I came home to a very sick child. Lizzy threw up after lunch and was lethargic all afternoon. It's been going around the Centre and we did have a play date there two days ago. The good news is that it should run its course by tomorrow. The bad news is that it's going to be a very long night.

Miss Sally offered to stay with us, she hates seeing Lizzy not well, but I knew that she had to be exhausted after taking care of a sick three year old all afternoon so I told her to get some rest. I gave Lizzy a cool bath to help with her fever and then put in warm pjs. She wouldn't stay in bed so I brought her out to the living room with me and rocked her in my arms until she fell asleep. Kissing her brow, I can feel that her fever has come down and she looks much less pale than she did when I came home. My poor girl.

The buzzer sounds for the front door and I pray Lizzy doesn't wake up. Thankfully she doesn't so I place her in the corner of the sofa where she curls up and then go to see who is buzzing my apartment.

"Hello?"

"Hi Cat, it's Sid."

Shit. I forgot he was coming over tonight.

"Come on up" I say and buzz him in.

I glance at the still sleeping Lizzy, thank goodness, and then down at myself. I'm a wreck; didn't change when I got home so I'm wearing food stained work clothes, hair is in a messy bun and not the artfully arranged kind, and I'm positive I have no makeup left after giving Lizzy her bath where we both got wet. Oh well, this is motherhood and Sid will just have to realize that.

I open the door so that Sid doesn't need to knock just as he's approaching the door. He smiles widely when he sees me and then frowns as he really looks at me.

"What's wrong?" He asks.

"I'm so sorry Sid. I forgot about us getting together. Lizzy has the flu so I've frazzled and crazy busy since I got home." I point to the sofa where Lizzie lays. "Can I take a rain check? I still need to get her to bed when I'm sure her fever is gone and then I have a few messes to clean up too. I'm so sorry you had to come all this way." I feel awful now. He's so busy and his free time is precious I'm sure.

Sid leans down, kisses my cheek and then walks by me into the apartment. He strips off his shoes and jacket then rolls up his shirt sleeves.

"I'll tackle the kitchen" he says when he sees that is one of the messes "while you take care of Lizzy."

Now I'm mortified. This is supposed to be our second date and Sid is going to wash my dishes.

"Sid, I appreciate it but this really isn't necessary. I don't want to put you out. Also, you really can't afford to get sick."

Sid frowns and replies "I never catch anything and what kind of guy would I be if I just left when you could use some help? I don't know what to do with a sick child but I can wash and dry dishes." Then Sid proceeds to do just that; he cleans dishes, counters and even the floor while I tackle the bathroom, bedroom to change Lizzy's sheets, and get her medicine ready. When I walk back into living room I'm stopped in my tracks. Sitting in the rocking chair is Sid with Lizzy in his arms. She's facing him with her head resting on his chest and her arms around his neck. Her eyes are shut and Sid is kissing her brow. The sweetness of the moment squeezes at my heart. I watch Sid kiss her brow a few times and graze his fingers over her cheek. Lizzy sighs as she feels Sid's lips and fingers over her skin. I feel my eyes get wet watching them together.

Sid glances up and our eyes meet. He gives me a hesitant smile and mouths 'she woke up.' They are so sweet together, the big, tough hockey player rocking the sick three year old, that I hate to pull her away from him. I walk over and sit on the stool in front of Sid. After brushing my hand through Lizzy's hair, I lay it on Sid's hard thigh and smile up at him.

"Her fever is gone" I whisper to him.

"Good" he whispers back.

"Do you want to give her to me? She'll probably stay asleep now."

"I can take her Cat."

I nod to him and get up. Sid follows me with Lizzy to my bedroom. He lays her in her bed, pulls the covers up over her little body and kisses her cheek. When he looks at me, Sid's cheeks turn pink like he's embarrassed. How can I not fall for a guy who kisses a little girl's cheek?

I gesture for Sid to follow me and we head back to the living room. We sit on the sofa and both sigh which makes us laugh.

"Sid, thank you so much for helping out. I could have done it alone but it was so much easier with you here. I really appreciate it."

He takes my hand and brings it to his lips to kiss it softly. The gesture is very sweet and I feel the warmth radiate from my hand throughout my body.

"You're welcome Cat. Heck of a second date, huh?"

I chuckle "yeah, I guess it was."

"However will we top it for date number three?"

I look at Sid now and feel a contentment wash over me. Right now, at this moment, I'm the most content that I've ever felt in my life; holding hands with Sid and sitting in the quiet night. I guess my plan to introduce Lizzy to the relationship slowly is now out the window. I'll need to figure out how to make sure Lizzy understands, as well as she can, what's going on with Sid. Maybe I should figure it out for myself first.

Sid pulls me out of my thoughts when he asks "You must be exhausted. Do you want me to go?"

