Here you go. I had some free time and was bored so that is why this is up so soon after the last one. Hope you like it. Enjoy.
I glanced at my forearm while running and didn't know whether I should smile or frown at the sight of his phone number written there. I saw that it was done with a bright pink ink. Which made me snicker. Of course it is. I thought.
I looked in front of me and stopped running at the sight of my siblings only a few feet away. Izzy was pacing with a hand on her thigh-where I knew she was hiding her dagger-while Jace talked to Clary a little way away leaning against the wall of the building. I glanced back at Izzy, not wanting to spoil my good mood with anger and jealousy that I knew were starting to rise within me.
"There you are." Said Izzy when she saw me. "We were starting to worry something had happened to you."
"We?" Jace asked looking up from where he was talking to Clary. "I told you that he's fine. You were the one freaking out over there." That earned him a punch in the shoulder from Izzy.
"Hey! What was that for?" He asked rubbing his shoulder.
"You said we're leaving." I said trying to distract them and avoid a fight.
"Yes, we are. The taxi will be here any minute." Izzy said still glaring at Jace.
"Well, we have to go." Clary took Simon's hand and turned to Jace to say goodbye.
Simon, who had started to smile when she took his hand was now frowning while she and Jace talked, standing a little too close to each other. I wasn't much different in that prospect.
"Alec." I turned around and saw Izzy looking at me a little concerned. "Where were you?"
"Nowhere." I said a little too quickly and then sighed. "I was outside. It was stuffy and I needed some fresh air." Well, at least it's not a lie. I thought, hoping that she will leave it at that.
She was still looking at me funny but didn't say anything else. I looked back over my shoulder and saw that Jace was still talking to Clary. My frown moved back into place.
"I'm sorry." Izzy said suddenly.
"What?" I looked at her questioningly.
"I didn't think that Jace would bring Clary. And I know that it hurts you." Her eyes were sad as she looked at me and then at Jace. "I am sorry I made you come and watch that."
"Don't worry about it." I said with a small half-smile that I knew didn't reach my eyes. "It's not like I can avoid them anyway. Where one is, the other is bound to follow..." She didn't look convinced. I put my hands on her shoulders. "It wasn't that bad. I had fun." With a warlock. I added mentally and then almost winced when the full meaning of it finally hit me.
I kissed a warlock. A Downworlder. Another male. I kissed him and I liked it. If someone finds out, I won't be a Shadowhunter anymore. I will be nothing. But my lips still tingled from the kiss. I could still taste him on the tip of my tongue. My skin still burned where his hands had held me only a few minutes ago. It was wrong. I knew that. One of the worst crimes I could commit. But why did it feel so right then?!
"Alec… What is that on your arm?!" Izzy said pulling me out of my thoughts.
"Wha- Nothing!" I said quickly and rolled my sleeve down.
Why didn't I do that sooner?! I mentally kicked myself for being so careless.
She looked at me with raised eyebrows but luckily the taxi finally appeared so I was saved from more questions.
For now. I reminded myself because knowing Izzy, she will make me tell her sooner or later.
Once all three of us were in the vehicle- Clary and Simon left, thank The Angel -I looked out of the window ignoring Izzy's curious look.
As I looked at the buildings outside I couldn't stop but think about Magnus.
Should I call him? I asked myself. The answer was there immediately. No I shouldn't. I should just forget about him. This was all just a big mistake. I shouldn't have talked to him. Shouldn't have let him touch me. Shouldn't have liked it. And I definitely shouldn't have kissed him back. And the list just goes on and on. I sighed. This night has a lot of shouldn't haves. There is no need for another one.
The more I thought about it, the more I was aware of the number. It was like I could feel it burning on my skin. Not a pleasant burn that Magnus's touch left but a bad one. The kind of burn that reminded me that if someone sees it I am as good as dead. The kind that reminded me how bad this whole situation is.
"Hey! Alec! Stop daydreaming and get out!" Jace said shoving me out of the door. "What is with you man?! " He turned to me once we were outside.
"Nothing." I said and turned around without even looking at him.
