Wow this is technically the fiftieth chapter. I can't believe it became this long. Well anyway the next chapter. Here you go.
The days have been passing by incredibly slowly.
It has been three days now since I was forced to come to Idris but it seems like so much more.
The meetings are just getting on my nerves by this point at how stupid and stubborn everyone is. It doesn't seem like we're going to agree on something anytime soon. And on top of that Caroline has been following me around every chance she got. Calling me a liar still.
A few times I almost told her that I'm with Magnus. With a Warlock. But I didn't because I know that she will spread the word around and all our hard work of hiding our relationship from the Clave will be for nothing. So I just kept my mouth shut and tried ignoring her as much as I can.
Sometimes even Jace and Izzy helped in getting rid of her but my parents on the other hand were encouraging her. Especially my father. I have heard him a few times talking to her. Telling her to not give up. I guess he really doesn't want a son like this.
On the other hand he is still avoiding me though. Every time I enter a room he would leave without a word. Which is kind of good I guess. Seeing the disappointment and disgust in his eyes every time he looks at me for a second is killing me as it is.
I don't want him to look at me like that. I don't want anyone to look at me like that.
At least Maryse isn't like that. We don't talk that much and she avoids the subject but at least she's there. Smiling, talking. Pretending that everything is like it was before. To be honest that hurts too. Because it's not the same. Everything is so much different. I am different. But at least that's better than nothing so I let it be. Knowing that we will have to talk about it sometime but giving her time to approach me herself. When she's good and ready.
But still the thing keeping me on edge more than anything else is Sebastian. When I feel his eyes on me the hair on the back of my neck springs up and this strange chill comes over me. I have a feeling he's not as friendly and harmless and everyone sees him. He's bad news. I can feel it.
The good thing is that when I told Jace this he didn't laugh at me and called me crazy and too suspicious, like I have been feeling I am lately, but said he will keep an eye out just in case. I guess if everything else fails my parabatai will always be there for me. The thought made me feel a little better.
I haven't told Magnus any of this though. I don't want him to worry for nothing.
Magnus…
One of the rare good things about the past few days is that we have been sending each other fire messages every night and sometimes in mornings and afternoons too. Of course I had to attend the meetings so we couldn't talk all the time but those hours we could were the happiest I have been since I came here.
We mostly talked about nothing important. Just how was your day and did anything interesting happen and of course he would talk about yet another client that came in with unrealistic requests. But he always managed to make me smile. But then again he was always able to do that no matter how bad the day was. He always made it better.
There was the sound of cracking of flames and I took the paper as it appeared in front of me.
Are you hanging in there darling?
I smiled as I read it, feeling happy at the fact that he's worried about me.
I'm fine. The meeting just finished. Another one is tomorrow morning.
I sent. Putting the one he sent in my pocket before anyone sees, considering that I was still outside on my way back to the house.
"Hey Alec." I groaned as I heard her perky voice and just continued walking in hope that she will leave me alone already.
But no such luck.
She was half running to keep up with my fast pace but she still did.
"Did you not hear me?" She asked.
"I did but I was hoping I will be able to get away from you if I pretended not to." I answered honestly, looking straight ahead.
"Why are you always so mean to me?"
"Because you're stupid and get on my nerves just by being in the same room."
She stopped walking at that and I was just about to sigh in relief when she ran to me again.
By The Angel just give up already. I thought angrily.
"You don't mean that." She insisted.
"Oh but I do. I really do."
There was a cracking of flames and I stopped to get it.
Caroline stopped too and reached for the paper but I snatched it out of her hand the second she toughed it and quickly put in my pocket, intending to read it later when she's not next to me.
"Hey why did you do that? Maybe it was for me." She complained.
"It wasn't." I said simply, starting to walk again.
Almost there I thought as I saw the house. Just a little bit more and I can get rid of her.
"And how do you know that? You haven't even read it?" She ran to keep up with me again.
"Because it's from my boyfriend." I answered, this time without my usual hesitation at the words. "So it's for me."
"When will you finally stop with this little act?"
"It's not an act. Why is it so hard for you to accept that I have a boyfriend? Are you really that dumb?" I stopped and looked at her as I asked.
"Because it can't be true. You're better than that. You're not-"
"What? Not what? Sick?" I asked, getting angry again. "Think carefully what your next words will be. I hissed. "Because I hate you as it is. You don't need to give me more reason to or it won't end well."
She took a step back, looking scared as my eyes flashed furiously.
Good. I thought. You should be afraid.
And with that I turned around and continued towards the house, leaving her behind. And this time she stayed there too.
"Let me guess, you ran into Caroline again." Jace said as I stomped into the kitchen, feeling like punching something.
I glared at him. "You think?"
