Here it is; the finale! It's shorter than some of the other chapters, but it took the longest due to the fight scene, which I was doing my best to make not lame. I would have had this up sooner, but my friends and I are trying to make a webshow and we're having uploading nightmares… Sigh.
Today (or rather-looks at clock-yesterday) was my last day of school. Technically, I don't get out until Friday, but I'm exempt from my semester tests (score!) and don't have to go anymore. Woo-hoo, summer! And I am now officially a senior! Oh, and more good news: I made drum major for my band! Woo!!!
So anyway, this is the last chapter of "A Chef's Hands"! It's happy and sad. I'm glad I get to move on to new projects, but also sad to see it go. In a fit of nostalgia I reread most of it before writing this, just because. I really can't believe it's finished! It's crazy!
About the epilogue: there were only two people who said, "NO!!!" and six people said "YES!!!" and two more said, "SanRob!" So I am going to write the SaNa epilogue, but not immediately; it may be a ways down the road. That's why the status bar doesn't say "Complete" yet even though the summary does.
I may still be tempted to write the SanRob one, but we'll have to see.
For those of you uninterested in an epilogue, particularly a SaNa one, never fear; the story DOES end here, so there's nothing you're missing; it's just pointless after fluff.
As for future projects, I have a teaser for my next big One Piece fanfic at the end of this chapter! It's gonna be a Zoro/Sanji nakamaship fic of epic proportions! Fun! I hope to start in June, but there's some oneshots and drabbles I want to do, first.
Reader Review Corner!
I'm glad all of you were cheering Sanji on! Woo! Go, fight, win!
Mysterious Panther: YES! Burn up the competition with your fiery passion!!! (just weirded herself out a little)
ShaolinQueen: Thanks! And yes, Luffy's slow, but that's why we love him! Hope you enjoy this.
Dancing Nightmare: Woohoo! Everyone's so pumped up, it's contagious, even at two in the morning! And yeah, it's just plain rude. Usopp was fun. I enjoy writing him.
Daschel: Thank you! And yeah, my heart sank there, too, when I reread it earlier. Does that make me a hack? But Sanji is the best, no? Woo!
Blueraven: Thanks! And yeah, it's what made me first start liking Usopp (before that, I admit to thinking he was just annoying, though I thought it was cute with him and Kaya). After that I loved him just as much as the rest of the Straw Hats. Hope you enjoy this!
And now, with no more gilding the lily, the finale!
A Chef's Hands
By Dandy Wonderous
Chapter 6
The tense stand-off continued for several moments, neither man wanting to make the first move. Then Servace huffed loudly and pulled the meat cleaver off his belt.
"Choose your weapon," he barked, raising it for battle.
Sanji glared back at him through the cigarette smoke. "That isn't for fighting, you know."
"To serve me well in the kitchen, it must also serve me well on the battlefield." He studied the edge, running one calloused finger along it gently.
The younger cook made a face. "Those utensils are for food, not people."
"Whatever. Either way, you still have to choose your weapon."
"Don't worry, they're always on me." He stepped forward with one leg.
Servace clearly didn't get it; he stared at Sanji in confusion. "What, I see nothing."
"Then maybe you should get your eyes checked." He tapped his foot on the boards impatiently.
Realization dawned. "Your feet, huh? Well, I suppose that makes sense, seeing as you can't use your hands right now."
Sanji smirked around his cigarette. "Either way, my legs are all I need to kick your shitty ass back to your shitty ship."
"I'd like to see you try," he scoffed.
"Just remember, you asked for it." And he launched himself forward, jumping for a midair kick.
Servace dodged just in time, leaping from the railing. Sanji's foot slammed down where he had been milliseconds previously, splintering the wood like it was a toothpick.
From the galley door Usopp started to protest, but Nami's warning look stopped him.
