New chapter. I've got a cold, I've got exams and I'm incredibly tired so I'll make things short: unbetaed, full of mistakes, like usual.

Enjoy and leave reviews!

Chapter 14

Of Snow and Rain

It was snowing on Konoha village. Not fat, fluffy snowflakes that we're used to see in movies, but tiny scattered ones getting easily scattered away by the cool breeze. Not the kind of snow that would last, alas - from the look of it, snow would turn into rain before midday. Iruka always had that strange, petty ability to predict weather. It was not a very helpful ability anyway for someone who didn't go on field missions often. He would have preferred to be a natural genius like Shikamaru or Kakashi... but given how both of them turned out, maybe he was better off with telling the weather, honestly.

The chuunin was glad the New Year was over, because now that all the fuss about NYE was over, things were back to normal - that is to say, as normal as things can be when you are the number one marriageable man in a small town, but still. At least now he could leave his apartment and walk in the streets again. Not that he had missed it much with that cold weather and all those annoying people bugging him, but he wasn't going to stay barricaded in his house forever - no matter how tempting it was when women eyed him out creepily like that. What did they all have to stare at him like that, he was only doing his grocery goddammit! The academy teacher sighed. He was already missing the time when Naruto did it for him while he stayed home... But it couldn't be healthy to stay confined home all the time: he needed fresh air. And besides, he couldn't keep on neglecting his training; he hadn't trained seriously in over a week and that wouldn't do if he wanted to stay in good shape. It was not because he was not doing a lot of field missions that he could let himself go soft - he still had thirty or so ninja wannabes to look after five days a week and that was worth a B-ranked mission anytime.

Maybe he could train a bit in the afternoon once it stopped raining - it would be messy, but he wasn't afraid of getting dirty. He had already handed in his mission report, all that was left to do was to buy some meat for the diner, pay for his grocery and then he could head back home -

"Good morning Iruka-sensei!" the fish saler, a jovial middle-aged woman, greeted him, effectively distracting him from his inner musings.

"Good morning Watachi-san," Iruka answered back with a strained smile, tired to be friendly to everyone who wanted to get his attention.

"What are you having today sensei?"

"Hum..." Iruka checked out the fish stall and saw a fresh-looking sole, "I think I'll take that sole please."

"The sole? Good choice sensei, good choice," the woman winked at him proudly and started to wrap the said fish for the chuunin. "My daughter loves sole too, you know."

"Is that so?" Iruka smiled weakly, knowing only too well where that discussion would lead. He should really avoid approaching middle-aged women if he could help it - they were by far the worse to get rid of. And they tended to get offended easily too...

"She's a lovely girl, you should really meet her, I'm sure you'd love her-"

"I appreciate the offer, but-"

"Her name's Fuyuko, you might already have met her; she works part-time at the drugstore near your apartment!"

Iruka mentally twitched at the thought that the whole village seemed to know where he lived. "Really?"

"Maybe I could arrange a meeting for you!"

"Oh, that's nice of you, really, but you see I'm not looking for someone right now..."

"You mean you found someone already?" the woman barked, looking both shocked and vexed by the sudden revelation.

"What? Oh, no! No, that's not what I meant!" Iruka denied hastily, cautious not to anger the bossy saleswoman.

"Then you're gonna meet her?"

"Err-"

"You have so many things in common! I'm sure you'd get along well!" Watachi-san pressed on louder, ignoring Iruka's refusal.

"Well, you see-"

"She's so kind and patient and smart - and lovely with children, lovely!"

"How much do I owe you?" Iruka asked weakly, getting a bit desperate to pay his fish and get out of there as soon as possible.

"And she's a wonderful cook too! You'd make a sweet couple, I'm telling you-!"

"AH! Now that's a real laugh!" a random customer suddenly cut in, "Your daughter, dating the good Iruka-sensei?" An alarm bell rang inside Iruka's head - he had a distinct feeling that things would soon go downward...

"Perfectly well!" the saleswoman replied irritably, her huge chest swelling with pride.

"You mean that lazy, good-for-nothing? That blockhead girl who had to take the chuunin exam 4 times before being admitted in? Iruka-sensei deserves better than that!" the mousey-haired customer said powerfully and Iruka gaped, appalled. He couldn't believe he was witnessing this.

"Don't you dare speak evil of my daughter!" Watachi-san hissed dangerously, "Not good enough for Iruka-sensei? Then maybe your fat pig of a daughter would suit him better, huh? I'm afraid Iruka-sensei has better taste in women than that!"

"Now, now, ladies..." Iruka tried weakly to pacify things, eyeing uneasily the small crowd the argument had attracted. But the two women seemed to have long forgotten him, as if it all didn't even concern him.

"Well I'm sorry, but I didn't know Iruka-sensei to be one to favour looks over intelligence," the woman spat back venomously, "Mina might not be a top-model, but she definitely has brains, unlike that slutty little idiot of yours!"

"What?"

"Look at yourselves, making such a pathetic show," a nearby fruit seller cut in loudly, disdain dripping from her voice. "I don't see how Iruka-sensei could be interested in any girl whose mother have such rude manners. At least my daughter-"

"Your daughter? Your daughter?" Watachi-san bit back, "Well let me tell you one thing about your daughter! If she was stupid enough to go out with a sand nin and fall pregnant, it's her damn problem! But to try to seduce Iruka-sensei into marrying her to save the appearances-!"

The woman blanched. "H-how can you say such - such horrible lies?"

"Oh, come on," the mousey-haired customer replied with irritation, "It's all over the town, there's no point trying to hide it!"

"And everybody saw her too making a fool of herself in front of the good sensei, faking to have sprained her ankle...! To use Iruka-sensei's kindness against him like that to save the appearances, it makes me sick!"

"You're talking like you didn't push your own daughter to go out with him because your business's going bankrupt and you need money!" the fruit merchant barked angrily, pointing the chubby woman with her skinny finger.

"How dare you - you! - you bitch!" the saleswomen shouted, swinging Iruka's half-wrapped fish over her head to slam it into her interlocutor's face, but accidentally hitting the customer she had been arguing with previously. The said woman squealed with surprise before letting a small outraged cry and launching herself on the saleswomen, aiming for the hair. During that time, the fruit seller started throwing oranges and apples at the two with the precision of a five year-old, hitting accidentally a few spectators. Iruka dodged an apple and decided that the merchant could keep her fish - the diner could be damned, he was getting out of there.

The chuunin made his way through the small crowd the argument had created and rapidly headed for the market place's exit, trying his best to go unnoticed. He'd had enough social exposure for the day, thank you very much. To think those women actually fought over him - and in the middle of the crowded market place moreover! This was crazy! The New Year Eve party organizers and now this! Was the whole village turning insane or what? He was only an average-looking, low-ranked and quite ordinary single man for God's sake, not some handsome multi-millionaire genius or something! It was going too far... Really too far.

...He'd have to start henging himself into someone else when he went out.

It was not an idea the chuunin was very fond of - using henges to avoid suitors and their tenacious mothers, it seemed... a bit much. He kept on telling his students not to waste chakra pointlessly and to use ninjutsu only when it was absolutely necessary, but now he was considering henging himself to do his grocery because he wanted to avoid being asked out. What a wonderful example he was setting for his students...! But he guessed that he didn't have the choice anymore. Not with what just happened... No, not with people starting to fight over him like that. Things had gone far enough already, he wouldn't let the situation worsen. If he stopped making public appearances, things were ought to cool down, right? Right.

At that moment, the brown-haired man promised himself that if the situation didn't improve within another week, he'd ask for a long-term mission very far away and wouldn't come back before a few months, students or not.

The chuunin sighed with relief when he walked out of the market place, glad nobody else had tried to convince him to accept a date. Unfortunately, his relief was rapidly forgotten when he felt small raindrops hit his face; it appeared that while he had been doing his grocery, snow had turned into rain. Iruka inwardly groaned; he had known it would rain, but if he had known it would start raining so early he would have brought an umbrella with him... Damn. He was going to get wet. But on the brighter side, there wouldn't be many people lingering in the streets, which meant that there would be less people annoying him.