I went into the Institute and then straight into my room, trying to avoid both of them. Once there, I collapsed onto my bed more exhausted than I thought I was. But sleep didn't come and I ended up rolling up my sleeve to look at the pink phone number.
I can't. I thought again. And again. And again. And it became a chant. At some point I started whispering it under my breath. Trying to convince myself with the truth of that one little word. Because I really can't. There are so many reasons that explain why I can't. But suddenly that wasn't enough. All the reasons not to didn't seem good enough because they were someone else's reasons forced onto me. Making me obey the rules. Making me think this is all wrong. But it didn't feel wrong to me. Not in my heart. Not where it mattered. I wanted to call him. I wanted to kiss him again.
But you can't. A small voice said in my head. This is bad. this is not normal. Not natural.
"Great." I whispered miserably turning my face into the pillow. "I am talking to myself now."
In one quick movement and without thinking about it I got up, took my phone and punched in the numbers. My finger was hovering over the call button, just one press away. And I stopped myself.
"I can't." One last whisper and I threw the phone onto the bed.
I took off my sweater and marched into the bathroom. I am going to wash it off! I thought as I turned on the water and stripped. Once I was under the hot spray of water I took the soap and-trying not to think about it-rubbed it over the number. My eyes were closed as if I was waiting for some kind of pain to start. In reality I was just afraid that if I saw what I was doing I would stop. And that is not good because calling him and seeing him again isn't good no matter how much I want it. And the fact that I want to call is even worse than the fact that I have his number.
Had his number. I corrected myself with a sigh still rubbing the soap over my arm. I cursed myself for being such a coward as I opened my eyes.
My skin was starting to sting and it was a little red now but that is not what made my breath hitch and my eyes widen in disbelief. The number was still there. Still as pink and as fresh looking as it did when he first wrote it. It was not even smudged.
How is that possible?! I thought in disbelieve. What did he do?! I started rubbing the soap over it again, a little harder now. But still nothing. Why isn't it coming off?! I was getting angry now. Forgetting about everything that I had thought a minute ago. Now I just wanted it off. After a few more minutes of scrubbing-in vain-I finally gave up, now entirely convinced that it is no use. I finished the shower, put on my pajama pants and went back to bed. My hand was still red and stinging and my thoughts buzzing so I couldn't sleep yet. It was silent as I laid on my back and stared at the ceiling, only accompanied by my thoughts of right and wrong. It was maddening.
This all made me think about Izzy's last boyfriend. He was a Downworlder. Most of her boyfriends are. Because she doesn't care. She doesn't care about the rules. She does what she wants when she wants it.
Why can't I be like that?! I thought miserably but I already knew the answer. It was because I cared. I cared about the rules. I cared about what people thought. I cared too much. I always did.
I turned onto my side and remembered how three months ago, our parents found out about her and him. About her and a Downworlder. An enemy. I remembered the shouting. The fights. The silent treatment. The ignoring. The pretending. They almost turned her over to The Clave. Their own daughter. But their pride was a good thing this time. They didn't want anyone to know. They were too ashamed. It took a lot of time, begging and Izzy breaking up with him to get them to start talking to her again. To acknowledge her existence. And it was just a few days ago that they did. It wasn't hard for Izzy to break up with him. She didn't love him. She didn't love any of them. They were just flings. Just for fun. She always says. I think part of her does it for attention because our parents are never around. But to them, she is as bad as a criminal now. Our father was the worst. It was scary to watch him shouting and boiling in anger. I wonder what he would think of me kissing a Downworlder of the same gender. It can't be good. He would disown me immediately if he knew. He would turn me over to The Clave without a moment's thought.
And that is why he will never know. About me being gay. About the kiss. I will make sure he never knows. Was my last thought as sleep took me. And with it dreams about golden green eyes.
"Alec!" I heard someone calling me. "Alec!" Someone was shaking my shoulder.
I opened my eyes and looked up at the familiar figure in front of me. It was Max.
"What is it?" I asked still a little sleepy but quickly waking up.
