"Somewhere, in another life, in another reality, you and I are married, and we have four kids, and we live in Vermont and I'm the mayor and ...you make jam...".
What if Scandal were a 1980s-style family situation comedy, rather than a drama?
The text below is my script for the sit-com pilot. Have a look, and tell me if you think it should be optioned, or remain on the summer slush pile!
I don't own Scandal, which is the exclusive property and creative achievement of Shonda Rhimes and the talented writers of Shondaland.
As always, this author is grateful for all readers and comments, negative and positive.
SCENE TWO: "Dirty Little Secrets"
We are now in the office of Fitzgerald Grant, Mayor of Hallingford, Vermont. The Mayor's office is a capacious, neo-colonial style office. There are large picture windows center stage, behind Fitzgerald's desk; a thick Turkish high-contrast rug on the floor; and a maple, hand-crafted, conference table. There are several empire-style chairs arranged around the table on the right side of the room; a few more chairs, and one leather arm chair, arranged around Fitzgerald's desk; and a sofa along the wall on the left side, near the Mayor's desk. Several bookcases, mostly stocked with collections of municipal statutes and works of local history, line the walls behind Fitz's desk. Shelves are also positioned between the two windows, which allow cheery shafts of natural light to shine through the office.
Fitzgerald is sitting behind his desk, which is piled high with papers, as well as an open laptop computer, and a land-line telephone. He leans back in an adjustable chair as he studies a report, brow furrowed in concentration.
There is a knock at the door, and Cyrus Beene, now a local district court judge as well as a member of Vermont University's Law School faculty, sticks his head in the partially open door.
CYRUS
Knock, knock…
FITZGERALD
Smiling, as he looks up from his report
The Honorable Judge Beene! What brings you here on a Friday afternoon, Cyrus? I'd have thought you'd be starting your weekend early….
CYRUS
Stepping through the threshold into Fitz's office
Believe me, I wanted to…but I needed to talk to you about something…
FITZGERALD
Leaning back in his chair; he is expecting a discussion of some civic policy, or a complicated local legal matter. He gestures to the sofa near his desk and puts down the manila folder he was reading from.
Have a seat….What's on your mind, Cy?
CYRUS
Looks around a little, hesitating…
I actually wanted to wait for someone else to get here….
FITZGERALD
Looks quizzical
Someone else?
He inclines his head, lowers his voice a little..
What's this all about, Cy? You look kind of upset..
CYRUS
Stalling; a bit too brightly as he sits down
So, how did Olivia take the news about Mellie Randolph coming to town?
FITZGERALD
Startled; this is a sore point, so if Judge Beene wants to distract him, this is clearly the right way to do it. Fitz looks wary as he replies to his old friend
You didn't come by to ask me that, did you?
CYRUS
Leaning forward
Well, no…but actually, inquiring minds are dying to know…what did Olivia say?
FITZGERALD
Raising his eyebrows
You do know this really isn't any of your business…..
Narrows his eyes as something occurs to him
Wait a minute….you and James didn't make another bet, did you?
CYRUS
Looking innocent
Now Fitz…when have James and I ever made bets about your marriage?
FITZGERALD
Wryly
Um…let's see…there was the time you made a bet with two colleagues at Georgetown about whether or not I would propose…
CYRUS
Smugly
I will point out that I won…
FITZGERALD
Retorts
Only because your colleagues were old cronies of Big Gerry's who assumed I'd cave to my father's pressure and break up with Livvie…
Sits back in his seat
CYRUS
Reasoning with Fitz; this is an old argument between friends, who occasionally like to travel down memory lane together
No one in Washington thought you'd actually have the nerve to defy your dad over a girl.
Cyrus shrugs and looks smug
If I knew better, was it such a terrible thing to derive a little…fiscal advantage?
Defensively
It wasn't exactly insider trading….
