Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Arthur Weasley had expected to get home from work, say hello to his family and his son's friends, pick up the Daily Prophet and have a nice cup of tea. What he didn't expect was having Luna Lovegood running out of his fireplace in a panic, with Mr. Lovegood close on his daughter's heels. No, that wasn't what he had expected. But when he heard Luna's story of a muggle boy that she had found and was in their house and had seen her—or not seen her—well, he figured he'd better go take a look.

When he stepped out of the fireplace and into the Lovegood's living room, it seemed their worst fears had been realized, but, as Arthur was always willing to make a good impression (as well as wanting to speak with a muggle), he put on his best smile, stuck out his hand, and told the sparkly powder-covered young boy in as nice a way as he could manage that he had accidentally stumbled upon a house of witchcraft and wizardry. The boy collapsed in a heap, with powder fluffing up around him in a way that would have been pretty if it hadn't been in such a situation.

"Oh, dear," said Arthur. "This is going to take a bit more explaining." Which was a shame, because obviously the boy would need a little more time before he would be able to answer Arthur's questions about why muggles needed an 'eye pod' to hear music.

Ed's brain had shut down. It was refusing to take in any more information. Ed just sat and stared at the red-headed old man and watched as he waved his little stick around and made the rooster clock zoom across the room, the fire change from blue to orange, and turned his own cloak into a dress and back again. He could tell the old man was getting more and more antsy as he just sat there and stared, not giving any reaction at all. The old man stopped his explanation, and looked at Ed for a moment.

"So, er, that's about it. Do you have any questions?"

Ed was silent. Questions? Of course he had questions! Was everyone in this room a crackpot? He had known Luna was a little strange, and her father wasn't much better—maybe even worse--, but this man looked like a respectable fellow, and even he was speaking as though Ed should take everything he saw as the truth. Ed had long learned not to believe everything he saw. So, he did what all normal people do when they see something they know to be impossible. He hit himself on the head.

"Ow."

The old man smiled. "You're not dreaming. There really are witches and wizards, and I'm afraid you've stumbled onto a family of them. Not that it's a bad thing, really. We'll just have to report it to the Ministry that you've come here, and they'll set things right."

Luna chose this time to make herself heard. "No, no, NO! You can't send him to the Ministry! They'll send their Man-eating Swarl Monkeys to eat out his brains and send him away! You can't do that!" Ed paled under his layer of silver powder. There was a thought forming in his mind that if there were such things as wizards and witches then maybe the other things Luna had told him were fact as well, not just the confused ramblings of a deranged mind. After all, one of them had already been proved correct.

"Luna…" sighed the old man. "The Ministry does not employ Man-eating Swarl Monkeys. They don't even exist."

"Yes they do!" shouted Luna and Mr. Lovegood at the same time.

"I really don't think there's any proof. Anyway, let's save more talk of Man-eating Swarl Monkeys for a later date. Really now, you're just making the poor boy more nervous." The old man shook his head and turned back to Ed. "Well, Mr…um…"

"Elric. But Ed's fine."

"Well, Mr. Ed—."

"Just Ed. No 'Mr.'"

"Ah. Ed. A rather short name, don't you think?"

"Don't call me short."

"I don't believe I—,"

"Just don't."

"Oh."

"What's your name?"

"Arthur Weasley."

"Kind of like weasel."

"No."

"Oh."

"Now, where did you say you were from?"

"I didn't."

"Then could you tell me please?"

"…"

Mr. Weasley frowned. "I'm afraid I need to know where you're from in order to send you home, Mr. Elric. I can have you Apparated there rather quickly. Now where did you say you were from?"

Ed turned away. "I can't go home," he whispered quietly, more to himself than the red-headed old man.

Mr. Weasley's face remained unchanged. "I'm afraid that unless you come from a different planet, I have to send you home. It is my duty and obligation."

Ed snorted. A different planet. Ha. How about an alternate universe.

Mr. Weasley obviously didn't like being snorted at. "Young man, I am a member of the Ministry of Magic and, as I was the one that was first informed of your present knowledge of witches and wizards, I am the one that has to take you home, otherwise I'll have to turn you over to the proper authorities, Man-eating Swarl Monkeys and all!"

