Very long and indulgent Rose and Dimitri moment for us RXD fans!!! I almost bumped this one to M based on this chapter. But after reading some others listed as T decided not to. Let me know if you think the rating needs to be bumped up. Thanks and feel free to review.... Disclaimer... I do not own any of these characters

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I opened the door and found Dimitri standing there, all 6 ft 7 of him in all his brooding glory. He stood in my doorway just staring at me; the look was sultry and tortured. I return his stare, with my fiercest glare waiting to show him I was just as strong as he was. The emotions in his eyes were racing, but the one he settled on was tender. I started to lose my self in that gaze. I snapped myself out of it, he was here to finish our conversation on how we couldn't be together, had to cut down on our practices i.e. alone time together. blah blah blah. He was here to tell me one more time how we couldn't be together. The tenderness I was seeing… yeah that was him feeling sorry for me. I didn't need anyone feeling sorry for Rose Hathaway. That thought shifted my anger into full force, I lashed out at him, I had to protect myself.

Don't just stand there staring Comrade, you came to me! What do you want, come on speak up I don't have all day, unlike some people I have friends and a life to get back to. It was cruel, and I regretted it as soon as the words came out. Dimitri was the definition of a loner. I was the one person he opened up to, the one person he let really know his soul. And I was using that to insult him. Nice yeah I'm a great person! I quickly looked away not wanting to know if my comment caused him pain. I was angry but I didn't want to hurt him, I never wanted to hurt him.

His reaction was to grab my chin and force my eyes back up to his. I tried to look at him but couldn't it was too much; his eyes held too much, I couldn't go there with my emotions so raw, my eyes shifted down again. I am such a coward but these last few days. God everyone enjoys a little teen angst but I was getting mine and Lissas shoved down my throat lately. He repositioned his hands behind my head and forced my eyes to his. Ok apparently this was a battle that Dimitri was determined to win. Damn his eyes were so deep, he won; I let him hold my gaze. "I'm sorry Roza, I hate myself for hurting yo… before he could finish his head popped up. Why does your room smell like clove cigarettes, and why are you wearing that?" he looked me over with an expression of shocked awe.

I hadn't even noticed I was wearing the nighty from my dream. It was not the boy short underwear and tank top I had gone to sleep in. What the hell was going on? Adrian had invaded my dream but had he invaded my room at the same time? I am so going to kill him. A look of rage filled Dimitris face. "A life to go back to huh, you do move fast Rose I'll give you that!" there was an edge to Dimitri's voice,

"You don't understand," I said

" What's not to understand He was here, I can smell him and with you dressed like that, he wasn't here for a nice friendly game of checkers!" He spat the words at me His anger was growing I could see it taking form, He turned on his heals to leave. I grabbed his arm but he pulled away.

"You have no right, I shouted " I don't owe you any answers, I want to be with you and you push me away. It would serve you right if I was with Adrian. At least he wants me." Dimitri was in my face so quickly! Even though I have seen his speed a million times it still awes me how graceful he is. This time he was graceful and angry. The rage coming off him made my breath catch, seeing his fury made me remember that I had a god standing before me, and his anger was so powerful it made me shake.

"He does want you, he wants to toy with you, to use you as his next big conquest, he wants you to be his very own feeder, but I guess that's right up your alley though isn't it."

I couldn't believe Dimitri had said that to me, it was fierce and cruel. He was attacking me, and it hurt worse than any of the blows he landed in practice. This must be what they mean when they say you only hurt the ones you love. I don't think he could believe he said it either. He instantly looked pained, he knew me better than that. He had heard the rumors about me in the past but he knew that wasn't true. At the same time he did know me, and he knew that I had fed Lissa when we were gone, he also sensed in a way I liked it. I could see that in his eyes and it made the words cut even deeper. He was sorry because we both knew in a way his words held truth. On instinct I swung my hand to slap him across the face, but of course he saw it coming and grabbed my wrist shy of it making contact. He held my wrist hard, keeping it in the air only inches from his face.

"Bastard" I yelled and tried to remove my arm. My struggle released the wall of tears that had built up in my eyes. Upon seeing this he released my arm. I started beating my fists against his chest " I hate you, I hate you, I repeated over and over." Breaking down into full crying mode. I kept pounding away at him, and he let me. He finally wrapped his arms around me and pulled my tear soaked face into his chest my hands still balled in fists next to my face. He just held me there, I collapsed, it had all been too much. The emotions of the past few days, the weird new compulsion technique that Adrian had unleashed on me, in my dream. Dimitri picked me up in his arms cradling me and carried me to the bed. He sat down on my bed still cradling me in his arms he wiped my tears away. Then brought his lips to mine, we kissed lightly his body tightened a little when I opened my mouth to deepen the kiss. It wasn't a tightening from passion though it was more like he was surprised. Suddenly I thought of morning breath and wished I had a mint. Feeling awkward I pulled away. He let me out of the kiss but kept his hand twined up into my hair and our faces close together.

