Lara thinks she's a monster. She says that she is and while I can't agree, I can understand why she feels that way. Anyone who can take a human life as efficiently as she can isn't innocent any more. And now I'm worried I'm going to be the same. Does that make me a bitch? I love her. I trust her and I respect her, but I can admit that what she's capable of is scary and a little horrifying.

She says she got sick with every one. But also that it got easier for her. So it gets easier, which means you have to get less sick each time. Do I even want to become desensitized to this? Lara will walk through hell to get me and kill everyone in her way, but I'm not even sure that I could do the same for her. I know she wouldn't even want me to. I almost wish she hadn't saved me now, if this is the price she'd paid. I'm happy to be alive and with her but now I understand. And if I'd understood then what I know now, I would have wanted her to just leave me. Because I'm going to have to live with this and she's already living with something no one should ever have to!

I know Lara. She'd tell me she'd have paid that price anyway, because it was the only choice she had. I still don't have to like it. And she has to believe she still has her soul because I need her to believe that, for both of us. I don't want to lose my own! I'm so sorry that she ever went through this for me.

Things feel better the longer we talk, and I'm going to make sure she finishes this expedition, so help me...Except it seems like this place has other plans for us because it's one of those moving statues. Only it's so much faster than last time! It looks uglier too, like it's been weathered down and beaten but it still resembles a man and it's coming right at us.

"Sam, run."

I'm moving before I realize what my feet are doing. Lara's not with me. Oh god, she's being bait. I'm not going to just run away without her. I grab the rifle and charge in the direction they'd gone. Could the trick we'd used last time work? That had been a different part of Peru, and they hadn't been so violent. I'd distracted them so we could escape. I saved her butt last time, so I'm going to save her again. I can do this. She's taught me to shoot, and that thing isn't human so I don't have to feel bad about wanting to turn it into rubble.

What scares me more than a walking stone man is the blood-curdling scream coming from Lara. My blood runs thin and my stomach turns into this cold hard ball. I feel dizzy. And then the screaming stops. I run faster. Lara screams again. It's Lara and she's screaming and I hear my name and it sounds like she's begging for me. She has a vulnerable side. It's a side she's only ever shown me late at night when the dreams won't leave us alone because she hates being weak. But this is completely different. Something that's new and terrible. She's dying, this is the sound of my soul mate dying, and I've never run so fast in my life. Dread and anger push me forward.

I always wondered how someone can do something extraordinary or impossible. Especially me. Lara goes silent and suddenly it all makes sense. I come out of the trees like a dervish. It has its hand closed around Lara's head and her leg is all sorts of messed up. Just seeing that pisses me off like crazy. I throw rocks, I shoot it until I run out of bullets, then I start hitting it with the goddamn rifle. The stock splinters and then the gun breaks in my hand, but the creature drops Lara. She gurgles something. Probably trying to tell me to run. I do need to run, but to lead the stone man away from her. I have an idea and I just need to get there before it catches me.

I grab Lara's climbing axe as I pass our camp and rush towards the main crash site. The fire has mostly gone out, but I'm not here for that. I climb up onto the wreckage and wait. The ground shakes a bit as the stone man runs past, then I jump onto its back and lodge the axe into the top of its head. I twist it and hack and I probably sound like a maniac or some kind of magical girl calling out attacks. I'm not even sure what I'm shouting, but I'm gouging chunks of stone out of it's head and it's making it go slower so I shout more. It spurs me on.

I don't know how long it takes before it finally collapses with me on top of it. I hack at it a little longer just to be sure, then get up and run back towards where I'd left Lara. My legs are going to fall off but I have to get to her, I have to help her. I can't lose her. She's my anchor, my home, the one singular constant in my life.

She's laying there, limp. Her chest is rising and falling, so I slow down just a little, desperate to breathe again. Lara's leg is clearly broken, and I know I have to set it. I'm scared of what'll happen if bone has broken through her skin but it doesn't look that bad. I have to get her back to camp and cut her pants leg off before I can do anything about it. I'm grateful that she's unconscious, because there's no way I'm going to be able to be gentle, even if I have such a great line ready about getting her trousers off.

I macguyver a sled out of the remains of the chopper, and it takes me like an hour but I get her back to camp. With a fire going and the first aid kit, I can finally get a good look at her while we still have some light.

I think her nose is broken, and she's got blood in her hair and her face is bruised. I have no way to tell if there's anything wrong with her head, so I'm going to go with the idea that she's at least concussed. I should probably wake her, but I use one of the painkillers in the kit first. She'll hate me for it, but I don't want her in pain. Making her head as comfortable as possible, I check for anything that might require immediate attention. Her leg looks the worst of it but there's some bruising on her stomach so I don't know if any ribs are broken. Nothing feels wrong so I'll just have to hope and rely on her to tell me if anything is wrong. There's a danger in that, because she's Lara, and Crofts are terrible patients. I should know, I spent weeks and months with her after Yamatai.

