lose?" Captain Falcon asked looking at Omochao.
"Congradulations, you won!"
"Yeah! Fist pump!" Captain Falcon yells 'fist pumping' the air. "But seriously, how?"
"I blew up," Yoshi answers.
"Again, how?"
"By a fucking bomb cube you idiot!" Mason yells.
"Bomb Block," Ness quietly mumbles.
"I heard that!" Mason yells striking out at Ness.
While the two fought (or, as Ness ran around the table in hopes of outrunning the extremely faster Mason) DK explained to Captain Falcon how he won. "As you were climbing up the vine the clone tried to spit another bomb block at you but it exploded after hitting the clone's tooth."
"So, I got lucky for once," Captain Falcon sums up.
"For once! You're one of the most luckiest persons here!" Zelda yelled.
"Somehow, that just sounds grammatically wrong," DK says.
"Why is every fucking one concerned about fucking grammar!" Zelda boomed as Omochao flew away.
"That's aside the point," Samus starts making some people look at her, most were surprised she was speaking. "What is relevant is this," Samus continued, "We're finally up to the event that Ganondorf wants us to be at!"
"Oh yeah," Zelda mumbles.
"Ganondorf? The staff member?" Mario asked.
"No, Link's friend!" Bowser answers.
"Not exactly friend, more like rival," Zelda corrects.
"Link has a rival?" Falco questions.
"That's a stupid question considering I just named his rival," Zelda replied angrily.
"Must be an idiot then," Falco assumes.
"He's the most powerful entity to exist!" Zelda yelled.
"Then why does he mob the floors with me sometimes?" Mario asked but the others kept talking without him. (The other people who haven't spoke have either left or busy talking amongst themselves) "Hello!" Mario yelled, "Why does he mop with me!"
"You know we just tune you out now right?" Falco asked looking at Mario.
"Finally someone answered, so why-" Mario stops after seeing Falco look away and continue talking to the others.
"But wasn't it thirty?" Zelda asked.
"Close enough," Bowser grumbled. "It'll probably be a hard one!" DK says. "Could involve Link and everyone knows how that ends!" Falco adds.
"Might not." Bowser responds. "Link's not that bad." DK reassures. "How'd you even hear about this?" Falco asked.
"Probably will." Falco groaned. "Trust me, he somehow always beats him!" Zelda somewhat angrily states. (More annoyed)
"Hello?" Mario mumbles as the group kept talking over each other.
"And this Mario," Samus begins (she wasn't blabbing with the others anymore), "is why I don't talk to them." (referring to them talking over each other)

Time for the Chapter Stats:

Bowser: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: 1. Events Attempted: 4. Events Won: 3. Events Lost: 1. Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki:

Captain Falcon: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: 3. Events Attempted: 5. Events Won: 2. Events Lost: 3. Team Kills: 1. Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Yes*. Knows of Kikki: Yes.

DK: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: 5. Events Won: 1. Events Lost: 4. Team Kills: Team Defeats: 1. Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki: Yes*.

Dr Mario: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: Events Won: Events Lost: Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki:

Falco: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: 1. Events Won: 1. Events Lost: Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki:

Fox: Member of Staff: Yes*. Staff Kills: 1. Clone Kills: 3. Events Attempted: 3. Events Won: 2. Events Lost: 1. Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Yes. Knows of Kikki: Yes.

Ganondorf: Member of Staff: Undef. Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: Events Won: Events Lost: Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: 1. Hated by Escalus: Yes. Knows of Kikki:

Jigglypuff: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: Events Won: Events Lost: Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki:

Kirby: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: 1. Events Attempted: 3. Events Won: 1. Events Lost: 2. Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki:

Link: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: 7. Events Attempted: 4. Events Won: 3. Events Lost: 1. Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki: Yes.

Luigi: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: Events Won: Events Lost: Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: 1. Hated by Escalus: Yes. Knows of Kikki:

Mario: Member of Staff: Yes*. Staff Kills: Clone Kills: 1. Events Attempted: 10. Events Won: 3. Events Lost: 7. Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: 2. Hated by Escalus: Yes. Knows of Kikki: Yes.

Marth: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: Events Won: Events Lost: Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki:

Mewtwo: Member of Staff: Yes. Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: Events Won: Events Lost: Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: 3. Hated by Escalus: Yes. Knows of Kikki: Yes.

Mr Game & Watch: Member of Staff: Disbanded. Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: Events Won: Events Lost: Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Yes. Knows of Kikki: Yes.

Nana: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: 2. Events Won: 1. Events Lost: 1. Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki:

Ness: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: 2. Events Won: 1. Events Lost: 1. Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki:

Peach: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: 2. Events Won: 2. Events Lost: Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki:

Pichu: Member of Staff: Undef. Staff Kills: Clone Kills: 130. Events Attempted: 3. Events Won: 3. Events Lost: Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: 1. Hated by Escalus: Yes*. Knows of Kikki: Yes.

Pikachu: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: 4. Events Attempted: 2. Events Won: Events Lost: 2. Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki:

Popo: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: 2. Events Won: 1. Events Lost: 1. Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki:

Roy: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: Events Won: Events Lost: Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: 1. Hated by Escalus: Yes. Knows of Kikki:

Samus: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: 1. Clone Kills: 24. Events Attempted: 12. Events Won: 4. Events Lost: 8. Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Yes. Knows of Kikki: Yes.

Yoshi: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: 1. Clone Kills: 6. Events Attempted: 2. Events Won: 2. Events Lost: Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Yes. Knows of Kikki: Yes.

Young Link: Member of Staff: Undef. Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: 1. Events Won: 1. Events Lost: Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Knows of Kikki:

Zelda: Member of Staff: Staff Kills: Clone Kills: Events Attempted: 2. Events Won: Events Lost: 2. Team Kills: Team Defeats: Times in VOID: Hated by Escalus: Yes*. Knows of Kikki: