A/N: Oh, I feel awful. I haven't updated in more than a month! =O BUT, I also have an important announcement for you Do, Re, Mi fans: My other story, Epic Fail, is beating you guys out! Le gasp! =O See, in my head, there is a bitter rivalry between the Epic Fail fans and the Do, Re, Mi fans, and they are constantly trying to out-do each other. I know that's not really true, but this might motivate you: Updates come faster to my "Pride and Joy" story, and so far the top three competing for that title are: Epic Fail. Then, Do, Re, Mi. Then LOVE-EVOL. The way to bump your favorite story up to P&J is by Reading them and then Reviewing. The one with the most Reviews and Views by the end of December earns the title of my Pride and Joy. So, there you have it. =)
Someone requested E is for Ecstasy I decided to use it. I wrote like, half of it before deciding that it sucked monkey tails. SO, I had to use something else. I should be at, like, M is for Mistletoe, but because I haven't updated in forever, we have E is for…well, you'll see. =)
Ecstasy: The feeling of great joy. Related: Ecstatic. Thank you, Mr. Webster! XD
I don't own PJO, or anything else I don't own. =P
E is for Evergreen- Part I
"C'mon, c'mon, c'mon!" Travis was practically bouncing up and down with excitement. "Come on!"
"I'm getting there." Katie Gardener-Stoll snapped, closing the door to their medium-sized, shared apartment. She shoved the key into the door and locked it, then turned to her soon-to-be husband. "Do we have to go it today? The roads are kind of icy. We can go get it first thing tomorrow…" She worriedly placed a gloved hand on her stomach.
"Yes! All of the good ones will be gone by tomorrow! I'll drive carefully, I promise!" Travis practically ran to the car, avoiding all of the particularly icy spots. Katie just stood there, staring at him.
With a sigh, Travis walked back to her, grabbed her hand, and dragged her over to the Mazda 3. "Let's go, h-" Katie glared at him.
"Sorry. Habit." He apologized sheepishly.
Katie just rolled her eyes and got in the passenger seat. Travis ran around to the driver's seat, but just as he reached for the door handle, he lost his footing on a patch of ice and fell to the hard concrete.
"Travis!" Katie exclaimed, looking out of the window to try and catch a glimpse of him.
"I'm good, I'm good!" He popped up, looking fine, if you don't count the large red scratch down his face, near his ear.
"Then let's go! If I miss Nine Lives Of Chloe King tonight, I will tie you to the damn tree then throw you out a window." "Oh, but my dearest, picking out a Christmas tree each year is, like, tradition. I'm sure even you did that when you were little, even out in hick-country."
Katie glared daggers at him "What did I tell you?"
"Not to call Tennessee "hick-country"."
"Exactly."
"Sorry."
"No, you're not."
"Yeah, I'm not."
Travis peeled out of the drive before his fiancée could smack him.
~*~*~*~*~*P-A-G-E-T-O-T-H-E-B-R-E-A-K-~*~*~*~*~*~
"How 'bout this one?"
A pudgy, balding clerk pointed to a tiny, next to needle-less tree worthy of a Charlie Brown Christmas reenactment.
"Uhhh….." Travis started, exchanging a glance with Katie. "I don't think that's the one, ya know?"
Katie nodded in agreement.
"Alrighty then, folks. Moving on." He led them to a new row of trees. "Now, these here are yadda yadda yadda yuk yuk yak" Well, that's all Travis heard. Because his eyes had drifted over to the side, and he was staring at the most awesome thing he'd ever seen. Well, had seen this week.
This was the most awesome tree ever.
Like, the mother of all trees.
"That one. Right there. We'll take it." He pointed to the epic tree, interrupting the man mid-sentence.
"Travis!" Katie hissed. "That tree has got to be 15 feet tall!"
"We can just trim a little off the top." He shrugged.
"Um, uh, sir? That tree has been part of Dale's Tree Farm's landscape for over 50 years. It's still growing. It's not for sale." The man said.
"Oh, shut it lardass." Travis said nonchalantly. "Just take my money and give me the damn tree."
"Travis!"
"What?"
"Apologize to the man; we don't need that tree anyway! You know that I'm already against cutting down innocent trees, but since these are already cut, we have to save them!"
"Katie, this tree is meant for us!"
"My foot is meant to kick your a-"
"Language, my dear!" Travis chided.
Katie glared at him. " I don't even want a tree to begin with, but if we must-"
"We must!"
More glares from Katie. "Then we will get a pre-cut one, because it has no chance of survival. So let's apologize to this poor man, pick out an already-cut tree, one that isn't taller than a skyscraper, pay, and get the heck out of here." She grabbed his hand and drug him over to the portly, balding salesman.
They stood in an awkward silence for a minute, before Katie elbowed Travis hard I the ribs. "Apologize." She hissed.
"Lawee." Travis mumbled incoherently.
"What was that, Travis?" Katie asked sweetly. "Speak up."
