A/n here's the next chapter. Thanks again to all my faithful readers. You guys are the best.
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The Silver Pines Fertility Clinic looked very innocent from the outside. It was built from red brick and steel. White pine and Scotch pines surrounded the two story building. The grass that had been green during the summer months was now turning golden-yellow.
The wind was blowing, and white clouds were scuttling across the blue sky, when Emily got out of the car she'd parked in a space next to the handicapped space. She looked at the building for a minute before walking up the concrete sidewalk to the front door.
There were several people in the waiting room. Some of the women that were waiting, were obviously pregnant, and this sent Emily's heartbeat into overdrive. For a minute she thought seriously about turning around and running away from there as fast as she could. She didn't need to be here. It was a crazy idea that would never work. She'd just leave and -
The girl working at the desk looked up and smiled widely with brilliant white teeth. "May I help you?"
You can't run now!
"Um… yeah… My name," her voice cracked and she had to clear her throat while her face went hot. "I'm Emily Prentiss."
The girl smiled again in the same way you might smile to reassure someone that might bolt at any second. She held out a clipboard and Emily felt no choice but to cross the distance and take if from her.
"Pleas sign in and fill out these forms."
She showed Emily that the white, blue and yellow pages needed to be filled out completely and the last white page signed and initialed.
"There's no end to paperwork." Emily mumbled and the girl smiled again as though indulging her.
"You can take a seat right over there," She pointed with her perfectly polished red fingernail.
Emily obediently 'took a seat' and began reading over the forms she had to fill out. Why do you have to regurgitate your whole life and medical history every time you see a new doctor?
She picked up the pen that was attached to the clipboard by a thin chain. It was a list of questions that was the same on any medical questionnaire she filled out over her lifetime till she got to the back of the second page.
Her head began to spin and her mouth went dry. Her heart was pumping so fast that it felt like a hummingbird trying to burst out of her chest. The edges around her eyes went gray and she bit down on her tongue to keep from fainting. The taste of copper blood in her mouth and the pain brought the world back into focus. She looked up from under her bangs, but no one seemed to notice her distress. She dropped the pen and it swung back and forth on the end of the chain. She watched it swing and ignored the questionnaire till a male voice from her right caught her attention.
"… Honey, it's going to work this time."
"We don't know that!"
She looked up and saw a young man with light blond hair and grey eyes talking to a woman with dark brown hair. She was turned toward the man so that Emily couldn't see her face, but her posture spoke volumes without words.
"It's going to be okay." He promised her and kissed her head.
"I just want this to be the last time."
"It will be! We have to have faith."
Emily went back to the list of questions and finished filling them out with a trembling hand. The couple next to her had suffered disappointment in this quest to have a child. They were continuing on. She had to do the same thing, no matter what it took.
Her hand was steady as a rock when she took the clipboard back to the receptionist. The young blond woman with green eyes smiled up and she and then her smiled faltered a bit. "You don't look well ma'am! Can I get you a glass of water?"
"No! Um, I mean yeah, that would be great."
She went back to her chair and sat down. She looked at the magazine on the table in front of the chairs, but didn't pick it up. The receptionist brought a paper cup shaped like a cone to her. "Are you sure you're okay ma'am."
"Yes thank you."
"Okay, the doctor will be with you in a minute."
It was twenty minutes before her name was called by a nurse with black hair and Asian features. She spoke with a quiet voice and her hand was gentle on Emily's arm as she guided her to the examination room. She took the same stats that Rocky had at Dr. St. Johns office. Her blood pressure was higher than what was normal for her, but not high enough to cause comment from the nurse. Her temperature was normal and her pulse the same as was normal for her.
"The doctor will be in here soon."
Why do nurses say that and then you wait another twenty minutes?
In reality, it was only two minutes before the doctor came into the room. He was tall, about three inches taller than Reid she judged. His hair was perfectly combed with a part at the left side. It was jet black and his eyes were brown. His skin was lightly tanned. He wore a charcoal grey suit under his white lab coat. His tie was dark blue with silver grey diagonal stripes. The shirt he wore matched the blue of the tie. He had a gold signet ring on his right pinky and a plain gold wedding band on his left hand.
"Hello Miss Prentiss… I'm Dr. Steven Kelly.
"It's nice to meet you."
"Dr. St. John tells me you're considering becoming pregnant."
"Yes… I'm not getting any younger and well - I just don't see marriage in my future, or any long term relationship."
