CHAPTER 24 – THE REAPING

-Elena-

"I don't know, Elena." Stefan is squinting; the low sun glowing on his skin, reflecting amber-warm in his eyes, catching the golden brown of his hair that is usually concealed by the darker, chestnut tresses that I've ran my fingers through hundreds of times. "I don't know what I'm doing anymore, without you."

With his eyes hidden and that frown on his face, I am not sure if his tired, frustrated voice is a good thing or bad.

I won't leave anything up to chance. Not now. Not with what feels like a crack in the stone-cold wall that there has been between us since the day I came home from dropping Jeremy and Bonnie at the airport. Since the night he spent with Katherine. Since the morning he discovered what she'd done to us. To him.

Without spending much time inspecting him for clues of what he means, I give Stefan long enough to inhale before I start in – picking up my proverbial sword and fighting for him the way I should have so many weeks ago!

"I'll do better, Stefan." No matter how badly I want to give him the space that I think he probably desires, I can't – the gravity, our frequency… the way he just licked his lips and now they shine in the sunlight, smooth and soft – I move towards him, closing the short distance between us in small, cautious steps and talking the whole time in an effort to keep him from noticing my closing in and him backing away. "I'll show you every single day how much you mean to me. I know I've taken you for granted for so long and I know you deserve better than that."

"Elena."

"I've been so stupid – immature! - to not make sure you felt as loved and as cherished as you make me feel, Stefan. I make mistakes all the time, but I swear, if you'll just come home and give me another chance, I'll never make that mistake again." I don't know if I reached for his hand, or if he reached for mine – maybe we reached at the same time – but the grazing of each of his fingers slipping in between mine sends a warm tremor up my arm that resonates in my chest, stealing my breath, stopping my vocal chords.

"Elena, I –" I interrupt him his interruption again. I can't hear him tell me no. I can't take his rejection.

"Stefan, I love you. For thousands of reasons, I love you…" Damn my shaking voice. I've got to get through this unplanned proposition, this selling of my devotion to the man who sees through me like I'm glass. "We can leave. We can go anywhere. I don't need Mystic Falls, I don't need the house or my brother. I don't need anything but you and Allie and Grayson." I'm speaking faster, almost begging now, and Stefan's hand, now against my face, his fingers slipping into my hair, it just causes my speech and heart rate to quicken even more. "I'll do anything you want me to do, Stefan!" His lightly callused thumb catches the first tear that falls, wiping it away as he's done so many times – always there to catch my tears, to save me, to love me. "Please come home. I just need anot-"

My words are stopped by his mouth, my face now cradled in his hands.

I don't know how to explain to you, how to describe… if there are even words in the human language to clarify the way my lips feel against Stefan's! It's some kind of mix of intoxication and sobering, stirring and ataractic, just wanton enough to feel slightly sinful and miraculous enough to leave my entire being stilled – both mind and body - by the slipping of his tongue against my bottom lip and the nearly sweet saliva left in my mouth when he pulls away, breathing in my exhale.

For a moment, I'm paralyzed, but I can't tell you if its only because of that captivating kiss, the tight-wrapping of our gravity against our bodies, or because I don't want to know if this is a goodbye kiss. With my hands flat on his chest, I keep my eyes closed, my lips slightly parted, and send up a silent prayer.

Please God, even if I've done nothing right in my entire 26 years, I'm begging you to please not let him leave me… I'm not strong enough.

Then I open my eyes, slowly revealing Stefan's soft, half smile and perfect white teeth before I absorb the courage I get from his sweet grin and look up into his emerald green eyes.

"Can I talk now?" He gives a half laugh, pushing my hair back off of my shoulders as I nod yes.

"Elena, I love you. I don't know what I was thinking – what I was doing, moving out… it was foolish and so… just so wrong."

When I smile – a huge, cheeky grin that squints my eyes and pushes out the remaining bit of tears that had pooled at my lashes – I quickly wipe them from my cheeks and take Stefan's hands from my face, leaving small kisses on the palms of his hands.

"Then that is a yes?" I tease, looking up at my husband's beautiful Roman face looking right back down at me with a matching, purely happy smile.

"That is a yes."

-Caroline-

I'm happy.

