A/N Here is my final chapter. I hope you enjoy it.
Thank you for all the reviews, favourites and follows. I very much appreciate it xx
Now is the Time
Chapter 6
The maître d' takes her coat, passing it to another member of staff, "follow me please". Nervously and with her eyes downcast, she follows him. As they approach the table she sees movement, someone stands and she knows without looking that it's Red.
"Hello Lizzie" he says in his usual warm and welcoming tone. His hand touches her elbow as he leans in and kisses her on the cheek. Lizzie doesn't respond. She is only a little surprised but she's also slightly overwhelmed and those things combined are keeping her silent. She just watches him as he pulls out her seat, waiting until she's settled before taking his again.
He's missed her, the sight of her, and the warmth of her skin. It is all he can do to sit, resisting the very strong temptation to touch her more, to kiss her, to show her how he feels.
When she meets his eye he smiles at her, she wants to ask him why he's here. Wants to be tough on him, to demand honest answers to difficult questions, finally something she can know and trust, but she doesn't know how to form the words or where to begin. Maybe there is no truth to reveal, no story for Red to tell.
The waiter arrives with menus, and Red orders champagne. He's either glad to see her or he's determined to maintain his usual high standards. When he speaks she watches his lips, of all the things she remembered about him this was the detail that she couldn't get out of her head. Not just watching the way his lips moved but remembering the feel of them against her own. She sometimes thinks that that is the truth Donald told her to seek. Words can have a double meaning, hold the darkest untruths, but it's harder to be dishonest with such naked emotions.
"You look beautiful Lizzie. I haven't seen that dress before." Red says, as charming as ever.
"The spoils of my father's colourful career" she says, meeting his eye in challenge. She bought the dress with her own money but he doesn't need to know that.
"You're keeping the money?" Red asks.
"No. But it seems my father had some legitimate businesses and I suspect I'm about to find myself out of a job, I might need something to tide me over." she says, and this is the crux of the matter. Necessity might dictate her actions when every instinct makes her want to be done with it all. Despite everything she once again finds herself telling Raymond Reddington the truth. What is it about the man?
"Why do you think Harold will fire you?" He asks.
"Well my father was a high profile criminal, a fact I had some knowledge of but chose not to disclose. Despite my extensive training as a profiler I was taken in by another high profile criminal hell bent on vengeance, who used me and the FBI to do his bidding. But mostly they need a scapegoat and I'm too tired to deflect their attention onto anyone else" she explains.
"I am truly sorry, I know your job meant a great deal to you. I realise what I put you through was deeply distressing and I don't know if I'll ever be able to make it up to you, but know that I hope to try" Red explains.
"The cost of doing business" she says, her voice full of contempt, though truthfully with him here, she doesn't feel that way.
"No Lizzie" he says, his tone flat, his eyes hard and fixed on her. "Though I was prepared to die to get the revenge I wanted I would never have allowed anyone to hurt you. I knew from the moment I met you that I'd sent myself on a fool's errand. In the end I wanted you with me so he knew that I wasn't prepared to do to him what he'd done to me" He stops, takes a breath before continuing, "But you never asked me, when you came to me, you never once asked if it was true. Was there no doubt?"
She feels such confusion, her thought and her very memories on shaky ground. This could be yet more lies? But for what purpose? What is his play? Then thinking of his words she considers that she didn't ask him outright, that she never challenged him to explain or questioned his intentions.
Her brain is muddled; these thoughts are all too complicated for her already busy mind, so she doesn't respond. Instead she drinks her champagne and enjoys the lunch that she promised herself. She even enjoys the proximity and company of a man she once believe loved her and once believed was about to kill her. Life is a complicated business.
Red and Lizzie continue their lunch. Business dealings, experience and more than a few sticky situations mean Red has the ability to keep the conversation flowing. He asks her about her trip to New York, the meetings she's had and still to have with the lawyers and the sights she plans to visit.
He recommends a tiny hole in the wall noodle shop way down town, before long he's waxing lyrical about the Gyoza dumplings, and he is rewarded by a warm nostalgic smile from Lizzie, before she drops her head and her cheeks are engulfed in a hot blush. Listening to him talking reminds her of old times, moments between them that prove to be happy and genuine memories. "I'll try it" she tells him.