Sanji bounced back to the main deck to come into the path of the swinging meat cleaver. He danced backward from the dangerous instrument, just bending enough that it didn't catch him in the stomach. After a few seconds of the awkward retreat he dropped to the ground and spun his leg, using his right hand to steady himself and help his swing. It smacked into Servace's legs, who stumbled back a few inches before swinging the meat cleaver like an axe at his midsection. Sanji rolled and jumped back on his feet, just barely avoiding yet another whistling swing.
He hopped back a few steps and looked down at his stomach. "Shithead. This is my favorite suit jacket," he complained, putting a finger through the new rip in annoyance, though secretly glad that it was all that got shredded.
"So what? Fancy clothes aren't needed to cook."
"No, but they are needed to impress the ladies… Of course, I'm sure that's nothing a brute like yourself could ever understand."
Sanji jumped forward again, spinning his leg around once in range at the man's chest. "Poitrine!"
A huge muscular arm blocked the kick, and while Sanji knew it must have smarted, Servace seemed unfazed. "Pathetic."
Sanji used the block to push himself up and swing his other leg down at his head. "Joue!"
Servace took this hit and stumbled back while Sanji landed a few feet away, straightening up. A thin trickle of blood leaked from where his foot had connected, but Servace was otherwise unharmed.
"By the way," the younger cook began conversationally as the two began a slow circle. "Where exactly do you cook? I mean, do you have a restaurant, or…"
"I had a restaurant before I took to becoming the best," the other answered, sounding cocky and sure. "It was on Palm Island. Right on the beach, highly rated."
"Really? We went to Palm Island; what was it called?"
"Servace's, of course."
Sanji rolled his eye. Could this shithead be any more conceited? And then he remembered something; he realized that Servace's name had seemed familiar before, though he hadn't thought about it then. "Wait, I think… Yeah, we ate there."
The other crewmembers thought back to Palm Island; it had been quite some time ago, right after they left Arabasta…
"We did?" asked Usopp in confusion.
"Oh yeah, I remember that," said Nami, nodding. "We decided to eat there and give Sanji-kun a break."
"I never need a break from cooking for you, Nami-san!" Sanji cooed, flirt mode starting despite the situation.
Servace took this moment when he was seemingly distracted to come rushing at the love-cook.
Sanji, all too aware of his opponent, weaved to the side and spun his foot at Servace's gut. "Flanchet!"
Servace took the hit and stumbled back again, winded. Sanji glared at him, blowing out a good deal of smoke from his cigarette. "Don't interrupt Nami-san!"
The big chef took a few breaths to steady himself and then glared at the blond. "So you went to my restaurant, eh? How was it?"
Sanji took a thoughtful drag. "Well, the salad was limp and couldn't have been the freshest. The wine was a good grade, but certainly not exquisite. The filet mignon was too dry; I had to add sauce, when I shouldn't have had to. The dessert wasn't half bad, but the pie crust was underdone and too doughy. And I know that there's no way you could have gotten Nami-san's mikan daiquiri the way she likes it. Not to mention that Robin-chan's grilled chicken was too tough." He studied his cigarette for a moment. "I don't care what you did to their food," he concluded, jerking his thumb at Luffy and Zoro.
"It was good!" observed Luffy, though as he would eat anything it wasn't saying much. "But I still like Sanji's better."
"Now that you mention it," said Nami slowly, thinking back. "I remember that the food was okay, but nothing like Sanji-kun's." Of course, after eating his food for three meals a day, even the finest cooks in the most expensive restaurants aren't very impressive.
"Yeah, Sanji's is better!" Usopp cheered.
"Way better!" echoed Chopper.
"But mine is far more-"
"Shut up, Usopp."
"Yes, Nami."
Servace was growing livid. "I don't know what any of you are talking about!" he yelled. "I cook the best food in all the world!"
"Perhaps the best food on the island," said Sanji, finishing his cigarette and stamping it out under his foot. "But definitely not the best food on the Grand Line, much less the world. After all, if it was, you wouldn't need to keep me from cooking, would you?"
