"Here's your pay of 400 Poké up front. I'll stop by when work lets out to pick my son up." A Sandslash says handing over a bag of money. When the mine caught word that Boon and I were heading back to Timburr Town, Sandshrew begged his parents to let us escort him there to visit his friend. Despite my protests Boon agreed to the task. The father Sandslash adjusted the straps on his son's satchel.
"Sandshrew, you behave yourself. Am I clear?" He said sternly. The boy excitedly bobbed his head up and down.
"Yes sir! I'll be good! I promise!" He jogged to our side and waved to his parents. "Bye! See you tonight!"
"Goodbye dear!" The mother replied. "Take care of him?"
"No problem!" Boon assured laughing. "You won't find a patch out of place!" Time to get a move on. The three of us leave the Hub by a tunnel in its south. Thankfully Boon keeps the kid busy, so I tune out their voices as I follow the map towards the exit. According to the map this corridor will eventually take us to the exit nearest Timburr Town. It takes some time but we get to our destination; apparently so did the Explorers—two are guarding the chamber's entrance. I wave for everyone to hit the deck and duck behind the nearest corner. A quick flip in the Pokédex identifies the guards as Lilligant and Glameow. These two are not much of a defense, but if I can avoid fighting them this escort will go much more smoothly. I check the map for any alternate paths into the exit chamber but regrettably there aren't any. All I can find are more paths connecting to our tunnel leading deeper into the mines. This means the only way to leave is to go through this Exploration Team checkpoint. Not entirely sure the mine workers are going to appreciate that but they might workaround it by digging their way underneath. I wish I could do the same.
My eyes fall onto Sandshrew whom is obediently staying hidden beside Boon. Maybe he can recon the place for us? No, that's a stupid idea. He's the escort. The Explorers will know something's up if he is scoping out the mines he should already know by heart.
"You know what we're guarding this place for?" Glameow asks the other Explorer.
"Scuttlebutt says two Pokémon are killing Explorers in this mine." Explains Lilligant.
"Killing?" The grey cat scoffs. "Who kills anymore?"
"Dusknoir. Duh."
"That was four years ago. And he's dead; future wipe got him."
"If the human could survive the wipe, why couldn't he?"
"You're just being paranoid." I'm getting really interested in these other humans. I wonder if there are any on Jichi? It might help to team up with them if there are. Lilligant plays with the giant flower on her head.
"I'm changing the subject. Do you know how to use these badges? They're supposed to have telepathy."
"Of course!" Glameow says. "Just push the big pink button and twist the pin on top." Well this conversation is helpful. Boon and I are already following the instructions. Boon wants a pepper burrito.
…Where did that thought come from? I look at the Pikachu in confusion; he's trying hard not to laugh. Hold on a second… I think that was the badge's telepathy. Boon thinks so too, but he's disappointed it isn't like in the stories.
This thing is so weird, but I like it. So apparently telepathy doesn't send actual words or phrases mentally, instead it sends ideas. I attempt sending an understanding of the AK47 towards Boon, whom shifts uncomfortably. Telepathically he makes me aware that for the millionth time, yes he believes in my humanity. I guess an assault rifle would be comparable to alien technology for him. Heh, these badges are kind of fun. The two Explorers guarding the chamber entrance have shut up now, probably due to testing out their newfound telepathic communications much like we were. This is the perfect time to strike, so I send Boon the plan.
We leap out and attack. I deliver an Ember and Scratch onto Lilligant while Boon Thunder Waves and Quick Attacks Glameow. Tangos down.
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
What is that!? An alarm!? Boon, Sandshrew and I sprint into the chamber as the siren rings overhead. Where is that thing coming from!? No time to look; we have to leave!
"That's the ladder!" Boon shouts pointing at a steel ladder along the rock wall. A gated barrier surrounds our exit locked by a number of padlocks. As he fiddles with the gate Sandshrew wails regret.
"Oh man! I forgot! This gate we locked last night!"
"WHY!?" Is the Pikachu's response. Frantically our escort digs through his bag as more Explorers move in on us. Zigzagoon. Growlithe. Snubbull. Meowth. I can feel the recognition of the species be thrust into my brain by the Explorer Badge's communication abilities.
"Give it up! You're going nowhere!" Growlithe barks. Boon and I jump into cover behind rocks and use our ranged moves to attempt picking off the Exploration Team, whom responds with ranged moves of their own.
"Got one!" Sandshrew calls raising a small key as much as he could. He immediately opens one lock and searches through his bag for the next key. Snubbull and Meowth fall to the combined efforts of my ally and me, prompting the other two Explorers to create some more distance between us. Boon sends a message of relief towards me which is quickly altered to recognition of enemy reinforcements—two Mankey, a Machop, and an unidentified yellow and grey Pokemon with two long frills hanging from its head.
"Helping Hand used! Now rush 'em!" Growlithe orders as he and Zigzagoon sprint at us. The striped raccoon goes down easily enough but the dog one jumps on Boon with jaws ready to strike. The Pikachu grunts in pain as he holds Growlithe's face away from his, though the effort he makes shows he can't do so for very long. A dose of Dragon Rage results in a beaten down puppy.
"That's another lock!" Sandshrew updates. "Three more to go!" Aside from the four additional Explorers Boon spotted, I notice twelve more entering our chamber and moving throughout. Looks like three of them are Wurmple, Swellow, and Gligar of Team Taste-Test.
"This is for you, bro! Team Pounder, move in!" Machop commands as his allies the two Mankey and the yellow thing close in with him. "Mankies! Both of you Leer! Helioptile, Pound them!" Oh no they don't. Boon and I work hard on the Mankies with our Moves leaving Helioptile able to perform Pound on me as its teammates fall. I'm knocked down by the blow and Boon saves my ass by Thunder Waving the yellow lizard thing. Machop charges with a glowing fist ready to punch my face in— I respond by leaping out of its way and countering with Scratches. Three of them are enough to drop him. Helioptile has already been finished off by Boon in one way or another.