"How long are you staying in the city?" He asks her.
"A few days, a week maybe. As long as it takes, maybe longer" she tells him with a shrug of her shoulders, not committing to a future that's still so uncertain.
"Let me take you to dinner tomorrow night" he says, watching her reactions carefully.
She stills, wondering not for the first time about his motivation. What can he possibly gain from asking her to dinner? And if he has nothing to gain, what game is he playing? Her thoughts are interrupted by the waiter arriving with their meal.
Red compliments her on the choice of restaurant and the rest of the meal continues in comfortable conversation. He doesn't mention dinner again, which is a relief because she doesn't know what to say.
When the bill comes she makes to reach for it, determined to pay her share but he scoops it up and hands it over before she can even find her purse. She starts to protest, expecting him to make some quip about being a gentleman but when she looks into his eyes her breath catches. His expression is soft, warm and tender and she can't think why she wanted to argue with him or any words to say. Everything but the way he looks at her is inconsequential.
Red offers her a lift back to her hotel which she graciously accepts, wanting just a little more time in his company. With Dembe driving they head through the streets of the city, everything about the journey reminding her of countless trips they've made before.
When they pull up he gets out to open her door and escorts her into the lobby of her hotel. She's a little embarrassed, wishing she'd splashed out a bit more. This is a man who turns his nose up at the Sheraton. He must be horrified.
"Where are you staying?" she asks him, more to distract herself than anything.
He smiles at her, tilts his head in that very Raymond Reddington playful way. "You're the profiler, you tell me" he says.
Lizzie lifts her eyebrow in lieu of an eye roll. "You know how many hotels there are in New York? I'm a profiler, not a psychic."
"But you know me Lizzie. You know what I like, the comforts I enjoy. I'd bet you already know in your head and you're just being coy" Red smirks.
"If I had to guess I'd say The Carlyle, or something of that ilk" she says in an exasperated tone, trying to cover the humour in her voice.
Red just smiles back at her, looking delighted at her and their little game.
But a frown crosses Lizzie's face, concern for him suddenly replacing every other emotion she was feeling, "they're looking for you, hunting you Red".
"I know sweetheart but remember I spent 20 years evading them and believe me it was not a particularly trying task, just ask Donald." he says stepping closer and offering her a reassuring smile.
He lets out a shaky breath, nodding at the truth of his words.
Red steps closer still, lifts a hand and gently cups her jaw. He leans in and delicately kisses her on the mouth. He doesn't attempt to linger, doesn't push to take more that she is willing to give but he savours the moment, the feel of her smooth skin, and the warmth of her soft lips.
He steps back and gives her a moment to gather herself and then he says, "You asked me if anyone had ever loved you. What I wanted to tell you that night and every moment since is that you are loved and you always will be."
Lizzie hears the words he speaks and his genuine tone, her breathing more ragged now and moisture gathering in her eyes that she tries to blink back. "Thank you" she says when she's certain she can get the words out.
He delicately brushes her cheek with his thumb the slowly withdraws. She watches him leave, watches as he gets in the car and as the car pulls away. She wonders if she'll ever see Raymond Reddington again or if this was their goodbye and that their goodbye kiss. He came so unexpectedly into her life; it would be just like him to melt away.
Standing in the lobby, looking out into the street at a person and a car that are no longer there she measures the time it took to trust him against the time it took to lose that trust. She swallows hard, thinking she did him an injustice but that it was not completely without cause.
The next day she has meetings back to back. Her father's lawyer is pleasant enough, but years of doing business in the shadowy side of society has given him the belief that his opinions carry weight, and he looks on Elizabeth as a young, foolish and possibly naive girl. He is indignant about her plan to give her inheritance to charity, freely offering his opinion where it's not needed and not wanted. It seems he knew her father well and while he had no in-depth knowledge about his criminality, he respected the man enough to see her actions as a slight upon his memory.
Lizzie doesn't want to be high handed, doesn't want to just tell him to mind his own business and do the job that he's being paid to do so it turns into a battle of wills. They argue repeatedly around the issue while he parades in associates, financial advisors and anyone he can think of in order to change her mind.