With a roar, Servace charged at Sanji like a wild boar. He anticipated the attack, got ready to roll to the left and counter with a kick to the man's head-
Servace changed tactics in mid-attack, suddenly swinging his fist from the other side and hitting Sanji square in the jaw. Before he could react, the bigger man was swinging the meat cleaver. It bit into Sanji's right thigh and he gasped in pain before falling to the deck and rolling several feet.
"Sanji-kun!" cried Nami.
The chef started to push himself up using his right hand, but a foot slammed into his chest and he was winded. He flopped back to the deck, fighting to catch his breath.
"Sanji!" Chopper wailed.
"You insulted my restaurant," Servace growled. "You didn't expect me to just let you get away with that, did you?" He stepped forward and kicked Sanji's shoulder, right where, just over a week before, his subordinate had stabbed him with a dagger. The wound was mostly healed, but the blow hurt far worse than it should have, and Sanji gasped again, and tried to grip it with his left hand, only to be thwarted by the cast.
"This is now more than just a duel of reputation," Servace continued, advancing again. "It is a fight to the death for our honor!"
Sanji tensed on the ground, every muscle in his body going stiff. But it was not in anticipation of another blow; it was from outrage.
His whole body trembled violently, but it wasn't from pain; it was in restraint, so he would not beat Servace's head off.
Slowly, very slowly, Sanji stood up. He was slumping a little, shoulder still throbbing, leg pulsing in pain, but he didn't care about that now.
"Honor?" he repeated, voice low and dangerous. "What do you know about honor, you shithead?"
He took a step forward, and he looked so demonic, bangs shadowing his one visible eye, that Servace actually retreated a step. "You worry more about reputation than the quality of your cooking. You use your cooking utensils for battle. You have your subordinates hurt ladies. You stoop to destroying other cooks' hands, their livelihood, for your own gain. And you call all that honorable!?!" He spat on the deck. "You don't know the first thing about honor! You don't know SHIT!"
So saying, he jumped into the air to attack Servace again. "Collier!"
Servace managed to move his head in time, but his shoulder bore the brunt of Sanji's attack; there was a satisfying crunch and Sanji knew he had broken something in Servace's arm. He used the force to twirl in midair and bring his other leg down into his chest. Servace grunted in pain and stumbled back, nearly falling, while Sanji landed neatly before him and began a second wave.
This time Servace was prepared; he blocked with his uninjured arm and swung with the meat cleaver with his hurt one, forcing Sanji to dodge away. The younger cook lost his balance and fell, twisting to catch himself.
Unfortunately, he followed his battle instinct. Right now, his battle instinct was telling him to land on his left hand and jump immediately back into a kick at Servace's chest, but it hadn't taken into account the cast.
Sanji's left hand landed with a loud bang on the deck and he crumpled onto it.
"Sanji!" yelled Usopp and Chopper together.
"Sanji-kun!" added Nami.
Luffy, Zoro, and Robin watched on in silence.
"Guess you still can't work very well with that bum hand, eh?" taunted Servace, watching him. "Isn't that cast a little clunky? Why don't you take it off?"
Sanji got up off his hand and sat there for a moment, as though thinking about something. Then he stood up and turned to face them all.
The tape holding the brace in place was clenched in his teeth, and he was trying as hard as he could to rip it apart.
"What are you doing!?!" yelled Usopp in shock.
"You can't do that!" admonished Chopper. "Your hand will-"
"Chopper!"
The reindeer hushed, looking down at Luffy in confusion and worry.
His captain smiled broadly. "Don't worry; Sanji knows what he's doing."
Meanwhile, Sanji was gnawing at the tape and cast, trying to get them to loosen. With his right hand he tugged at the fingers. "Shitteh cas'," he muttered around the mouthful of brace and tape. "Co' off!"
A kitchen knife that had grown a pair of feet appeared in front of him, and he bent to retrieve them gratefully. "Thanks, Robin-chan." Then he worked the sharp blade into the opening he had created and sliced through the cast.