"Woot!" The Pikachu cheers fist pumping. "New Move! I'm going to replace Tail Whip with this!" Boon points his ears forward and lets out a quick beam of light from the space between them. "And that's that! Wonder what it does."
"Holy crud. Did they take out Pounder already? Someone needs to move in! Now!" An Explorer in cover chats with its allies. Boon goes through Machop's satchel and tosses me a Max Elixir.
"Ember… Growl… Scratch… Smokescreen… Dragon Rage-wait a minute! That's five!" He exclaims. "Dude! Try Growl." I attempt to but instead of the familiar white energy ring I release small blue flames from my mouth. "Yep. You changed a Move too. Did you even notice that?" No, actually I didn't.
"They have time to restock on PP between our attacks! What are we waiting for?" Explorers are getting restless, so I chug down the Max Elixir and send a telepathic message for Boon toss me a match and stick of dynamite.
"That's three!" Sandshrew counts throwing the third padlock off.
"Alright fine! Stand back everyone; Team Normal is on the job!" Two Furret, a Sentret, and a Zigzagoon run from their cover behind some rocks and attempt to rush us. As they run I use a match to light the dynamite's fuse and toss it at the group. "Incom-"
BOOM
Team down. Need another stick. The rest of the Explorers stare in horror as Boon tosses me more explosives. Along with the TNT he sends the telepathic message we have two sticks of dynamite and three Blast Seeds remaining.
"Fuck this! Let's all go!" A Ledyba Explorer shouts flying out of cover. Gligar pulls her back before Boon can fire off a ThunderShock at it. It is an Eevee whom chews it out (These badges and Boon's species recognition knowledge is more handy than my Pokédex. Need to get rid of it along with my apparently crappy history book.)
"Are you insane!?" The brown fox shouts. "Did you see what they did to Team Normal!? If we all go they'll-" The Explorer paused as if it couldn't bring itself to speak of what happened. "…at once!" How far are they right now? Good couple of feet—can I throw that far? Worth a shot. I light the dynamite and lob it towards the cover Ledyba and its allies are in, landing it pretty dang close. "Oh shit! Run!" In a panic they rush out of their positions and the TNT explodes; it's shockwave powerful enough to send four Pokémon flying through the mine even outside the blast radius. Ledyba wasn't fortunate enough to make it out of the explosion's reach, and judging from the additional husk a Hoppip wasn't either. Eevee struggles to its feet as Gligar limps behind another rock formation.
"Team Sitrus is up." The brown fox unpassionately states. A Cranidos rushes up to Eevee and Lillipup, giving them each large blue berries. They quickly wolf them down and are immediately moving in to fight us. Through telepathy I order Boon to chuck our Blast Seeds at them; don't want to use up all the dynamite right now. Team Sitrus is able to rush through the three small explosions, but they appear to be near the end of their rope as a result. Both Eevee and Lillipup place their paws on Cranidos whom then glows in a rainbow aura. All three resume their charge with Cranidos appearing the most confident.
"Hey!" Sandshrew yells. "I got the fourth lock!" Awesome. One more left.
Boon takes out Lillipup with his Thunder Shocks and I eliminate Eevee using Ember, then Cranidos is paralyzed by a Thunder Wave, leaving only another Thunder Shock to win the battle. My badge tells me Boon is wondering if the Explorers will ever learn charging us does not work. From the tunnels I notice yet more Exploration Teams coming into our chamber, this time there are at least twenty four. These numbers are beginning to get a little uncomfortable, to say the least.
"We got here as soon as we could!" says a pale yellow Explorer ducking into cover; it has what appears to be a black Venus flytrap growing out of its head. Mawile. "What's the sitrep?"
"They're trying to escape with that ladder. We've lost a few Exploration Teams so far trying to stop them, and Gligar is wounded." Answers Swellow.
"Did you try going after the Sandshrew?" Uh oh. I toss Boon the matches and telepathically instruct him to light our dynamite.
"Ma'am?" Swellow asks the Mawile in shock.
"The Sandshrew. It's the one opening the ladder."
"But that's just a civilian. We can't harm-"
"If they're assisting the outlaws, they're accomplices. Get him." At that moment even more Explorers enter our chamber—dammit Sandshrew, hurry up and find that last key! This place is getting packed!
"S-S-Sandshrew!" I yell. "Y-you find it y-yet!?"
"No!" Comes the reply.
"L-look harder!" Four more Explorers duck walk their way to our position (Cubone, Panpour, Chimchar, Buneary) while the rest get behind whatever cover of rocks they can find. Boon and I rapidly drop them two at a time before they can get their bearings and fight back.
"I can't find it!" The escort wails in dismay. "We need someone to bust the lock!" Fuck! Boon needs to throw the TNT now. And throws it he does, right into a grouping of five or six Explorers. Panic-stricken they scatter from the explosive but are unable to avoid getting blown into chunks by the blast.
"Start the assault! Everyone go now!" Mawile commands. From the amount of Explorers in a single room, it is as if an entire ocean of Pokémon is rushing at us as they perform stat-boosting Moves on each other. Sandshrew squeaks and curls up tight into a ball leaving just Boon and I to fight.
The battle is absolute chaos; lasers beams, fire, water, rocks, freaking everything flies throughout as we jump, duck, dodge, and attack. At first we run the pattern of dropping an Explorer and throwing random crap from their bags to kill a few more, but this only works for a minute flat. The swarm is simply too large and too frantic to waste any second not attacking. And it just does not end. For each Explorer we kill another two takes its place. I spray SmokeScreen all around me while Boon bounces around into hostiles like a pinball by stringing together Quick Attacks.