"I never meant to hurt you, I'm sorry for what I said I am constantly telling you how young you act and look how I behave. He was apologizing to me and chastising himself all at the same time. "I'm older than you and I thought I knew what was best, but I don't. I don't seem to know anything anymore. I wanted to be your hero I wanted to be the man that you deserve. But instead, look what I've done I have pushed you to that conniving jerk Ishkov" His voice was soft and gentle yet full of horror and rage. I looked up at him, cupped my hands around his face and said, "You didn't, I mean I didn't, with Adrian I mean." For some reason I was struggling with my words.

"Rose, I smell the cloves in your hair and on your body more than in the room' he still spoke with that gentle pain. " I know he was just here, you don't have to lie to me, I know its my fault."

"He wasn't here," I argued "well he was here but he wasn't." Oh hell I didn't know if he was really here or not, I wasn't sure anymore what happened while I was asleep, but I realized I had to try to explain to Dimitri, "Dimitri there is something I have to tell you. I could see him brace himself, his mind was preparing itself for the worst and in his mind the worst was imaging me with Adrian. That knowledge made my heart flutter and I felt the last bit of anger I had been holding onto release from my body.

"Adrian, has been coming to me in my dreams" I hesitated looking up to see surprise sweep Dimitri's face.

I continued, " He can connect us, he builds the dream sequence. I am where he wants me, wearing what he wants me to wear, seeing what he wants me to see."

I felt his hands ball into fits against my back but he didn't interrupt he just wanted for me to keep going. So I did " Normally it is not a big deal, he flirts… "

"Normally" his voice broke, " How long has this been going on Rose?"

"Pretty much since we first met on the ski trip" The emotion that crossed his face now wasn't one of anger, or jealousy. It was one of pain, it hurt him when I kept things from him, and I could see that now. I waited for him to say something else, he seemed to realize I was waiting on him and said " Keep going, you said normally it is not a big deal, so I assume this time it was a big deal? He glanced down at the negligee again, eyeing it worriedly, not the emotion this piece should evoke in a hot blooded male, but I guess when you were imaging your love wearing it for someone else it loses some of its stimulation factor." Sensing the true issue, I said " I don't know why I am wearing this or how, and I don't know why my room and my body smell like him. THAT has never happened before. When the dreams end I am back wherever I was wearing whatever I was wearing. And not smelling like this. He was able to control me more in this dream time, stop me from moving, direct my thoughts not just the images in the dream he could actual direct me. I shook my head still trying to sort it out myself so I could explain it.

" Rose you need to tell me what happened in this dream, did he … Dimitris body turn to stone beneath me. I felt every muscle in his body tense. He leaned forward otherwise I never would have heard him. The words came out with a deadly intensity that I had never heard before come from Dimitri… "Did he hurt you?" I knew instantly what he meant by Hurt! Considering what I was wearing and that my body smelled of him, I knew what Dimitri was thinking, I quickly grabbed his face and looked him straight in the eye. " No, I said loud and clear not even blinking as I stared him down. No Dimitri I would never let him do that."

" But he tried didn't he, you don't only smell like his cigarettes you taste like them too." I stammered a little, that really caught me off guard. " I do?"

" Rose please what happened" I broke down and told him everything. The way I could feel Adrian's desire, the heat that built between us, the fire that burned around us the kiss. Everything, and by the look on his face right now too much. I quickly scrambled ahead to the part where I tossed Adrian off of me, and through the parts about the darkness he saw around me. Then I just stopped talking, and looked at him. We sat there in that endless moment and I was suffocating. Finally I broke the silence. The silence was killing me I needed to know what he was thinking.

I asked "are you ok?" He let out a slight sigh as he shook his head, "Am I alright? He asked it like a question too, "how can you be worried about me right now, why do you always worry about yourself last." I adjusted myself in his lap. I turned to face him straddling my knees on either side of his legs, he looked down to me as I said, and "You're avoiding the question" his arms came around me and pulled me to him. I adjusted my legs so they wrapped around him and now I was literally on his lap. The already short nighty slipped way up my thighs. His hands slid down to my lower back to the top of my butt. Lifting me up a little he pushed me further into him, and forced our foreheads together. He kept his lips pulled back so that we were breathing each other in, but our lips weren't touching.

"Roza, I can't fight this anymore, I have never wanted anything in my life as much as I want you. I just don't know… "Shh I put my finger against his lips, I traced them lightly as I mouthed "Then stop fighting, I reached behind me to grab one of his hands and slid it up my thigh just under the end of the nighty. His hand trembled, as did his body as I moved against him and kissed him with everything I had. He laid me onto the bed without any spot of our bodies breaking apart. He was pressing against me so hard I could feel every muscle in his body; I pushed against him grinding my body into his as the kiss we shared kept building. When he broke the kiss one hand went behind my head into my hair, wrapping around to where his thumb traced my lips. His lips still so close, but it was his other hand that currently had my attention. His hand had made its way up the fabric of my nighty to my lower abdomen. He was tracing the line along the top edge of the lace undies, and I was lost in the feeling. I moaned and his mouth attacked my lips with a new ferocity. He kissed me so hard so deep I reached up and dug my nails into his back. I didn't know how we could get any closer but I needed to find a way. It felt so good, I just wanted more and more. When I gripped the top of his jeans and fumbled with his belt buckle his breath caught and he froze for a second before he grabbed my wrists and pulled my arms over my head. He pressed down against me again and went right back to the kissing. When I tried to go for the belt again he applied a little more pressure to my wrists letting me know my hands weren't going anywhere. I was about to argue, fearful he was finding his control again. But he kissed me with the same longing he wasn't stopping or pulling back; he just wasn't letting things move forward. " I want to" I spoke into his mouth.