FITZGERALD
Reminding him…
And then there were the bets on the sex of our children…
CYRUS
Now it is his turn to retort
Fifty-Fifty are good odds! Besides….when I won, it paid for the baby gifts!
FITZGERALD
Laughing
You were wrong about the twins!
CYRUS
Shrugging
So…they still got presents, didn't they?
FITZGERALD
Laughing
You bought them pink teddy bears! You could have scarred them for life!
CYRUS
In mock offense
Excuse me? I was just making sure that you didn't impose any heteronormative toys on my Godsons…
Fitzgerald guffaws and the two laugh together for a few minutes and then Cyrus sobers first
You haven't told her, have you?
FITZGERALD
Stops laughing and hunches his shoulders sheepishly. One reason Cyrus considers Fitz a sure bet is because he know Fitz so well.
No, I haven't told her…
CYRUS
He is laughing again
Chicken!
FITZGERALD
A little defensively
Cy, have you ever seen Olivia get upset?
CYRUS
I saw Olivia get angry once. It was right after she started working for the Global Women's Center. There was an ambassador from Kygurdistan—smarmy guy, as I recall….making offhand remarks about the "availability" of American women.
Fitzgerald is listening, interested. He actually hasn't heard this story, at least not recently enough to remember it.
Livvie jumped down his throat. I've never seen a grown man look so terrified.
Laughs again
It was one of the best moments of my teaching career….
FITZGERALD
Nodding in approval and agreement. He is completely proud of his wife.
Livvie can be a formidable opponent.
But I'm talking about Olivia upset.
Cyrus looks uncomprehending
FITZGERALD
Clarifying, with some irritation
Upset, Cyrus.
Fitz lowers his voice as he leans forward to share a confidence
Her lower lip trembles.
CYRUS
Her lower lip?
FITZGERALD
She gets all teary...
CYRUS
Genuinely surprised
TEARY? Olivia?
FITZGERALD
And then she locks herself in the bathroom….
He sighs heavily as he remembers..
And the worst fight we ever had was over Mellie, while Olivia was pregnant with Nicole.
Fitz swallows hard before continuing.
Olivia locked herself in the bathroom for twelve hours.
CYRUS
Leaning forward; he has never heard this story
Wait—this was in that tiny apartment on Wisconsin Avenue, right? The one-room basement with a boiler cage separating the kitchen and the bedroom?
FITZGERALD
Nodding
Yep…the one we had to move into after my father cut me off—it was all we could afford on Livvie's salary at the Global Women's Center while I was still commuting to Boston…
Fitz's face grimaces as he remembers
…It was in the middle of winter, too—the bathroom had the water heater so it was the only place in that apartment where the temperature ever went above forty degrees…
Cyrus starts to laugh
I guess Olivia really froze you out that time, Fitz, huh?
FITZGERALD
Sourly
You can laugh now, but it wasn't funny at the time. I kept on pounding on the door, begging Livvie to just talk to me…and then I'd have to run to the closet to pull on another sweater…
Cyrus only laughs harder
FITZGERALD
I think I was wearing about five sweaters under my coat by the time she finally came out…
CYRUS
What set her off?
FITZGERALD
We had run into Mellie at a reception Olivia had to go to in Washington—I think Bill Randolph had made some kind of donation to the Women's Center, and Mellie was there, representing him…
CYRUS
And Mellie made a pass at you?
FITZGERALD
Narrows his eyes, remembering…
It wasn't exactly a pass… relenting…well, alright, yes, I suppose it was a pass…Mellie was flirting, and I didn't stop her, because I didn't think it really mattered, and humoring her seemed to make more sense than cutting her off and taking the chance that she'd make a scene…
Sighs glumly
So then we got home, and Olivia made the scene….
Appealing to Cyrus
But the thing is, Cy, I haven't had any contact with Mellie—not so much as a phone call, or a Christmas card—since that night, sixteen years ago. I haven't even talked to Mellie about the factory! The offer to build-all the labor arrangements—everything—is coming through her lawyers... We haven't even exchanged emails!
