Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters...say it with me! I don't own any of these characters

A/N: Hope everyone enjoyed the last chapter. I thought that this would complicate the story and draw it out, but it seems to have had the opposite effect and shortened it a great many chapters-I think, don't quote me on that! So, I guess I have to decide if Bella should reveal her deep dark secret or not. I wish I was a planner and knew how everything was supposed to play out, but I'm not. I'm as in the dark as all of you. A special thanks to literaturecrazy for your thoughtful reviews and ideas! And, of course, all my other faithful reviewers and readers. You guys never fail to put a smile on my face!

Chapter Nine Decisions

The drive home was silent as I replayed the scene over and over in my head. Edward kept casting me worried looks, but kept his questions to himself. With each mile that we traveled closer to that big white house the more forceful the feeling of foreboding rose in me. How was I going to get out of this mess? I'd as good as lied to Edward by not stepping up immediately and revealing the truth of the night's events. Hell, I couldn't tell which was worse: the loss of control or the lie that Demetri and I had concocted. Once I entered that house I would have to either reveal that lie and deal with the Cullens' disappointment or continue to lie to everyone and I wasn't a good enough actress to keep that up indefinitely.

I got out of the car not at all certain of my next move when Edward placed a gentle hand on my arm. "Say something," he pleaded as he peered intently into my eyes. I believe that he actually thought that if he just concentrated hard enough that he'd be able to read my mind like everyone else's. Oh! I'd forgotten that little hang up. Though I could conceivably pull off a lie with no one the wiser, Demetri could not. It was a miracle that he hadn't already accidentally revealed the truth back in the alley. Edward must have indeed been focused on his own thoughts to miss such an exchange. Or had he in fact heard all of Demetri's thoughts and was allowing our little charade to play out? Was he giving me enough rope to hang myself, so to speak? I ground my teeth as I tried to analyze every scenario. I thought about just reading his thoughts, but he always felt my presence when I did that.

I leaned against the hood of the car carefully avoiding his eyes that were so full of concern and love. "Why didn't Alice see this happening?" Always good to have all the information when trying to create a plausible lie.

He ran his hand through his hair and sighed. "She was a little preoccupied with Jasper. He was hit the hardest at the club-what with everyone's need crashing into him." He sat on the hood beside me. "They came home as soon as they left the Dungeon. What I can't believe is that I didn't catch these thoughts in his mind. He seemed to be adapting to our diet exceedingly well. I guess I just got careless."

Typical Edward- always taking the blame for things that had nothing to do with him. How was I ever going to own up to my transgression? If he blamed himself for not seeing the signs with Demetri, how much worse would it be when he discovered that I was the one who attacked Tyler? "Where were you? I didn't see you when I came down from Alyria's dressing room?" As much as I hated to admit it, I did sort of blame him for not keeping me under control and Alice for not paying enough attention to prevent this mess. But, what really maddened me was my own lack of control. I guess I'd just gotten cocky with the experiments that Carlisle had put me through. I'd been around humans and they didn't seem any tastier to me than- say - mountain lions. On top of that, I'd just fed on two deer last night. Though, nothing could have prepared me for that overwhelming scent. Now I knew exactly how impressive it was that Edward had not killed me the first day we met.

"I went to the lower floor…where some less than savory things take place," he replied uncomfortably, his voice pulling me out of my thoughts back to the question I'd asked him.

"Dare I ask?"

He shook his head. "No, I do not think that you would enjoy that particular bit of information."

We both fell silent as I imagined all sorts of nefarious things taking place in the lower level of the Dungeon. How much worse could it be than what I'd seen upstairs with Demetri and Alyria? God! Demetri. How was I going to fix this mess? And do it without further hurting Edward? Caring for Demetri upet him so much, but I couldn't let them kick him out of the house for something I'd done.

I laid my hand over his. "I need to talk to Demetri before you guys get into a big discussion, okay?" I went back to avidly studying my shoes as I whispered those words into the night, not trusting my voice to remain steady.

Edward was quiet for a few moments. "You should prepare yourself…" he paused casting a sideways glance at me. "The family will most likely ask him to leave."

I chewed on my bottom lip as I turned his words over in my head. I closed my eyes and exhaled forcefully as I drew myself up. "Fine. You may as well know that I will not be voting to send him away. I just need to talk to him for a few minutes, privately. No reading his thoughts, okay? And then you guys can have your little trial," I added scornfully as I strode off to the house. Hopefully he would respect my demand and stay out of Demetri's thoughts.

He grabbed my arm and wrenched me around, anger covering his beautiful face. "How can you defend him, Bella? He murdered Tyler."