It was almost worth getting wet.

Sighing in resignation, Iruka walked with a rapid pace, wondering what he was going to make for diner... Mhhh, maybe he could cook the chicken he had planned to serve for lunch tomorrow. But no, he didn't want to change his plans for the week just because their dinner was currently being used as a weapon by three very perturbed - and perturbing - women. Maybe he could just make a vegetarian meal and serve vegetables with rice or noodles. Or a soup, maybe. It's been a while since the last time he'd make a soup...

Iruka was half-way home when something distracted him from his musings about his weekly dinner planning. In front of him, a lonely wet cardboard box stood in the street. Iruka approached the brown box slowly, wondering who would leave a box like that in the middle of the street - from the look of it, it was probably a trick or a joke made by Konoharu and his little gang. It was their style to use a simple box and put something really disgusting or perverse inside in a residential area just for the fun of it. Iruka wondered when they would grow out of it... Cautiously, the chuunin peered inside the box, expecting to find... well, anything really, coming from those you never knew. But to say that he hadn't been expecting what was inside of the box was an understatement.

Inside of the damp cardboard box there were two tiny, barely breathing kittens.

Iruka stared at the two small balls of damp fur, feeling mildly shocked and angry at whoever had been heartless enough to leave those out in the middle of the street. In January, moreover! Those poor kittens -from the look of it, they were barely three-week old- were out to freeze to death in that weather - especially under the chilly rain like that. They could have at least brought them to a nearby petshop or something! Iruka really couldn't believe how cruel and careless people could be.

The chuunin shivered; he was starting to get soaked, and it wouldn't do to stand in the rain like that for too long or he would catch a cold. Looking around, Iruka hesitated. He just couldn't leave the kittens in the middle of the street like that, but he couldn't exactly take them to the petshop right then - it was located at the other side of town and he'd probably catch a pneumonia before he reached it. And besides he had to drop his grocery home before doing anything else. But he couldn't, he wouldn't abandon them out in the rain like that. Of course not. He'd drop his grocery home, check on Kakashi, put on dry clothes and come back for them with his umbrella and bring them to the petshop. Iruka sighed wearily at the thought; sometimes he wondered if it truly paid off in the end to be a good guy. Because so far it hadn't done him any good...

Iruka put down his grocery bags and took the box in his hands, moving it to the side of the road, where it was at least sheltered from the rain - not that it changed anything, since the kittens were already soaked to the bone, but it was better than just leaving them freeze to death in the middle of the road. Then, brown-haired man grabbed his bags and turned around to head home, but somehow he couldn't help but glance at the box one last time before leaving. The two wet kittens lying motionlessly at the bottom of their damp cardboard box were truly a sad and pathetic sight. Now that he remembered, they had barely moved when he lifted the box too. The poor things were probably suffering of hypothermia. No wonder, with that chilly rain... The chuunin felt suddenly awfully guilty for letting them out in the cold, even if it was only for fifteen minutes. They might be dead when he'd come back for them in fifteen minutes, for all he knew...

...

Ah, damn. Next time he saw the Hokage, he was definitely asking her if it was possible to remove with surgery this annoying "good guy" part. With a half-amused, half-bitter snort, he wondered what kind of reaction the village's leader would have.

"Well... What are you going to do from now on?"

"I don't know... I guess I'll find my own path someday."

"Are you sure about this? Maybe you should give it a second thought."

"I know. We had so many beautiful moments here... Those walls are full of them. But all those happy memories belong to the past. I know deep down somewhere that I'll never be able to let go if I stay here, dwelling on the past."

Kakashi sighed loudly, bored out of his mind. He watched Justin hammering in a big red "For sale" poster in front of his house with total disinterest, wondering when the damn movie would end - he didn't know for how long the thing had been playing, but it seemed like an eternity for the Copy nin. The movie was by far the most boring and depressing one he had ever seen - and that was saying something, since the ones Iruka had been forcing him to watch ever since he came home with that evil DVD thing were atrociously dull. If at least they were just boring... but no, those movies were sad, incoherent, incredibly complicated and boring. There was no action, no plot against other characters and no scandals; people kept on talking, saying all kind of incoherent and complex stuff about feelings and relationships. And when they were not talking, they were just standing there in silence or gazing at something afar, just like Justin was doing at that precise moment.