"Thunder Punch!" Shouts an Elekid as it swings a fist for my throat. I backpedal out of its way and waste it with an Ember and Scratch, pulling off its satchel as it falls. Totodile and Chikorita attempt to subdue me with Tackles so I bash their heads with Elekid's bag. Is this thing heavy enough to break the lock? I toss out a Wonder Orb from within its contents and run to the ladder's cage. Sandshrew remains uselessly curled up by his bag and my thrown Orb shatters against a Cleffa's face. In certain spots on the ground I can see the outlines of invisible tiles glow a red hue, and once one of those tiles is stepped on by an Explorer, it is bombarded by suddenly appearing chestnuts. I can see traps. I slam Elekid's satchel against the final lock but all it does is rattle it a bit. Not even a dent.
"Dude! Need some help here!" Boon shouts being cornered into a wall. Sandshew's bag of goodies has a few Wonder Orbs inside—I toss all of them. The results vary from every Explorer moving at half their usual speed, a Heracross dissolving into a bottle of Max Elixir (Fucking creepy. Every Explorer surrounding him takes a step back), and Boon warping to my location in a yellow light from the ceiling. "Thank you." He says downing what was once a blue bug. Probably shouldn't tell him that though. He shakes his head in disbelief as he Thunder Waves the horde. "They just keep coming!" I find a few more Max Elixirs in Sandshrew's bag and restock on PP.
"Mawile, we need a new plan! This isn't working!" An Explorer somewhere among the attackers yells. He gets his answer a moment later from someone else.
"Voltorbs ready!" Shouts a grouping of voices in the crowd. The mental image Boon sends me of a red and while ball exploding is frightening. After we defeat another twelve, all the Explorers return to normal speed. Unfortunate too, as at that moment the Exploration Teams clear a path for a sizable quadrupled Pokémon with a castle wall for a face; it is flanked by six Voltorbs.
"You can't stop me! I'm a Bastiodon!" The shielded one taunts. Boon is filling his telepathy with panicked emotions and Sandshrew's stash is dry. One good thing about the new arrivals though is that it made the rest of the Explorers back off. They must be pretty confident the Voltorbs and shield can do us in.
Suddenly the ground rumbles and an Explorer is yanked into the floor. Then another. Then ten more. The number rises exponentially, causing those fortunate enough to still be standing to rush around in circles. Naturally some of them trigger the traps, which sometimes explode and wipe out entire Exploration Teams in one swoop. I don't know what's going on, but I like it.
Two familiar moles spring from within the ground in front of us—Excadrill and Drilbur.
"What did I say!?" Drilburs shouts at me waving her arms sporadically. "What did I fucking say!? I'm blaming you Charmander for this!" The Bastiodon's legs are pulled through the dirt one by one leaving it immobile and susceptible to attack. Its accompanying Voltorbs are trapped halfway through the floor in a similar fashion. Excadrill's workers are rather effective suppressors.
"That's it boys!" Excadrill encourages. "You got them stuck in their tracks! This takes me back!" Takes you back? What the hell kind of crap did you use to do? The ground type turns to us and removes the goggles from his eyes. "You two sure know how to have fun! Need anything else?"
"Yeah! Thanks! We're having trouble with the locked ladder!" Boon explains. Excadrill yanks the final lock off as if it was taped on. The ladder cage swings open finally allowing escape.
"You take care now! It's been a pleasure!"
"Likewise!"
Drilbur nods a farewell of her own as Boon, Sandshrew and I climb the ladder to the surface. The Explorers are too busy attempting to save their friends stuck in the dirt to notice our exit, although I'm certain with time they will.
"I recognize this place!" Boon says once we all are standing on grassy ground and breathing fresh air. The sky never looked more beautiful. "We're near where I found you, Browley!" Are you serious? I do not want to go through a Mystery Dungeon again. I just want to get back to Timburr Town and finish running errands. Boon removes the bandages from his head, showing his wounds have healed completely. "Whew." He sighs. "That was getting sweaty. Now that we have a breather, what all did we nab from the Explorers?" The Pikachu and I empty our bags right then and there, taking stock of our inventory on the grass.
"Wow! Look at all this stuff!" Sandshrew gushes with sparkling eyes. "Seeds, Wonder Orbs, Scarves, Gravelrocks-"
"Who p-p-packed rocks?" I ask. Boon raises his hand smiling.
"That was me!"
"…W-why?"
"Because rocks hurt when you throw them at Pokémon. Duh!" This is true. I'm not keen on wasting carrying space on rocks though. We can grab rocks practically anywhere. There is almost no reason to shove rocks into our satchels. "Oh come on! Don't look at me like that! Explorers use Gravelrocks all the time! I'm actually surprised no one threw one at us yet!" I don't care what the Explorers do; we just killed more than a few of them. I then notice that while Boon and I were discussing rocks, Sandshrew took the liberty to sort all our items out into little groups. My opinion of him elevates a tad.
"You have three X-Eye Seeds." Sandshrew points out. Boon jumps in alarm and takes all three of them.
"Woah! Let's not get high today, alright?"
"Aw…" Sandshrew pouts. "How about the Warp Seeds? Can we warp around? You have thirty two." Thirty two Warp Seeds? Does this mean-
"BROWLEY!" Boon screams. "We have the Warp Seeds! Those Explorers pulled through for us! Oh what's this? There's still something in my bag." He shakes his satchel a couple of times and a wadded up paper drops out. I uncrumble it and see a mugshot of Wartortle with a number displayed underneath his picture. The writing which follows is in Unknown print.
WANTED: Wartortle of Exploration Team Shellfire
For Shirking Work, Running Away, and Not Using "Take Job" on Exploration Team task list.
Suspected withholding of mission reward shares.
Mission Level: A
Wartortle is believed to have found a stash of Joy and Golden Seeds.*
Caution advised due to level, though expect rookie tactics.
*Misinformation has spread that Wartortle found Pure Seeds. This is false. Remember—Pure Seeds warp Explorers to the stairway in Mystery Dungeons.
I hand the paper to Boon whom smiles at the sight of it.