"Sorry." He grumbled again. Satisfied (or rather, knowing that was as good as she was going to get), Katie smiled at the man and politely asked to see another tree.
However, the man looked strangely…misty-eyed. "Of course." He sniffed. He selected another tree. "Now, this here is a tree!" He slammed it down on the asphalt, and the already needle-lacking tree went next-to-completely bare as pine needles showered everywhere.
With a sob, the man tossed the carcass to the side and let out a loud sob. "I can't do anything right!" He howled, throwing his arms around the couple. Travis immediately stiffened.
"I am not comfortable with this." He said to Katie, who's face was currently twisted into a mask of disgust.
"Ditto." She replied. The man just continued to blubber.
Travis started to move his shoulders up and down in an attempt to shrug the man off of him. "Dude. Dude. Dude!" He exclaimed, at last freeing himself from the man's grasp. He grabbed onto his fiancée's shoulder and began to extract her from the weird tree salesman. "Not cool!"
Katie finally stumbled back out of the danger-zone and into her betrothed's arms. "Seriously!" She agreed.
"No!" The man hiccupped, and blindly reached out with his arms for the youngsters.
"Dude! What's your problem?" Travis exclaimed, his arms circled protectively around Katie.
"Don't leeeeeaaave meeeee!" The man moaned.
Travis and Katie exchanged glances, then turned around to leave.
"Please!" The man lunged out and caught Travis around the waist.
Travis let out a scream and frantically tried to pry the man off.
Now, normally, our dearest Katie would find Travis's frantically shrieking and swatting hilarious, but because this was caused by a balding, portly, middle-aged man who currently was crying onto the back of Travis's jeans while his arms encircled his waist, she actually found it quite fitting.
"Help!" she shrieked, taking her brand-new, very expensive green Kate Spade purse and raised it threateningly above her head. She brought it down and it smacked the man right on his hairless head. He immediately let go of Travis and curled up into the fetal position on the ground.
Travis bounded over to Katie's side and shivered. "Violated." He whispered. "I feel so violated."
"We're leaving!" Katie announced, grabbing Travis's hand and whirling around.
"No! Please don't leave! You're….you're all I have!" The man bawled.
"I don't even know your name!" Travis exclaimed, clinging to Katie.
"Please." The man breathed, getting up and scrambling over to the couple. He was much to close for either's taste. "Nobody ever comes to me for help. You guys….you guys walked right through the gate and came right up to me. Me!"
That was the exact moment when both Travis and Katie instantly regretting asking this strange man.
"You were the only one there!" Katie exclaimed, edging away.
"And you chose me!" He exclaimed, his eyes shining.
"Um, erm, yeah. Because you were the only one there."
"You hold a special place in my heart!"
"Yeah. We're leaving now."
"YOU CAN'T!"
"Hey, Katie, I'm pretty sure I saw a Mike's Tree farm down the road a bit."
"That sounds perfect."
"TAKE ME WITH YOU!"
"No!" Katie said forcefully, smacking him again with her purse.
"YES!" The man exclaimed.
"Leave us alone!" Travis growled. He snatched Katie's hand and took off like a shot towards the Mazda 3 in the parking lot.
"Wait up!" The man pulled a set of car keys from his back pocket and made like to press an unlock button.
To bad for him, Travis, our quick little son of Hermes had already navigated the maze of trees and was approaching the car, pulling Katie along.
As they got in the car, another car about 3 spaces down lit up…..somewhat. IT was an old, rusty, poop-brown Oldsmobile with foggy lights, one of which was cracked, like someone had punched it. The paint was scratched, peeling, chipped, and rusty, despite its already God-awful color. The right back tire was flat, and two of the windows were cracked, another was shattered, and the windshield was covered in bird crap. It's front end was hanging unnaturally close to the ground, while the back bumper was duct-taped onto the car itself. On the bumper, barely peeking out under all the duct tape, was a bumper sticker. It read: Middle-age, Middle-wage!,but the Middle-wage was crossed out in black Sharpie. The side facing Katie and Travis was dent horribly bad, like it had been side-swiped a few times.
Travis peeled out of the lot, nearly running over a squirrel. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think I'm almost done tree shopping." He was ready to buy the next tree he laid eyes on, no matter how scraggly or small.
"Do we dare take on another tree farm?"
"Um, how 'bout Lowes instead?"
A/N: Ooooh, no, we are NOT done yet! I just have to go, because I'm on the mini-laptop and my brother needs it. I'll post part 2 later this evening, I hope. Feliz Navidad, Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukah (SP?), or whatever it is that you celebrate/say Merry Christmas! Eat good food, drink lots of eggnog, and unwrap magnificent presents, my friends! The rest of my incredibly long disclaimer and AN will be in part 2! Brave the cold, my little popsicles, if you have snow- I don't! I don't have a white Christmas, so if you have one, go and play for me, please? I Heart Y'all, see ya later!
Read on and Rock out,
NinjaNakkiOfCabin11