Notes: First of all, I'm insecure. I need feedback. Not to sound whiny but I need reviews. They don't even have to be good. They can cuss me out, but I need to know people are reading this. Okay, now that my possible breakdown has run its course, lets go on.
Chapter 5: The Masters of Backtracking
"Come on guys," Josh yelled behind him, "I can still hear them behind us." They had been running for hours and currently had no idea where they were, but the cuccos were relentless. Josh knew they had to find a building to hide in. His plan B was to head for a cliff wall that was another mile away. He heard the angry clucking again. "Come on guys!" They started sprinting again.
After 6 minutes, they reached the cliff wall. There was nothing quite like fear of complete death and obliteration to make someone better at something, like running. "Oh great," Adam sighed out of breath. Josh simply ignored the sarcasm and started climbing. Michael followed and then Adam did. Adam, who had never played much Zelda, asked, in Josh's mind, one of the most stupid questions he had ever heard. Halfway up the cliff, Adam asks, "So are we safe now?" Josh looked down, preparing to just stare at Adam, but as he looked down his eyes widened. He suddenly started climbing twice as fast.
Adam looked down and had just about the same reaction. The cuccos were somehow flowing up the cliff wall in their pecking flock. They were moving much faster than them. Adam picked up the pace and Michael didn't even dare to look down.
About three-fourths of the way up the cliff, the flock reached them. The cuccos fell upon the heroes with much pecking and clawing. The heroes responded with many curses and profanity. "Get off me you god damn birds," Michael yelled as he swatted at them. Josh had realized there was one soul cucco that was going after him only. He had strapped the Kali-yuga to his back and couldn't reach it because he was climbing. He saw the cucco coming for his face and pulled out his S & W 500. As he pulled the trigger, the gun clicked, and Josh let go another list of curses as he was forced to whack the bird with his gun. Adam was simply falcon punching any that close and that kept most of the cuccos off of him.
As they reached the top they began running instantly again. They broke through the flock somehow and literally yelled with happiness when they saw a house. Well, it was more of a mansion really, but they were panicking to much to care about what a mansion was doing by itself on a cliff. They ran inside and slammed the door behind them as the cuccos slammed against the wall. After another minute, they calmed down and just sat there out side like cuccos do.
They all sighed and looked behind them to look at the entrance of the mansion. Adam was very tired of all of this. "You know what guys?!" Adam suddenly yelled. "I-I'm done! I'm fucking done! I'm tired of all the running and the people trying to kill me!" Michael tried to calm him down.
"Adam," Michael started holding up his hands, "d-dude, don't have a cow." This only served to make Adam even more angry.
"N-n-n-no! You know what! I will have all the the cows. I will have so many cows, I'll start my own fast food chain of restaurants! I will have so many cows, everyone on the planet will have to stop what they are doing to kill and eat my cows to stop them from over populating! Then, everyone's gonna eat so much cows, their DNA is going to somehow fuse with the cow DNA they are eating. Then they're going to stop killing cows and the cows are going to grow super intelligent and take over the world!" (Adam actually came up with this rant in real life.) It went on for a bit longer with something about robots and the atmosphere catching on fire, but Josh wasn't paying attention. He was looking at the entrance.
"Guys," Josh said to get their attention, "...I know this place." Josh had been here in a game. "Yes, this is exactly it! Guys, this is the mansion from the original Resident Evil." Just then the cuccos out side got louder and started running from something. They all three heard a familiar battle cry as someone swatted at them. "Kratos! Come on guys, I have a plan." Josh seemed to know what he was doing, but he ran off to the left right after he said that.
They crossed through a door into a dining room and Josh kept running to the end where he grabbed a emblem off from above the fireplace. "Come on," he kept insisting, "we're going to need this." Josh ran into the door that was to the right of the fireplace. After crossing through the door after Josh, Michael and Adam found themselves in a hallway. They looked left to see Josh finish off a zombie with his dagger. As he walked by them he said, "This way, just a bit farther." He led them to a red door that was locked. "Adam?" Adam then walked up and punched the door in.
Inside the room was a bar. There a table with some chairs and some stools around a liquor counter. In the middle of the room was a piano. To the right was a few shelves. Josh quickly ran over and pushed one of the shelves back, revealing what was on the other shelf. It was some sheet music. Josh grabbed it and sat down at the piano. "My little brother taught me some piano," Josh explained. "Lets hope it pays off." He began to play. After a few seconds of playing, a section of the wall began to rise. Michael was about to shout something about it, but Adam silenced him since Josh had to focus. As the song reached its conclusion, there was now a hole in the wall straight up to the ceiling. Josh got up and yelled, "everybody get in!" He pushed Michael and Adam inside.
Inside it was a little hallway. One of the walls was a window, but it only allowed them to see another room. At the end of the hallway was a statue. It had an emblem on it that looked like the one Josh had grabbed except it was more golden. Josh quickly ran by them and yanked it out of the statue. The wall behind them closed and they were trapped inside. "What are you do-," Michael started to yell before Josh silenced him with a finger to his own mouth. They all sat there quietly and waited a minute before hearing some footsteps come into the bar room. They all tensed up in silence as they knew it was Kratos. The next 5 minutes were agony for them all. After that, they heard Kratos leave slowly. They waited 5 more minutes just to be safe. After that, Josh took out the wooden emblem and placed it in the statue. the wall opened up again. They all stepped out as slowly as possible. Kratos was gone.