CYRUS
Thoughtfully
What do you think is going on?
FITZGERALD
I'm not sure….
Confiding
To be honest, I think it might Bill Randolph, and my father, who've cooked this up...it wouldn't be that hard to dig up the news about how the Hallingford Paper Mill closed down two years ago, and how I ran for mayor on a ticket of urban renewal after that whole scandal threw so many people out of work…
Fitz moves one hand through his hair in an agitated manner…
..And the thing is, Cy, they made me an offer I couldn't refuse—not just because of all the unemployed folks who could go back to work if the Jam Factory opened here, but the way that Randolph Confections is promising to source all their fruit supplies from local farms….
Fitz leans forward, appealing to Cyrus for understanding
This factory could be best thing that's happened to this town in years—the economic miracle that would finally put everyone in Hallingford back to work….
Fitz sinks back in his chair, distressed
…Was I really supposed to turn all that down just because the C.E.O. of Randolph Confections happens to be my college ex-girlfriend?
CYRUS
Who has grown increasingly sympathetic through this speech, and now attempts a lame joke
Well, think of it this way—you would be the first politician in American history to actually keep a campaign promise by lying to your wife…
FITZGERALD
Annoyed
That's not funny, Cy.
CYRUS
Soberly
I'm sorry—I shouldn't be making jokes…but seriously, Fitz, why don't you just tell Olivia what you just told me? She knows politics; she had plenty of experience on the Beltway even before she met you…I'm sure you could make her understand…..
FITZGERALD
I was going to tell her this weekend.
Cyrus nods approvingly
But first, I was going to take all the locks off our bathroom doors.
Cyrus is about to reply to that when there is a knock on the Mayor's Office door.
Who is it?
Fitz's secretary, Lauren, peaks her head around the door
Mr. Mayor, District Attorney Rosen is here to see you…
Fitzgerald's eyebrows go up
FITZGERALD
Looking puzzled
Sure, send him in….
He looks at Cyrus
Do you know what this is all about?
CYRUS
I've been waiting for Rosen to arrive before we talk to you about this…
Enter David Rosen, Hallingford's District Attorney, with an accordion file of papers under one arm. He is all business, and a little non-plussed to see Cyrus there before him.
DAVID
Stiffly formal
Mr. Mayor, Judge Beene….I thought the Judge might wait to talk to you about this until I was here to present all the evidence…
FITZGERALD
He leans back in his chair a bit, and looks official, challenged by David's tone
Talk to me about what, David?
Fitz gives Cyrus a sidelong glance
Cyrus hasn't told me a thing…
David Rosen relaxes a little bit…
And please, call me Fitz….and sit down, David….
Fitz rises from behind his desk and walks toward the door, as David sits down in a straight-backed empire chair opposite Fitz's desk.
Did either of you gentlemen want anything? Coffee? Water?
DAVID
I don't need anything, thank you Mr. Mayor….I mean, Fitz….
CYRUS
Grinning
Some coffee would be great…
FITZGERALD
Fine, I'll see to it.
He pokes his head out the door, and we hear him ask Lauren to get some coffee…he turns to Cyrus…
It's light with two sugars, right?
CYRUS
Makes a face
Just light…James is making me cut back on sugar…
DAVID
Finally relaxing a bit
Don't tell my wife that…sugar is her livelihood..
CYRUS
And I'm one of her best customers…just don't tell my husband…
DAVID
Looking levelly at Cyrus
Dirty little secrets always come out, Judge Beene…
Lauren enters with coffee
LAUREN
Here you are, Judge Beene…are you sure you don't want something, Mr. Rosen?
DAVID
No thanks, I'm fine…
FITZGERALD
Genially
Thanks, Lauren
When the door shuts behind Lauren, Fitz turns to Cyrus and David with mild irritation and a patch of anxiety
Ok, so now we have the room, and you gentlemen have the floor. What's this all about?
