There was a lot about the trip that Kelly would not learn.
The Volturi had heard a rumor that Edward and his newly-turned bride Bella had created a child vampire. The child vampire was actually a half-breed, conceived when Bella was still human. Edward had turned her after she almost died giving birth. But Alec, and the Volturi, had not known that at the time, and the whole band of them had set off for Forks to kill the Cullens.
"It's as if you want humans to band together and slaughter us into nonexistence," Alec had complained.
Alec had been going to fight in Forks with his sister Jane and the rest of the Volturi. He stopped at Danica's apartment first to warn her, knowing fully well she would be fighting on the opposite side. He also knew that Danica had already lost one family in her human years, and it would destroy her to lose another.
"You should know the peril your family is in and make your allegiances accordingly," Alec had said. "And if you do fight, I do not promise that I won't kill you."
"And I can't promise I won't kill you," Danica had returned, sealing their professional pact.
There was no battle. The Cullens were able to prove that their child was not a turned vampire. The only casualty of that day had been Irina, one of the three sisters who had raised Danica in her vampire incarnation. Irina had reported to the Volturi about the vampire child and started the whole mess. The Volturi had executed her for her false report.
Poor Irina. The girl had been inconsolable since the death of her mate Laurent. She had blamed the Cullens for Laurent's death, up until the end.
The first thing when Danica stepped into the office, Angela from Accounting had shoved a payroll form in her face. Danica had to sign another sheet confirming that this vacation was unpaid time off, because she had already used up her vacation days for "a silly wedding."
"Why did you even bother moving here if you go rushing back to them every time they get a paper cut?" Angela vented.
"You're absolutely right," Danica answered. "I'll tell them not to incur any life threatening injuries from now on."
While Michael or Dwight might have fallen for her mock sincerity, Angela recognized the insult. She puffed up her chest and marched away.
Then Michael summoned her to his office.
"You're fired," Michael told Danica.
Danica sat in front of his desk. She rested her hands on her knees.
"What?" Danica asked.
Michael issued a heavy sigh as he leaned forward in his plush boss's chair. He laced his fingers together.
"You took too many vacation days."
"You mean my unpaid time off for a family emergency?" Danica retorted. "You approved of those days off. If it was going to be a problem, why didn't you just say so?"
"That's irregardless," Michael answered, supplying one of his usual malapropisms. "It looks bad to have an employee miss so much work. So I have no choice but to ask you to leave. Besides," he added, "we all know what you were really doing on your time off."
"What was I doing?" Michael could not possibly know about the looming battle that had called her away. Nevertheless, Danica tensed with worry.
"You were . . . you were . . ." A smile cracked through Michael's stern expression. "You were auditioning in a porn movie."
He collapsed onto his desk top, his shoulders heaving with laughter.
"Is this a fake firing?" Danica asked. She recalled a clip from the show, which she was not supposed to have seen. Michael had pretended to fire an employee, just to get a reaction.
Michael pushed himself back upright. Tears streamed down his cheeks, he was laughing so hard.
"Yes," he gasped. "You should have seen your face. You were all like . . ." Another burst of laughter prevented him from revealing to Danica what she was "all like."
"Are you finished?" Danica asked. "Because I'd like to get to work."
Michael nodded his acquiescence, then collapsed when he was once again overcome with laughter.
Danica stood up and stalked back to the annex, where Kelly had already settled.
"How was Alaska?" Kelly asked, jumping in her seat with excitement.
Danica lied. "Fine."