"Yay!" He cheers. "We're not the only ones they want! But after today I think they're going to switch priorities." Boon frowns. "Eugh, and one of those Max Elixirs down there tasted like a cockroach-not that I know what those taste like. Changing subjects! How about we get to Timburr Town? We're already between the Mystery Dungeon and town! I can tell you about the time I had a wart on one of my check pouches!
"Ewwww." Sandshrew groans as Boon and I pick up our things and move on.
Along the walk Sandshrew decides he wants to serenade us with a song.
"I like—to dig holes. It is—really fun.
If you—like it too, won't you… sing with me?"
Boon, the ever impulsive one, joins in with lyrics of his own.
"I eat—peppers all day. When I'm—not getting paid.
Screw you—mom and dad. I'm my own man! With my own plan! MEAT!" He giggles and pokes me in the ribs. "Come on Browley! Give us your verse!" No. Both he and Sandshrew put on the biggest puppy dog eyes they can at my shaking head.
"Pleeeeeeeaaaaaassssssseeeeeeee?" They beg in unison. I couldn't come up with words on the fly even if I wanted to.
"Doesn't have to be great! Just sing from your heart!" Sandshrew says. God, that is so corny.
"C-can we t-t-tell stories instead?" I request. Boon and Sandshrew think it over for a grand total of five seconds before flatly saying
"No."
"Come on, it's really easy!" Boon encourages. "It's 'Bum Bum—Bum Bum Bum, Bum Bum—Bum Bum Bum-"
"No no no." Sandshrew says. "He's got the hard part. Sounds better with more Pokémon." Boon's ears twitch.
"Then why are we asking him to sing it solo?"
"Because we sang our parts. His fault for not joining in sooner!"
"But then I'd have to sing the hard part!"
"A-g-g-gain. Stories?" I offer. "C-Canterbury Tales?"
"What's a Cantor Berry?" Sandshrew asks.
"Actually I think he said Candle Berry." Boon argues. "Probably a fire-type thing."
"How do I know what that is?" Sandshrew says. "I'm a ground-type!" Boon wags his finger at me.
"He's got a point, Browley. How are we supposed to know what a Candle Berry is?" I wish this island had snipers.
"I got a great idea!" Sandshrew proclaims. "Why don't we swap stories?" Boon gasps.
"Why didn't any of us think of that? Browley! What do you think?" I think I'm going to kill one of you slowly and painfully in a dark alley somewhere. "I call dibs on first!" The Pikachu dramatically clears his throat and unweaves his story.
"It was a cold day there in Paneramina; the snow was drifting from the heavens without any sign of ever letting up. The snow was so heavy, in fact, that it piled up to a stunning three feet! That's taller than plenty of Pokémon! One wrong step and one could sink beneath the white powder, never to be seen from again. It was around noon that little Pamela the Mudkip-"
"Wouldn't she just be called Mudkip?" Sandshrew interrupts.
"No." Boon firmly answers. "I'm naming her Pamela. Trust me; it'll be easier for you in the long run."
"But what if I forget what species-"
"AS I WAS SAYING, around noon little Pamela the Mudkip was on her way to see her friend in the next town-"
"Like me?"
"Yes. Little Pamela the Mudkip was on her way to see her friend in the next town-"
"Who was her friend?"
Boon's ears twitch but he keeps his smile. "I'm getting to that. Little Pamela the Mudkip was on her way-"
"It'd help me relate if her friend was an Aron. Is her friend an Aron?"
The Pikachu's smile falls and he lets out a sigh of frustration. "Sandshrew, every time you interrupt me you're breaking my concentration-you're distracting me, and it will take time to get back to where I was before. Do you understand?"
"…I understand." Sandshrew replies after a moment of silence. "How much longer till we get there?"
At that moment we reach the top of a hill and can see Timburr Town just below—déjà vu. Boon groans in annoyance.
"Aw! But I didn't get to tell my story!" He whines.
For the second time we enter Timburr Town from the south gate. Watchog is there as predicted to greet us in his heavily accented English.
"Boon! And Browley ta! Yous alright! And ya brought Sandshrew wit ya!"
Our escort waves, Boon smiles, and I nod my head. I'm worn out from the Explorer assault in those mines. A little R&R would do the spot. I'd hate to say this, but I think I'm game for Dungeon crawling.
"Ya'll must be tired. Yer boss iz givin yous a break for today! I don't know whut ya two been up ta but I reckon it musta been somethin' fierce!"
"You could say that." Boon said through the side of his mouth.
"Aron!" Sandshrew squeals in delight.
"Sandshrew!" Aron squeals back. "And Joltik and Chespin! The whole gang is here!"
"That's right!" Joltik says. "We kick tail!" Huh. I expected to hear that line from an Explorer first.
"Anyone want to play Steal the Bacon? With real bacon?" The Pokémon I can now identify as Chespin asks. That game actually sounds like a lot of fun. Oh well, playing with children would be too aggravating. The children run off to play leaving our escort mission complete for the time being. All that's left to do now is wait for Sandshrew's parents to pick up their kid and we are done. We still got paid, so there isn't much of a reason to worry about the kid anymore.
"Step right up, step right up!" Shouts a red bird-person in one of the stalls. "The Silver Spike Throwing Gallery is back open for business!"
"I didn't know you weren't open, Blaziken." Boon says approaching the Pokemon.
"Unfortunately I needed a new target painted." Blaziken explained to the Pikachu. "Smeargle was a great help with that."
"Oh I bet." Boon replied laughing. "Hey Browley, Wanna try some silver spike throwing?"
"W-what's a silver spike?" I ask.
"Well they're spikes, and they're made of silver. And you throw them." Boon quips.
Meh, what the hell? I'll give it a go. I've always wanted to throw knives, and this may be the closest thing I can get to that. I step up the stand and climb on top of a box graciously placed for smaller Pokémon like myself to stand upon for a better-did I just refer to myself as a Pokémon? Shit that's bad. Blaziken smiles and places three pointed objects with blunt ends on the counter; judging from the way they shine I assume they are made of metal.
