[Disclaimer] Everything Twilight belongs to Mrs. Stephenie Meyer
[A/N] Thanks to all of you, who read and reviewed the last chapter. Your support means everything to me.
**Nerds**
"Do I look okay?" I ask Bella while I continue sipping on the milkshake between my hands. It had taken me forever to choose what I wanted to wear and I still wasn't sure if I looked alright. I was nervous, my palms sweaty, my face flushed despite the icy air-conditioned atmosphere in her car.
"You look pretty. Stop being nervous, Alice, everything is going to be fine."
"I don't know if this is right. Maybe I should have confronted my parents with this first. Maybe there is a reason why they didn't want me to meet my birth mother."
"Yes, of course, there is a reason. Your parents are jealous jerks who love treating you like a baby, especially your mother. She loves you but she needs to learn how to let go."
"What if my birth mother hates me?"
Bella sighs, parking the car as she had finally reached our destination. It had been a three hour drive to the address Mr. Volturi had given my father in his letter. What we are doing is stupid and risky. Maybe her fiancé doesn't even live here anymore.
"Come here to me, baby. You are trembling. Please, don't be so nervous. I know this is difficult for you. I'm here. You're not on your own."
She puts my hair behind my ear and leans forward to kiss my mouth.
"Tastes good, tastes like more. I love you. I'll always love you."
Walking towards the house, I try to flatten my crinkled skirt, repeating in my head what I'm intending to say in case someone actually opens the door.
"Hi," a chubby little boy asks me, while he continues stuffing candy in his mouth. "Are you my babysitter?"
I'm frozen, unable to move or speak. Does he look anything like me? No, he's blond and has brown eyes.
"Do you want some too?" he asks, offering me the package with a grin. "They are so yummy."
"Are your mom or dad home?" Bella asks him, wrapping her arms around me to keep me from falling over. I feel so terribly agitated that I'm close to crying.
"Daddy! My babysitters are here!"
"Liam, I told you not to open the door on your own!" The father calls from inside the house. When he shows up a moment later, he's wiping some black grease from his hands.
"I'm sorry. One can't leave him alone for five minutes. I was just working on my bike. Are you the babysitters the agency sent us?"
"No, we're not." Bella tells him while I try to remember how to use my mouth. "We're actually here because we're looking for someone who used to live here…possibly, a Miss Brandon."
"What do you want from her?"
"She…I …well…I…I …," I stumble out, "Do you know her? It's really important."
"I'm afraid Miss Brandon doesn't live here anymore."
"Oh," I whisper, feeling the blood leaving my face. Damn it, we should have called instead of just driving here. But what the hell should I have told them on the phone? God, this is such an awkward situation.
He smirks and runs his fingers through his blond hair.
"She's Mrs. Connor now. But right now my wife is not home. She's still at her office."
"Daddy, tell them they need to play with me! Tell them."
"Go to your room, sweetie. I'll look after you in a few minutes."
When the little one walks off, his father clears his throat, crossing the arms in front of his chest as if he doesn't know what to do with the unexpected intruders.
"Why do you want to see my wife? You're not from the press, are you?"
"Press?"
"Yes, the press. Those shitheads have no shame molesting her since her father's funeral and I'm tired of filling reports on that."
"We're not from the press, no need to worry." Bella tells him, tightening her grip around me. If it wasn't for her holding me, I would just collapse on the floor. My nerves are blank and with a loud sob, I burst out into tears.
"Alice, honey. Please, don't cry now."
"What's wrong with her? Is there anything I can do?"
"Can we come in for a moment? It's a bit complicated." Bella stats rubbing my back as she pulls me against her chest.
He nods his head and guides us inside the house, shoving some toys from the couch before he tells us to sit down on it.
"Why are you crying? If you need a lawyer your parents should…,"
"My parents don't know that I'm here."
I wipe my nose and sniff loudly. My entire face is probably smeared with mascara now. Then I grab my handbag, searching through the mess in it before I find the letter my father's lawyer sent.
"This is why I'm here." I whisper huskily.
His eyes widen, as he grabs the letter from my quivering hands and reads through it.
"You think you're Rachel's kid?"
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come here. It was a stupid idea. Bella, we should go."
