This is so far past overdue it's not even funny. I changed the order of the chapter outline quite a bit, meaning the final two chapters are finished. The trick is getting there. For reference's sake, this is 11/15
Also, this was partially to work out writer's block on Blood Runs Red, so the update for that shouldn't be too far behind. :)
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"The Jupiter Eight? Besides being a silly name for an official vessel, it is also unfamiliar. Would you care to enlighten me now, Shepard?"
"It's not precisely an official vessel; those are in short supply, and the passengers don't really have an official status. I think I'll let you stew for awhile longer."
Liara rolled her eyes; out of respect for Shepard's desire to surprise her just this once, Liara had refrained from using any of the tools at her disposal to uncover the identity of the 'old friend' Shepard was so keen to see. It had been amusing at first to throw out a name every once in a while, watching for any telling reactions on Shepard's part, but the woman was maddeningly self-composed.
Process of elimination had resulted in a very short list that ranged everywhere from Diana Allers to her own father; Liara sincerely hoped she was wrong on both those counts, but this would be the moment of truth.
To make matters even worse, Beni knew exactly who this mystery guest was and had proved entirely resistant to any form of bribery.
Jupiter, though- named for a planet in the same system as earth. That would indicate a human vessel, but need it necessarily be carrying Humans?
"They'll be coming aboard soon. I'm heading to the bridge if you care to accompany me."
"I take it Beni's already there?"
"She's always eager to meet someone new, Joker says she's been bugging him for the past half-hour."
It wasn't quite the answer Liara was looking for, but the list of potentials became ever shorter. Shaking her head in mock despair, she took the offered arm, deliberately pushing Shepard off balance.
"I've decided I loathe surprises."
"A little unpredictability keeps you on your toes."
"I will remind you of those words someday in the near future. You will not like it any more then than I do now."
"Duly noted."
"Is it Eve?"
"Not likely." Shepard snorted. "You can wait a few more minutes."
Shepard whistled a snatch of song, as they waited for the lift, pointedly not glancing in Liara's direction.
"Kasumi. It's Kasumi."
Shepard sobered instantly, "I thought we could meet with her later, when we go for the memorial service. Dr. Michelle and she can just meet us there; no use pulling everyone off the Citadel only to head straight back."
The door slid open and Shepard practically scurried inside, pulling Liara after; clearly she was hitting nearer the mark with each name. Really there was only one more she could think of that might even remotely fit Shepard's occasional hints…
"Is it Samantha Traynor?"
Shepard blanched; "See, I just really don't understand why you insist on asking questions designed specifically to spoil my surprise- and if you must, why leave the most obvious for last?"
Liara smirked, "Think of all that gloating you would have missed out on. For the record, Ms. Traynor was never a particular friend of mine; I can't help but suspect you have some nefarious purpose for inviting her aboard."
"I thought you liked playing chess? I don't have the patience for it, and Sam can-"
"Samantha." Liara cut in, slanting a sharp look at her bondmate.
"Traynor could give you some respectable competition. Trust me, I think you could find a use for some of the gadgets she's tinkering with. Or at least a market." Shepard nodded to herself, doubtless already constructing a needlessly elaborate strategy for infiltrating the market of every known world.
"I am no kind of merchant."
"Not with that attitude, but this isn't really your run-of-the-mill merchandise either. Mordin's with her." Shepard added helpfully.
A collaborative effort between a reformed mad scientist and a disappointed idealist? That could mean either a work of surpassing genius or unmitigated disaster.
If Shepard was enthusiastic about it, that probably meant the latter. Either way, it was bound to be entertaining.
"Run of the mill? The meaning is apparent, but I am sure that's a descriptor I haven't heard from you before. What is its etymology?"
"See? There's a question for Samantha. She loves trivia."
Liara bit back a pithy response, "I look forward to speaking with her."
Shepard grinned, pulled her closer. "Glad to hear it. You wouldn't believe the red tape I had to deal with, getting this stuff off Feros."
"Feros? Nothing good ever came from that planet."
