Chapter Five
Buffy plopped down in the seat next to Spike and smiled as he frowned at her.
"What were you doing?" Spike asked. Angel and Cordy looked at the pair as Buffy's smirk grew and Spikes displeasure rose. Faith was at the bar trying to con her way into some beer and Connor was on the floor dancing.
"What did it look like I was doing?" Buffy retorted. Spike glared at the younger girl and Buffy couldn't help the smile that spread across her face. She found that it was fun to tease Spike and it was quickly becoming on of her favorite pastimes, next to annoying the hell out of booth of her brothers and Sam, she knew how to push all of their buttons but she liked to try new things and Spike was very new.
"By the look on your face I can tell you've never seen a hot girl dance before."
"So you think you're hot?" Spike asked, already knowing the answer to the question.
"I know I am but I'm more interested in what you think." Spike looked at his two friends who had yet to take their eyes off of them and blushed. Lucky for him Faith chose that same moment to flop down next to him and start a rant about the stupid bartender and how he wouldn't give her any beer.
"Do you need beer that bad?" Buffy asked. Faith nodded and Buffy glanced at the bar her eyes widened as she saw who was behind it.
"I'll be right back." She quickly got up and made her way through the crowd of people. The three teens watched after her all the while wearing questioning looks on their faces as she started to chat with the guy behind the counter.
"What was that about?" Cordy asked her boyfriend from her position on his lap. He surged and turned to look at Spike who had yet to take his eyes from the blond/red headed girl.
"So what's up with you and Buffy?" Faith asked. Spike tore his eyes away from the blond and looked at Faith who was wearing an evil implying smirk.
"Nothing we're just friends." Faith snickered and Spike glared at her.
"What ever you say lover boy. I think she'd be good for you." She turned to Cordy and Angel getting nods out of both of them. Spike just shook his head and blocked out everything around him. He could no longer see Buffy and he found that he was very disappointed at the fact.
The blond girl was so fiery and out spoken and Spike would be lying if he said he didn't think she was hot. It was just a good thing he didn't have to tell her that just yet. He was brought out of his daze by Faith's squeal of happiness. He looked over in the direction that it came from and saw that the other girl had Buffy in an embrace.
"She got us beer!" Faith yelled breaking away from Buffy and holding up the bottle for Spike to see. He glanced over at Angel and Cordy and found that they too had beer.
"How'd you do that?" Spike asked turning back to Buffy. She grinned and sat back in her previous seat beside him and handed him a bottle.
"I know the bartender" she said simply. Spike nodded and the five teens started to chat as music played around them.
Buffy smiled for the tenth time that night and tried to remember why she let her guard down around Spike and his friends. They were so nice and that fact made her not want to get too close to them. She could only bring them pain and that fact scared her.
"Lets dance" Faith said breaking Buffy out of her thoughts. She looked up at the brown headed girl and shook her head no.
"Come on Angel and Cordy are out there and I know you can dance cause I saw you. Get your ass up and on the floor with me." Buffy looked over at Spike who nodded as recurrence for her to go, she smile softly at him and got up and headed out to dance with Faith.
Spike watched as her body moved to the beat and could help the naughty thoughts that ran through his head as he did so. A crowed of guys surrounded the two girls and Buffy looked a little uncertain but still continued to dance as Faith embraced the guys and moved against them.
"Jealous much" Connor said as she sat down in the seat Faith had been earlier. Spike tore his eyes away from Buffy once more and looked at the younger teen at his right. This was the first time Connor had taken it upon himself to actually talk to him and not say something rude. The bleached blond knew the younger boy wasn't that found of his step-brother and knew that was the reason he shied away from his friends, choosing to be alone most of the time.
"What makes you say that?"
Connor smirked and let his eyes roll down to the bottle in Spike's hand. "For one thing you have a death grip on that bottle," Connor started. Spike loosened his hold on the beer bottle and Connor grinned as he did so. "And I can just see it in your eyes."
Spike let his eyes look up to meet Connors brown ones and tried to see what laid in their deeps. "How can you tell?" Spike asked. Connor surged and closed his eyes briefly.
"What can I say… it's a gift?"