"Woa calm down." Izzy said, walking to me and pushing me down to the chair. Making me sit down on it. What I let her do after a minute and took a deep calming breath as I did.
"That's it. Now tell us what happened." Izzy ordered, sitting beside me.
"I swear if anyone else calls me sick Ill lose it." I said, looking down at my hands. Slowly calming down but feeling so trapped in this house.
"She called you sick?" Jace asked, now getting angry himself.
"Not really. She said I can't have a boyfriend because I'm better than that. That I'm not sick."
As I said it I felt sick at my words.
I'm not sick. There's nothing wrong with me. I thought but started doubting it again. Just a few days around these people made me doubt myself again. And after I finally accepted myself as I am. Just a few words are enough to break it all.
"Hey don't look like that." Jace said, looking at me sadly. "It's not true. There's nothing wrong with you. Please don't listen to them."
"Yeah, you managed to get so far. Don't let them take you down. Don't let them win." Izzy put her hand on my shoulder soothingly. "You're better than that."
I looked from one to the other. The love and trust I saw in their eyes making me calm down.
I'm going to be fine. I'll get through this. I thought. I'm not alone.
"I think I'm going to take a walk for a little bit." I said, getting up. "Just need to get away for a bit."
"Ok." Jace said and caught Izzy's arm as she went to get up after me, enabling her to.
She looked at him questioningly but he just kept his gaze on me. And I saw nothing but understanding in those eyes.
Understanding that I need some time alone. Something I haven't had for a while.
…
I was out for a while after that. Just thinking. Sorting things out.
Caroline. The Clave. Sebastian. It all seems too much. They are all cornering me at the fast time. And I don't even know what one of them wants from me.
Just as I thought it the shouting caught my attention and I stopped, now only a little bit away from the house. The voice seeming familiar. And at the next words I knew why.
"No! Stop saying that! It's not true!" I heard Max shout again.
What is happening? I thought while quietly getting closer so I can see. Who is he arguing with?
I managed to get close enough to see but still stay unnoticed and froze in place when I saw who it was. Max was turned so he was facing me but someone was standing in front of him with his back towards me. Someone who had his arm in a tight hold as Max tried to struggle away.
It took all in me to not run in immediately and make whoever it is back off. But I made myself stay where I was so I can see what is happening and who that is.
"It's true. He's an abomination and by that the best thing we can do is contain it." I heard Sebastian's voice and immediately had a bad feeling about all of this.
"That's not true!" Max tried to struggle again but to no avail. "Alec isn't sick or wrong. There is nothing wrong about him."
They are talking about me. I thought in shock. And Sebastian knows. I don't know how but he knows. The thought made me turn white.
"I told you already haven't I. He's-"
"He's not wrong because he has a boyfriend. I know him. And they are both going to hurt you if you keep talking like this. You're the one who's wrong." Max said, looking scared but still not backing down.
I felt happy that he is defending me like this. It means that he really doesn't mind. But at the same time seeing Sebastian's back turn hard and he's hold on Max tighten even more I found myself thinking that it would have been better if he hasn't said anything.
"You little-" What followed happened so fast that I barely had time to react. Sebastian cut himself off and picked up a big rock with his free hand before hitting Max on the head with it, all in inhuman speed.
But I managed to run out of my hiding spot-the second he reached for the rock-and push Max out of the way. Getting the hit that was intended for Max hard to my shoulder.
I heard a cracking sound that can't be good and a searing pain ran through it, making me cry out in pain.
Max-who fell to the floor as I pushed him-looked at me with wide eyes.
"Max, go get help! Go get Jace!" I yelled at him, my eyes on Sebastian whose eyes looked deadly as his gaze fell on me.
I heard as he quickly stumbled onto his feet and ran towards the house.
"Now that wasn't nice." Sebastian said with a smile that made a shiver run down my spine. And not a good kind. "But since you're already here…"
He advanced towards me, making me step back but he was so much faster than me and caught my already hurt arm, yanking me to him and making cry out in pain again only to bite down on my tongue when he hit me on the stomach with his knee. Hit me hard and make me double back.
"You're kind disgusts me." He spit at me hatefully making me flinch.
He grabbed my throat and made me look up at him as he tightened his hold. Making me unable to breath.
He laughed as I struggled and tried to get some air but to no avail, he just squeezed tighter.
Black spots were starting to dance in front of my eyes when he finally let go and I fell down on my knees, breathing in and out rapidly. Getting the all needed air in my lunges again. Every breath hurting like hell.
"Disgusting." I heard him say again but didn't even have time to look up when I felt something hard hit me on the head and everything went black.
I guess this is it. My end. Was my last thought before it did.
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Who hates me right now?! I would have apologized or something but I'm soooo not a good person. And I feel evil today so I'll leave it like this and let you suffer. 15 reviews please.
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