The pneumatic hiss of the lift door cut off any further comments she might have cared to make. Shepard was already stepping out onto the bridge, seeking out Beni's small form amongst those gathered to greet their visitors; she was happy enough, arms twined about Miranda's neck, faithful varren curled nearby. Evidently no one save Liara herself and Joker had yet realized the damage an adult varren could do to sensitive equipment; they remained alone in their resolve to restrict Jax to the living area.
Still, for a special occasion, it couldn't hurt.
Joker made his way over to Shepard, casting a baleful glance back at the varren that had deliberately stretched itself across his path. "Doctor Mordin and specialist Traynor are already aboard. I tried to comm you, but-"
"Busy." Shepard chirped. Liara ignored the little voice that said she should inform Joker Shepard had managed to doze off while indulging in a rare hot bath. Goddess knew he had enough ammo for his persistent teasing, and good-natured though she was, Shepard would complain fiercely if Liara "went over to the enemy."
Come to it, she had been sleeping more often of late. Of course, that could be as much a side effect of more time spent rough-housing with Beni as it could any illness. Still, if the situation had been reversed, Shepard would probably have tricked her into the infirmary for a 'routine' scan; no reason she couldn't return the favor when all this was through.
Liara started at Shepard's nudge, "Did you catch that, or should I repeat?"
"Let them rest, meet in Starboard observation later. I heard you."
"Better make it port." Joker shifted slightly, very pointedly avoiding looking anywhere near the vicinity of Beni.
"Why port? Drinks are in starboard."
"So's the ruined ottoman. And a few scattered pieces of chair."
Someone groaned pitifully, it took Liara a second to register she and Shepard had voiced roughly the same thought in tandem.
"How bad?" Liara squeezed lightly, offering support. Shepard rarely allowed herself to become attached to any of the furnishings aboard ship, but there were more than a few memories attached to both the observation decks. Changing such an integral part of them would not be a welcome surprise.
"Well, if we keep the lights off all the time I'm sure you wouldn't notice-"
Shepard spun on her heel and left the deck as quickly as she had come, leaving Liara alone with a still-sheepish Joker.
"I guess this would be a bad time to mention Jax may or may not have chewed up one of her models?"
"You guess right; did Beni send you to deliver the news?" Liara shifted a disapproving glance at the child, watching as she curled even further into Miranda, offering a crooked, panicked smile.
"I volunteered. She thinks this might be the mistake that gets her tossed out the air lock."
"In other words, she manipulated you."
"You could call it that. Or you could say I implied Shepard was going to throw her out the airlock and ended up volunteering to deliver the news because Miranda said she was going to use me for target practice if the little one didn't stop crying." Joker caught his breath, watching for any sign of a reaction.
Liara was beginning to consider the very real possibility that half the reason Beni got away with so much was because the Normandy had become a haven for overgrown children.
"I'll speak with her. Spacing is out of the question, grounding is not." And it looks like once again, I'll have to be the villain. Shepard had already made her exodus, presumably to inspect the damage wrought by a restless varren, but it also served to conveniently remove her from the area when sentence was passed down.
Liara made her way to Miranda, exchanging a knowing glance with her as Beni reluctantly slid to the floor. She didn't even have a chance to draw breath before Beni was offering excuses.
"He wasn't on the couch! I fell asleep, and when I woke up-" Beni's eyes widened impossibly, hands flying up in a gesture of surrender often employed by Shepard when she knew an argument was lost but wasn't willing to say so aloud.
"And when you woke up?"
Beni winced, "Jax had made a mess."
A booming voice from the direction of the lift set everyone save Liara and Miranda snapping to attention. "A Mess? That is not a mess, Beni. That is a disaster area- I have seen enough of them to know!"
Shepard made her way across the bridge, almost visibly restraining her temper. On a purely intellectual level, Liara almost hoped that last fragile grip on calmness would slip. It had been at least a solid year since any one of the crew had seen Shepard in a towering fury, and the longer she suppressed it, the worse its eventual release was bound to be.