Although he didn't want to admit it, Kakashi often had difficulties understanding what was truly going on in those, which was frustrating since he was Genius Sharigan Hatake Kakashi and Genius Sharigan Hatake Kakashi did NOT like to not understand things. This kind of situation made him feel angry at the damn stupid movie for being so pointlessly complex and angry at himself for not understanding the damn thing.

What was the point of being a genius anyway if he couldn't even figure out a mere movie, for God's sake?

He had to admit that watching movies, no matter how dull and frustrating they were, was better than staring at the ceiling all day long. But he still didn't understand why he couldn't have back his soap opera instead of those. He had asked Iruka several times, but the man kept on insisting that that watching 'trash like those shallow and sappy soap operas' was bad for him. Damn stubborn chuunin. Kakashi had no idea why he hated soap operas so much...

Fine if Iruka-sensei didn't want him to watch soap operas; he could deal with it. But he could at least pick up good movies! The ones he kept on borrowing at the local video store were simply dreadful. Of course, the silver-haired man hadn't dared to speak his mind out about that point. What if the chuunin intentionally chose the worst movies he could think of just for the pleasure of torturing him? If it was the case, then he was better off avoiding the subject altogether. But that theory didn't make much sense, because if Iruka had truly wanted to make him miserable, he could have simply left him staring at the ceiling all day long. That would have done it. But instead the academy teacher chose to have him seeing those movies. So the only other logical explanation for Iruka's horrible choice of movies was that he actually liked those. But then again, what kind of person would want to spend his or her free time watching something that requested such a high level of mental concentration just for the fun of it? Getting all confused or crying over a mere fiction? He didn't know for Iruka, but that was definitely not his definition of leisure.

... Not that he had actually cried when Sarah had helped her invalid mother to suicide. Of course not. His eyes might have gotten a bit wet - but he hadn't cried - Anyway, that was beside the point; the fact was that it was not fun to feel like crap because of a stupid movie. He had felt like crap enough like that in his life...

That was what leisure was about. Forgetting about how your life sucked and how crappy you felt, even if it's just for a short while. Forgetting about your pain, your sorrow, your guilt... Not because you wanted to forget about them, but simply because you knew that if you kept thinking about them all the time it would affect your mental sanity. That was what leisure was about. Not about watching movies making you feel crappy for the fun of it. One really had to be a masochist to watch angsty movies such as those in their free time and actually like it.

The silver-haired man sometimes wanted to complain about Iruka's choice of movies, but the man had made it pretty clear that he didn't have much choice: it was his movies, or the ceiling. Which explained why he was currently watching Justin staring at his and his ex-girlfriend house.

... Kakashi didn't understand why they guy was making such a deal about it; his girlfriend didn't like him anymore, so what? He just had to leave her and get a new one. See? No big deal.

He could understand the part about selling the house, though. When his father had died... he had tried to stay in the Hatake mansion, but after a while he just couldn't stand it anymore. Every time he came back home, he felt like living that day again... So he sold it in the end. But he guessed that it wasn't the same thing; after all, Justin hadn't come home to find his girlfriend lying in a pool of blood...

He'd have to talk to Iruka about this. Those movies couldn't be good for him if they reminded him of it... Because it was one thing to feel bad about things you've done wrong, but it was another to feel bad about things you had no control upon. The latter was unhealthy. Maybe he could politely suggest his caretaker to choose less depressing and angsty movies...

As Justin was finishing packing away his clothes, Iruka came in. Kakashi heard him put down the grocery noisily in the kitchen and expected the chuunin to walk to the guest room an poke his head through the doorway to ask him if he needed anything, like he always did. Kakashi was surprised however when the chuunin didn't stop by and went straight to the bathroom without even glancing his way.

How unusual.