I didn't want to outright lie about anything, so I ignored his question and asked one of my own. "Jasper has had trouble sticking to the diet," I murmured so softly, afraid to bring that up. "You would not kick him out of the family because he slipped up, right?"

He released me as though I'd burned his palm and glowered at me. "That is hardly the same thing and you know it."

I threw my hands into the air in frustration. "How is it different? Jasper and Demetri are both part of this family. How can you sit there and say that Demetri deserves one punishment and Jasper another?"

His eyes narrowed as he really looked at me for the first time tonight. "You are taking Tyler's death very well," he finally stated pointedly.

I shrugged not sure what to say to that.

"Is Demetri your only concern? Can you not afford some regret for Tyler and his family?"

I bit my lip, but just remained quiet. I did feel horrible about Tyler more than he could ever imagine, but he was dead no amount of regret would change that, Demetri, on the other hand, was in a precarious position right now.

He shook his head. "Let's get this over with," he grumbled as he strode off to the house without so much as a glance back at me.

Demetri was on the recliner listening to Carlisle who was pacing back and forth in front of the couch where Esme, Rosalie, and Emmett were seated. Alice and Jasper were seated on the floor closest to Demetri. All eyes turned towards us as we entered. I joined Carlisle and whispered softly, "Can you give me a moment with Demetri?" He nodded and I motioned to Demetri to follow me out back.

I held his hand with my trembling one as I led him deeper into the night. "First, thank you for trying to protect me." He started to reply when I placed my finger softly against his lips. "I can't let you throw yourself on your sword for me. There's no way that Edward won't eventually see the truth in your thoughts- if he hasn't already. The more I think about it, the likelier it is that he already knows who did what and is keeping silent for some reason."

"Stop," he spoke softly. "It's possible that Edward does know, but don't you see? If he's aware and still willing for me to take the fall…you two will continue to have problems as long as I'm around. He may simply be using our lie to his benefit. Besides, I've already discussed this with Carlisle. I am leaving. At least for a little while."

"No! You don't have to do this. I want you here."

"Bella," he sighed. "You need to ask yourself why my staying or leaving is so important to you." He smoothed his hand down my hair and brushed a few strands out of my face.

"I don't understand," I answered weakly, but the sinking feeling in my stomach said differently.

Demetri smiled sardonically. "I think you do. Alyria's words tonight were not false. She did not misinterpret my feelings for you, nor yours for me."

I went motionless, not even breathing as his words rushed over me. "I don't love you, Demetri. Not like that."

"It was not love that she accused us of feeling for one another." He kissed the top of my head before continuing. "I want you to know that you have healed me, Bella. Your friendship has meant so very much to me, but it will be better all around if I leave. You do not need to confess to your Edward or feel guilty about your feelings for me."

"I can't continue to lie to him. Especially if he already knows." That makes continuing this lie all the more unappealing. I leaned my head against his hard chest. "Your leaving solves nothing." If I could cry I'd have already soaked through his shirt with the tears of disappointment that was sure to come once I told Edward and the rest of the family everything. "He's never going to trust me again. He'll probably make us move to some remote area where I can never harm another human again."

He tilted my face up to his. "I fear you are right. Edward will be obsessed with keeping a very close watch over you."

"You don't think I'm a monster?" I whispered.

"Bella, I've done so much worse and I've seen your heart. You could never be a monster in my eyes. You are my personal angel."

I looked over his shoulder at the moon shining brightly over the back yard. "He will always see me as a monster." There was no way he could forgive me for this. I'd felt his anger for Demetri for a death that I'd caused. That anger would not disappear once he learned the truth, despite what he might say to the contrary.

"You are still thinking in human terms, Bella. Always is not a word a vampire uses lightly, because it means something completely different from the mortal word. With time, all will be well with you two."

I didn't want to think too much about the sadness creeping into my heart at the thought of Demetri leaving. "Where will you go?" I asked as I pulled him into a hug, inhaling his sweet scent.

"I am going to meet up with Alyria. She was interested in our way of life. We might travel north to Denali, or just create our own coven," he replied as he held me tighter.

"So our bargain is fulfilled?"

He smiled. "For the time being." His lips brushed against my cheek and with that he disappeared into the night.

A/N: Feedback please? I just want people to understand that Bella is not weak-she just had the unfortunate luck to run into someone who affects her the way she affected Edward as a human. And she didn't have his experience and 100 years worth of control. Thanks MickyandMinnie for letting me know that though these things are obvious in my head that I don't always convey them adequately. That's why feedback and questions are so invaluable. Writers spend so much time with their story that sometimes they don't realize that certain scenes and ideas aren't as clear to the reader as it is to the writer. If that comes up again please let me know so I can make corrections.

Thanks!

Sabrina