Chapter 191

Here I stand with my everlasting love

The house was exactly as she had left it four days earlier; the pillar candles were strategically placed around the room and she left a dusting of rose petals from the entrance into the living room and up the stairs to the bedroom. It was as romantic a scene as she had ever created and all she needed now, having lit the near 100 candles, was the man she loved.

She pulled the door shut behind her, climbed into the car and headed back to the loft. The time for waiting was through.

****
Patrick looked at her askance as she pulled out the black scarf and moved to tie it around his eyes.

"Robin, I don't think your car is big enough for us to play in," he said with a sly smile.

"Such a comedian" she deadpanned as she tied the scarf. "I just figured you'd prefer not to watch me drive considering you always say that I'm a bad driver."

"You are" he muttered under his breath.

"Pardon?"

"Nothing"

"That's what I thought" she replied with a grin.

It was a short drive to the house and as they got closer, Robin's heart started to thump so loudly she was sure he would be able to hear it. She hadn't expected to be nervous, given how confident she was in his feelings for her and more importantly her feelings for him, but as they pulled into the driveway, her entire body felt shaky. A pang of regret stabbed at her as she realized just how painful her rejection at the house – of the house – had been for him. Not for the first time did she find herself wishing she was able to turn back the clock and take back some of what she had said.

She pulled open the passenger door and helped him to his feet. As she guided him up the stairs, she wondered if he had already figured out where they were; if he had, he certainly wasn't letting on. Leading him into the living room, she brought him to a stop and then, standing on her tip toes, removed the blindfold from his eyes.

Patrick blinked several times, his eyes adjusting to the light, as he looked around the room. It was the first time he had returned to the house since he had ended things with Robin and his stomach dropped just a little as those memories rose up.

"Wh-what's all this?" he asked nervously, rooted to his spot.

Robin inhaled deeply and smiled warmly at him. "This is a beautiful house" she said quietly. "It's big and roomy with lots of space for a family. The backyard is just begging for a swing set, a tree house or a fort. The basement has the makings of an amazing playroom and the bedrooms – well the master bedroom – they are just the type of space you would want to spend days in."

Jamming his hands in his pockets, he took one serrated breath after another. "What are you trying to say?" he asked.

It wasn't that he didn't understand where she was headed but he couldn't make any assumptions – not any longer. He needed to hear her say, out loud, what it was that she wanted. He couldn't afford to be wrong about her intentions.

Her tongue darted from her mouth and nervously licked her lips. In her head this scene had played out 100 times but now, standing before him, she realized none of those scenarios mattered – only this one did.

"I love you" she said simply. "I love you in ways that I did not know was possible and that has scared the crap out of me. I've…I've always been the smart one in my relationships or the strong one or the leader and that has allowed me to control almost everything. And when my heart was broken it gave me more reason to try and control everything around me but I have learned that love – true, deep, gravity-defying love – can't be controlled. It sweeps you up and pulls you where you are meant to be and the best you can do is hold on and trust that the landing will be soft."

The room glowed and Robin's rich, brown expressive eyes shone with love and hope. Patrick stared at her, unable to take his eyes away from her as he let her words wash over him.

"And so I'm standing here telling you that I don't want to control everything any more. I have been a prisoner to my fears for so long that I nearly let it cost me the greatest gift I have ever been given – you," she said hoarsely, as she pointed to him. "I want to be free – free to love you unabashedly, free to be a family with you built on love and respect and passion. I want to be free to dream of a future – a future with you and our children."

"Children?" he asked tentatively.

Robin nodded. "We have bedrooms to fill," she smiled tearfully. "I have never had anyone fight for me the way you have. From the very beginning you have fought to be in my life and pushed me to recognize that I deserve that – I deserve to be loved by you. And you deserve to be loved by me. I am a woman who was sure that love had passed me by and I had constructed my life in response to that. How little did I know that what I was building was on quicksand – the foundation I needed comes from sharing my life with you. And so I'm saying, in a rather long winded fashion" she joked quietly, "is that I want it all. I want the house – this house; I want our family, I want our future. I have no doubts, no reservations and no worries. You asked me a question a couple of months ago and I gave you an answer and extracted a promise that you would ask me again. I want you to know that when you're ready, when you're sure that you want to ask me again, I will have an answer for you."

The room fell quiet as Patrick stared at her. He smiled wondrously at her and pulling his hands from his pockets, slung them low on his hips. So moved by her declaration, his heart filled to the point of bursting, he was afraid to break the spell by speaking.

Feeling as though the world had stopped spinning as she waited for him to say something – say anything – Robin chewed on her bottom lip.

"Do you…..am I-"

Her sentence was left unfinished as he closed the gap between them and cupping her face, brought his mouth down on hers in a hungry, passionate kiss. She could have sworn she felt her feet leave the ground as his tongue swept inside her mouth tasting and teasing her. Robin wound her arms around his neck, holding on as her knees weakened from the kiss.