Ed glared at him, and even though he was still covered in silvery dust and sitting on the floor, the glare was enough to make the old man back down.

Mr. Weasley turned to Mr. Lovegood. "I'm afraid you'll have to keep him here until he feels like telling me where he's from. I'll look in some of my children's school books and see if I can find a tongue-loosing potion. Hermione's at my house right now; I'm sure she'll be able to find something." Mr. Lovegood nodded, casting a slightly panicked look in Ed's direction. Ed stared sullenly back. He didn't like the sound of that potion.

"Well, I think that's all you need me here for. But I think it would be best if you tried to keep him from learning much more about the wizarding world. It could be disastrous." Mr. Weasley turned to Luna. "And please, Luna, try not to…"

Ed looked up with a humorless smile. Really, there was no point. Luna'd just do what she wanted to anyway. Like now, for example. She was standing on her head. Mr. Weasley evidently realized there was nothing he could do to keep her from spilling whatever beans she wanted to, because he sighed. "I'll come back when I figure something out. Until then, then." He grabbed some powder from a nose-shaped pot on the mantel, threw it into the fire, yelled, and disappeared into bright green flames.

Ed didn't really like that.

"Good-bye, Mr. Weasley!" called Luna just a little too late. She hopped onto her feet and jumped in front of Ed. She leaned down, and in a very serious voice said, "Did you know that you're covered in white sparkly dust?"

Ed stood up, glared at her, and stomped up the stairs to his room. Luna's big eyes followed him.

"Well," she said to herself, "I suppose I should go make some dinner." As her apron was knotting itself around her waist, there came a yelp-bump-slam! from upstairs. She glanced upwards as footsteps banged on the floor and she turned towards the staircase just in time to see Ed land at the bottom in a cloud of silver powder. He sat there panting for a moment, then looked up at her and said with as much force as he could muster,

"Do something about that blanket!!"

Everything Ed had ever known was falling down around his ears. In this universe, the Law of Equivalent Exchange meant nothing. A rat could be made from a teacup, inanimate objects could talk, and even creatures that reminded him of chimeras were considered normal. It was too much for him to take in. Too much. Either the Gate was punishing him for wanting Al back, or it was rewarding him by giving him a place where anything was possible. However, he wasn't quite willing to accept that he was being rewarded when every time he walked into his room his blanket snapped at him from the closet. That was as far as Luna had been willing to take it, saying that her father would be devastated if the blanket left the room.

At the moment Ed was sitting on a stool in the kitchen watching Luna as she hummed tunelessly to herself while directing the leftovers from dinner to their proper places in the 'cooling cupboard,' which had a spell placed on it to keep meats and things cold.

"So…" said Ed.

Luna turned to look at him, accidentally motioning a particularly fatty piece of meat onto his head. Grease dripped down Ed's forehead as Luna lowered her wand.

"Do muggles normally put meat on their heads?"

"You idiot! You're the one that put that there! You with your stupid magic!"

"Did I?"

"Yes!"

"Oh." She sat there for a moment as Ed seethed. She raised her wand, and off came the offending piece of steak, only to take a place on her own head. Luna giggled as the grease slimed across her temples. "Look, now we're the same!"

Ed found it difficult to be angry at someone that had a piece of meat balanced on their head. "Luna, get the meat off your head. Someone might eat that later."

"But no one ever eats leftovers in our house."

"Then why do you save them?"

Luna looked at him from under the greasy slab of meat. "I don't really know."

Ed shook his head and looked down at his hands. He had cleaned up before dinner, but there were still bits of sparkly dust stuck in his automail and underneath his fingernails.

"Scourgify."

Ed jumped as Luna's wand touched his hand and the bits of dust disappeared. She laughed at his expression.

"You're going to have to get used to magic. If you won't go home, I'll keep you here, and then you'll have to live with magic for the rest of your life." She paused for a moment. "However long that may be," she added as an afterthought.

"Are you going to kill me?"

Luna gasped. "No, no, no, no, no, no! That would be horrible! Wizards don't just kill people for the fun of it! That's like something You-Know-Who would do!"

"Who is it that I'm supposed to know?"