"There you are! Three silver spikes! That'll be 100 Poké!" That's not too expensive… right? I'm still not entirely certain what the value of a single Poké is actually worth. I don't think it is much. Boon counts up the required amount out of our coins of different value and places the money on the counter, which Blaziken eagerly scoops up and places in a jar. She steps out of the way to allow me throwing room but doesn't hold back on questions. "Have you ever thrown spikes before? If you'd like, I can provide lessons for an additional 25 Poké." No thank you. I already watched SpongeBob and mastered the bubble blowing technique when I was a kid. Don't judge me. I pick up one of the spikes and eye the target. It is a simple wooden circle painted red and white with a single dot in its center. Basic but effective.
"You can do it, Browley! I have full confidence in you!" Boon cheers. I toss the first spike—it veers off course to the right of the center and bounces off the target. "I have mostly full confidence in you!" I pick up the second spike with the intent to get it right this time. Nobody gets it on their first go, right? To my discontent I miss a second time. Third time's the charm? Boon doesn't even bother cheering me this time. It is good to know he thinks I can do this. With eagle eyes I bore holes into the target's center, keeping a tight grip on my final spike. I am going to get this. I swear this time I am going to get this. I channel my Zen and swing my arm forward, letting the silver spike sail through the air into the wall off target. Well, I fucking tried.
"N-n-nother go." I say. Boon raises an eyebrow and pays another 100 Poké.
"You do realize I'm only going to pay up for so long, right?" He asks. I just need another set, that's it. Blaziken puts another trio of silver spikes on the counter and gives me room to retry.
"Only 25 Poké for lessons." She restates. Three more times Boon has to put another 100 Poké down until he refuses to pay any more.
"Just take the stinking lessons! You're going to blow all our cash at this rate!" He scolds.
"Only 25 Poké for-"
"F-fine! P-p-pay for th-the lessons." Boon gives Blaziken 25 Poké and tosses our money bag into his satchel to prevent any further spending. Blaziken places three more silver spikes down and tells me to pick one up. I do so.
"Very good." She says. "Now position your thumb along the back side and your middle finger on the edge. Put the butt of the spike just above the center of your palm. We call this a 'cupping grip'." But I only have four fingers? What's my middle finger supposed to be? Maybe if I don't count the thumb… I follow her steps to the best of my ability but she frowns. "Don't clench your hand. You need a relaxed grip and relaxed release." Alright then… I loosen my grip on the silver spike a bit and wait for lessons to continue. Blaziken smiles in approval and picks one of the spikes up. "You need to have a flipping movement with your wrist—like a slap." She says flicking her wrist in example. She allows her movements to slow in an effort to show me precisely what the movement should look like in slow motion. "Cock your wrist back and then let it come forward. Be sure to cock your wrist back before every throw." Blaziken then lobs a silver spike into the target, sticking the bullseye with perfect accuracy. Then she yanks the spike out and repeats the throwing motion without allowing her projectile to leave her hand.
"Your finger should lightly stroke your spike on release." She instructs. "As it slides out of your hand, let your fingertip brush it; this will help straightening. You're a beginner, so try not to think too hard about it. Just let the action come naturally." Come naturally… reminds me a bit of Moves. I suppose most things tend to be that way in life though. The advice is always 'let it happen naturally and practice, practice, practice.' Blaziken makes another perfect throw. "Remember: your throw is more similar to a sling than a throw. Imagine scooping up snow and slinging it. I know, what does a fire-type born with no hands know about slinging snow? What does a fire-type born with no hands know about throwing spikes?" Born with no hands? What does that mea-oh yeah. Evolution. I guess Pokemon can grow extra appendages by evolving? Sounds more like a mutation to me. "If your spike is missing with the point up that generally means you need to flip your wrist harder or you're releasing the spike too early. I think you can understand what it means if the point is down." I nod; yeah I think I get it now. "Now I want you to give it another try."
Utilzing her lessons, I toss the silver spike into the target and it manages to stick in along the edge. That's a start.
"You see? You're already learning." Blaziken praises. "Try to get closer to the center on this next throw." I pick up the other spike and throw again with a slight adjustment to my shoulder. I miss the center, but hit only two stripes away. Out of five stripes total that is pretty good.
"Browley! I just realized something!" Boon exclaims. "We still need to give Kangaskhan our Warp Seeds."
"Take care then." Blaziken says over her shoulder as she collects the silver spikes from the target.
"We will!" Boon replies as we walk towards the storage shed.
"Oh my heavens! You pumpkins are alright after all!" Kangaskhan says clutching her chest. "Heavens, children, you've had me worried sick! When Infernape went to find you I could only assume the worst!"
"Sorry for scaring you." Boon apologized. "We ran into an… issue." By 'issue' you mean an overpowered turtle. "We're alright though! And we helped out some miners! Anyways. we got the Warp Seeds! All twenty-five of them!" The Pikachu dumps the seeds on Kangaskhan's counter and her worried face turns cheerful.
"Well I'll be! Thank you!" She bends over and tickles her baby who coos in happiness. "We can finally get those Kangaskhan Rocks pumping iron again, can't we little kangie?" The brown bear-roo reaches in a drawer behind her counter and pulls out a pile of coins. Poké—nice. "It's all yours for a job well done." Boon graciously takes the money and stashes it in his satchel.
"Thanks!" He says. "See you later Miss Kangaskhan! You too baby Kangaskhan!"
"Anytime!" Kangaskhan waves as we leave her stand.
"Pikachu and Charmander? How's it chilling?" I hate you so much, Simisage.
"Boon." My ally corrects. "It's Boon, and my friend is Browley." Simisage shrugs.
"I'll get it one of these days." Boon telepathically informs me he's been messing it up for about five or six years already. Sounds like a lost cause to me. We might as well embrace being called by species name for this one. "What are you buying? What are you selling?"
"Do you have any Jichi Peppers?" Boon asks.
"A-a-any c-cool Orbs or ssssseeds?"