Two songs passed and the two sat there in stillness as everyone else around them chatted or danced the rest of the night away. As Spike finished his beer he got up and sent Connor a look letting him know that he would be right back. The younger boy turned away looking unfazed by the blue eyed teen and continued to stare out into space.
Spike found himself making his way towards the group of guys that surrounded Buffy and Faith, he made his way thought the crowd and grabbed Buffy by her arm. Her eyes shot open in surprise and shock but softened as she saw that it was just him.
She let him lead her to the middle of the floor and wrapped his arms around her waist as the song changed and the other people on the floor were forced to stop the wild dancing they were doing and get into a calmer mood.
"May I have this dance luv?" Spike asked as he leaned down and whispered softly in her ear. Buffy nodded slowly and wrapped her arms around his neck and looked into his blue eyes.
So deep, that it didn't even bleed and catch me
Off guard, red handed
Now I'm far from lonely
Asleep, I still see you lying next to me
So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me, I...
Buffy let her head rest on his chest and she felt his hold tighten on her waist.
I need something else
Would someone please just give me
Hit me, knock me out and let me go back to sleep
I can laugh all I want inside I still am empty
So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me, I...
Spike smiled as she cuddled into his chest and he let everything but him and Buffy slip away as the song played on.
I'll be just fine pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely and it's all that I've got
I'll be just fine pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely and it's all that I've got
Buffy let her hand idly play in Spike's hair and couldn't help but feel safe in his arms, like nothing could hurt her as long as she was wrapped in his embrace. Never before had she felt this safe in another guys embrace besides her brothers and Sam's. It scared her a little to think about it. Getting close to people scared her.
I guess, I remember every glance you shot me
Unharmed, I'm losing weight and some body heat
I squoze so hard I stopped your heart from beating
So deep that I didn't even scream
"FUCK ME", I..
Spike felt Buffy stiffen in his arms and pulled her back so he could see her face. Her green orbs shimmered with sadness and Spike wanted so bad to take it all way. She gave him a brave smile and put her head back on his chest.
I'll be just fine pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely and it's all that I've got
I'll be just fine pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely and it's all that I've got
And it's all that I've got
Yeah, it's all that I've got
It's all that I've got
It's all that I've got
It's all that I've got
So deep, that it didn't even bleed and catch me
So deep that I didn't even scream "FUCK ME"
I'll be just fine pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely and it's all that I've got
I'll be just fine pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely and it's all that I've got
And it's all that I've got
Yeah, it's all that I've got
When the song was over Buffy reluctantly let go of the bleached blond and looked down at her boots as a blush spread across her cheeks. Spike lead her back to their table and Buffy just followed behind him silently. When they reached their destination Buffy flopped down in the chair next to Faith. She grinned at the blond and Buffy rolled her eyes.
"What?" Buffy asked.
"Did you enjoy you dance with Spike? You two looked pretty cozy over there on the dance floor." Buffy blushed and looked over at Spike who was talking to Angel a couple of feet away.
Faith put a hand on the blonds shoulder and Buffy looked up at her. "I think you'd be really good for him" Buffy looked at the older girl in shock and Faith chuckled. "I mean Spike has been known to have his share of girlfriends but he's never acted like this around any of them. I think he's really serious about you."
"How can he be serious about me if we aren't even going out?" Buffy asked. "I mean we barely know each other." She looked away from Faith once more and slyly let her eyes glance over in Spike's direction. She looked away quickly once she found him staring back at her.
Faith laughed aging and Buffy frowned. These emotions and feelings she was having were ones she hadn't felt for a long time, she wondered briefly if what Jer had been telling her was right all along. She quickly shook those thoughts from her head and tried to remember what they had taught her in therapy.
"I need a drink" Buffy stood up and made her way threw the crowd of people and headed to the bar. She paid no mind to Faith's shouts for her to come back. Once she reached the bar she took a seat on one of the stools and sent the bartender a sweet smile.
"I never thought I'd see you here, and working as a bartender no less. How's life been for ya?"
The man behind the bar gave Buffy a goofy smile and put a bottle of beer in front of her. She took it gratefully and took a sip as she waited for him to answer.
"Life sucks" he told her flatly. He brushed his dark hair out of his brown eyes and looked back up at Buffy.