The girl put her finger to her lips and leaned in closer. "We don't say his name," she whispered. "He was a very dark wizard that liked to kill and torture for the fun of it. Surely you heard of all the murders recently. Even muggles like you should have known there was something wrong." She shuddered. "But thankfully," Luna said, suddenly cheerful again, "Harry killed him, and that's that." She grabbed Ed's hand and pulled him off his chair to his feet. "I'm going to show you something. Come with me."

Ed followed Luna outside her house. The sun had set and there was a beautiful crescent moon surrounded by hundreds of twinkling stars. He felt a tug on his sleeve and looked down into Luna's big eyes. It was the most serious he had ever seen her, even when she was talking about You-Know-Who. Ed gulped, afraid of what might happen.

Luna leaned closer until their noses were almost touching. She took a deep breath and blew. She smelled like honey. Ed gulped again. He wasn't quite sure what was happening. Luna took another breath and closed her eyes. Ed started to panic. She wasn't going to—

"Are you my friend?"

Ed pulled back abruptly. Luna still stood with here eyes closed. "What?" he asked.

Luna opened her eyes. "Are you my friend?" she repeated.

"Are you serious?"

"I think you must be confused. He's dead."

"What?"

Luna giggled. "Did you like the joke? You meant the serious as in serious serious, and I made a pun on 'Sirius'." She giggled again.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Seriously," said Luna as she shook her head. "But getting back to your original question... Being friends is the most serious topic in the world. Other than being family, of course."

"Then…then what was all that back there?" Ed gestured wildly, slightly embarrassed about what he had thought was going to happen.

Luna looked over her shoulder. "Back where?"

"You know, the whole blowing thing! What was that?" Ed replied.

Luna turned around to look at Ed again. "I was getting serious. It's hard to get serious when you've just had a piece of dinner on your head."

Ed could hardly believe the conversation he was having. "How on earth does blowing on me make you get serious?! I thought you were going to--!" Ed stopped. He couldn't finish the sentence.

Luna appeared to be confused. "What did you think I was going to do?"

"Nothing."

"Tell me."

"No."

"Your cheeks are pink."

"They are not."

"Are too."

"Are not. Besides, it's dark out. You can't even tell."

"I can tell."

"Can not."

"Lumos."

"What the heck—!"

"Your cheeks are pink!"

"Shut up." Ed turned away, embarrassed.

"You didn't answer my question. Are you my friend?"

Ed looked down at the strange, small, white haired, big eyed girl holding a glowing stick. The pale light cast by the wand cast eerie shadows across the lawn. "Yeah, sure. Whatever."

Luna smiled. "Then come with me. I have something to show you."

She turned and scampered skillfully down the grass toward a marshy-looking area, leaving Ed on the top of the hill.

Ed watched her for a moment. "Ah, what the heck," he muttered, and followed.

Well, there it is. Chapter three. I liked the end of this chapter better than the beginning. Heehee...how many of you thought she was going to kiss him?

Haha.

Thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far. I love it. iMuchas, muchas gracias! It makes me feel so much more like writing!

Now for my questions. Is it moving too fast? Too slow? Do you understand who's talking at all times? Are some attempts at humor so completely obvious they make you want to pull out your eyes and send me a review? I realize the serious/Sirius line has been used way too many times. Sorry. It just fit so perfectly. I actually didn't realize it until I read over the second time and I just had to add it.

Mr. Weasley and Ed got off to a great start, don't you think?

A few more things. I've decided on a basic storyline, and I know whether or not Ed's going to have alchemy/wizard powers. Thanks to all those who gave their opinions of the subject! And another thing--I live off of spellcheck. I know which words I want to use, and most of the time I don't know how to spell them. I generally end up using the wrong form or the wrong number or "r"s or something like that. If you notice something, please tell me. Thank you to those of you who have mentioned these things already. I spelling/grammar errors when I'm reading fanfiction, so I want to make it better for you guys as well.

Thanks again for the reviews!

Hugs, kisses, and many anime boys in your room when you wake up in the morning--

churu

-edit- My parent's computer has this really annoying filter on it that takes out words and stuff that if deems "inappropriate." 'Witch' and 'red-headed' were some of them. It took them out of my stinking story!!

Grrrrr...so now I'm on my sister's. I hope this works this time. Sorry, sorry, sorry!!