Simisage smiles and drops a bag of goodies on the counter. "Yes—for both. Health, Lob, and All Protect are on today's Wonder Orb menu. I recommend the All Protect Orb; invincibility for 600 Poké." Deal.
"Can we also have three peppers?" Boon turns to me. "Do you want any?" I shake my head and he fist pumps. "More for me!"
675 Poké down the drain. Our next stop is the library, where I return the Pokédex and Jichi history book. Just like last time Boon refuses to go inside with me, and just like last time the librarians don't even bother to say hello to me. It's just a simple matter of
"I-I-I'm returning th-these."
"Whatever." And I'm back outside with a lighter bag.
"Is that all our chores?" Boon asks. I nod in confirmation. "Great! So um… what do you want to do?" I don't want to stand around all day or take another nap, that's for sure. Dungeon work it is.
"W-w-want to g-go to a Dungeon?" I stutter. Boon tilts his head in confusion.
"Don't you hate those?"
"B-bored. Tired. N-n-need easy work."
"Fair enough. We need more money anyways. Twelve Poké is not a good amount to have." He says shrugging his shoulders. "Come on, there's probably some more jobs up in the bulletin board. We can check out the papers while we're there too." So we swing by the Post Office and check out the board. To my disappointment there is nothing up at the moment, but Boon finds something noteworthy in the newspaper. "Hey check this out!" He hands me the paper and points at an article. "It says here Explorers are mysteriously dropping like flies in District 3." So what? We've been killing crap-loads of the dumbasses. "I don't think our work in the mines is what this is talking about. Otherwise it would have actually said they were dying underground. Something else is out there killing them." Wartortle is being chased by the Explorers. Could he be the one responsible or could it be someone else? If it's someone else I need to be careful. Coming face-to-face with a serial killer does not sound like fun.
"Good evening, boys." Infernape greets from the doorway. Jeez, stop dropping in on us like that. He walks to the stack of papers and picks one up. "I thought I would find you here when I saw Sandshrew playing with the children." The fire monkey flips through the pages looking rather disinterested with everything he finds. "You haven't made the papers yet, I'm afraid. But this mysterious homicide may be exactly what you need for the time being. I wouldn't suggest investigating the matter, however. Instead be thankful something else is around for Jichi to recognize as the killer."
"Do you know what's going on with that?" Boon asks. Infernape snorts.
"No. It isn't my business to know either. I'll allow detectives to do their jobs." Boon should leave the discussion at that, but he doesn't.
"But isn't it your job as an on-call Rescuer to-"
"No. I assist Pokémon in dangerous situations caused by nature. I do not track down criminal Pokémon. Any other questions?" I have one.
"Know a-a-any-th-th-thi-thing about Brooke Hotel?" Infernape appears surprised by my question.
"I was being sarcastic about questions. No I don't know concrete information about Brooke Hotel, although the name sounds familiar. It may be a high-end suite in the capital—perhaps you should ask there. The capital is located not far past Jichi's jaw; you will see it a mile away."
I had a feeling Infernape would be able to point me in the right direction. He isn't certain about his facts, but he does have enough of a clue to assist either way. If Brooke is not in the capital, then someone there should know where. It took a couple of days and underground sidetracking, but at long last I am finally getting somewhere. There is actually a place I can mark on a map to get to. At this rate I'll be off this rock in no time. The longest periods I'll deal with is travel time.
"EEEEEEEEEEEEKKK! SOMEBODY HELP ME!"
Everyone jumps at the scream for help.
"Holy crap! That sounds like it came from outside!" Boon says. We all rush outside the Post Office where we spot a sizable hole in the northern wall leading to District 2. Standing there carrying a struggling Chespin in his arms is none other than Wartortle. Son of a bitch, would he just leave us alone already!?
"Ha! Your wall fucking blows!" He giggles.
"Turtle, you listen to me and you listen well." Infernape growls. "That is a child you are holding captive. You let him go right now or so help me I will-"
Wartortle blows a raspberry in response. "I'm calling the shots! Your town can stay the fuck out of this!" He locks eyes with Boon and me before continuing. "You're move, bitches!" Wartortle flips his tongue showing he has a seed underneath. In an instant he swallows it and runs off in remarkable speed, leaving a trail of kicked up grass fragments in his wake.
"Get him!" Infernape shouts shoving Boon and I forward to help him pursue Wartortle. Wasting no time we sprint after the kidnapper knowing full well as long as that seed is affecting him we'll never be able to catch up. We run through grass, bushes, dirt, off small cliffs, everything to at least try to minimize the distance as much as possible. The only way we are able to keep track of his path is by the flying green trail he leaves behind. That is another thing to worry about; when Wartortle slows down his flying feet are not going to be slicing up blades of grass and launching them into the sky. Then it will be impossible to tell where he went.
"Shit! Shit-shit-shit-shit-shit-shit-shit-shit!" Boon swears running as fast as he can on all fours. He must be worried sick about Chespin; they are from the same town after all. For me I'm chasing after a child I don't know nor particularly care about, but if he ends up hurt Timburr Town and possibly others are going to be furious with me. I do not need that complication.
"Calm down and keep running! We are not going to lose Chespin!" Infernape yells, the fire from his head blazes so fiercely it hurts to look at. Life has a way of flipping the bird at me—up ahead on a dirt path is a group of four Pokémon wearing scarves around their necks, and one carries a satchel strapped across its chest. Species recognition is sent to me though my badge: Skorupi, Teddiursa, Nuzleaf, and carrying the supplies is a Zangoose.
"Halt!" The red and white Pokemon commands holding out an open palm. "We're an Exploration Team bringing you to justice!" Fucking hell, not now!
"Keep running!" Boon's boss barks without hesitation. Both Boon and I ignore the Explorer's demand as per Infernape ordered and continue charging until we are a hair's length away. I Ember, Boon Thunder Shocks, Zangoose falls, we hop over his body and keep running. My breath is starting to leave me now but I can't slow down lest Wartortle completely gets away. I swallow hard and lean my head forward feeling like I'm stuck in a marathon.