"I have had many single women in their late thirties that come to me with those same concerns. We'll do everything we can to make this successful for you."
"Thank you doctor," She said.
"Now, I do have a concern. As you know, I went to medical school with Dr. St. John and I trust her judgment."
"I'm glad," Emily was a little taken aback at the sudden change in the doctor's tone."
"What I mean to say," He said, taking a seat in the chair across from where Emily sat. "Is that I get confused when a patient doesn't disclose the answers to questions vital to our consultation."
Emily looked at her hands and the doctor waited in silence till she looked up. He didn't look mad, instead he looked intensely concerned. "If we're going to succeed, I need you to be honest with me."
"I'm sorry… It was just a difficult thing to remember. I hadn't thought about my baby for a very long time. I know that sounds very callous, but I was seventeen at the time. My mother was so angry. She thought I was ruining my life. The baby had the cord wrapped around her neck. I didn't see the doctor like I was supposed to and…" Tears began despite biting the inside of her mouth to stop them. "I'm sorry."
"You don't have to apologize, Ms. Prentiss. You were so young. It's only natural that it's a painful memory for you."
"It was my fault."
"Why do you say that?" He asked while writing on her chart.
"I was stupid and didn't go to the doctor till it was too late. I was trying to hide the pregnancy from my parents. I didn't think that I could hurt the baby. Maybe I didn't care…"
"I'm so sorry." He said, and didn't attempt to excuse her behavior which reassured her in an odd sort of way. She accepted a white handkerchief from the doctor. "You're an adult Agent Prentiss. This time you're going to do everything you need to do to have a healthy baby.
"Yes I will. I'll do what ever I have to do. I'll do whatever you tell me to do. I want this baby so much."
"Then let's get started."
They went over the options that were available to Emily. She listened and tried to ask intelligent questions. When the doctor finished explaining the difference between in-vitro fertilization and artificial insemination, she felt relaxed and excited about the process.
"Now, artificial insemination is usually recommended for single women. It's cheaper than in-vitro and the donors are usually anonymous."
"I have someone in mind to be a donor."
"Okay, I'll need to see him too."
"I haven't asked him yet. I wanted to be sure that I could conceive safely."
"I'll be able to tell you that after some blood tests. I need to get a look at your hormone levels. We'll also do the RH test."
"I'm RH negative."
"Then I'll confirm it and test your donor too. If he's RH negative, it won't be a problem. If he is, we'll deal with it including giving you Anti D shots if necessary."
"Okay - where do I go for the tests?"
"We have a lab here, but before I send you there I want to impose several restrictions on you."
"Okay…"
"You have a dangerous and stressful job. Your age, and your stress levels could be detrimental to the baby. I'm going to be watching you very closely. If I tell you to go on leave from your job, you'll do it immediately. If I tell you not to travel or reduce your stress, I need you to do it immediately. Is that understood?"
"Yes, I understand."
"Good, make sure you tell your boss what you're doing so he can make sure that leave is approved with your HR department if you need it."
"I will."
"When you've talked to your friend about being your donor, call and make an appointment. We can do donation and testing here. He'll have to be tested for all STDs and HIV. Normally, a sperm sample would be frozen for six months to rule out HIV."
"That won't be necessary Doctor."
"Why not?" He asked his eyebrows had lifted into his hair.
"I'd prefer to let him explain that to you."
"Alright, "He said. "Now, let's get you down to the lab."
---
Emily picked up her phone and dialed the familiar number before her nerves could get the better of her.
"Reid," A distracted voice floated out to her and she swallowed very hard.
"Reid, its Emily," Her voice cracked again and she winced at the way it sounded like Reid.
"Hi Emily, Um… What did you need?"
"Would you meet me at park next to the city library in twenty minutes?"
He was quiet for so long that she was about to call his name when he said, "Why?"
"I just need to talk to you. Can you please meet me? I'll buy you a cup of coffee."
"Okay."
He hung and she went to her car. It was Saturday morning, just before lunch and they were actually off for the weekend. Two days had passed since she'd seen her doctor. Just that morning the nurse had called to say that her tests indicated that she would be able to conceive after a course of medication to stimulate egg production.
She went over the details of that conversation in her head over and over again while driving to Starbucks. She had just enough time to get Reid's favorite drink and make it back to the park. In fact, she was parking just as his ancient Volvo pulled into the parking lot.
"Hi Emily, "He greeted her with a shy smile.
Oh God! This was going to be more difficult then she imagined.