Still, this was not the occasion, and she would just as soon their daughter didn't learn the art of the Temper Tantrum from a mistress of the craft.
"Shepard, Beni was just explaining-"
"How the observation deck was reduced to ruins in the space of an hour?"
"I'm sure that's an exaggeration." Of course, if they could remove themselves to another deck instead of discussing this before a dozen pairs of sympathetic eyes, it would make it that much easier to reason with her.
Miracle of miracles, Shepard paused for a moment, nodded grudgingly. "Only just. I'm serious; the ottoman has to go and the couch isn't looking too great either." Finally, she glanced around, taking in the gaping crew, a quailing Beni and settling her eyes on the varren in a way that promised retribution.
"You should have a look. And Beni should head straight for her quarters." Beni swallowed convulsively, nodded once and bolted for the lift with Jax on her heels. Liara caught Shepard's arm as she turned to follow, shaking her head mutely. Bad enough to be dressed down publicly, worse to be seen shedding a few embarrassed tears and worse still when "the enemy" offered comfort. Shepard seemed puzzled, but she nodded her agreement and awkwardly tried to avoid making eye contact with anyone save Liara as the lift doors shut.
Joker was the first to recover, making straight for the pilot's chair before Shepard questioned his involvement- wise of him. Miranda visibly debated whether to offer a word before finally stepping back, providing them with an illusion of solitude, even if every last person on the bridge was desperately trying to pretend their ears weren't cocked to catch every word.
"I think you should wait for a few hours before you speak with her. Give her a chance to collect herself."
"I would if this were the first time, but she hasn't been training that varren properly and its become a menace!" Shepard hissed, leaning closer when she noticed the growing amount of attention fixed on them.
"I suppose you see now why I was hesitant to bring one aboard? It is their nature to be destructive."
"Nothing training couldn't fix; that was half the deal, she trains it and looks after it-"
"She's six!"
"Old enough to take responsibility. I thought you would be on my side."
"This isn't a matter of taking sides, it's common sense-" Liara cut off sharply, "Never mind. We can discuss this later."
"I think now is a pretty-"
"Shepard. Later." Liara loved her bond-mate, truly, but Shepard did have a tendency to become carried away, and it inevitably left Liara with a nearly overpowering urge to kick her in the shins like a bratty child. Fortunately, Shepard must have caught her tone or perhaps even learned to recognize the glint in her eyes. She subsided, stepping aside to gesture to the lift.
"After you."
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By the time she had reached the corridor leading to her quarters, Beni was sobbing hard enough that wiping away the tears did less than nothing to clear her vision.
This had definitely been one of her bigger mistakes. Mama would say all her fears about bringing a varren aboard were justified, only this time she would have the crew on her side. What if she ordered that Jax be put off-ship the next time they docked? Beni crouched in the hallway, burying her fingers in bristly fur and sobbing into Jax's neck.
"Why can't you be good?" She choked out, clinging tighter until Jax began to whine. Nothing worked; not the treats Aunt Kelly has promised for good behavior, not the 'time-outs' in the cargo hold Uncle Garrus had suggested she try, and now both her parents were united in their dislike of the varren. And it was her fault; if she hadn't let Jax into the room, if she hadn't dozed off, this wouldn't be happening.
"Relative concepts, good and evil; intricacies would be incomprehensible to an inferior species."
Beni shot to her feet, dashing a clenched fist across her eyes swiftly and drawing a deep breath lest another sob escape. The creature gazing curiously down at her from what seemed an impossible height to her eyes was one of the 'guests' that had come aboard earlier. A salarian that Uncle Garrus had insisted she mustn't speak to lest they couldn't shut him up. Now she had managed to ruin even that; though at least this was something considerably less likely to get her into any serious trouble.
She scowled, not feeling particularly chatty; now that she had been cornered, Beni wanted nothing more than to sprint the remaining distance to her quarters and throw herself down on the bed. Now she couldn't for fear of offending a guest.
"Pardon, was the question rhetorical?" He blinked rapidly, studying her in much the same way she had seen Papa scour star-charts, leaving no part unanalyzed.