"The trail! It's going away!" Boon shouts in dismay. Sure enough the freshly tossed grass fragments are closer and closer to where they came from. It isn't long until there is nothing left to follow anymore and I slow to a halt. The son of a bitch got away… "No! No! He couldn't have-" Boon keeps running for a moment, stopping about three meters away from me.
"FUCK!" Infernape shouts to the heavens as he too ceases running. "Mother fucking Quick Seeds!" He paces back and forth heavily in distraught flailing his arms in aggravation. "Where could he have gone? Where could he have gone?" Boon walks to a nearby pile of rocks and rests his face on them.
"No…" He mutters between gasps of breath, his ears drooping. "Poor Chespin… why?"
"MMMPPPPHHH!" Boon jumps away from the rock formation at the sound of the muffled scream. "MMMMPPPPPPHHH! HHHEEEMMMMPPPP MFFFF!" Infernape stops walking in circles and runs to the rock formation.
"Is someone in there?" Boon asks the rocks. "Guys? I'm not going crazy am I?"
"No." Infernape answers pressing his ear to the top stone. "I heard it too."
"HEEEMMPPPPP MFFFF! MMFFFF NFFFFF IFFFFF CHFFFFPNNNN!"
"It's Chespin!" The boss shouts in relief. He leans in close to the rocks and shouts as loud as he can to the Pokémon trapped within. "Are you alright in there, Chespin?" The ape then presses an eager ear to the rocks and Boon does the same.
"NNFFF! THFFFFSSS WWWWMMMM IMMMM HHHHRRRRRR! M CMMMPH MMMMM MMMHHMMPHHMP!"
"Fuck!" Boon says. "Browley, he's in a circle of rocks and it's filled with water! There's enough of an air pocket for now but-"
"Unless we can move this top rock he'll either suffocate or sink." Infernape grimly finishes. "And look who's here." I turn around and see oodles of Explorers approaching us.
"SHIT! It's them!" A Flareon exclaims turning to his fellow Explorers. "Listen everyone, this rescue is going to be a little more complicated than we thought! The murders are here and they got help! Do not let those three Pokemon get to the client before we do!"
"Right!" Answered the ensemble of Explorers. Infernape immediately gripped the top rock and heaved.
"Hold…them…off." He ordered as he grunted.
"I don't think they're going to listen to a word we say." Boon says dropping to all fours. "We have to fight. Again." Another defense holdout? I can hardly contain my excitement… Chespin's muffled screams don't stop bleeding out of the rocks.
"Everyone ready?" Flareon asks the Explorers as they fall into team formations. I search through my satchel and find the All Protect Orb I bought. I'm a little surprised I have to use it so quickly. "Now!"
I slam down the Orb and when it shatters Infernape, Boon and I are covered in a layer of blue light. The Explorers barrel towards us all at once, shooting beams of concentrated energy one after another. One such beam comes for my throat and I instinctively flinch when it hits. Yet there is no pain nor is there any recoil from what should be a life ender. Well I'll be damned; that Orb works better than I thought. I'm a fucking tank! Boon utilizes his Quick Attack pinball strategy once more, making sound effects from his mouth every time he knocks someone down. No longer fearing death I charge head on into the Explorers and Ember those not already dead from having their innards crushed by a Pikachu.
"Lightning bolt! Lightning bolt! Lightning bolt!" Boon chants switching to Thunder Shocks. The Exploration Teams attempts to defend themselves from our onslaught are futile. It takes little effort to kill each and every Pokémon that attempts attack us. Similar to in the mine, Boon is quite selective with the Pokémon he identifies for me. Why should he bother? They are just going to be dead in moments. This means I'm left counting bodies and creating more. That thing dies, that bug one dies, is that a white squirrel? Dead. Just killed a Technicolor blur of Explorers; oh wait, so did Boon. He sends me a telepathic message that he's running low on PP and to cover him while he searches a bag for Max Elixir. Nobody has a chance to hurt him and Boon does the same for me.
"Explorers! Fall back and regroup!" A Volbeat commands. I hate how he looks. He looks stupid. I burn him with extreme prejudice. I could have sworn this was going to be a tougher battle due to the time limit with Chespin and lack of cover. Turns out I was wrong.
"Yeah! You'd better run!" Boon shouts at the Explorers as they retreat roughly thirty meters. We take the breather to scavenge bodies for supplies. Plenty of seeds and Wonder Orbs are up for the taking. I get the idea to take new Explorer badges for personal use and grab three; one for me, one for Boon, and one for Infernape. It'll help to have constant updates from him on the situation. "Great idea." Boon compliments taking his new badge and dropping the old. He runs to his boss and holds out the extra badge. "Here sir! Browley thinks it'll be good for you to have one too!"
"Thank you." Infernape says grabbing the gift. "This rock is heavy. I've pushed it enough to allow Chespin air, but there isn't enough room for him to climb out yet. I need more time."
I send him a message of acknowledgement as I sort through the Orbs. Boon joins me. For the ones neither of us are sure of, we send a mental image to Infernape for him to identify. With his help it is as if there is a little description box next to each Orb. I love these badges more and more. When I leave this island I'm taking some with me for sure.
"Are you fucking me!?" An Explorer yells in exasperation. "Two Pokémon! Two! A Charmander and a Pikachu! Our assault alone has a body count of thirty two!"
"It's that protection!" Another blames. "Anybody got a Move that can break it?" Protection can be broken?
"No need. It should wear off in a couple more seconds. Then we attack." It can wear off?
"What if we used Protect? Someone has to have that Move!" It's a Move?
"Because none of us do. Just get in formation and prepare for another run." The blue glow enveloping the three of us dissipates at that moment. It was fun while it lasted… Alright, I think I'll use the new Quick Orb. All these other ones suck! I do not need to turn a spot of water into dirt. Maybe another time that'll be useful, but not now.