Buffy giggled and nodded in agreement. "You don't even know that half of it." She took a big gulp of beer and looked up at the older man. "So how are things with Anya, still with her?"
He nodded and took out a rag and stared to clean out a glass. "Yep still going strong. How are things with you a Jeremy? The last time I saw you you weren't looking so hot and he was still taking care of you."
Buffy cringed at his words and her head stared to spin, and this wasn't from the effects of the beer. She had thought about her past a lot since Jer had been reminding her about it so often but it had been so log since she had actually heard his name spoken.
"Buffy are you ok?"
Buffy looked up but all the color had drained from her face. "I'm fine Xander… I just don't wanna talk about Je- him right now, or ever for that matter."
Xander nodded. "I understand, it ended badly huh?"
Buffy nodded trying to fight back the memories that were starting to resurface. "Yeah," she chocked out, "it did."
She felt a hand on her shoulder and turned around to see Spike. He almost fell to the ground when he saw Buffy and the state she was in. She looked about ready to cry, her cheeks had lost all of their color, and Spike didn't like it one bit.
He gave the bartender an icy glare and pulled Buffy close to him. "What the bloody hell did you do to her?" Xander was about to retort but Buffy sent him a look and grabbed Spikes arm.
"He didn't do anything to me so don't yell at him. He's my friend, I know him from L.A." Spike nodded giving Xander a once over then turning back to Buffy, she rested her head on his chest and he ran his hand threw her hair.
"I'm kinda of tired, do you and Angel need a ride home?" Buffy asked, her voice sounding tired and drained.
Spike shook his head. "Angel doesn't but I do." Buffy smiled faintly and turned to look at Xander.
"I'll see you later ok? I'm headed home so I'll tell the guys you said hi." She hopped off the stool swaggering a little and Spike put his hand on the swell of her back. "Tell Anya I said hi and take care of your self."
"Will do," Xander said with a nod. "And I'm sorry for bring up you know who…"
"It's fine, I'll see you later." She walked off into the crowd of people and Spike followed after her but not before giving Xander one last glare.
Buffy maneuvered threw the crowd of people and Spike followed closely behind her, they reached the table where everyone was sitting and talking off in their own little world.
"Were gonna go" Spike said. Angel looked up at him and gave questioning looks to him and Buffy.
"I really need to get home and Spike shouldn't even be here so he's in more need to get there than I am." She forced a smile on her face and stared at the people who had been so nice to her. "I had a good time, thanks for that. I'll see you guys at school or something ok?"
She didn't wait for a reply as she took off in the direction of the exit. They all looked after her then turned their attention back to Spike, whose eyes were still on Buffy.
"Connor and I can get a ride home with Faith so you should go." Angel said breaking Spike out of his daze. Spike nodded and went after Buffy.
Once Spike got out to the car he saw Buffy idly standing beside it smoking a cigarette, she took a long drag and let the smoke linger behind her lips before she exhaled it out into the cold night.
"I didn't know you smoked" Spike said walking the rest of the distance to the car. He stopped in front of Buffy and she surged as an answer to his question.
"I'm trying to quit but tonight feels like a good night for one." She took one more drag before throwing it to the ground and walking over to the drives side, she unlocked the doors and she climbed in with Spike following suit.
She started the car and drove out of the parking lot. "Where do you live?" Buffy asked breaking the silence that fell upon them.
Spike gave her directions and they fell back into an uncomfortable silence. They drove around for about en minutes before Buffy reached Spikes house, Buffy said her goodbyes and Spike got out of the car.
"Thanks for the invite, I had fun."
Spike looked at her as if he was trying to study her every facial detail. Buffy snapped her finger in front of his face and broke him out of his daze "Did you really have fun luv?"
Buffy stared back at him wondering how he knew she had been lying. She smiled fakely at him and nodded her head trying to convince him so she could just go home and sleep the rest of the night away.
"Ok, I'll see you tomorrow." Spike walked away and Buffy watched him go, once he was safely inside the house she pulled off and sped dawn the street to her own.
Jer sat up from his place on his bed and looked across his room only to be met by his sister's sad eyes.
"Buffy, what's wrong?" Jer asked. He rose from his spot on the bed and walked over to his sister, he wrapped his arms around her and she burred her head in his shoulder.