I mean, I'm not not happy… I'm just, well, frankly I'm not convinced. And I guess that's fine except Stefan is giving me that head down, eyes up glare thing that he does when he's getting angry and it's all because I'm overjoyed that he and Elena are back together.

"What?" Even in a hushed tone, talking quietly as I've just put Matt back to sleep, Stefan's voice is completely readable – frustrated. "You want to say something? Say it."

"I…" How do I put this without sounding like a nay-sayer? How do I tell my best friend that the last six weeks will have been for nothing – all of the late nights in misery wondering about Elena, all of the heartbreak – taking her back after nothing more than a sales-pitch and a play on his love for her… it's not what he'd had in mind when he started this whole thing. "It's just – Stefan. I…"

"You think it's too soon." He says – a statement, not a question… closer to an accusation. Just like how he could tell that my yay that's great and golf-clap was less than excited, Stefan can see the truth on my face – my tired, makeup-less face. "It doesn't matter how long I stay away from her, Caroline, you know I can never unlove her…" I sigh, not sure of what I'm trying to say and maybe missing Klaus as Stefan once again reminds me of how unconditional love should be. "And furthermore, I don't want to."

"No, I know. I do…" I sit up, clasping my hands together in my lap with my knees squeezed together – nervous. Stefan and I can talk about anything and everything – and we have. Our years we spent in solitude together, we only had each other and the friendship that developed was much more than any kind of temporary romantic relationship. I know Stefan. And it's because I know him that I'm nervous about approaching this subject – Elena. The untouchable, sacrosanct. "But what happens when Katherine has the baby? Your baby, Stefan?" I don't have the sensitive hearing like I used to, but I catch the sound of his teeth clenching. "What happens when things get really real and there is a tiny little boy or girl in your hands and Damon turns on us and Katherine pulls some crazy stunt and all that's left is what Elena will do?"

"And you think that keeping my distance is the best way?" Stefan asks with a superficial tone to his words.

"No, Stefan. You do." When he realizes what I'm saying, he looks away from me, staring into the fire as I continue. "You started all of this because you know that when it all hits the fan, Elena is going to break. You were tricked into sleeping with Katherine and that nearly sent her over the edge… watching you with Katherine's baby, seeing you taking care of them once Damon finds out. Elena isn't going to be able to handle it… I don't know of many people who could!"

Through his thoughts, Stefan asks, "You wouldn't be able to? Handle it, I mean."

My head is shaking no even as I try to seem stronger than I know I am by saying, "I'm not sure, Stefan. It would be really difficult…" Uncomfortable with the way my body betrayed me, telling the unspoken truth, I change the subject back to Elena. "Maybe she's too young."

A furrowed brow and cocked-to-the side head tells me to continue as he huffs, "You're the same age, Caroline."

"She's lost four years of her life to compulsion. Years before that to grief! And God only knows what kind of post-traumatic stress all of the threats she's lived through have caused." I see his eyelids twitch a bit, his lips purse slightly, and it dawns on me that Stefan may have never considered the lasting affects of all of the horrible things that Elena has seen and lived through, all of it so soon after her parents died. "Elena needs some time to try and grow up."

"And to do that I should be out of the picture?" Stefan stands, unrolling the sleeves of his button up shirt. "How is that supposed to help anyone? My children included."

I consider my response – trying to choose the right words as Stefan is getting angry with me, with the situation, fastening the cuffs of his shirt with a snarl on his face.

"Not out of the picture, Stefan, just safely distanced until she can get herself together. Until you know that bumps in the road won't completely derail her at a moments notice." I stand too, much shorter than him but I feel like we're equals none-the-less. "And that is with Allie and Grayson in mind… Allie can hear your thoughts and who knows what else! You've got to take that into consideration now, Stefan."

I spent quite a few years in a dysfunctional household. With my mom angry with my dad and my dad remorseful and removed from the daily happenings of our family. My parents divorced before I was in the fifth grade, but to this day I can remember horrible days in my childhood when they were arguing… how I wished to hide away in my dollhouse when things got really tense between them. Poor Allie. My poor little niece… it must be a hundred times worse since she knows their thoughts.

I don't know how long I'm lost in my childhood memories or how long we're silent until Stefan finally says, "Elena says she's ready to try again, that she doesn't care what happens with Katherine… How can I not give her a chance after all of the times she's put her trust in me?"