It fell away, revealing Sanji's sweaty and bruised left hand.
Then, to Nami, Usopp, and Chopper's shock (the rest had expected such, except perhaps Luffy, who simply believed in his nakama), he curled each finger slowly into a fist and then straightened them back out, one at a time.
Then he grinned at Servace. "Yeah, that was a good idea; wonder why I didn't think of it sooner."
Servace scowled. "So your other hand still works; that'll just make it more fun to crush them again."
"I'm not letting you touch them ever again!" And then Sanji went once more into the breach, and this time he was unleashing his full fury.
Ribs, chest, back, legs… Sanji twirled in a dance of anger and violence around Servace, hitting every part of him in quick succession. Soon he was in his trademark handstand… finally with both hands holding him up. "Cotelette! Selle!" He spun his legs, first into his ribs, then into his back. Then he was right behind Servace.
"Anti-Manner Kick COURSE!!!"
His leg slammed up into Servace's spine, sending him flying and then skidding across the deck. Sanji glared after him, then huffed in contempt and looked away, reaching into his pocket for a new cigarette.
Slowly, Servace rose back to his feet…
And the sound of a cocking pistol froze Sanji with the cigarette partway to his lips.
"I WILL be the best!" Servace roared, and fired.
Sanji, luckily, moved in time, spinning off to the side. The bullet embedded itself harmlessly in the cabin wall.
"Why you-!"
"Luffy! You said to let Sanji handle this, remember!?!" cried Zoro, restraining his captain. The rubberman calmed and stood back, but he didn't seem at all happy about it.
Servace started to fire again, but Sanji was ducking and weaving toward him, cigarette forgotten on the deck behind him. The blond chef jumped and spun over his head, landing behind him again. This time, he kicked Servace down flat and wrenched the gun from his hands.
Then Sanji was straddling the bigger man, holding the gun and glaring in hate and anger, first at his hands, then at Servace, back and forth.
Then, slowly, he lowered the gun barrel to rest on Servace's unprotected right hand.
He lingered there, breathing heavily, pointer finger stroking the trigger.
"Go ahead," the defeated chef growled. "Do it. I took your hands, now you can take mine."
Sanji just glared down at the gun, at the man who had made his life miserable, who had almost ruined it forever.
"Sanji-kun," whispered Nami.
Sanji's finger tensed on the trigger. He considered.
Then he pulled.
The bullet flew from the raised gun and up into the air, disappearing into the sky.
When no pain exploded in Servace's hand, he growled angrily. "Don't you get it, idiot. This is your chance for revenge!"
"Are you really complaining, shithead?" Sanji asked scornfully. He brought his arm down and flung the gun into the sea. "I don't see a reason to."
"But why?"
"Why?"
Sanji got off the man's back and walked back to where he had dropped his cigarette.
"Because, unlike you, I could never take another chef's livelihood, no matter how bad-or good-they were."
And with that, he retrieved his cigarette, lit it, and walked past his nakama to the galley door.
"So…" he asked slowly, looking at Nami pointedly. "Would you like a drink, Nami-san?"
"Sanji-kun," she whispered again.
And then she hit him. "Don't scare me like that!"
"Aah! My apologies, Nami-san! You are most beautiful when you're rightfully angry!"
Before he could say much more, she was hugging him, and so were Usopp and Chopper, and one of Robin's hands was on his shoulder.
All Sanji could do-all he wanted to do-was sink into their hug and smile.
Zoro and Luffy stood over Servace, glaring down at him.
"I would kill you right now," Zoro informed him flatly. "But since the cook dropped it, I will, too."
Luffy cracked his knuckles. "Come near my nakama again, and I will destroy you."
Servace only nodded weakly and flopped on the deck.
Robin, standing at the railing, now motioned to the others. "I believe that is their ship approaching."
Sure enough, a ship grew closer to them, several frantic men running around on deck.
