Chapter 205

We are family

"Why does she need a middle name?" Patrick asked as he pulled the car into the driveway.

"How will she know we're angry with her if she doesn't have a middle name?" Robin replied. "Everyone knows the universal measurement of a parent's anger is directly related to whether or not they invoke the middle name."

Chuckling, he shook his head. "You're weird."

It had been eight days since Kathleen's arrival and after several batteries of tests for both mother and baby they finally got the okay to go home; Robin was nearly out of her skin with excitement. As her strength had slowly started to return so did her impatience and by the eighth day, she was talking about making an escape attempt if Kelly didn't release her. She still moved slowly but was less fatigued than she been .Mostly she was just anxious to be at home with her daughter.

Patrick opened the car door and helped Robin to her feet. She leaned against the car while he opened the backseat door and unbuckling the car seat, gently lifted Kathleen from the car.

"I want to carry her in" Robin said. "In my arms."

Smiling, Patrick placed the car seat on the ground and undid the straps. Picking her up, he passed her to Robin, his heart filled to bursting as she cradled their daughter in her arms. He hooked one arm through the car seat and slid the other around Robin as they walked through the front door of the house together.

"Welcome home Kathleen," Robin cooed, kissing her forehead.

Walking slowly, Robin headed for the living room and settled on the couch before unbundling her from her blanket. Leaning against the doorframe Patrick watched, with a wide smile on his face, as Robin covered their daughter in kisses. In the back of his mind there had been a small part of him worried that Robin would be slow to bond with Kathleen after her surgery but his worries had been completely unfounded. There was simply no mistaking the love she had for her and how excited she was to be a mother. There had been a small, almost unidentifiable shift in her since the baby was born. He couldn't quite explain it but it was as though she was at peace – like she was no longer fighting herself.

Feeling his eyes on her, Robin didn't even bother to look up but grinned. "Kathleen if your daddy keeps staring at us, his eyes are going to freeze up."

"I can't help he" he told her as he crossed the floor to join her, "you two are the most gorgeous girls I know."

"He's a charmer Kathleen – but we'll keep him anyways." Leaning over she brushed her lips over Patrick's.

"How are you feeling?" he asked. "Do you want to lie down?"

She was reluctant to say yes. There was a part of her that felt she had missed so much already and she didn't want to miss another minute but it had been a big morning and she could feel her eyes drooping.

"Maybe just for a little bit" she agreed. "But I'll lie down here"

Quirking up an eyebrow, he looked at her quizzically. "You don't want to sleep in our bed? I thought you'd be dying to get under those covers."

She shook her head, smiling. "I want to stay down here in case you get in to trouble and need my help."

"What kind of trouble? My girl and I are just going to hang out and maybe watch some football or something. It's never too soon to get her started on appreciating the finer things in life."

"Epiphany told me."

Narrowing her eyes, he mock glared at her. "Told you what?"

Trying in vain to stifle her laughter, Robin grinned. "How you put the diaper on backwards. Twice."

His cheeks reddened. "They're confusing!" he protested. "They're so little and the tabs don't always make it clear. And-" As Robin laughed heartily, her hands pressed to her stomach, Patrick growled.

"I guess being a neurosurgeon isn't all it's cracked up to be now, is it?"

"You know, when you're better, I'm going to punish you."

A feline smile crossed her face. "I'm pretty sure you punishing me is what brought on labour" she teased. "You don't even know your own strength."

"Oh shut up" he grumbled good naturedly.

It was a moment she had been waiting for, to be able to tease him about the events leading up to her water breaking. She knew he was wracked by guilt and somehow felt responsible for what had happened. She had reassured him in as many ways as she could, telling him outright that none of it was his fault and finally they had reached the point where he didn't seem guilt stricken at the mere mention of it.

She cuddled Kathleen to her as he went in search of pillows and a blanket. Looking down at her daughter, she traced her fingertip along her full lips. "You and I are lucky girls Kathleen," she told her. "Your daddy is a pretty special guy. You are a wonder – our miracle – and we are so lucky to have you." The newborn kicked her legs out and stared up at her mother. Robin kissed her chubby cheek.