"You were right; I should have never gotten attached." Her voice was shaky and filled with sadness. That made Jer wonder just how she had to find that fact out.
"What brought all this on?"
Buffy pulled back and took a seat on the edge of Jer's bed, he remained standing as Buffy started to speak.
"I ran into Xander at the club and he asked me about… him" Jer looked at his sister with worry written on ever aspect of his being. He hurriedly sat down beside her and she put her head on his shoulder. "All those memories started to come back full force and I just don't think I'm ready to start anything with any one right now. I think it would be best if I didn't se any of them again, that way it's easier on all of us."
Jer didn't know what to say, he should be happy that Buffy had listened to him and came and apologized to him but he just couldn't feel it. His sister was hurting, Buffy was in pain and even though he was right it was tearing him up inside. He hadn't wanted to be right and actually hearing Buffy say all of those things were staring to rip him a part in side. He felt like he caused all of this in some way and that really made him feel ten times worse.
"It's ok Buffy, were all here for you and we won't ever let anything like what happened to you in L.A happen again" Jer whispered
"I know" Buffy said just as quietly, "I know."
The next day Buffy didn't go to school and Spike was rather upset by that fact. When Buffy dropped him off his father wasn't home from work yet so he had got off scoot free. He watched some TV for awhile but when it was time for bed he had problems getting there.
Spike couldn't forget the way Buffy had looked when she saw her sitting at the bar. She wasn't herself that much he could tell, and he knew it had something to do with her talk with the bartender. He had said something about bring up 'you know who' and Spike was very tempted to ask her about that but he didn't have the heart after they reached the car.
Something was up with Buffy and he planed on finding out just what that something was.
"Hey, where's Buffy?"
The five teens looked up at him and Spike noticed that the guy from the hospital was there today. Dawn gave him a small smile and a wave but she quickly turned around once Jer shot her a look.
No one said anything for a long time and Spike just stood there determined not to back down. Sam glared t him coldly and Dean let out a loud sigh.
"I guess I should tell him, huh?" Dean asked.
"You shouldn't have to but I guess some people can't take a hint to when there not wanted" Sam snapped still glaring death daggers at Spike.
"Sam, that's enough. Buffy wouldn't want you…." She trailed off and stared down at her plate. "That's just enough ok?" Sam sighed and complied with his girlfriend's request.
Dean led Spike out of the lunch room and Faith, Angel, and Cordy watched as they left with worried looks on their faces.
This could not be good.
"Look Spike… Buffy's at home with Morgan today and she'll be back tomorrow."
Spike looked relived but had felling that that wasn't all of what Dean was about to say. Why would it be? He wouldn't drag him all the way out of the cafeteria just to tell him something he could have said in there.
"Ok, so why didn't you just say that in there?" Spike asked voicing his thoughts.
Dean sighted again and ran a hand threw his short hair.
"Buffy doesn't want anything to do with you or your friends. I think it's best if you guys stay away from her for her own good."
Spike was taken aback by what Dean was saying, how could Buffy not want to see him any more, this really didn't sound like her. But then again how could he know, he'd only known her fro a short while, for all he knew this could be just like her.
"She'll be back tomorrow but you should just try to keep your distance, not just from her from all of us." Dean turned to go but turned back around and finally looked Spike in the eyes. "I'm really sorry about this, we never meant for any of this to happen."
Dean sounded really serious about what he was saying, still the only thing Spike could do was nod. Dean turned away and went back into the cafeteria and Spike just stood there in total shock unable to wrap his mind around what he had just been told.
An image of Buffy from their night at the Bronze flashed threw his head. The pain and hurt she wore on her face was what he saw first but then another image of when they were dancing replaced the former one.
Spike smiled to himself and made a silent vow not to give up on the blond girl. He would find out what caused her to act the way she did sooner or later.
-
-
-
So sorry for the lateness of this chapter but I've been very busy with school and right now I'm not doing so well in some of my classes. I have two C's and that's not like me, I've been trying to bring them up but I promise to put updating somewhere on the list of my things to do. I really hope you guys liked this chapter. The song that Buffy and Spike danced to was All That I've Got by the Used and I have no rights to that as well. I hope you guys have been doing better than I have, see ya when I see ya.