"Hey, there's the row boat!"
"Captain and the Baron must've gotten on that ship!"
"Yeah, but I don't see them!"
"Could they have been defeated?"
"Idiot! No one can defeat Captain or the Baron!"
"Go get the other one, Usopp!" Zoro called over his shoulder. "We're gonna send them back now."
Usopp pulled himself out of the group hug and ran off to the front of the deck, reappearing moments later dragging an unconscious Danni by his ankle. He dumped him unceremoniously over the rail onto the main deck.
"Thanks, Usopp!" called Luffy. Then he grabbed the rail with both his hands and walked backward, like the band on a slingshot.
Zoro got the idea and, with Robin's help on the big guy, moved them all between Luffy's arms.
"Yosh!" yelled Luffy happily. "Gomu Gomu no…"
"Slingshot?" suggested Usopp practically.
"Return to sender?" supplied Nami.
"Reaper?" tried Robin in normal macabre fashion.
"How about "Gomu Gomu no GET THE HELL OFF OUR SHIP"!" suggested Sanji, finally released from the hug.
"Yeah, that works," agreed Luffy. And then he lifted his legs and shot forward, sending the entire group catapulting across the ocean and into the side of their ship, the Marmalade.
"Someone should catch that hammer before he sinks to the bottom," Robin observed coolly.
Sanji looked out to where the crew was rushing around frantically to retrieve their captain and other crewmates and rolled his eye. "Who cares? They overstayed their welcome, anyway."
"SAAANJIII!!!" Luffy rocketed up to the galley and landed next to his cook. He smiled at him happily. "Your hands are better! So now you can make me some meat!"
"Luffy…" said Nami slowly, appearing behind him with one hand raised in a fist and eyes demonically shadowed. "HE JUST MADE YOU DINNER!" And she whacked him.
"Aw, but Nami…"
"It's okay, Nami-san," said Sanji cheerfully. "I'll make us all something."
"But Sanji-kun, we just had-"
"A pretty big fight," he finished for her, motioning at the blood on deck, the injury to his leg as well as Usopp's. "Some food would probably be good for us."
"Yosh!" cried Luffy, glad to see that things were going his way on the food issue.
"Besides, Nami-san," said Sanji, looking down at his left hand and moving the fingers experimentally. "Nothing would make me happier."
She stared at him for a moment, then sighed and flung up her hands. "I don't know what I'm going to do with you guys… Okay, fine." But she was smiling.
"But then, Sanji, you have to be careful with your hands and let them get lots of rest," Chopper instructed, already looking at the wounds on Usopp. "And let me look at that leg."
"Of course, doctor."
"Asshole! You calling me "doctor" does NOT make me happy, bastard!"
Sanji laughed and patted the actually very happy Chopper's head.
"Great, now I don't have to cook anymore. Though I'm sure you're all going to miss my cooking terribly, eh? The great Captain Usopp was a wonderful cook, right?"
"Eh, no."
"Sorry, Usopp."
"We'd rather have Sanji, Long Nose-kun."
"MEAT!"
"I heard you the first time! No, Usopp, I'm back for good now." He smiled and put a hand on the younger boy's shoulder. "But you really did do a good job. Thanks."
Usopp smiled. "Well, of course I did! I'm the great Captain Usopp!"
"Glad to see your hand isn't dead forever, Cook-san. It should be, you know."
"Robin-chwan is so sweet to care about me!"
Sanji started to go into the galley to make them a late-night snack when a voice stopped him.
"Oi, dartboard!"
Sanji's vein popped in his head, and he slowly turned around. "What do you want, marimo?"
Zoro was the only one still on the deck, looking up at him with raised eyebrows. "You broke your promise."
"What promise?"
"That when your hands started working again, you said you'd kick my ass first. Not like I'd let you, but still." He folded his arms. "Well?"