"What's rhetorical?" That should be a safe question. Safer than admitting she had forgotten his name in the brief time since their introduction.
"Hmm. It's- No, not quite right- It's- No, too complex… a question posed for the sake of making a statement. Yes, that is sufficient, I think." He was shifting restlessly from foot to foot, eyes darting around the corridor eagerly; obviously he was reconsidering whatever thought had convinced him to speak with her.
Evidently he took her silence for encouragement, because the next moment he was speaking again. "Rhetorical, derived of rhetoric, relating to the practice of-"
"Who are you?" Beni cut in, snapping her fingers lightly to summon Jax to her side for comfort's sake. Uncle Garrus said interrupting the salarian wasn't rude, only practical; Beni was beginning to understand precisely what he had meant.
"Who am I? Interesting question. I am a-"
"What's your name?" She wiped the last tear from her lashes, surprised to find her cheeks already dry. Just as well; it was embarrassing to be caught like that, whining and making a mess. Mama never did it, Papa didn't either.
"Doctor Mordin Solus." He bowed with a flourish, pressing slender fingers to his brow as though preparing to remove a cap, Beni couldn't quite stifle the giggle that slipped free. She was familiar with the name. Papa said there were stories she couldn't hear until she was older, muttering things under her breath that made Mama kick her under the table, but Aunt Kelly had let slip a few things, namely that Doctor Solus was a decent singer when he could be coaxed into it.
Aunt Kelly inevitably snuck a glance at the cabinet where Mama kept the bottles Beni wasn't allowed to handle when she said this, and smile wide enough that Beni could never help but to smile back, even if she knew she was still missing part of the joke.
"You're the singer."
"A scientist-"
"Salarian?" Beni grinned toothily, disregarding the faint flicker of a puzzled frown that crossed his face. She'd heard the song word for word once from a teasing Uncle Joker, but she could hardly remember any more than that one phrase. Aunt Miranda was the only one aboard who enjoyed Gilbert and Sullivan; she was also the only one aboard who didn't insist on playing her musical preferences over the intercom.
He hadn't had a chance to respond before her parents rounded the corner, pausing to take in the scene; the look her mother sent her said plainly she should have been in her own room by now. Beni waited until that gaze had shifted to her erstwhile companion before scampering straight to her door and through, giving it a command to lock before she hurtled onto her bed and burrowed under the neatly made covers. Jax bounded up after her, sharp claws digging into her skin until she pushed him off defensively. So much trouble. And it looked like her meeting in the hallway with Doctor Mordin hadn't earned her a reprieve.
She buried her face in her pillow and drew a ragged breath, slipping into sleep in a matter of seconds.
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Shepard waited until the door had slid shut behind Beni before turning back to Mordin, "Was she bothering you?"
"Very inquisitive, not troublesome. Doctor T'Soni, a pleasure to see you again; have you reviewed the specifications I forwarded?"
Liara's glance warned Shepard of trouble to come; was this how Beni had felt when she had cornered her in the CIC? A small sliver of sympathy slipped through Shepard's frustration; not nearly enough to make her reconsider the extra chores she intended to set as penance, but enough that she considered lending a hand here and there.
"Liara hasn't had a chance to review anything. I didn't pass it on yet."
"Ah. Very counter-intuitive. I assumed she would be acquainted with the 'crete and planned accordingly."
"Crete?"
"Placeholder 'til we think up something a little more ear-catching." Shepard murmured, "Mordin had another suggestion, but I couldn't get my mouth around it."
"Organic compound derived of infected soil on Feros. It shows regenerative capabilities that should permit for self-repair of minor damage to living structures."
Liara smiled noncommittally, but Shepard could see the calculating gleam in her eye; the potential uses for such a substance were not inconsiderable, and Liara was sure to see a few unique ways it might be applied. Just now, though, she seemed more interested in seeing to Beni.
Well, there was one way to ensure Mordin was sufficiently distracted…. "I commissioned a redesign of your old lab, Doctor. A few improvements were made here and there."
