There was much disagreement about me becoming Hector's successor as leader of the Trojan army, but only through sheer desperation and the image of me fighting against my husband so 'valiantly', as well as the condition that I was not allowed on the battlefield, was I able to take command.
I enlisted Hector's right-hand men to carry out orders and help plan strategy. Due to the fear of morale dropping if the soldiers discovered they took orders from a woman, I asked one of Hector's favourite warriors and friend, Alexandros, to pretend to be in command of the army. I did not let Troy have another battle for a month because of the lack of weapons and because young reinforcements were arriving from the countryside. In that time, however, I worked on getting Alexandros to teach the soldiers new fighting techniques and tactics.
Priam had left one night to see Achilles and retrieve Hector's body, and returned unharmed with it. When Priam came back, he came into my bedchamber.
"Oh, my dear, he misses you," he said, and then walked out.
After Hector's funeral, I could only think about war strategy. The Greeks could not attack us during this time, for without a battle or a way inside the city, they were left to stew on the beach. The night before my planned battle, I wondered about Achilles, and if he would fight or not. His anger and pride would force him to, and I was scared for my soldiers facing him in such a state.
"Alexandros," I said, joining him before the soldiers arrived for battle the next morning. "I want it made clear to the men to avoid Achilles entirely and to engage the Myrmidons only when necessary. We need men coming home alive today. Other than that, just remember the plans."
"Yes, my lady," he replied, giving a nod of agreement. "I only wish Hector could see you now, as a leader."
"Thank-you, Alexandros," I said, and then noticed the soldiers arriving. "I must go. Make Hades wait for your soul."
The Greek army arrived with Agamemnon riding his chariot out in front with King Odysseus, and with Achilles and his Myrmidons following in theirs close behind. I watched from the top of the wall as Alexandros prepared the soldiers, and before I knew it, it had begun. In my mind, I panicked about the soldiers remembering what they had been taught this last month, but it all went according to plan. While the battle was being fought, there was also a visible circle with only a few Greek soldiers in it and no Trojan engaging them. When these soldiers tried to come near a Trojan, the circle became wider. I smiled in the knowledge that Achilles was of no use to the Greek army today. As I smiled, however, I could just make out his head tilting to look up at me, and suddenly, my smile faded. He continued to look up at me for quite some time before gathering his Myrmidons and heading back to the Greek camp in their chariots.
Knowing I was going to be victorious in this battle, I permitted myself to laugh.
The Greeks retreated with less than three-quarters of their army, whilst my army remained relatively intact. While the soldiers celebrated Alexandros, Alexandros and the rest of the Counsel celebrated me. Knowing that the Greeks would catch on to my strategy, I devised that the soldiers undergo more training to prepare them for whatever the Greek commanders would concoct. One battle every new moon would mean that the Greeks would always be one step behind us, and that their morale would drop, as well as my Trojans gaining more strength and training.
Five months passed, and so did five bloody battles. My stomach grew bigger, and though he had missed the first three battles, Achilles was now tearing into every soldier that came across him. Although my men tried to avoid him, he had hunted them down; every next kill became more aggressive and torturous for me to watch. I understood that Achilles was showing what his love for me was doing to him, as well as his frustration at not being able to see me, by killing. He had no other place to show his emotion freely except the battlefield, and for that I pitied him. I took solace in the knowledge that, even though Troy was losing men, Greece always lost more.
My plans made a Trojan victory seem closer than ever before—I had even thought the war would be over before my child was born—but everything changed on the eve of our next battle. I saw ships leave the horizon from my balcony, but where they were headed was concealed under the dark sky, and eventually it became too dark to see anything else. As I lay my hand over my stomach, I never before had felt such worry…not only for Troy, my unborn child and myself, but for Achilles, too.