"Okay guys," Josh said, "we're going to have to go through the mansion and solve the puzzles of Resident Evil. This was going to involve a lot of pointless back tracking.
"Okay," Adam said, "lead the way Josh. You're the expert on this stuff."
No offense people, but it really is pointless, so I'm actually skipping all of this, except for 2 scenes. This is because these are the only scenes that has any relevance to the plot what so ever and it doesn't matter much. If you want all the plotless, boring walking, and I don't know why you would, go somewhere else.
They entered a bed room. It had a bed and a few other furnishings but what they noticed was there was a Windhelm shotgun. it was hanging on the wall by some hooks. "Okay, this is where we use the rusted shotgun to replace that one," Josh sighed. It had been about an hour and they were not even half way through the mansion.
"I don't see why you won't use that bag there Josh," Adam pointed out. Josh looked confused before he looked down and noticed he had a bag tied to his jeans. He had just noticed it.
Josh opened it up and looked through it. He suddenly froze and looked up with a strange expression. "...This is Link's bag," he said sadly. "...I stole Link's bag. Great. This sounds a bit cruel to me but, we might as well use it." Josh was a bit upset but the truth he realized was, they needed all the help they could get. So in the end, Michael got a new shotgun and Josh got a magic bag.
They were in another room. "On your right!" Josh shouted. Michael turned and blasted a zombie's head off with his Windhelm. "Alright lets- Whoa!" Josh noticed the wall. One of the walls was a mirror. But what really shocked Josh was their appearance. They all looked different from a few days ago.
Josh's muscles had started to become toned and he could see them. He had also started to grow a goatee, which while he had always wanted, had never been able to do. He looked 23, which was 5 years older then he was.
Adam had started to get thinner, except for his upper body which was toning out, much like Captain Falcon's body.
Michael had the most dramatic change though. He had began to grow a thick beard, which they all thought was awesome. Michael had begun to get buff. His muscles were growing larger then Josh's and he looked older also. They all just couldn't believe what was happening.
"The powers are changing us dramatically," Adam said and the others only nodded. They all just looked at the strangers in the mirror for the next few minutes.
"We should get going," Josh suddenly said and turned. He grabbed something off the bed in the room and walked out, leaving the others to follow him.
"Yes!" Josh yelled. They were in a court yard path and they had reached a door which required 4 emblems of various things. "Okay were done for now with the mansion. Lets go outside now." Josh took out the emblems and opened the gate. They walked outside with so much relief that it can't be described. There was a stone path surrounded by trees and they noticed it was night already. Of course, their relief only lasted a few moments.
"What's that?" Michael said. A noise had begun to come from behind them. They all looked back and saw something terrible. There were black forms with yellow eyes coming at them. Michael knew what they were though. "Oh fuck, Black Ops zombies." Josh just looked at him with a look that said 'are you serious?'. "...Run!" They all broke out in a sprint yet again. They didn't even know where they were running.
Suddenly Michael tripped. Josh and Adam looked back at him. He had tripped over mining equipment. "Who the fuck leaves mini-," Michael started to say as he picked up a pickax before he got that look in his eyes. He had got a new power. Michael suddenly jumped up and ran to the solid cliff wall. He suddenly began to tear into the wall with his pickax as Adam and Josh just looked at him. "Minecraft poweeeerrrrrr!"
As you would suspect, the mountain never stood a chance. His friends followed the tunnel as Michael tore through the mountain. They couldn't see, but the kept going forward. "Don't worry guys," Michael assured them, "we will esca- Holy shit!" Michael suddenly began to drop, but Adam and Josh caught him and pulled him back.
They had apparently dug through the cliff and reach the other side, which was another cliff. They looked down before hearing a noise behind them. The zombies were coming. Josh thought about what they had to work with and suddenly it came to him. Of course, as usual, the idea was completely insane. Josh opened his bag and took out Link's deku shield. He had Michael use it as a make shift block of wood. He, regrettably, had Michael make it into a crafting table. Next, he took out his gold bars and almost sobbed a bit. He gave them to Michael and said one word. "Ironman." Michael suddenly understood and crafted the gold into boots. He placed them on the ground. "Get in them," Josh told Adam.
"Why me?" Adam questioned. He didn't see how this would save them.
"Just do it!" Josh yelled and Adam stuck his feet into the boots. They suddenly wrapped around his feet and Adam got that look in his eyes. Suddenly, he grabbed their hands and lept off the cliff with a burst of energy into the air.
Josh had made Michael craft Ironman boots and they were currently flying through the air. After a half hour of flying, Josh noticed they were getting lower. "Adam," Josh questioned, "why are we getting lower?"
"Well," Adam explained, "there is no fuel source attached to the boots, so basically, we're out of fuel."
"Hmm...," Michael and Josh said at the same time. "...Fuck!" Then, they ran out of fuel and plummetted out of the sky.
Notes: Okay, sorry for the delay, but I have summer school. It's only one more week though so don't worry. Problem though, I am starting a pokemon fan fic. No, undaed, not that one. This will be a mystery dungeon one. I started playing it and got pikachu. How the fuck do you even do that? Well, I will be starting that, so read it, and my friend undaed's stories. Bye.