Hearing the sadness in his voice, the worry, I put my hand on his shoulder and try a smile – I wish it was a better one, but I'm exhausted from Matt's every three hour feedings and honestly, I'm just not convinced… but I've said my piece and that's all I can do. Stefan isn't the kind of guy to fall to peer pressure or to be told what to do. He's heard my thoughts, my opinion, now it's up to him.

For his sake – and Allie and Grayson's – I sure hope Elena knows what she's doing.

-Damon-

I don't know what's on his mind, but I'm glad he's awake. Stefan is usually a sound sleeper – early to bed, early to rise kind of guy. I'm pulling a red-eye shift out of hwy346 and it's been atleast an hour since a car has passed. If it weren't for the game of Words with Friends that I'm playing with Bonnie and the text messages from Stefan, I guarantee you I'd be asleep.

I mean, I don't want to sound like a shitty excuse for a cop, but now that I'm not a vampire, there is zero danger in this town… and even fewer drivers down this under-used highway! It's pitch-black, 2:52am… nothing's going on and nothing is going to happen. I should sleep… I should kick the drivers seat back and get some shut-eye!

But I need this job.

I need this job and I want to be a decent something for once…

After taking a long swig of luke-warm coffee – more like oil from sitting for so long at that 24 hour truck stop – I laugh to myself as I submit my word on the scrabble-like game.

Adding B – E –W to a word Bonnie played earlier – itched.

BEWITCHED

Ha.

Stefan: Can you help on Wednesday?

Fucking hell.
One time Stefan helps me and immediately he's wanting the favor repaid – moving help at that!

Me: Where's your little bitch going to be?

Stefan: I'll ignore that… but he's not going to be back from Dallas until the weekend.

I actually laugh outloud at the fact that Stefan knew who his 'little bitch' was without me having to say his royal name – Niklaus Mikaelson, the douchebag of Virginia.

I've got out of Tuesday because of work, but Stefan knows Wednesday is my off-day… thankfully, I have the perfect excuse.

Katherine's pregnancy is considered high-risk. She wanted to be treated extra carefully, so she told the OB that she's had a few miscarriages in the past. The woman is a genious… we get the best appointments, weekly sonograms, and THE best physicians for the care and planning. Not to mention, and this is my favorite part, we won't have to wait until 20 weeks to find out the sex because of something called an amniocentesis.

It's a crazy fucking expensive test that tells a lot more than if you're having a boy or girl – but I have no worries since Katherine is as healthy as a horse, no matter how old she is (almost 600, don't tell her I told you. Ha!)

Me: Can't. Kat has a dr. appointment on Wed. Doing an amnio and I have to be there.

I get an alert that Bonnie played a word.

She used my E from BEWitched to spell FEISTY.

It could be my imagination or the very late hour in which she and I happen to meet up to play this game every time I work the overnight shift, but somehow we always end up playing a dirty-word version of Words with Friends. I'm not complaining! Not at all… especially after that incident the day we worked on the nursery. Still, I've got to remember what a psycho bitch Katherine is at all times… last thing I want is a girl fight between the two of them.

… well, that might be alright … ha!

Stefan: Amnio?

-Allie-

Baby Matt is very sweet. Mommy says all babies are sweet, but I think this one is the best I've ever met. Grayson was really cute, and kind of funny when he was this little. But Baby Matt really wants to smile. I guess he can't for the same reason why he can't talk yet – Mommy says he'll learn all of that in time just like Grayson did. Even though Matt can't make his mouth move like he wants it to and he can't hold out his hand and touch me like he wants… I can feel how happy he is and Aunt Caroline said I can put my pointer finger in his little fist. It's hot and kind of sweaty in there, but Matt is so sweet and little bitty and fun that I don't mind it at all!

I like listening to his baby thoughts and feeling what he feels, but Mommy and Daddy are talking and laughing and it's hard to concentrate on him because I like to watch them when they like each other. Mommy was very worried about Aunt Caroline being mad from their fight – the whole ride from Aunt Bonnie's she was saying out practice apologies in her head and seeing Daddy too. I guess she said those things because Aunt Caroline and Mommy aren't mad and they are happy and Mommy even held Matt until he got hungry.

"Come on, Allie." Daddy runs his hand down my hair and I smile up at him even though I don't want to go with them to the porch. I want to stay with Matt and I want him and Mommy to keep liking each other even after he tells Mommy about the doctor lady.

