"Son of the Joker"

By Loki Palmer

Author's Note: Harry Potter and all related characters belong to J.K. Rowling. I'm glad everyone enjoyed that first chapter.

Chapter 2

Sirus, Harry and James arrived within a hallway.

"Where are we, Dad?"

"This, son, is your new home at 12 Grimmauld Place. The Black Family has lived here for generations upon generations. Yeah, it may seem dark and it needs a good cleanup, but it's still home sweet home. Come along and I'll show you the Black Family Tapestry."

The Black Family Tapestry was a wall-sized family tree.

"This tapestry updates itself with each addition to the Family. There's my name .. a line leading to Lily, your Mother ... boy, it was such an annoyance to the Family to have a Muggleborn join ... and, underneath us, you see, Harry, is you. Harry Damien Diabolitus Black. Hold on just a minute ... does the last name Granger ring a bell, James?"

"Nope. Harry? Kid, you'd better close your mouth lest some insects decide to camp there."

Harry glared at his godfather's lopsided grin. "I haven't told you my entire story, have I, Dad?"

"No, son, you have not. You looked stunned there for a minute."

"I was, Dad. How do I explain who she is?"

"How about we go into the dining room, sit down, and you can tell me about her from the beginning."

They moved into the dining room. "So, where did you first meet Hermione?"

"It was on the Hogwarts Express. She was looking around for a toad that a boy named Neville had lost."

"Love at first sight?" said James.

Harry shook his head. "Sorry to disappoint you, godfather, but no."

"Aw, shoot. Continue. Into what House did the Sorting Hat place her?"

"She went into Gryffindor, same as me."

"YEAH!" James and Sirius gave each other high fives.

"That was where James and I went during our time at Hogwarts. I was the first Gryffindor Black in a long time."

"Where did the other Blacks go?"

"Slytherin," said Sirius with a shudder.

"The Sorting Hat said to me that I could do well in Slytherin, but I pleaded with it, so it placed me in Gryffindor."

"So, what kind of person is Hermione?"

"She loves books, she's brilliant ... she's saved my life numerous times ... while I saved her life at least once."

"Quick question, son: is she a redhead?"

"No, Dad, her hair is chestnut brown."

"Whew. At least my son doesn't have an Oedipus complex."

"Oedipus what?" thought Harry.

"An oedipus complex, Harry," said Hermione in his mind, "comes from the Greek myth of Oedipus, who killed his father and married his mother. It is Sigmund Freud's term for the male's tendency to be attracted to someone like their mother. In your case, Ginny Weasley."

Harry gave a mental shudder. "Thanks for the image, Hermione. I will be having nightmares about that idea for a while."

"No problem."

"Harry? Harry?"

"What is it?"

"You blanked out on us for a couple seconds. You okay?"

"I'm fine ... I just had a brief mental conversation with Hermione."

"A mental conversation?" Sirius and James said.

"Yeah ... why do you look so shocked?"

"Since when did these conversations start?"

"Since ... the day after my 13th birthday."

"When was the first time you saved her life?"

"Halloween of my first year. Hermione had tried to help out my friend Ron Weasley, and Ron insulted her, so she went crying into the bathroom. That night, Professor Quirrell, our Defense professor, said there was a troll in the dungeons. I took Ron with me to collect Hermione from the bathroom, but the troll got there first. We didn't kill it, but we knocked it out with its club."

"What was the spell, and who cast it?"

"It was Wingardium Leviosa, and Ron cast it. He was having trouble with it earlier, that's why Hermione was helping him."

James snorted. "Either this Weasley kid has a slow time developing, or he's dumber than the troll he knocked out."

"Maybe so, James, maybe so ... I smell a setup."

Harry's eyes narrowed. "What do you mean, a setup?"

"Don't you think Hermione would feel grateful to the one who knocked out the troll?"

"Why should she feel grateful to Ron? He is the one who insulted her in the first place!"

"That's right, son. You cannot put someone's life in danger and save them from it, hoping to get a magical debt owed to you out of it. Magic doesn't work that way. Even though Ron knocked out the troll, since you went in there to save Hermione, you are the hero. Her hero, Harry. You say she saved your life as well?"

"Yes ... during my first Quidditch match ..."

"What position?" said James.

"Seeker ... youngest in a century."

Sirius ruffled Harry's hair. "That's my boy. Continue."

"My broom started to lurch, threatening to buck me off. Thinking Snape was the one behind the cursing of my broom, Hermione set fire to his robe."

This set off James and Sirius to uproarious laughter. As it calmed down a couple minutes later, they were wiping tears of mirth from their eyes.

"When are we going to meet Hermione, Harry?" said James.

"Yeah, son, any female who can set fire to old Snivelly's robes to save you is a keeper in my book!"

"Before we meet this charming young lady, I think we should take him out to get some new clothes, Siri."

"Agreed, James. We shall take him out for a classic shopping trip, but we need to stop by Gringotts to talk with the Goblins. No offense, Harry, but your casual clothes leave much to be desired. We will need to amp your wardrobe up to LADY KILLER level so Hermione can't resist you."

"Dad, what do you mean? She already can't resist me!"

Sirius laughed. "Spoken like a true son of mine! You still need to be able to impress her Father."

"She is pretty, right?" said James. "A general rule says there is an inverse relation between brains and beauty."

"If she is beautiful, it may raise how hard the Father will fight to make sure she has someone worthy of his approval."

"Hey, wait, nobody said there would be fighting involved!"

Sirius chuckled. "Relax, son, I was being metaphorical. It means he will give you a hard time ... you know, busting your balls a little, you understand me?"

"Doesn't her opinion count for anything?"

"In this patriarchal society of ours, I would say ... not much, if any. Since you have saved her life, that will count for much, so don't feel too discouraged. Out of curiosity – not that it matters diddlysquat to me – what's her background?"

"She's Muggleborn, and to answer Godfather's question, she's gorgeous."

"Where would she be on a scale from one to ten?"

"One being, 'The face that launched a thousand ships – the other way,' and ten being, 'Good giggity, I think I've died and gone to Heaven!'?"

Harry's only answer was a heavy blush and a wide grin.

"I think we have our answer, James."

"She's a Ten! WOO-HOO!"

"Quite." Sirius thought for a few moments. "I think I know what's causing this strange phenomenon you're experiencing. Have you heard of a Bond?"

Harry shook his head.

"I'm not surprised, son; few have heard of it, for it is a rare Magic. To put it in simple terms, a Bond is a Magical manifestation of what Muggles call a Match made in Heaven. A male and a female who are perfect for each other and who are blessed with a Bond will start to meld in mind and magic. Of course, they will meld in the body at some point – giggity – but that is not required for the Bond's completion. It will mature on its own time, given enough time and nurture – often around the time of puberty."

Harry sent this information to Hermione. "Hmm," she thought back to him, "it makes sense that I've never heard of it. When will I see you again, Harry?"

"I hope it's soon. My dad and godfather want to meet you."

He could sense some minor confusion on her end. "What do you mean, Harry?"

"Hermione, trust me on this. My father's alive and I'm not crazy. We have a couple stops to make first, then we will come to see you."

"As much of a relief it is to know the explanation behind this, I hope to see you soon as well."

"You will, Hermione. Don't you worry."

Author's Note: Another chapter done. Read and review!

Smiles,

Loki Palmer