Cyrus and David exchange glances
CYRUS
In a low voice, to David
You tell him…
DAVID
In the same low voice, to Cyrus
No, you tell him…
CYRUS
Hissing
I was holding off on telling him because I was waiting for you!
DAVID
Hissing back
Yes, but now that I think about it, maybe he'll take it better coming from you….
FITZGERALD
Looks from David to Cyrus with mounting exasperation. His voice rises
Would the two of you just tell me what the hell is going on?
Cyrus and David begin to say something at the same time, and finally Cyrus looks up at Fitz with a somewhat abashed but serious look
CYRUS:
Billy Chambers has been indicted.
FITZGERALD
Turns from Cyrus to David with genuine alarm
What? Are you serious?
CYRUS
Shaking his head
Of course we're serious…Would the two of us make something like that up?
Fitzgerald walks back to his desk and sinks heavily into his chair
DAVID
Clearing his throat
I'm sorry to report that Chambers has been indicted for accepting bribes…
FITZGERALD
Looking grave
Is there going to be an investigative commission?
CYRUS
That's a possibility….
DAVID
But it's actually looking more likely that the Vermont Department of Justice will handle it by deputizing me to act as a local investigating official
This is news to Cyrus, who gives David an inquiring look who turns to Cyrus with an explanation
I just got off the phone with the Governor's D.A. That's why I was late…
FITZGERALD
David, I know Hallingford couldn't have a better man on the case than you…
DAVID
Thank you, Mr. Mayor…
FITZGERALD
But what, exactly, are the charges? The circumstances?
Cyrus looks carefully at Fitzgerald
CYRUS
Fitz, you really didn't know anything about this?
FITZGERALD
Looks up in genuine innocence
No, I didn't.
He looks a little sheepish
I'm thinking I should have, actually. Never got a good vibe off of Chambers…the man's a sleaze…
CYRUS
Sententiously
Just the sort of person Hallingford needed as a Public Defender!
FITZGERALD
Shrugging his shoulders
Well, I didn't appoint him! He was "sunsetted" in by my predecessor, Sally Langston, if you recall…
CYRUS
Conceding
Fair enough.
DAVID
Pulling papers out of the accordion file he's been holding on his lap
Approximately two months ago, it was confirmed that Chambers had been taking bribes from the Scorpion Network…
FITZGERALD
This was the drug gang that your team prosecuted two years ago, right?
DAVID
Nodding
That's correct, Mr. Mayor. If you recall, we were in the middle of closing arguments about the time you got elected…
David leans forward and hands a manila envelop with papers to Fitzgerald
This is the transcript of the evidence in that case….
He sits back in his chair, rummages through the envelop, and produces another folder which he also places on Fitz's desk
And this is a transcript from the wiretap we had set up with Judge Beene's authorization on Scorpion Network communications.
David sits back in his chair and delivers the last piece of news while looking directly at Fitz
They were using cell phones and attempting to cover their tracks, but it's looking like the network extended to several of the board members at the Paper Mill who also pleaded guilty to embezzlement…
FITZGERALD
He is truly shocked
Good God! So the Scorpion Gang basically had fingers in every pie in town!
DAVID
Dryly
The only pies they didn't touch are the ones my wife bakes, I'm afraid….
FITZGERALD
His voice is serious; grim
Where is Chambers now?
DAVID
He's been released on his own recognizance, given a court date for about three months from now…the rumor is he's hiring an attorney, some slick fellow from New York, a Harrison…
David looks appealingly at Cyrus as he fumbles for the name
CYRUS
Picking up where David left off
Harrison Wright. Young fellow; clever; handsome. Finished up a few years ago at NYU Law. Do you or Olivia know him?
FITZGERALD
Shaking his head
Never heard of him. But he'd better be good, because Billy Chambers is in a lot of trouble….and it sounds like he could finish up as a long-term guest of the fair state of Vermont.