Cutting away at her pants, I get a good look at her leg. It's twisted pretty badly and the bruising is terrible but no bones are sticking out. What would Lara do if our positions were reversed? Make a splint out of trash and straighten my leg and have to listen to me curse like a sailor. That's what Lara would do.

I can do that. I can totally do that. I just hope she doesn't wake up in the middle of this because I'm pretty sure it's going to hurt like fuck. I'll just have to curse a lot for the both of us.

I get the split made and I'm pushing her leg back together. It really kind of makes me feel squicky. It's not just the sound it makes, but the way it feels. This is someone's leg, and it's a special someone's leg and legs aren't supposed to move and feel like that! It's hard in the wrong places and soft in the wrong places and holy hell I really am cursing like a sailor.

So naturally, that's when Lara decides she wants to wake up. She regrets it almost immediately, but the morphine or whatever must be doing it's thing, because the only sound she makes is a short, mournful moan. It's heartwrenching. "Shh shh...hold on a little bit sweetie, I'm almost done. We've got to get your leg back together. How are you going to get on top of me without it?"

It makes her blush so I count that as a small win, and keep talking to distract her. It's more like babbling to distract me, but that's neither here nor there. "You should have seen it though. I wish I'd had my camera. I was badass! I hacked that thing's head right off! Thwack! Then I made this sled out of scrap metal and sweetie you really need to lay off the jaffa cakes because you're heavy." I'm joking, mostly, but Lara really does love those things. I'm buying her one the size of a car when we get back if she makes it through this.

"Okay I need you to...you're probably going to want to bite down on something. Here." I wipe off a stick and hand it to her. She's sweating now, and when she nods I grit my own teeth and push her leg together the rest of the way. That scream is something I never want to hear again as long as I live, but at least it's mercifully short.

I can tell she's upset, showing her weaknesses. But I also know she's holding it together a lot better than I would be. I'm not even sure how she's still conscious. I would have passed out again!

"Sam," she whispers. Her hand pats at mine, and her voice is breathless. "You're doing really good."

"Well one of us has to hold it together," I say, my voice sounding as strained as i feel. I am trying to not show my fear or how worried I am, and if I fail Lara doesn't let on. I'm pretty sure I failed. She holds my hand in hers and and squeezes it.

"Do you want some water?"

She nods weakly, and I have to let go of her to go get some. With my back to her I can let my emotions show on my face and I'm shaking a little, but I get the water and some food, and drag our packs closer. I help her drink, and then sit next to her. My hands want something to do or hold. Like my camera. I look at Lara again and decide that neither of us need to relive this memory, so I unwrap some jerky.

She bumps her head against my leg, and I shift around enough for her to get it into my lap. Even though this is really serious, I grin like an idiot at the way she's looking at me. She never lets herself get on drugs, probably because it makes her adorable. She hates taking even aspirin. At least we're together. But I'm going to need to get help. She can't travel, not like this. I don't want to leave her, but what else can I do? She might die without help. Not happening.

The sound of a rainforest at night is kind of creepy. There's wildlife sounds and insects, but no sound of humans. No traffic, or voices, or airplanes. Just the still air and the natural sounds of the world. It hadn't bothered me last night, but as the sun sets and leaves me and Lara alone with just a fire for comfort, it starts to get to me. I have to defend us. Me. Sam Nishimura fashionista and filmmaking genius against whatever dangers the forest will throw at us. We're boned.

And if another one of those stonemen appear, we're kind of extra boned!

"Sam?"

I look down at her. Oh yeah, I need to keep her awake. That's probably important, with her head injury and everything. God I'm stupid sometimes. "Yeah?"

She sounds as dazed as she looks, and her voice is a little wobbly. "Ever think about getting married?"

I'm not remotely expecting that question or anything even close to the subject at all. Ever. Never ever. Marriage has been about as far away from my radar as Russian Ballet. I stare at her, incredulous. What is she getting at? Was this a proposal? I brush back her hair. "Sweetie, you're high."

She laughs, and turns her head to bury it against my thigh. I don't think she's dropped the subject, and if it keeps her awake, I guess I can put up with it. "I've always figured I'd be eighty with a cat and still partying it up with you geriatric style. Maybe with a dog. Oh we should get a chinchilla! It's just a really complicated thing for me, with my family and everything. And what guy could I ever find that didn't just want the money and the sex? Who could love me for me?" There's faux drama in my voice at the last part, but Lara sees right through it. I'm doing a little soul baring here. Her hair is soft under my fingers, and I know the answer to my questions before I even finish saying it. "But then I got you. You love me for me. That's all I ever needed. It's all I'll ever need."

Lara makes this non-committal grunt and I narrow my eyes, wondering if she's been fishing for information. I dismiss the idea as ridiculous. When it came to relationships Lara is about as subtle as a cow. She smiles at me. "Wasn't one of the things I thought about growing up too. And then I met you and I realized that I wouldn't need anyone else either."

"Oh sweetie…" I lean down to kiss her. I can take advantage of her state and get her to answer just about anything but I'm not going to. So it's best to shut her up and change the subject, because if she really is serious, I'm not ready to answer that question yet. Not like this.