CHAPTER 4:
I wake up and I realize I'm sleeping on the couch. I look at my phone and It 's 11:50 am, I also see I have 2 missed calls from Jenna and a text from her saying 'We need to talk Rachel, I can't just forget what happened' I can't deal with that right now. I get up and go into the kitchen and I see a note on the table.
Took the kids to my mother's house, she's keeping them for the night. I'll be back around 5.
Well since the kids are gone for the night, maybe I can do something special for Quinn. Maybe get a few candles, order some food and get some roses. Hmm I think I will. I then remember I have to see Santana today. I go shower and get ready to go.
AT SANTANA'S HOUSE:
Santana: ''So let's talk about this Jenna thing first.''
Me: ''Okay, well I haven't fired her yet. She's called me twice already and she sent a text.''
Santana: ''What did she say?''
Me: ''That we needed to talk and she can't just forget about what happened.''
Santana: ''Okay, I need to ask you a few questions first before I can tell you how to handle it.''
I nod my head and say ''Okay''
Santana: ''Was it only one time?''
Me: ''Yes"
Santana: ''Do you or have you ever had feelings for her?''
Me: ''No, of course not''
Santana: ''Have you ever had talks about feelings or being together?
Me: ''Hell no Santana''
She puts her hands up and says ''Hey relax, I just need to know everything that happened between you two. This girl could be batshit crazy for all we know.''
Me: ''Well we never talked about feelings or relationships. We had sex and that's it.''
Santana: ''It sounds like this should be easy then, fire her ass but don't be rude about it. I mean you did have sex with her so just let her down gently or some shit.''
Me: ''Yeah I will, I guess I have time to do it today.''
Santana: ''The sooner the better Rachel. So how were things when you got home?''
Me: ''Quinn told me that if I mess up again it's pretty much over.''
Santana sighs and says ''Have you thought about telling her about Jenna?''
Me: ''No, I can't do that Santana. She'll leave me and I can't lose them.''
Santana: ''Rachel think about this, If you tell her of course she will be angry and probably kick you out but at least you were honest about it. She might be able to forgive you eventually BUT if she finds out from someone else or if she finds out by herself, it will only make it worst.''
Me: ''So I'm supposed to tell her and then just be prepared to lose my family? She won't find out Santana. I can't lose her and I won't.''
Santana: ''Rachel you made this mistake and you need to fix it. You said that you wanted to make things better, am I right?''
Me: ''Yes I do want to make things better but-'' She cuts me off and says
Santana: ''No Rachel, Tell her the truth. I promise you that it will count for something in.''
I think about what Santana says and she's right. I have to come clean and tell her everything. I can't keep this a secret anymore, it's killing me to. I want a fresh start with my family and the only way to have that is to be honest from this point on.
Me: ''You're right. I have to tell her and I will. She's probably going to leave me.'' I start to tear up a little
Santana: ''Look if things go wrong you know you can always stay here with me. I'm always here for you.''
Me: ''I know. We've always been like family.''
Santana: ''No, we're the real thing.'' She smiles and I do too. I don't know what I would do without Santana.
Me: ''Well I'm going to call Jenna and get this over with.''
Santana: ''Call me if you need me.''
I leave Santana's house and drive back to mine. I sit here and think about what I'm going to do. I pick up my phone and call my dad's. It's been awhile since I talked to them. They call me a lot but I haven't had time to call them lately. They talk to Quinn and the kids almost everyday. My dad Hiram has his own business called Berry Corporation, It's a family business and he's always wanted me to work there. I had other dreams so it never happened. My daddy Leroy always supported my music career and never wanted to force me into doing it.
''Rachel, where have you been? Your father and I have been trying to get in touch with you.'' Daddy seems a little upset
Me: ''I know daddy and I'm sorry I've just been busy. How are you guys?''
Leroy: ''We are fine Star, we've just been worried about you.'' Daddy's called me Star since I was a little girl. It always puts a smile on my face.
Me: ''Why would you be worried?''
Leroy: ''Well you haven't been answering your phone and when Quinn brings the kids to see us you never come with them. Are you two having problems baby?''
Me: ''No daddy it's fine. I'll come next time I promise. How is Dad?'' I change the subject because I don't want to get into that right now.
Leroy: ''He's good honey, he misses you.''
Me: ''I miss you guys too.'' I feel bad that I haven't been by to see them in a while.
Leroy: ''Are you sure everything is okay Star?''
I sigh and say '' Yeah daddy everything is fine.'' I don't want to worry them and I don't need them to be disappointed in me right now.
Me: ''I have to go daddy but I promise I'll see you soon though.''
Leroy: ''Okay baby, Make sure you kiss my grandbabies for me. I love you Star.''
Me: ''I will and I love you too daddy.''
I hang up the phone and decide that it's time I talk to Jenna. I call her and tell her to meet me at a park that's not too far from my home. I didn't want to take her to a restaurant or somewhere that would look to suspicious. I know a lot of people and I don't need anyone to suspect anything.
AT THE PARK:
We sit down on a bench and look at the ducks in the pond. She's not talking so I think I should start.
Me: ''Look Jenna, I'm sorry about what happened between us. It was wrong and unprofessional of me to do. I wasn't thinking that night about what I was risking and I messed up. I called you here to tell you that I have to fire you as my assistant. It's the right thing to do for me and my family.''