He looks from Cyrus to David apprehensively.
There's more, isn't there? I can tell from the look on your faces….
Cyrus and David exchange glances
CYRUS
In a low voice, to David
You tell him…
DAVID
In the same low voice, to Cyrus
No, you tell him…
CYRUS
Hissing
I was holding off on telling him because I was waiting for you!
DAVID
Hissing back
Yes, but now that I think about it, maybe he'll take it better coming from you….
FITZGERALD
Gentlemen, we aren't really doing this twice, are we? If I wanted to watch a two man comedy routine, I'd go home to my television set…
CYRUS
Speaking on top of David as he turns apologetically to Fitzgerald
It's just that this part may be a bit harder to hear…
DAVID
Speaking on top of Cyrus as he also turns toward the Mayor
We were concerned about the implications…and how you would react…
FITZGERALD
Holding up his hand to stop them both
Gentlemen! One at a time!
He frowns and turns to David and addresses him as slowly and distinctly as possible
District Attorney Rosen, What. Is. This. About?
DAVID
He is somber and somewhat apologetic; he knows that what he is about to say will not be well received
Mr. Mayor, there seems to be evidence that Billy Chambers was not only taking bribes, but sharing them with Hallingford's police department…
FITZGERALD
Bracing himself
Go on….
DAVID
Swallows hard
There is preliminary evidence that Captain Ballard may be involved….
FITZGERALD
David knows he is talking about one of the Mayor's oldest friends; Fitzgerald has set his jaw.
How conclusive is this "preliminary evidence?"
DAVID
His look of apprehension has not disappeared
There are a few conversations among those we lifted from the authorized wiretaps that suggest the distinct possibility that Captain Ballard may have been complicit with some of Chambers's activities…
Fitzgerald now stands up; he is clearly quite upset, and looks out the window
FITZGERALD
Turning back to David and Cyrus
Give me the whole thing, gentlemen, from start to finish. When did you first suspect, how did you blow this open?
DAVID
We began to suspect something was off about two years before your election, Mr. Mayor.
He steps in, a little closer to Fitzgerald's desk.
It was after Chambers oversaw that completely lackluster defense for Arthur Hornbecker…
FITZGERALD
Although Fitz and Olivia began building their house in Hallingford shortly after the twins were born (after Fitz's mother died, and left Fitz a generous inheritance), the Pope-Grants began by using their residence in Hallingford as a summer vacation home while they were still living in Washington, D.C., before moving to Hallingford permanently right after Aleta was born. What finally brought Olivia and Fitzgerald to Hallingford permanently was the job offer Fitz received to teach at Vermont University. Once Fitz established residency in Hallingford, he ran for Mayor; but because Fitz had not lived in Hallingford as long as David Rosen, or even Cyrus Beene, there are parts of the story of the Hallingford Paper Mill Scandal Fitz has only heard about second-hand. Because Cyrus and James moved to Hallingford from Washington a few years before Fitz and Olivia did, Cyrus is more familiar with the backstory than Fitzgerald. So Fitz is asking for clarification to confirm the significance of the name:
Hornbecker was that bookkeeper who first reported the accounting discrepancies at the Paper Mill, and then was accused of murder, yes?
DAVID
That's correct, Mr. Mayor.
David looks a little ashamed, and then continues
I know I'm the District Attorney, and we were winning the case against Hornbecker easily, but it started to look more and more to my team like Chambers and his people weren't doing anything to fight on Hornbecker's behalf—by the time the jury was ready to deliberate, it was really looking like a circumstantial murder charge, and a flimsy one at that…I offered Hornbecker a plea, but Chambers refused to let him take it; and the jury convicted him…
CYRUS
Chiming in
I wasn't comfortable with the way Chambers was handling the defense either, so when the jury rendered their verdict, I gave Hornbecker the minimum allowed sentence— with an assurance that, with good behavior, he'd be eligible for parole as soon as possible….