He guided her legs up and around his waist as he continued to kiss her, backing them into a wall for added support. Her fingers threaded through his hair as her lips started to swell from the pressure of his kiss. Leaning back, he stared at her breathlessly; his eyes were glassy with a mixture of love and desire and unable to help himself he placed a series of small staccato kisses against her lips.

Feeling his arousal growing against her, Robin smiled, somewhat shyly. "There's a bed"

"What?" he asked dumbfounded.

"Upstairs" she repeated, biting her bottom lip, "there's a bed."

It was all Patrick needed to hear. Pulling them from the wall, his mouth returned to hers and ravaged her with kisses. His tongue was insistent as it brushed against hers and Robin moaned loudly in response. Her hands pulled restlessly at the hem of his shirt trying to tug it over his head as they made their way to the staircase.

Feeling Robin slipping in his arms, he set her down against the stairs, peeling his shirt and tossing it over the banister. Her eyes danced with desire as she inhaled one ragged breath after another; reaching out she grabbed hold of his belt buckle and pulled him to her. Bracing his hands on either of side of her, he hovered just above his eyes smouldering as his hips brushed against hers.

Lifting her head she moved to kiss him and pouted as he ducked out of the way. He kissed her way down her body, over her dress, before kneeling in front of her. His hands trailed up and down her legs, teasing her thighs apart, before pushing her dress up. She shuddered as his knuckles grazed across her hot centre.

"You're wet" he rasped.

Robin nodded, almost not trusting herself to speak.

"These will have to come off" he told her as he peeled her black lace panties down her legs and throwing them over his shoulder. Leaning forward, he dropped a long, lingering kiss at the apex of her thighs.

"Patrick!" she squeaked, "what are you doing?"

"Tasting" he told her before he dragged his tongue along her sex.

"Aaaaah!" Robin cried out as his tongue dipped inside. Her legs started to shake as he covered her skin in hot kisses.

Frustrated by the barrier of her dress and suddenly overcome with a need to touch all of her, he pushed her dress up higher before finally getting it over her head. Quickly, he reached around her back and unhooked her bra, sending it to join the growing pile of clothes. Her nipples hardened and she moaned loudly as he closed his mouth around the tip, laving it with his tongue. Arching up from the hard wooden stair, she pushed her breast further into his mouth as she scratched her fingers along his chest. Her hips bucked as he traced the outline of her sex, teasing the bundle of nerves nestled at the top. She spread her legs wider in invitation but Patrick ignored her request, instead he continued to tease and touch and push her ever closer to the edge.

She mewled as Patrick switched to her other breast, biting playfully at the hardened peak.

"Jesus Patrick" she hissed.

She was desperate to cover him in kisses, to taste him, to free his erection from the confines of his jeans but she was incapable of keeping a though in her head as he assaulted all of her pleasure points. Her body was humming from his touch and she felt almost off balance from the rawness of her nerve endings. He brushed his cheek along hers as he nuzzled her neck before moving to the hollow of his throat where his tongue worked in small, deliberate circles.

Fumbling, her hands went in search of his belt as she clumsily undid it before turning her attention to his jeans. She dragged her fingertips along the outline of his arousal, straining dangerously against the denim and smiled as she felt him shudder.

Patrick stopped what he was doing as she finally pushed his pants over his hips, freeing him, and groaned as her hand wrapped around him and stroked his length.

"You're so hard" she told him throatily. "God, I love how you feel in my hands."

He jumped to his feet, moving away from her and kicked off his jeans. Bending down, he scooped her up in his arms, bounding up the stairs with urgency. She was teetering on the edge and bit down on his shoulder as he carried her through the bedroom door.

Laying her gently on the bed, he watched as she scooted back against the pillows, kneading her own breasts. "Don't leave me here by myself" she said, her eyes heavy lidded with desire.

"Show me what you want me to do" he commanded.

Robin's chest rose and fell as she stared at him. Dipping her hand between her legs she deftly moved her fingers about while their eyes remained locked on each other. "This" she panted, "I want you to do this…..and to be in here…."

Patrick jerked forward and crawled towards her on the bed. He paused, looking around for where he had left his jeans. Understanding what he was looking for, Robin reached over and pulled open the drawer on the nightstand, retrieving a condom. Tearing the packet open, she moved in front of him pushing him down against the bed. Placing the tip between her lips, she sheathed him with her mouth.

He grabbed the bed sheets, his eyes clenched shut as he felt the warmth from her mouth envelope him. He groaned as she straddled him, her hips undulating against his. He once again went in search of her mouth, needing to kiss her.

They moved around the bed, their bodies joined together as they hungrily reacquainted themselves. It had been weeks of passion and love denied and now they could not refuse it any longer. There was a flurry of limbs tangling, breath mingling and bodies touching. As the pleasure built, they pushed each other over the edge holding on to each other as though each was afraid to let go.

They collapsed on the bed, breathless and ragged. Patrick reached for Robin, tugging her to him as he dropped soft, loving kisses along her face. His hand swept across her belly, coming to rest on the side.

"I have just one question," he asked as his heart rate returned to normal.

"What's that?" she queried sleepily.

"When do we move in?"