Sanji stared back down at him, then smirked, taking a drag of his cigarette. "A promise is a promise, shitty swordsman." And before Chopper could say another word about resting his hands or his leg or any other doctorly thing, the cook had jumped over the rail.
Zoro and Sanji fell back into the familiar rhythm of their fighting, not as hard as normal for the cook's sake, but still just as intense. The two men were happy that this was back, this brotherly activity that somehow let them know they cared about each other.
Luffy smiled and watched. His nakama were all okay now, and everything was right with the world.
The End
A/N: Sniff sniff… It's over!!! Waaah!!! I really hope you guys enjoyed this. Thanks to everyone who was along for the ride; those who read, favorited, alerted, and reviewed! I wish I could give you all a Sanji-shaped cookie! Thanks for making my first chapter fanfic a success!
"Either way, my legs are all I need to kick your shitty ass back to your shitty ship."
Obviously, I stopped worrying about cleaning up his language.
"Poitrine!"
"Breast meat." By the way, I'm naming his attacks based on what he's attacking, mostly, rather then what he usually does during said kick. So it's not entirely accurate. Meh.
"Joue!"
"Cheek."
"It was on Palm Island. Right on the beach, highly rated."
Not actually a One Piece island. Obviously; Oda's much better at naming than I am.
"Flanchet!"
"Stomach."
"Collier!"
"Neck."
"Cotelette! Selle!"
"Ribs" and "lower back."
And then she hit him. "Don't scare me like that!"
At first Nami was going to simply hug him, but I decided she should at least be somewhat mad at him for almost blowing the guys hands off and almost ruining his own and all that good stuff. So she hit him. And then she hugged him. All is as it should be.
"Reaper?" tried Robin in normal macabre fashion.
Robin said different stuff here, including "hangman" and "flying darkness of despair." It's fun to get Robin to said random creepy things!
"Eh, no."
In case you didn't get it, this is Nami talking.
And now, dum de dum dum dum!!! It's time for the teaser to my next big project, entitled either "Ethereal Madness" or "Room for Two" (haven't decided which yet).
All Sanji knew, at that moment, was that Zoro was going down, and he was the only one close enough to help. So he did what he was supposed to do; he ran toward his nakama.
The shitty boy with the permanent grin tried to block his path, but he didn't let it deter him, simply using his face as a way to jump over the other pirates and land right next to Zoro just as the swordsman's head hit the deck.
"Oi, marimo! You okay?" He leaned down and put a hand on Zoro's shoulder…
And then a green light seemed to rise from his body and engulf Sanji.
The cook felt his whole body go strangely numb and cold and he sunk to the deck, staring blankly at the swordsman. For a moment, a blue aura rose from his body and seemed to fight with the green light; then the two mixed into a teal and sank back into Sanji's body.
He passed out.
…
"We got what we came here for," he complained, hefting Zoro's body. "Let's get out."
The other nodded. "Agreed." And then the two were gone into the night with their crew.
…
"Sanji-kun! Sanji-kun, are you okay?"
What are you talking about, woman? I'm not that ero-cook, I'm Zoro!
"Sanji-kun! Wake up, please!"
I already told you, I'm not-
"Nami-san? What happened?"
What the hell was that!?! Why did I just talk like that dartboard?
"What the hell!?! Zoro!?!"
"Sanji-kun? What's wrong?"
"I just think I've finally cracked; I'm hearing moss-heads in my brain. Where is he, anyway?"
"They took him, Sanji-kun. Didn't you see it?"
"What do you mean, took me? I'm right here, damn woman!"
"S-Sanji-kun!?!"
"I'm not Sanji, damn it, I'm- Of course I'm Sanji, what are you- WHAT THE HELL!?!"
Coming soon to a computer screen near you…
In case you didn't get it (it's kind of confusing because I was skipping stuff), Zoro's soul has somehow been placed inside Sanji's body. But they didn't switch; Sanji is still very much around. Oh dear…
Sad to see the story end but thinking back on fond times during the journey, this is Dandy Wonderous, signing off.