Chapter Five

When he opens his eyes the next morning her side of the bed is already empty. He looks at the clock on the nightstand, which shows that it's already 9 a.m. He was still awake five hours ago, he couldn't fall asleep no matter how hard he tried. His mind was busy thinking about the events of the day, his talk with Miranda, her sister, then Diane. And his thoughts kept going back to the brown haired little boy.

He's made up his mind about the next step, the conversation he will have with Miranda about everything that happened. As much as he loves the thought of having a son, he cannot help being angry with the woman for keeping it a secret all this time. Maybe Diane is right, maybe if he had known he would have made a different decision. He doesn't think he could ever have been as happy with Miranda as he has been with Diane, but his son would have been there to brighten his days.

He already loves him as his own, even though he only saw him for a few minutes without knowing who he was. He will take the stupid test if Diane insists, but he knows in his heart that Kenny is his son and he can't wait to hold him in his arms.

But he cannot help feeling guilty for doing this to Diane. He knows he's hurt her deeply, but she could have taken the news much worse. He trusts that she'll be able to get used to the situation and won't stand between him and his son as she said she wouldn't. But he knows he has to make up for it somehow. It's his fault that their marriage is facing this obstacle and he doesn't blame Diane for needing time to adjust to the new circumstances.

He missed her closeness last night, but he wanted to give her space. He accepts that he's probably the last person she wants to see right now, but they are married now, they have to get through problems together. He considers himself lucky she still shared the bed with him, even though she pretended to be asleep by the time he was upstairs. But they managed to talk about it without a fight and as long as they keep talking they will always find a solution.

He isn't sure what to expect from Miranda, but he hopes for the best, that even though she's kept his son from him, she'll let him in his life, for Kenny's sake. All he wants is to be able to get to know him and see him regularly. He's willing to pay child support if she accepts and he respects her decision that she wants to raise him alone.

He finally gets out of bed and goes downstairs to check on Diane, but he doesn't find her anywhere. He searches for a note on the fridge, where they usually leave messages to each other, but there's none. He checks the coffee machine, but it hasn't been used today. The sound of paws on the floorboards reminds him that he's not completely alone and the barking that follows is a sign that someone else has been forgotten about that morning as well.

He knows he has to be the one taking Justice out on a walk again that morning, but he needs to wake up first. He puts on some coffee, wondering about where Diane could have left so early on a Saturday morning, but he gives up after a while. He knows she will be back eventually. He has to be patient with her now, not to push her if he wants them to stay on good terms.

While waiting for the coffee he finds the piece of paper with the phone number, determined to make that call within the next half an hour and take the first step to bring his son into his life.

o-o-o

Miranda was surprised to get his call, even more so when he asked her to meet with him that day. He didn't name the reason, he wanted them to discuss everything in person, not giving her a chance to hang up on him. He suggested a coffee on her side of town, knowing she probably wouldn't want to get away from their son for too long and he guessed she wouldn't bring him with her to meet him, even though he secretly wished for it nevertheless.

But as suspected, Miranda arrives alone and Kurt can see the confusion on her face as she sits down next to him.

"Would you like a coffee?"

"No, thank you, just tell me why are we here."

From her reaction Kurt guesses that her sister kept her word and didn't tell her anything, so he has to be the one telling her about their conversation. He can already imagine the fight between the sisters that might follow, but it won't keep him from going further. Tanya knowingly took the risk of her sister getting angry with her and he's actually grateful for her.

"I talked to your sister yesterday and she told me that Kenny is my son."

"What?"

The shocking expression on Miranda's face is similar to the one Diane had the previous day.

"She told me everything, that by the time you realized you were pregnant I was engaged and you didn't want to stand between us," he tries to catch some kind of a reaction to the things he says on her face, but she keeps the shocked expression on and doesn't seem willing to reply to anything, so he continues, "I really wish you had told me last year, we could have worked something out from the beginning, but I respect your decision and that you did it for me, but now that I know, I'd like to be a part of my son's life."

He stops and keeps looking at her, she will have to answer something sooner or later. He starts to fear that answer, because she is still looking at him the same way, until she finally opens her mouth to talk.

"I don't know what Tanya told you, but you and I were never exclusive and you're not Kenny's father."