"Jace said to wake you up." He sat down on the edge of my bed. "Training starts in a few minutes."
I pulled the covers off and got up. "Thank you Max. I will be out in a minute." I said stretching and shooing him out.
"What is that on your arm? " He asked me, adjusting his glasses by the door.
I looked at my arm and was once again hit by the events of yesterday. So that really happened. As I looked up again I saw that he was still waiting for an answer. "Nothing. Now go out so I can change." I pushed him out with one hand while hiding the other behind my back. I closed the door and I tried to steady my breathing.
How can I go and train with someone's phone number clearly written on my arm?!
I quickly got dressed and put on one of my sweaters hoping that the sleeves will stay put and not show anything. I raked my fingers through my hair and got out heading for the training room.
I collapsed in bed, my sore muscles complaining. Today was brutal. Jace was in the zone today. I mean he almost always is but Clary was there to observe-as Jace put it-but we all knew she was really there to watch him thus resulting in him working his hardest and almost killing me a few times. The only good thing was that he was too absorbed by her to notice when my sleeve accidentally rolled up and revealed what was underneath. I never thought I would see the day I would be thankful for her constantly being near Jace. Well, there is a first time for everything. Another reason it was so bad is because I was also distracted. Absorbed in my own thoughts of Magnus and the fear of them finding out. It was all too much. I knew that the first thing I needed to do was get his number off of my arm. Which ironically, only he can tell me how to do. Which means I have to call him. I didn't know how to feel about that. I was debating about it almost all night yesterday . About the wrongness of it all and now that I know I have no other choice… I don't know what to think about it.
So without giving myself a chance to think about it, I took out my phone and punched in the number-that I now knew by heart. I pressed the call button and brought the phone to my ear. My heart beating rapidly.
"Talk fast I'm busy." An annoyed voice boomed through the phone.
"It's A-Alec." I stuttered feeling the heat in my cheeks and cursing myself inwardly for stuttering.
"Blue-eyes." He breathed through the phone. "Hello."
"What did you do to that pen?! Your number won't come off my arm." I said accusingly going straight to the point. That is the only reason why I am calling. I remained myself. This is not a personal call.
Then why is your heart trying to break through your chest? A little voice in my head asked.
"Oh, just a little spell. " He answered nonchalantly.
"Magnus…"
"I love it when you say my name." He purred, making my face fill with even more heat. When I stayed silent he continued in a normal tone. "It was just to encourage you. It looked like you needed it. And if you look now you will see that it is gone."
I immediately looked down at my arm. The number was really gone. Like it was never there.
"Why did you do it in the first place?" I asked, accusation still in my voice.
"You are a good kisser. I just wanted a chance to make you… better. " He purred into the phone in a way that made me blush again.
"Are you blushing?" He asked me with a clear smile in his voice. "I really hope you are. You look good in red."
My blush worsened. "Stop doing that."
"Doing what?" He asked me confused.
"Talking like…that."
He laughed before answering. "Sorry, darling. Not going to happen. I am having too much fun."
Darling?
There were a few seconds of not so awkward silence before he purred again. "So…"
"So, what?" I asked confused.
"When am I going to see you again?"
"Amm… Magnus…I don't…"
He cut me off before I could continue. "You called me so you can't back out now."
"You practically made me call you." I reminded him. But thinking about seeing him again put a smile on my face.
"Details." He said nonchalantly. "So, tomorrow night? My place?"
"Amm…" Alone… In his apartment… Alone…
"Great!" He beamed without waiting for my answer. "See you at eight Blue-eyes!" He said before hanging up.
I stayed like that, lying on my bed with my phone in my hand, for at least ten minutes not knowing if I am more happy or terrified when it hit me:
I don't know where he lives. I starting to debate on whether or not to call back and ask when I noticed something on my right arm.
In the same pink ink as the phone number-and in the same place- was now an address. It was written in a beautiful calligraphy that looked more like it belonged on a wedding invitation than on my hand. The thought made me blush again.
So, what do you think? Good?
Ok,so I have no idea what to do about their date! Any suggestions?! Any little helps. I just need some inspiration.