I loved my home, full of the things I loved and defined me: my guitar sitting in the corner upon its stand, shelves surrounding it, full of my favourite books. My blood red laptop sat upon my desk in the study, inviting me into its loving warmth. Even though my heart filled with dread with what was going to happen, I was glad to be home after being on the road for so long: my mind drifted to the reason why I left.

I had overheard an argument between Castiel and another unknown angel, talking about an opening of another gate and the breaking of a seal being planned. They seemed to be fighting and the unknown angel's voice sounded familiar, like a sound within a dream. I hadn't thought about the question of his identity at the time, only of making sure the gate wasn't open and the seal was unbroken. The question of his identity played on my mind, distracting me for a moment of the problem of my self control. I felt a stabbing pain as the dark tried to take advantage of my distraction. I quickly suppressed it and grew angry at myself for not being strong enough. I needed to take my anger out on something; I was too unstable to hunt demons so I opted for beating up a punch bag, imaging the face of my unknown demonic father with every punch, feeling my life to be cursed.

After working up a sweat, I rushed into the shower to clean myself, scrubbing myself raw, hoping to get rid of my tainted skin. I changed into my favourite white tank top and my comfy grey tracksuit trousers, putting on my soft bathrobe on top and settling on the sofa to watch TV. I tried to pretend like nothing else in the world mattered. I looked at the clock and saw it was almost sunrise. I couldn't sleep so I settled to watch some good TV that I hadn't been able to see when demon hunting. I was starting to get into an old episode of Bones when I was rudely interrupted by none other than Castiel.

I tried ignoring him as I seriously couldn't control myself; I needed to calm down but him just not saying anything and waltzing into my home was making my blood boil. I physically began burning up and I had to remove my bathrobe for fear of fainting. The air of superiority around him fuelled my rage. I tried concentrating on my breathing and the screen ahead of me; I was close to snapping and demanding an explanation of him. I paused the show and turned around and then he finally spoke.

"Someone needs your help." Silence engulfed the air. I didn't know what to say, he knew I couldn't be controlled. I shouldn't be allowed out.

"They are after him. It is up to you whether you go out and protect him. If they get him, they would have a strong advantage over us. You choose whether he lives or dies at our hands."

I wasn't sure at what he was suggesting or his reasoning behind it. I couldn't be let out, I couldn't be trusted. I might give in and choose their side. But someone's life was in danger; I couldn't let them die because of my selfish reasons.

Whilst I was debating with myself, Castiel had disappeared. I got up and began pacing around the rooms, thinking. I barely registered as the room got darker around me. I suddenly couldn't breathe. My mind was going blank; I found it hard to focus on anything. I couldn't even think of how bad that situation could have been if I had been in a public place.

Suddenly a shadow emerged from the dark clouds and slowly approached me. Even in my dazed state, I could feel the evil radiating off him, filling the room and feeding the dark clouds that where blocking the morning sun. I slowly walked back and sought comfort in the solid security of the wall. I was cornered, I was confused, I could barely think straight. I didn't want to look at the shadow that held so much power over me but I couldn't turn my head away. I couldn't move. Panic gripped me. I didn't like being weak and trapped. It scared me to the core of my being. I felt weaker by the second, my legs were having trouble holding me up, my knees felt as though they were buckling beneath me but they didn't. I knew who was keeping me up and looking at it. I feared its power. The shadow soon became more defined, showing a shape of a human and then a man. He soon was too close for comfort. He finally stopped inches away from my face. He stared at me like examining goods at the market. His look made me shiver. I couldn't bring myself to think let alone to speak. He spoke one word, "Perfect", his voice was familiar but the thought was lost before I could grip on to it. I was having difficulty breathing; I was feeling dizzy and faint. His hand touched my shoulder, his touch burned but the pains soon faded into nothing as my brain didn't register it. His thumb traced a pattern on my shoulder. I was scared stiff and couldn't physically move, mentally my mind was scattered. Suddenly his thumb moved from my shoulder to my lips and before I could register what was happening he kissed me. It felt like boiling liquid burning my lips and throat, spreading around my body causing a lot of pain. My mind and body couldn't take it anymore and I collapsed.

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