Shakes his head, remembering
David had won his case but there was just something that felt wrong about the whole thing…
DAVID
Picking up the thread
It turned out Chambers and his people had looked the other way while the police tampered with evidence that would have blown away the state's case…
FITZGERALD
Grimly
And then two days after Hornbecker was convicted, he was found dead in his prison cell. They said it was a suicide.
DAVID
Hanging his head
Now we aren't so sure.
FITZGERALD
Sits down again, and picks up one of the files David gave him
And you think Jake was involved?
DAVID
Carefully, sympathetically
We think he might have been, Mr. Mayor…
FITZGERALD
Taking command
O.K. I can't believe that Jake would be party to anything like this, so as far as I'm concerned, Captain Ballard is innocent until proven guilty. When and if your people have conclusive evidence, I want to see it.
He swallows hard
If we have to prosecute, we will, to the fullest extent of the law—but if we don't….
CYRUS
Reassuring
There's nothing we'd like more than to see Captain Ballard cleared, Fitz. He's a great guy.
DAVID
Agreeing with Cyrus
Yes, Mr. Mayor.
FITZGERALD
In dismissal mode; he'd like to be alone for a few minutes to contemplate the possibility that one of his oldest Navy buddies may be corrupt
I want to thank you gentlemen for bringing this to my attention.
Once more, Cyrus and David exchange glances
CYRUS
Actually, Fitz….there is one more thing…
FITZGERALD
Apprehensive, irritated
What now?
CYRUS
David and I were wondering where we're going to find a new person to coordinate the Public Defender's Office now that Chambers is out…the office already has cases backlogged a good six months because Chambers wasn't doing his job properly…
FITZGERALD
Leaning forward to look between the two men
You have someone in mind, don't you?
CYRUS
Hesitating just a moment
Actually, we did….
FITZGERALD
Who?
David and Cyrus exchange glances
FITZGERALD
Anticipating, and hoping to circumvent, another back-and-forth routine
Yes?
DAVID
Hesitating
We were…that is to say we thought maybe….
FITZGERALD
Pressing; these are two of his closest associates and he really respects and values them, but right now they are driving him crazy
Who?
CYRUS
Stuttering
…um….Olivia?
FITZGERALD
Startled
Oh!
Fitz settles back in his chair a bit, and considers as David dives in…
DAVID
The thing is, we all know Olivia Pope wears the white hat. Georgetown law; background in Global Women's Rights …she's squeaky clean…she would never take a bribe, or tamper with evidence…or negligently represent a client….and she wouldn't let anyone else do it on her watch, either…
CYRUS
Pressing their case
And it would be doable for Olivia, Fitz…there would be some litigation, of course, but a great deal of it would be managing other litigators, particularly the local attorneys who sign up as public defenders….
He pauses and continues as Fitz continues to look between the two men thoughtfully
Even if Olivia didn't want to do this forever—even if she only stepped in as an interim P.D—which we would totally understand- she'd do a terrific job, and the advantage of working for the town, rather than a private firm, is that she'd have a better shot at working predictable hours and spending some time with the kids…I know that's important to you both right now….
DAVID
Puts in the last argument
If you would speak to her about sending her resume, I could bring her into my office for an interview…I can't guarantee her the job, of course, but I can say her application would be very strongly considered….and, actually, Fitz…the sooner Olivia sends her resume, the better….
Emphatically
This Monday, for example, would be really, really great….
FITZGERALD
Hesitating
I'd have to talk to Livvie…she stopped working five years ago when Aleta was born, but her license is still good through next April…
Fitzgerald is thinking deeply about it for a few minutes, and then finishes slowly…
I don't want to speak for her, but I have a feeling she just might be interested…
Close up on Fitz's pensive face.
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The author apologizes for any liberties she may have taken with legal procedure in this chapter. I would also like to take this opportunity to thank those readers who have expressed interest in this piece! I am honored and grateful for your attention.