She's now looking at me but she doesn't say anything
Me: ''You going to say something?''
Jenna: ''You're right, I know what we did was wrong and unprofessional but I can't say I regret it Rachel. We have an attraction to each other and you can't deny that. What we had was special and-"
Me: ''Jenna what are you talking about? We had sex one time and that's it. Don't make it more than what it was.''
Jenna: ''So are you saying you didn't feel anything Rachel? It was just sex to you?''
Me: ''That's exactly what I'm saying Jenna. I don't have feelings for you and I'm sorry if I lead you on.''
Jenna: ''You're sorry if you lead me on? We had sex Rachel! You could've stopped it but you didn't. You wanted it as much as I did. I guess you just hire people just to fuck them and then throw them away like trash when you feel like it!''
Me: ''Jenna I'm sorry for-'' She cuts me off
Jenna: ''Fuck you Rachel, You don't have to worry about me anymore.'' She gets up and walks away
I feel a little bad that it ended that way but I'm just glad I finally did it. My phone rings and it's Puck.
Me: ''Hello''
Puck: ''Hey Rach, You're not still mad at me are you?''
Me: ''Yeah Puck I am, I needed you and you ditched me to bang some chick.''
Puck: ''Rach I'm sorry, I swear I am. I wasn't thinking.''
Me: ''Just forget it Puck''
He sighs and says "Well how are things with Q? Did she flip when you got home?''
Me: ''She gave me a warning that if I mess up again I will lose her.''
Puck: ''Rach come on, Q will never leave you. She loves you way too much. It's an empty threat.''
Me: ''Puck she's not joking. The look in her eyes when she threatened to leave looked pretty damn serious to me.''
Puck: ''Well what are you going to do?''
Me: ''I'm going to tell her everything Puck.''
Puck: ''Rach are you crazy? Why would you do that?''
Me: ''I have to be honest Puck. I can't hold this in and try to make a happy life pretending I didn't cheat on my wife. It wouldn't be real and she deserves to know the truth.''
Puck: ''So you're just going to tell her and lose your family? Don't do this Rach. What she doesn't know won't hurt her.''
I'm starting to realize that he really is an asshole sometimes. Santana was right, maybe I need to back away from Puck a little.
Me: ''Puck I have to go, I'll call you later.''
Puck: ''Okay well if things don't work out give me a call and we can go get a few drinks and hit the club.''
He's such an idiot sometimes. Wait, Where has he been staying?
Me: ''Puck where have you been staying?''
Puck: ''I'm staying with the chick from the party, she thinks that we're dating.'' He laughs and then says ''I'll just be there until I find a place.''
Me: ''Right, bye Puck.''
I don't know if he will ever change but I really hope so. I leave the park and go back home. Quinn should be coming in soon. Am I really ready to tell her? She wasn't joking when she said she would leave. Will she stay and work things out or Will she leave? When Quinn is hurt she always needs space. She has to have time to think about things before she makes a decision. I just hope it will be a decision that will keep her and my kids in my life. I hear keys in the door and I know that Quinn is home. I walk over to the door as it opens.
Me: ''Hey Q''
Quinn: ''Hey, were you here all day?''
Me: ''No I had a few errands to run, I got back a while ago.''
Quinn takes her jacket off and hangs it up.
Me: ''How are things with your mom?''
Quinn: ''Things are good, she was really happy to see the kids. She's always home alone so I think having them around really makes her feel better.''
Me: ''Yeah that's good, they always say they love being there.''
Quinn: ''Yeah because she spoils them with gifts and snacks.'' She laughs and I do too. I realize this might be the last time I see her smile and it breaks my heart.
I must be thinking too much because she asks ''Are you okay Rach?''
Me: ''Quinn can we sit down and talk?'' She looks confused but nods her head.
We go into the living room and sit down on the couch.
Me: ''Q you know that I love you right?''
Quinn: ''Rach, what's wrong?''
Me: ''Q I just need you to listen to me. Okay?''
Quinn: ''Okay"
Me: ''The first time we met, I already knew I wanted to be with you for the rest of my life. Everything about you made me fall in love with you. The day we got married was one of the best days of my life because I knew then that you were mine forever. I never thought that someone like me would lucky enough to have someone as amazing as you. Then we decided that we wanted to have Charlie and Lea and that was also one of the best days of my life. I can't picture a life without them. I can't picture a life without you. I know I have been messing up a lot lately but I promise you it has nothing to do with you or our kids. You've done nothing but love me Q and you deserve a lot more than what I've been giving. I love you more than you can imagine Quinn.''
I'm crying and she's crying too. This is probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to do but I know I have to.
Me: ''After I tell you this you'll probably want nothing to do with me but I need to tell you.''
Quinn is still crying but whispers ''Tell me what Rachel?''
It's Time to stand up and take responsibility Rachel. No more being a coward. No more hiding.
Me: ''I cheated on you Quinn.''
END OF CHAPTER 4
What did you guys think? What do you think will happen next? I love Santana in this story, she's pretty amazing. Do you think that's the last time we'll be seeing Jenna? Do you think Quinn will leave or is Rachel going to be the one packing her bags? Kurt, Kitty, Leroy, Hiram, Mercedes and Jessica will be in the next chapter.