After a while, the sound of the shower spray reached his ears and Kakashi could only guess that the academy teacher had had a sudden urge to shower. It was intriguing him, but the jounin guessed that Iruka's body hygiene wasn't his business. Gazing back at the small television, Kakashi tried not to focus too much on the distant sound of the shower and focus on the movie, which soon proved to be a lost cause.

For what seemed to him like hours, the apartment remained silent except for the sound of the shower and of the credits playing in background, the movie having ended at some point during the chuunin's shower. Sighing, Kakashi listened to the music with boredom, suddenly feeling tired for some reason. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that the movie had been particularly boring, or maybe it was just because the sound of the music soothed him, but his eyelids seemed to become increasingly heavier... Yawning, Kakashi guessed it wouldn't matter much if he closed them for a short while...

"Uh, Kakashi-sensei...?"

The sound of Iruka's voice shook the sleepy jounin awake brutally, leaving him a little confused. It took him moment to gain back some focus on reality and realize the chuunin was standing in front of him and, moreover, that he was talking to him. His still a bit foggy mind then registered that there was something wrong with Iruka. Something in the tone of his voice, which had been hesitant and mildly sheepish, was wrong. And so was the look on his face, which was one of embarrassment and helplessness, emotions the elite jounin had rarely seen on the man's tanned face, let alone directed at him. That was when Kakashi's brain caught on and he realized that those were not the most out-of-place things about the man standing in front of him.

"Iruka-sensei, are those kittens?" he asked, incredulous.

The brown-haired man sighed. "I found them on my way home - someone had left them out in the rain, they were freezing out..." The chuunin trailed on hesitantly, looking at the two kittens resting in his muscled arms. Kakashi understood with that uneasy silence that the man had no idea what to do of them now. The sight of the academy teacher worrying over stray kittens was, in a way, endearing and somehow Kakashi couldn't suppress a small smile.

"Let me give them a look," he offered, "I'm used to taking care of animals."

At those words, Iruka looked mildly relieved and he sat down beside the jounin, bending forward carefully to show him the two still damp kittens. The black one stirred a bit when moved while the other one remained still, which seemed to worry the chuunin.

"They're really young - probably aren't even weaned yet. You said they were under the rain?"

"Yes," the chuunin explained quietly, "They were doing hypothermia, so I brought them home and washed them with hot water to warm them up, but the smaller one seems still frozen..."

"Yeah," Kakashi said thoughtfully. Then, he felt frustration stir in him. If at least he could move his body, he would be able to grab the kitten and feel it in his hands; he'd have a better idea of how it was. How he hated his current situation... "Put them under the cover with me; my body warmth will warm them up."

"Right," the chuunin nodded gravely, grabbing the kittens so cautiously Kakashi thought he was afraid of breaking them and putting them on the silver-haired man's lap, making sure that their little faces were not too much under the blankets so they could breathe freely.

"There, it should be alright," the Copy nin said, "now let's just let them warm up and they should be feeling better by the end of the afternoon. They'll probably be hungry by then too. You'll need to hand-feed them."

"I don't intend to keep them, I just took them home because they probably wouldn't have lasted the walk to the petshop," Iruka admitted a bit sheepishly, cracking a small sorry smile as he stared at the two little kittens poking their heads out of the covers. For some reason, Kakashi felt like he was watching something he wasn't meant to see as Iruka's features softened and he looked away, feeling uneasy.

The silence stretched between the two men, like it always did when they didn't know what to say to each other anymore, and Kakashi knew that Iruka would soon get up and leave, like he always did in those kind of awkward situations. And he'd be left alone, with only the sound of Iruka's footsteps to distract him from his loneliness. Once again.

Kakashi didn't know why, but somehow he didn't want the brown-haired man to leave this time. No, not just yet. If only the teacher could stay just a little longer... He knew it was childish of him to wish for such a thing, because the chuunin was ought to leave him sooner or later, but... somehow the man's presence was reassuring him. He didn't know when it had happened: he used to be feeling so uneasy when the chuunin was around - and he was still to some point. Yet, now he didn't want him to leave anymore. He'd need to add this to the number of things he didn't understand about Umino Iruka.

When the chuunin seemed to be about to sit up, the silver-haired felt his chest tighten and to keep the man by his side, he said the first thing that came to his mind.