Patrick returned and placing Kathleen in the car seat, got Robin settled for a nap. It didn't take long for her to fall asleep once her head hit the pillow.

He carried their daughter out to the kitchen, setting the car seat on the table. "So," he asked her, "what do you feel like doing? Should I show you around? I can't show you your room yet as that's something your mom and I want to do together but I could show you the kitchen. And my 56 inch plasma television with HD. Okay, so the HD may not mean that much to you now but trust me, in a couple of months when you're watching Dora and Diego in HD glory, you'll thank me."

Lifting her up, he held her in his arms and took her on a tour of the kitchen. He pointed out the fridge and showed her the already prepared bottles of formula, he held her up to look out the window at the backyard and promised, when she was older, to build her a tree house. They walked to the family room where he waxed poetically about watching sports in HD on the big screen.

Almost half an hour later she started to fuss and he returned to the kitchen to retrieve a bottle from the fridge. Having warmed it up, he sat down at the table with her in his arms and started to feed her. He could not keep the smile from his face as she sucked hungrily on the bottle. This was not a moment he had ever sought out but now that he had it, he could not imagine living his life without it.

Kathleen pulled away from the bottle and scrunching up her face, promptly spat up on her father. Laughing quietly, Patrick sat her back in the car seat, pulled off his t-shirt, wiped her face and picked her up again. Holding her to his shoulder, he rubbed her back as he paced the floor.

"What's up pumpkin?" he asked her quietly. "Did you eat too quickly? That happens to me sometimes. Well I don't actually throw up but I do get a tummy ache – generally it involved too many wings and too much beer too fast – and it involves Uncle Eric. I know Eric isn't here but if it makes you feel better to blame him, go right ahead."

"Poor Eric," Robin remarked from the doorway. "Getting picked on and he doesn't even know it."

Patrick turned around and grinned unapologetically. "He probably deserves it for something he did somewhere along the way."

Robin's breath hitched in her throat as she stared at her boyfriend – shirtless, jeans slung low on his hips and their daughter pressed happily to his shoulder.

"You know, if I could…..I would so jump you right now."

Patrick's eyes widened in surprise and he quickly covered Kathleen's ears with his hand. "Hey! No sex talk in front of the little one."

Shaking her head, Robin crossed the kitchen and standing on her tip toes, kissed him. "I can't help myself," she told him, "you are all kinds of hot holding her."

Blushing, he stole another kiss. "Do you want to feed her the rest of her bottle?"

Robin nodded and picked the bottle up from the table before heading to the family room and sitting down on the couch. Patrick followed and placed her in her arms before sitting down next to her and draping his arm across her shoulder.

Kathleen readily accepted the bottle again and Robin trailed her fingers along her legs, delighting in her tiny reactions.

"Can I ask you something?" Patrick queried as he curled his fingers through her hair at the back of her neck.

"Of course" she replied softly.

"How…how did it feel when they put her on your chest?"

Exhaling, Robin paused as she considered her answer. Misreading her reaction, Patrick began to backtrack. "If it's too personal you don't have to say anything."

Raising her eyes to meet his, she shook her head. "No, that's not it at all. I want to share this with you I'm just trying to find the words. It was very powerful," she told him. "The cord was pulsing and I could feel that connection between her and me. And I don't know….I don't know if it was my heart or my soul but in that instant I was almost overwhelmed by love. It's very different than the love I feel for you – it just – it felt as though every hardship or hurt was healed and I was ready to embrace everything." Tilting her head to the side, she scrunched up her face. "Does that sound incredibly dumb?"

Patrick shook his head and leaning in, gently nuzzled her neck. "No," he whispered. "When I watched her squirming on your chest I felt like I was suddenly wrapped in a goodness that I didn't know existed."

With a watery smile, Robin nodded. "I needed a miracle and you were it."

"No," he corrected. "We needed a miracle and she's it."