"Flareon! Their protection is gone! Permission to engage?"
"Granted." Come at me. I activate the Quick Orb and am ready for another wave.
We all charge at each other but Boon and I's increased speed gives us combat superiority. Both of us are weaving in-between Explorers and either shocking or burning them as we zip pass. Three down. Six down. Nine down.
"We're taking a beating!" That understatement is a purple cat's last words as it is dispatched with haste by a Thunder Shock/Dragon Rage combo. I use its body to shield myself from an onslaught of purple needles fired out of purple snake's mouth which Boon decimates after. Loads of purple there…
"Items!" An Explorer orders. "Items for fuck's sake!" A Mankey jumps on top of Boon and shoves a seed into the Pikachu's mouth. His eyes clench shut and he falls to the ground, laying there with a snot bubble coming out of his nose. Infernape sends me the telepath that Boon's been hit with a Sleep Seed and will need to be defended until he recovers. Fucking more defense! I roast the Mankey and set up a mental perimeter around my incapacitated ally. Two pink balls with a swirly pattern on their foreheads get their faces Scratched apart as I continue to guard Boon. Come on… hurry up and get back in the fight!
"Stand back!" Shouts a blue frog-thing. "I'm tossing a Blast Seed!" Fuck no. The Pokémon known as Poliwhirl is electrocuted out of action.
"Eugh, my head!" Boon groans standing back up. "Oh hey Browley. What'd I miss?"
"Blast Seed out!" The mentioned seed sails above towards us but is roasted away in midair by another Pokémon. Infernape jumps in front of us with Chespin riding on his back.
"You Explorers need to learn something called self-restraint!" He screams. He unleashes a twister of flames out of his mouth, spraying the entire horde of Explorers in searing hot fire. Their twitching bodies indicate they aren't dead, but at least we aren't in a battle anymore. "Pathetic."
"That was sick!" Chespin cheers. "And look at all the Pokémon Boon and the Charmander fainted!" Fainted… right.
"Chespin and I are returning to Timburr Town. I suggest the two of you continue your search for Wartortle. There is another town up ahead, so bunk there when it gets late." Infernape instructs.
"Sir?" Boon asks. "We should probably go back to Timburr Town so Sandshrew's parents don't think we ditched him there.
"I will handle it." Infernape assured. The fire monkey runs back the way we came, hopping over body after body.
"Let's get out of here before these Explorers get back up." Boon suggests. "It kind of makes me wish they were dead, as bad as that sounds." Leaving doesn't sound like a bad idea. I nod and we walk away from the battleground. "Hey, I've been thinking." Boon says as we hike. "The Explorers are looking for Wartortle too, and they're more experienced with tracking down Pokémon. If they run in any sensible form, they have a camp set up with information on file." I'm not certain they do run in a sensible form. It took them this long to try using their items on us. Maybe they have rules in place for that type of combat. Stupid, but makes sense. "I say we find that place, steal their info, and go after the fucker ourselves. Who knows? They might even have something on this Brooke thing you're looking for." I'm surprised Boon is suggesting what will essentially be an assault on more Explorers. It's obvious enough he's adapting to killing in self-defense stupidly quickly. Now he wants to hit them first! The Pikachu chuckles. "Don't know what Brooke Hotel is or why you want to find it, buy you're the human. It's bound to be important somehow."
"Where are we?" Boon asks during a pit stop has he looks at our spread out map of District 2. "I don't recognize any of this. I think we're in another District." Well shit, I don't have a map of another. Don't tell me we're lost. My ally looks around for a moment and points at a sizable hill. "There! That looks like a good lookout. Yeah, we can probably get a good view of where we are." We race to the top and our jaws drop at what we see.
We aren't on a hill, we're on a cliff. There is quite the sizable drop from our altitude to the water below, a drop easily long enough to break every bone in a human's body even with the water. We aren't in human bodies—Boon's a tiny mouse and I'm a similarly sized lizard. If a human couldn't survive that drop, surely we couldn't. I am forced to stop looking down as the height is making me become dizzy. The only way forward is on a rickety wooden bridge connecting to another cliff. Scratch that, a cliff-side which bends at such an angle we can only see a portion of it from our location. We don't even get the fortune of reaching the top. I take a deep breath and put my face into my palms. Was this worth it? Was this really worth it? There had to be another way. I take another look around and see that no, there is a stupid wall of rock funneling towards this cliff's edge and by extension towards this bridge. We'll have to cross the bridge and shimmy along the cliff-face's ledges, large and small. Not even all the ledges were connected; even from this distance I can see bridges connecting ledge to ledge. Fucking Wartortle. I'm going to throttle him.
Boon popped his knuckles but the look on his face displayed the same anxiety I felt. "This doesn't look too bad, right? Heh heh…" He swallowed hard and slouched in defeat. "Oh who am I kidding? This is scary as fuck." On the cliff-side's ledges I see more groups of four Pokémon carefully making their way along. These Explorers sure love to get in my way. Boon groans when he spots them. "And fighting will only make this ten times scarier. Perfect."
Author's Note:
That's another chapter out.
I noticed I got Pure Seeds and Joy Seeds mixed up in an earlier chapter. I tried to avoid going back and editing that by making it a story element.
The song Sandshrew and Boon sing to the tune of Amp Plains from Explorers of Sky. Hey, if ScytheRider can make lyrics to those songs then so can I! I understand if they sound kind of silly, I literally wrote them down at that part of the chapter.
SpongeBob is a word officially recognized by Microsoft Word's spellcheck. The more you know.
So apparently with X and Y Pikachu's learnset has changed, not only altering when the Pokémon can learn certain moves, but what order they can be learned as well. I was going off the Gen V learnset, but this chapter switches to the Gen VI one, canceling out Boon's Growl and replacing it with Play Nice. I don't know, his PEN15 (I really need to make an official non-joke name for that) learned the move while fighting Helioptile?