AN: I had a choice with this about whether to show Marie's descent back down into being a mutant in slow, painful, angsty manner, or sort of skip over it, much like I did the time when she and Logan first got together.
I elected to skip it. I think I've shown that she is very upset with her mutation returning and the rest I can tell in flashbacks, without making everyone depressed! :)
This is the third entirely different version of this chapter that I've written. *chuckle* I think I like this version the best.
Hope you like this chapter.
O o o o o o o o o o O
Time marched on like it always does, and Marie had no choice in her reversion from human back to mutant. She started going by Rogue again, to everyone except Logan. She would always be Marie to him, and she didn't want that to change.
In the few weeks she had before her mutation returned fully, she spent every possible moment with Logan, trying to get her fill on human touch. They learned that if they would separate, even just slightly, they could go back to whatever they were doing if they felt the pull, at least while it was still weak.
It felt like a clock ticking down the moments until her death. The amount of time spent in physical contact was getting shorter and shorter before the pull started. Finally, it had fully remanifested and she could only touch Logan for moments before her cursed skin began trying to pull his life from him.
Charles was meeting with her several times a week; his concern for her mental state had not abated. She still was considering that suicide might be a better choice than the loss she was dealing with. There was just so little that anyone could do to console her. They worked at trying to gain control of her power, but with little success.
Logan was frustrated; he liked enemies that he could gut and maim, not insidious emotions that could rob him of his home and happiness. The invisible force that was pulling Marie away from him was the worst kind of opponent he could have. He just wasn't used to dealing with emotional scars that were not his own. The one victory he had was that he resolutely refused to move out of their room, or let her either. He felt it was no more dangerous now than it had been before, and less so to her. Of course, her nightmares intensified and all he could do was hold her and stroke her hair and try and reassure her that someday it would get better.
O o o o o o o o o O
Scott had recovered remarkably, better than Hank had expected. He took it upon himself to help Rogue get ready to go back to being an X-Man, setting up danger room training and going over strategies. Rogue put up with it, but her heart wasn't really in it. Her heart didn't seem to be in much most days. Logan let Scott do most of the training, it was good for both of them; Scott needed to feel useful again, and Logan would have a hard time not helping Rogue.
Scott declared one night that she was ready to go back into 'active duty', so to speak. She actually felt a spark of happiness at that, running back to the room to tell Logan. He was working at their desk when she came in, grinning. "Guess what?"
The Wolverine couldn't help but grin back. He missed seeing Marie happy, truly happy. "What, darlin'?"
"I'm officially an X-Man again," she said, her cheeks flushed with pride. Of all the things she missed, this was one of the big ones. "I get to go out on missions again!"
He stood up and lifted her, twirling her in a circle, placing a quick kiss on her cheek. "Congrats. I know you wanted this." He was trying to be supportive and keep the chauvinist inside of him quiet, the part that never wanted Marie in danger. He knew that wasn't feasible or reasonable, and he also had to admit that he tended to like strong women who could challenge him.
"Makes you nervous, doesn't it?" She smirked; she knew him and how his mind worked.
"Of course it does," he said gruffly. He knew this day was coming and he had worked out a plan that would make him a hell of a lot more comfortable about it. "I wanted to talk to you about it, actually."
She gave him a warning look, "I'm not staying behind. This is one of the things I've been looking forward to."
"I know, I wouldn't ask you to do that." He brushed a lock of hair behind her ear with a gloved hand. He had taken to wearing gloves as much as she did, to make it easier to touch her. "When your powers came back, the personalities didn't, did they?"
She shook her head 'no', frowning slightly, trying to figure out where he was going with this. "It's just me in here and the memories of everyone, but no one is active anymore. She smiled slightly, "I take that back, I have a little of you. But just a little." She smiled wistfully.
He nodded, "That's what I thought." He stared into her eyes intensely and she suddenly flashed back to their first night together and the look he gave her when they started on this whole experience. "I want to be with you."
She rolled her eyes with a smirk, "Fine, though Scott wouldn't have cleared me if he didn't think I was ready."
"No." He shook his head solemnly. "I want to be back inside your head, if you'll let me."
Marie pushed away from him, shocked, "What? Why? I'd hurt you! I could kill you!" She stared at him as though he had grown a second head.
He walked back over to her, continuing to meet her eyes. "First, I know having me in your head will help keep you safer. It's just a fact, and you know it." He gave her a challenging look, asking her to deny it, which she didn't. "Second, we both know how this works, and you are going to end up absorbing other people at some point. I don't want someone like Magneto to be the strongest voice in your head. I want that to be me. You belong to me." He moved even closer to her. "You'll stop it before it goes too far, I know. I'll be fine."