Mordin wasn't so rude as to say aloud precisely what he thought of her organizational skills, but the tightening of his lips suggested he was deeply concerned for the status of the equipment she had dared to lay hands on.
"With permission, Shepard, I will make my way there immediately." He didn't wait for any such thing before scurrying toward the lift, barely acknowledging Shepard's assent.
"Are you coming in?" Liara nodded to the door, not bothering to conceal a worried frown.
"Should I, or do you think it would upset her again? I'm not hearing any tears, maybe you should be the one to deliver the news."
"Not this time, Shepard." A wry smile, shake of the head, "This once, you're going to be the one to tell her she's done wrong. She'll take it better from you."
"This is my least favorite part of being a mom. Can we skip this with the next one? I'll take diaper duty if you take all-powerful arbiter of fate."
"I would think this would come naturally to you. Joker still brags about some of the dressings-down you've given him in the past."
"It's different. Joker doesn't cry, and he's not my kid." Shepard blanched, "Thinking of it, his parents must have been saints."
"Nevertheless, you're the one that lost your temper; I think you should be the one to match the punishment to the crime."
Maybe make an apology of my own. Maybe."
"Do you require backup for this mission, Commander?"
Shepard snorted, "No. I've got it. I think. Wait out here for me?"
"Of course."
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Naturally Beni was sleeping, because the universe was determined to make Shepard alone the villain of this piece. She made her way reluctantly to the side of the bed, batting away an inquisitive varren's wet nose, snarling softly when it dared to growl at her for the offense. The galaxy's hero, reduced to squabbling with mutts and terrifying small children. Wonderful.
"Beni, you awake?" Not even a peep.
Shepard settled on the bedside, pulling the rumpled covers back until she could see Beni's face in full. Definitely asleep, and pouting even now; she couldn't be too tired- it had only been a matter of minutes since she had rushed in here. Then again, sleeping anywhere at any time was one of her special gifts. Shepard nudged her shoulder lightly, rocking until she came awake with a jolt, scanning the room quickly before she subsided.
Shepard couldn't help being a little proud of that; it was a trick Beni had learned from example and would hopefully maintain until she needed it in earnest.
"So, about the furniture." Good. Calm, even voice. Matter-of-fact, no need to shout. "We're going to have to replace it, and that's credits I didn't want to spend."
"'M sorry." Beni murmured, hand reaching out to clasp Jax's leg until the varren curled up on the coverlet again.
"Glad to hear it, but that doesn't change the fact that you let Jax ruin it in the first place. That's not sat, Beni."
"Are you going to take him away?" Tears welled again, lips trembling with the effort of holding them back. No wonder she was panicking.
"Jax stays; we don't abandon crew." Beni brightened immediately, hardly dimming even when Shepard added her provisions. "You're both confined to quarters for the rest of the evening. You have allowances for supper and ship-wide emergencies only."
Her sigh of relief was cut short when Shepard continued, "Furthermore, as of this moment you have an allowance to be paid upon completion of tasks I will determine sometime tonight to be implemented tomorrow morning. Every last credit of it is going toward replacing that furniture until I'm satisfied the damage is paid back. Lastly, Jax needs a leash; a leash you will keep him on at all times until he's learned some manners. Clear?"
"Aye, aye."
"Don't get cute." Shepard poked teasingly at her ribs, reassured by the sleepy chuckle half-muffled in the pillow. Now or never. "And I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have yelled at you on the bridge." Shepard waited expectantly for some assurance of forgiveness, but none was forthcoming, Beni had already dozed off again, hand still resting protectively over the varren's paw.
Shepard watched her sleep peacefully for a few minutes more before dragging herself to her feet and making her way back to the door. The Normandy would never have that white-picket fence Sam had made so much of, that dratted varren was no kind of golden retriever and their family was… unconventional at best, but Shepard couldn't help but think it suited her just fine.
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And Mordin lives because I've been wreaking enough havoc with canon that this should be a pardonable sin. Besides, finals are coming up and it would be bad luck not to resurrect the (arguably) smart one.