The more he argues the more entrenched she becomes. She'd told Red she might find herself in need of the money that her father had legitimately amassed but the more she defends her position the more hateful the idea becomes. Everything about who she tells her that she'll never be happy keeping it.
Finally she reaches breaking point. She tries to sound as calm as she can and says, "I've made my decision. I've explained it to you a thousand times. I want nothing from him. Not a penny. Not one single penny. The cash can go immediately, the other assets liquidated and the money donated once you've taken your cut".
The lawyer is all red faced, astounded that she's still intent on going against his good advice. "Not comfortable with the money your father gifted you but comfortable enough in the company of Raymond Reddington" he spits out.
Lizzie feels like she's been slapped. It silences her for a few moments, while she reels from the implied insult. She can feel her anger mounting and she's determined to be done with him before he has the satisfaction of seeing the effect he's had on her.
"While you may have known my father, don't presume to know me. I want the papers drawn up and couriered to me. I'll make any changes I require, sign and return them to you. I have no wish to see you again or to discuss this matter further." As she says this she stands and moves to the door. She turns to him, nods her goodbye and makes her way out to the elevator.
At the kerb Red is leaning on the car, his fedora shielding his eyes from the sun, guaranteeing him a perfect view of Lizzie when she exits the building.
He hasn't been waiting long, his knowledge of the lawyer and his reputation for verbosity helping to time his arrival.
Each second that passes Lizzie feels her fury grow exponentially. By the time she exits the building and makes her way through the courtyard toward the street she has to brush angry tears away.
Her vision is blurry so she's not aware yet that Red can see her, or that he's making his way towards her, an expression of concern darkening his features. She takes another swipe at the tears then lifts her eyes and that's when she sees him, quickly closing the gap between them, removing his hat.
When he reaches her he envelopes her in a tight embrace. "Lizzie?" He says, a question in his tone. But she is too overwhelmed to speak. She wasn't even sure she'd see him again yet here he is, just when she needs him. Her breathing is ragged as she continues the battle to suppress the anger she feels. Slowly she starts to calm, taking a deep, more even breath.
"Sweetheart, just tell me who's ass I need to kick" he says, half serious, half in jest. But it's enough to help her shake the rest of the tension she feels and she smiles despite everything that's happened.
"I'm sorry" she says against his shoulder.
"Do you want to tell me what happened?" Red asks her but she just shakes her head. If she tells him that the lawyer used his name against her, to goad her, she's afraid he might just make good on his ass kicking threat.
She moves to step back and he releases her from his grasp. "I'm sorry." She says again, shaking her head. "What are you doing here?"
"I'm here for you. Dinner, remember?" Red replies.
Lizzie just stands, the departure of the anger making her feel empty and lost, "I don't know what I'm doing Red. Please just tell me what to do because I've had enough of this stumbling about in the dark" Lizzie says looking downcast.
"First you're going to accept my offer of help. My people can deal with this" he says lifting his hat and using it to indicate the lawyer's office behind them, "so you don't have to worry about it again. Then you're going to take me up on my offer of dinner".
She looks off to the side, her eyes dropping to the ground as she battles inwardly about accepting what he has to offer, accepting everything he has to offer.
"I need to be able to trust you" she says.
"You can, and given enough time you will" he says.
"What do you want?" She asks him straight out.
"I want my second chance." He says meeting her eyes.
"I don't know what that is or what it means" she tells him.
"I want you Lizzie. I want you to trust me again. I want the things that you want; a life with someone, a family. I know you loved me once and I hope you can again because I love you, with every fibre of my being, and I'm not going to be able to leave you, even if you ask me to" he says taking her hand and lifting it to his lips.
"Red" she says, her voice thick with emotion. "I've got nothing; no family, no money, no job. I need this to be real".
"It is real and you have me. I'd tell you how I want this to play out but I don't want to overwhelm you. What I will tell you is that tonight, while we're at dinner, you're having an accommodation upgrade."
She laughs, "I knew it would be killing you".
"You know me; everything worth knowing and everything not." Red tells her smiling.
"I can't think of a single thing about you that isn't worth knowing" Lizzie responds.