"It's okay, Stef," Aunt Caroline is about to give Matt milk from her boob like Mommy used to with Grayson and Daddy wants to get out of here. Daddy is so funny about boobs. He likes Mommy's boobs, but not Aunt Caroline's. "She can stay… you guys go talk."

Aunt Caroline knows about the doctor lady too, and she knows that Mommy is gonna cry probably, but mostly she wants me to talk to her about Matt. Aunt Caroline and Uncle Klaus know how I can hear things that no one else can… I like that they know. And Daddy knows too, but he still talks outloud to me.

"You sure?" Daddy asks, making a face at her with big eyes and his eyebrows raised up that Mommy can't see. "You don't want some privacy?"

"Are you kidding?" Aunt Caroline laughs, then starts to move her shirt out of the way – laughing even harder when Daddy turns around very very fast to look at the wall. "Go on, Stefan."

Just like I thought, Mommy and Daddy aren't outside very long before Aunt Caroline starts asking me about Matt. I can't tell her very much or answer many of her questions because Matt doesn't talk like we talk and he doesn't think like we think, but I tell her that he really loves her and me. And I tell her that he doesn't like the wet wipes to be cold and his favorite thing so far is voices.

Matt really likes my voice especially.

I like him too.

-Stefan-

I hold her for a long moment – enjoying Elena's body against mine and her head on my shoulder as we sway very lightly on the wooden porch swing. I have to tell her about my appointment to see Meredith and about Katherine's amniocentesis… the moment of truth is just a few days away.

I'm relieved to know that we can DNA test and find out for sure… but there is a part of me, a huge part of me, that wishes all of this would have come to light later. After a few weeks of this blissful reconciliation with Elena. I need more of these kinds of moments.

The silent ones with no space between us and our frequency moving warm and slow through my bones.

Elena looks up at me and smiles that sweet smile that I love so much, the one that wrinkles up her nose a little, "I was planning on telling you how handsome you are, but you look exhausted." She laughs, then uses her short fingernails to brush the hair above my ear back, her hand resting against my neck.

"Damon worked all night and I stayed up talking to him." I try to sound nonchalant, hoping to make this seem as nothing.

"All night?" She gasps, "About what?"

Okay. Here goes…

"Random things… but I was trying to drag him into helping when the furniture is delivered on Tuesday, but he's got to work."

I watch her fingers walk down the zipper of my hoodie – all the way to my belt buckle, then start back up.

"Dang it… and Jeremy's got to work."

"Yea," I bite my bottom lip instead of biting hers. I need to get through this, so I take her walking fingers in my free hand. "I asked about Wednesday too, but he and Katherine have to do an amniocentesis."

She sits up – straight as an arrow – and at first I think that I've already set her off with the mere mentioning of Katherine and the baby, but then I notice the worried look in her endless brown eyes and feel her fingers squeezing mine.

"Is something wrong?"

"No." I touch her face – her soft skin against the palm of my hand makes me want to hold her against me, feel all of her skin against all of mine. "I mean, I don't think so… it's just precautionary because of her 'age'." Relaxing, she turns into my hand, grazes her lips against my palm. "But, um, there is…" I stammer when I'm struggling for the right way to deliver bad news. She knows it. Her nuzzle against my hand stops cold that the releasing of my 'um'. "I did some research and the fluid that is removed to test can be used for a paternity test…"

I feel her smile against my hand before I see it, "Really?" I nod, confused by her happy reaction. "Ugh, the wondering is the worst part! If we just knew one way or the other we could start to plan. Start to get our heads around this, you know?"

"Yeah, I do." I know that feeling exactly, spot on. Being in this purgatory has been torturous.

"So when can you go and do the test? Katherine is okay with it? What did she say? Can they do on the same day? How long until we get the results?"

"Ah, well, Katherine doesn't know. I can't take the chance of telling her and her taking out some kind of revenge." Elena nods, understanding.

"So how are you going to get this all done in secret?" She asks, her brow furrowed as I imagine she is running through all of the options. "I mean, how in the world can you get your hands on the fluid if Katherine doesn't give consent?"

One last look at her kind expression, I run my fingers down the length of her hair, graze my thumb over the top of her wrist.

"Meredith Fell is going to help me."

***MORE TO COME***

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