"I do too, but I don't want to rush things Roza. I don't want you to regret..."

" I won't" I interrupted. He sat up but pulled me with him so our faces were still only inches away from each other. He wanted to keep me close to him, and I flourished in that knowledge. He spoke quickly, with exuberance to his tone that was infectious. I felt happy right now, I had felt a lot of things lately but I don't honestly remember the last time I felt the lightness that only happiness could provide.

" Do you have any idea how I feel right now, finally letting go, finally letting myself feel this. Rose I love you."

"I love you too"

He started kissing me again it held so much I knew I could have him right then and there. It gave me this rush of power, as much as I wanted Dimitri, It never occurred to me that he might actual want me more. It was occurring to me now.

He leaned back against my headboard. I turned my back to him. Sliding slowly up his body. Lightly pressing against him as I moved up, His hands clench the tops of my thighs as I moved. He used the strength in his hands to stop me at one point, pressing me just a little harder against him as his fingers kneaded my skin. When I moved high enough that my mouth could reach his I twisted my head to the side. He leaned forward kissing me, I wiggled deeper into him. The sound that escaped his lips was actually a growl. He closed his eyes and whispered "Please Roza, I don't have the will power to fight you right now." His mouth dropped down to my throat and he started sucking on my neck. His hands slide up from my thighs and started massaging my lower abdomen as I moved against him. He rolled on top of me again. "Roza", the way it rolled off his tongue gave me chills… I knew what he wanted because I wanted it too. But at the same time I was enjoying the power that came with knowing he wanted me, I enjoyed the power of teasing him. I was suddenly not sure I was ready to give that power up. I slide out from under him slightly and he adjusted his body sitting up slightly, he moved to face me, still not ready for any space between us. The new power I was feeling from his desire blazed inside me. I leaned into his lips. " You don't want to rush things, I repeated his words back to him in his same logical tone. You want to take things slow, You want to protect my honor, my tone was a bit mocking now, and it felt good. His hand snaked into my hair and he gripped it tight into his fists controlling my head. " I do want to protect your honor" His voice was still a bit of a growl. He was definitely not in control anymore, and I was teasing him. I loved it!

"You test my fighting skills all day long Comrade, lets see how you hold up under pressure." I nearly purred the last words. I tried to move forward for the kiss but he had my hair too tight I couldn't move.

"Don't call me that!" He held my face there inches from his leaning into me and then away quickly each time I tried to begin the kiss. " You're teasing me," I was growling a little now too. "I'm teasing you? He laughed a little as he said it. Your enjoying the power you have over me. You're teasing me Roza and you know it." The smile I gave was knowing and a little devious. " You aren't the only one who can tease though, with that he took control again kissing me deeply and our bodies moved as one. He pulled out of the kiss, working his way over my throat up my neck to the edge of my ear. He kissed me softly there and whispered against my skin "oh and Roza I will protect your honor, no matter what tricks you have up your sleeve I wont sacrifice your honor we will take this slow."

"Sounds like a challenge and I do love a good challenge" I smiled and focused all my attention back into our bodies. It was funny, even without sex, it was so intimate I knew our relationship could never be the same again. We lay there together after hours of exploring each others bodies. My body felt used and triumphant as we talked and laughed enjoying each others comfort and company. At one point I glanced at the clock and realized the whole day had passed. It made me smile. I actually got a whole day to hide under the covers and I got to do it with the man I loved. I felt like I was flying. I feel asleep on top of him. I don't know if he slept at all the next thing I knew he was kissing me awake. I have to go Rose I have patrol in a couple of hours and they will have some questions if I am in the same clothes as yesterday. I hated the thought of him leaving panic set in as I wondered if he would regret the last few hours. He noticed the change in me immediately. "What s wrong."

"Nothing, I looked away,

" Really Rose after the last few hours you are going to lie to me Really? I caved he just made me weak, and he knew me so well I knew it was useless to lie anyway. " That's just it Dimitri the last few hours, what does it mean? I don't know how to go back after what we just did. It was all so intimate. I almost think sex would have been less intimate then what we did tonight. My actions always seem to disappoint you and I don't know how I am suppose to act now, so just tell me so I don't screw everything up."

" Your actions don't disappoint me rose, they infuriate me sometimes but they never disappoint me. And as for the last few hours well, it changes everything." He kissed me, and it was a soft kiss, gentle and warm. He jumped out of bed throwing his shirt over him, and with the sweetest smile I have ever been given looked at me and said I will see you soon Roza.