"I haven't heard of Anko in the past two days," Kakashi heard himself say. The words were hardly out of his mouth that the jounin wanted to bang his head against the nearest hard surface in frustration. Reeeaaal nice. Of all the things he could have talked about, he had he managed to pick up a subject that was sure to make the chuunin uneasy and that made him sound like a real bastard. Nice work, really.

At least, Kakashi tried to see things under a positive light, he had not asked him about the weather again. That was already an improvement. Or something like that.

The Copy nin inwardly sighed with relief when Iruka didn't retort him an angry or bitter line; instead of looking discontented like Kakashi and expected him to, the academy teacher was looking sheepish again, blushing slightly to the jounin's surprise.

"Well, it appears that some neighbours complained about her speeches, er, disturbing their children," Iruka took a pause for good measure, his blush spreading rapidly on his tanned cheeks at the memory of the woman's blunt words, "and had gotten an injunction forbidding her to come any closer than 400 meters away from the apartment block."

Kakashi blinked at the chuunin as he proceeded the information in. Anko, the blood-loving sadist who managed to scare most of the nins in town with that twisted, perverse smile of hers, being officially forbidden access to the whole South area of the town by the Hokage herself because she offended Iruka's mostly civilian neighbours. That notion was so that the Copy nin couldn't help but snickering discreetly. Iruka must have noticed the man's amusement, because he looked away, coughing discreetly. But although he tried to hide it, Kakashi had not missed the academy teacher's amusement: from the corner of his eye, he could see that Iruka was also smiling, obviously holding back his own laughter.

Somehow Kakashi's snicker turned into a low, amused chuckle and Iruka soon joined him, indulging into his amusement. Before they even knew it, both men found themselves laughing softly together of Anko's funny situation and for a small, precious moment, it seemed as if the tension between the two ninja had disappeared, as if they were not two men troubled by issues they didn't understand and that plagued them, but old friends sharing a mildly amusing joke in a relaxed atmosphere.

Then, Iruka suddenly stopped chuckling and his eyes widened comically.

"The dinner!" the chuunin checked his watch and swore loudly in a very un-Iruka-ish way and the next thing Kakashi knew, the brown-haired man was gone, rushing to the kitchen. The jounin stared dumbly at the place where Iruka's back had disappeared from sight, stunned. A mere second ago, they had been together, laughing lightly and then crash! Reality came in, and Iruka was gone. He should have known it wouldn't last long... But for some reason, even though Iruka's hasty departure left Kakashi empty, the jounin couldn't wipe the smile off his clothed mouth. So he found himself smiling stupidly at the blank television in front of him, wondering why he was smiling in the first place.

Kakashi didn't know if he was feeling sad or amused, and he didn't know why he didn't understand what was going on in his own head either. But it didn't matter much. In fact, it had long stopped to matter to the silver-haired man. He had come to understand and accept this bittersweet predicament as something beyond his understanding. Something that just was. That was the way things were meant to be and all he could do was to learn to cope with it.

From underneath the blankets, a kitten could be heard letting out a tiny, high-pitched meow of either protest or fear. Kakashi could easily understand why. The poor traumatized thing had been brutally taken away from its mother to be abandoned in the cold mercilessly, caught in a situation he didn't even understand, weak and helpless. The jounin wished he'd be able to pat it, to comfort it in some way, but he couldn't. Kakashi snorted at the irony, because when it came down to it, he was just as helpless as the scared furball was.

At least, the kitten could cry out in protest. He wasn't expected to always remain stoic. He wasn't expected to be strong and unshakable, no matter what happened.

But Kakashi didn't worry too much over what scared the kitten so much. Because he knew that sooner or later, he'd learn to cope with it.

I just wanted to make clear that Kakashi thinks of his own helplessness as something purely physical, him being bed-ridden and all. But his helplessness has another dimension, as Kakashi, just like the kitten, is a traumatized and scared man, name the reasons. But Kakashi doesn't realize this: that's the way he's always lived. That's the very irony of the situation, because Kakashi doesn't even realize all the implications of his own conclusions. Just wanted to specify.

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