I shake my head. Sid pulls me slowly into his arms and I settle there beside him with my head on his shoulder. I lose track of how long that we sit like this in the comfortable silence. I focus on the rhythmic beat of his heart and the feel of his fingers gently stroking my arm. Afraid that I might fall asleep, I pull back slightly to look at him. Sid smiles down at me. When I reach up to brush a curl away from his forehead, he turns his head slightly to kiss my palm. I pull his head down to me so that I can kiss those beautiful lips.

This kiss is sweet and soft. I feel like I'm floating on air and the only thing grounding me is Sidney. We continue our gentle exploration without the desperation that our kisses usually become. I can feel every place where Sid's large body is touching my small one. I'm enveloped by him, everywhere.

When we do pull away, our faces stay close as we gaze into each other's eyes. I have never felt this before. It's so strange, wonderful, but strange. Sid kisses the tip of my nose which breaks the spell by my giggling. I lay back against the sofa again, in Sid's arms.

"How long has Lizzy been sick?" He asks me.

"It just started today, after lunch. Unfortunately, it's going around the Centre so the kids are passing it to each other. I thought we had escaped it but no such luck."

"You're amazing" Sid tells me.

"So are you" I reply and smile up at him. I'm surprised to see that he's frowning rather than smiling back at me.

"No Cat, you really are incredible. You're what? 21 or 22 years old? And you're raising a beautiful, happy and, except for today, healthy child. You're amazing Cat."

I'm stunned by Sid's comments. I'm so focused on my day to day and making sure that I care for Lizzy that I don't think about my effort; what I do is for Lizzy and I'd do anything for her. Miss Sally tells me I do too much but that's really different than what Sid is saying. The admiration on his face seems odd to me. I'm just a mom like so many moms I see at the Centre. I'm not unique. Sid brings me out of my thoughts again when he cups my cheek and repeats "amazing."

I really don't know what I'm seeing now in his expression. Of course it's through a haze of tears that have filled my eyes. Suddenly I feel as exhausted, truly exhausted, as I really am. No one ever focuses on me or asks me how I really am. That's ok, I don't need it; but, the simple words of acknowledgment for what I do for my daughter undoes me and I feel the tears fall down my cheeks. Sid's thumbs wipe them away.

"Did I say something wrong?" Sid asks me.

"No, I'm sorry. I think I'm so tired right now and you are so sweet ..." I don't know what else to say or how to explain myself better. I've never had anyone tell me, ever, that I'm incredible or even tell me that I'm worth anything. Sure there were a few teachers in school, when I acutally went to class, who praised me but I was never in one place long enough for it to stick. Some of my foster families were ok but none of them were ever overtly supportive. I was lucky if they made sure that I had money for lunch.

"Where have you gone?" Sid asks me and brings me back again.

"God, I'm sorry Sid. I'm a mess tonight. Maybe we should try this again another time."

He stares at me for a moment then says "have you eaten?"

Confused I say "what?"

"Have you eaten?"

I try to remember the last meal I ate and I think it was lunch.

"Ok Cat, if you have to think that hard it was a long time ago. Stay here. I saw some soup in the fridge that I'll warm up for you. Don't even try to argue" he tells me as he gets up and heads into the kitchen. "Lay down Cat" he says as he disappears into the kitchen.

For a moment I consider ignoring him and making us both some soup but, when Sid looks back to make sure I've listened to him, I follow his directions. Maybe I will close my eyes for a moment.

I don't know what came over me. Cat looked so tired when she answered the door; tired, frazzled and ready to drop. When she suggested rescheduling, I almost agreed but when I heard that Lizzy was sick, I couldn't leave. I look down at the soup heating on the stove and wonder what the hell I'm doing. Two weeks ago I wasn't even aware that Cat existed and now, tonight, I'm cleaning her house, comforting her daughter and heating up soup. What am I doing? I give my head a shake and decide to just go with it. So far, that decision has gotten me this far. Even if I don't know where this is going, I do know that I feel needed tonight in a way that I never have before. I want to take care of them; both Cat and her pixie daughter. I don't know how Cat has done it. She's so young, has worked for everything she has, worked hard, and has a wonderful daughter and life.

While the soup is still heating, I go back to the living room and Cat is asleep; sound asleep. I don't have the heart to wake her so I go back to the kitchen and put the soup back in the fridge before heading back to the living room and the sofa. I manage to shift her head onto my lap and then turn the TV on. After finding a game, I settle back to watch. My time is divided between watching the game and watching Cat sleep. She always seems so capable, so willing to take on the world and anything it can throw at her. Right now, as she sleeps, she looks so small and young. Cat sighs as I stroke her hair. I see so much of Lizzy in Cat right now that she's sleeping. It's probably more that Lizzy looks like her of course.