Marie watched him in shocked silence as he removed her gloves, then his shirt, then her shirt, finally his own gloves. "I don't think we'd have time for anything too fun, but I do intend on enjoying touching your skin again," he whispered huskily into her ear, still keeping a hair's breadth space between their bodies.
Her silence was signaling consent, so Logan finally closed the distance, embracing her in a passionate kiss, trying to touch every inch of her that he could reach before he fell unconscious; Marie followed suit, kissing him back with a desperation that broke his heart.
It wasn't long enough before he felt the pull. It hurt, but it hurt more to think of letting her go again. Despite the pain, it was the most intimate thing he could experience: willingly giving his life force and mind to another. Marie felt it as well and she began pushing away from him, the intensity frightening her. He resisted at first, not having his fill of the feel of her body again.
A few moments more though, she was stronger than him and was able to push him away, gasping for breath as he fell to the floor.
"PROFESSOR!" she screamed inside her mind. She grabbed her shirt and gloves, hastily replacing them and kneeling down to make sure Logan didn't hurt himself too badly as he twitched and convulsed in front of her. She was fighting with Logan internally for control over what to do and concentrated hard on staying herself and being there to help if needed.
"What happened?" Beast rushed in the room, kneeling down beside the fallen Wolverine, opposite Rogue.
"None of your damn business, fuzz-butt," Marie growled.
"Well, that answers that," Hank said drily.
Professor X walked in the room and surveyed the scene, sighing and shaking his head. "He did this deliberately." He looked back at the collection of students at the door, watching the proceedings, "Go back to what you were doing. Everything is fine here, correct Hank?" He looked at the blue mutant expectantly.
"His vitals seem stable. He should wake up in a few hours." Beast stood and lifted Logan's adamantium-infused skeleton with some difficulty, preparing to carry him to medlab.
Marie seemed to be struggling to gain control, then spoke up as Beast reached the door, "Please, can't he stay here? I won't touch him again." Losing control again, she growled protectively and bone claws shot out of her hands.
Hank and Charles looked at each other and Hank moved back into the room, speaking soothingly, "It's alright, you can keep him here, you know where we are if you need us." Once it was clear that Logan wasn't being taken away, Marie's claws retracted, the skin healing immediately. She took a chair and pulled it over and sat down next to the bed to await Logan's awakening and to make sure she stayed in control of her mind.
O o o o o o o O
"You have got to back off, sugar!" Rogue said with annoyance to Wolverine.
"I'm trying, but it's hard," he replied with a growl. They were circling each other in a vast open field, both of them crouched defensively with claws out, hers of bone, his of adamantium.
"It's my head," she said, feinting left then making a strike to the right, slashing down his body, the wounds healing as soon as they were created.
He growled at her drawing first blood. "I know it is, but I can't just back down. That wouldn't be me."
She rolled her eyes. "You are a stubborn ass sometimes." She winced as he scored a hit, her wound healing just as quickly as his. "I love you for it, but sometimes it can be annoying." She slipped behind him, making another slash, now across his back.
"Same to you, darlin'." He tried to get a hit in when she slipped behind him, but she was faster. He got her on the withdraw of her strike, cutting deeply into her arm. "You gotta watch your retreat. You left yourself wide open."
"Sorry I don't have as much experience fighting with these things as you do." She considered the situation. She had advantages in the way she moved, but he did have brute strength and the benefit of experience.
An idea dawned on her and she smirked as she ran her claws down her own body, removing the clothing easily. Logan's jaw dropped and he stepped forward. His claws were automatically retracting, lust clear in his eyes.
Rogue took advantage of his distraction, leaping forward and placing her claws at his throat, whispering with a grin, "I win."
"That's not fair," he chuckled.
"Hey, I use what I have to. Just remember that: my head, my rules, my decisions. I'll listen to you, but I'm the boss here." She retracted her claws as he signaled his agreement with a moan, his hands roaming on her body.
"You're the boss," he echoed, the scene fading from her mind.
O o o o o o o o o o O
Rogue opened her eyes and smiled. Everything and everyone was under control, all was copacetic. Logan looked peacefully asleep in their bed and she leaned over and kissed the top of his head, protected by hair. "You are an idiot," she said quietly, with fondness.
Logan opened his eyes, groaning slightly, "Ugh, you have one powerful kiss, woman." He smiled at her.
"You started it," she replied with a grin. "Feeling ok?"
He grunted and sat up. "Yeah, I'm fine. You ok? Got everything under control in there?" He looked pointedly at her forehead.
Marie nodded, "Yeah. It just so happens, I know some weaknesses of yours." She gave him a wicked grin.
"Like what?" Logan demanded gruffly.
"Me." They both chuckled at that and Marie lowered herself to snuggle into bed with Logan. Now she had both things she had missed about her mutation being gone – She was an X-Man again and Logan would always be with her.