"No, please stay. I…can you just stay where you are? I'll be right back."
He rushes to the kitchen and I can hear him talk in a low voice to someone on the phone. When he returns, he carries several bags of candy stuff with him.
"Maybe you like those? Rachel always likes some candy to calm her nerves. I asked my wife to come home early today, but not why. It would agitate her too much."
"Are you my…father? My real father, I mean?"
"Please, call me Peter. If I was your father, you'd know it. If I was your father, your grandfather hadn't managed to pull this adoption crap against Rachel's will."
"Against her will? My parents have told me that she abandoned me as a baby."
"No, she hasn't. Look, I have to make sure the boy doesn't flush his hamster down the toilet. Make yourself comfortable."
Bella leans forward, wiping a bit of smeared make-up from underneath my eyes. Then she plants a soft kiss on the tip of my nose, caressing my hair with her fingers to help me to calm down.
"He seems nice, doesn't he? I bet your mother is nice too. She'll be happy to see you."
"But what if she doesn't like me? What if she doesn't like me because I'm fat?"
"Alice, breathe. Everything is going to be fine. She'll like you. She'll love you. You are a wonderful, smart and caring person."
I stuff several hands full of candy stuff between my lips until Bella grabs the bag and shoves it over to the other side of the table.
"Do you know why your wife didn't keep me?" I ask Peter when he returns after a few minutes. He nods his head and sits down next to us, rubbing his eyes for a moment as if he's trying to figure out how to explain things.
"See, Rachel was only sixteen when she got pregnant with you. Her parents were furious but when they found out about it, but it was already too late for…other options."
I can hear a key turning in the lock, followed by some barking noises as a tiny little nothing of a dog rushes into the house.
"Stay here, Tiffy! Bad dog! Damn it, Peter. I can't stand this thing. My mother has spoiled her too much."
Breathlessly, she enters the room, making me almost jump up from the couch. She doesn't look much like me. Yet we look completely the same. Her hair is dyed in a very light blonde color and pulled in a thick bun. Her eyes are a bright blue against the dark frames of her glasses. What I like most is that her shape is so close to mine, curvy and round.
Peter doesn't need to explain to her who I am. The moment she sees me, she drops her handbag and some rolls of paper to the ground. A split second later her arms are around me, her hug so tightly that I can't breathe properly. She sobs desperately, trembling all over while she starts planting countless kisses all over my hair and my face. I don't know what to do. I just feel like this is too much closeness, more than I can handle. Still, I don't dare to ask her to let go of me.
"Daddy, what is Mommy doing with my babysitter?"
"It's okay, sweetie. Your Mom is just agitated. Do you want to take Tiffy out in the garden to play with her?"
"Hmm,"
When the boy is out of sight, Peter wraps his arm around his wife, pulling her gently from me.
"Darling, you are scaring the girl. Try to calm down a bit. I know how difficult this must be for you."
"No, you don't." she croaks. "You don't know how it is like to have a child and they take it away from you. How it's like not to know if she's alright, if the people she's with take good care of her."
She cleans her nose on a tissue her husband handles her after he manages to pull her on his lap, stroking up and down her spine in small circles.
"I'm sorry, darling. I can't tell you how sorry I am."
"But she gave me away. She didn't want me." I start hesitantly, my voice thick with tears.
"Of course, I wanted you. How can think I didn't want you? My father…he gave you away after you were born. No one ever asked me what I wanted to do. No one cared."
"Alice, you must know that my father-in-law was a pretty intimidating man. He was afraid it would cause some sort of scandal if his minor daughter had a child. It was so important to him, what kind of impression he made in public."
"Is he in politics?" Bella asks him with a frown on her face. "Who cares what other people think?"
"My father did. He insisted that the company only made it that far because people trusted them to stick to the true values of family and honor. At the time I got pregnant, he was offered some big contracts in Asia, to start selling overseas as well."
"What is his company producing?" I ask Rachel, glad that my nerves have finally managed to calm down again. She's nice. She doesn't hate me and I have a certain feeling, I'm going to get along with her.
"This," she tells me, pointing to one of the bags on the table in front of us. "This is what our family company is producing. My father is the former CEO of American Candy."