A goal is scored and my attention is drawn back to the game. The dichotomy of the moment isn't lost on me. I'm watching a game I play on the TV with thousands of people screaming for their supposed heroes. That's when it hits me that Cat is one of the real heroes. It reminds me of my mom. She and my dad each worked two jobs and gave up so much so that I could play hockey and have my dream. There was nothing that they wouldn't do for me. I see that exact same love and support in Cat for Lizzy. I don't think you ever really fully can understand what your parents do for you.

"Mmmm" Cat sighs and stretches.

I wait for her to wake up but she only snuggles closer. My phone vibrates. The text is from Flower asking me how my date went.

'Still here mon ami' I reply.

'Oui?'

'Yeah, her daughter is sick so I stayed to help'

'She ok?'

'Yeah, flu'

'Playing daddy huh? Shit gotta go, Stella is crying'

'Ciao'

Flower loves everything about being a father. I've always known that I'd have a family but watching Flower with Stella has made me think of it a lot recently. Of course Tanger also has a kid now and I've always spent time with Duper's kids. Getting to know Lizzy has taken on a different meaning than simply meeting one of the kids who come to the game. I connected right away to the little pixie; she had my heart immediately. Glancing down at Cat sleeping and I know that Lizzy's mom isn't far behind.

Wow, I need to get a grip. This is only our second date and we're still getting to know each other. I need to make sure that I give Cat time. She's probably been through so much and works so hard to take care of Lizzy. She puts on a brave face and is always so positive but tonight I can see just how much it wears on her.

"Hmm" Cat stretches again and rolls onto her back and looks up at me. "Oh God Sid. I'm so sorry. I fell asleep huh?"

I brush her hair back from her face and reply "yeah, you did. That's ok Cat. You don't need to apologize. I completely understand."

She runs her hand through her hair and smiles up at me.

"I don't usually fall asleep on guests."

"Guests?"

"Well, dates."

I chuckle. "I'll try not to take it personally."

Cat smiles back at me. "Has Lizzy woken up?"

I shake my head. "She's been as quiet as you have. Not a peep for the last two hours."

"Two hours? Holy crap, I've been asleep for two hours? I'm really so sorry Sid."

"Cat, it's ok, really. I don't know how you do it. Between the hours you work and taking care of a three year old. I hope you don't mind me asking this but don't you have any family that can help you?"

Cat immediately stiffens and sits up. I can tell that she's pulled back and not only physically.

"Um, no, I don't have any family."

"I'm sorry Cat. I really didn't mean to pry."

"It's fine Sid. Please stop apologizing. Is that a Canadian thing?"

Confused, I ask "is what a Canadian thing?"

"Apologizing all the time? I appreciate it but it's not necessary Sid. I only knew my mother and she went to jail when I was nine. I went into foster care after that."

She shrugs and then goes into the kitchen. Wow, I really put my foot in it that time.

"You're probably going to yell at me but I am sorry to bring that up" I say as I follow her into the kitchen.

"I won't yell at you" she says with a smile. "You didn't know Sid and, besides, it's behind me now, I got through it and I'm only looking forward. Would you like a drink?" She asks and hands me a bottle of water.

"Thanks" I say as I take the bottle. How does she stay so positive with everything that she's been through? It's even more stuff than I knew. I don't know how she's done it without any support from family.

"I'm just going to check on Lizzy" she says.

I sit back on the sofa and sip at my water. We definitely need to change the subject even though I'm dying to hear more about her life.

"She might just be unconscious she sleeping so soundly."

I chuckle as Cat says this before dropping on the sofa beside me.

"She was really tired I guess" I reply.

We both sit in awkward silence now and it reminds me that we really haven't had any awkwardness between us; until now. Hearing about the foster thing brings up a million questions that I want to ask. The one that keeps coming to my mind: where is Lizzy's father? Why didn't he help her and take care of his child?

"Sid, I'm sorry if I was rude earlier."

"Now you're the one giving unnecessary apologies."

Cat chuckles and says "ok, fine. I'm not sorry."

"Cat, I want to know you better. That's why I asked about your past. I don't want to pry, really. You'll tell me more when you're ready."

Cat is silent again and I begin to worry.

"Sid, I don't like to look back, that's all it is. I can't change the past so I move forward. Let's just say that we don't have family, neither Lizzy nor I, except for Miss Sally of course."

I'm taken back by her fierce speech; especially by just how fierce she said it. Currently there is a big stop sign on her forehead saying 'don't go there again.'

"Ok, I get it" I tell her. This evening has been really different than I thought it would be. First, there was pitching in to help with Lizzy; not that I minded a And this is the first time that I've seen Cat be anything but positive.

"Maybe I should get going" I tell her and stand up. "You must be exhausted."

"To be honest, I really am" and she chuckles.

We get up and walk to the door. After I put on my coat and shoes, I turn to Cat. She looks tired but smiles at me. I go with instinct again and open my arms. Cat steps closer and wraps her arms around my waist. I hold her close and rest my chin on the top of her head then sigh. It may not have been the kind of date I intended but it's ending well and I learned a lot about Cat; including how much more I want to know.