Hey before I forget it, all rights of the characters to Stephanie Meyer.

Chapter 8

Edwards point of view

I wasn't sitting in the meadow for very long when I smelled her. She came to this place. I wanted to run in her direction but I stayed there. I know, when she's coming to talk to me, I needed to be patient.

Than she came to the last trees till the meadow. There she stopped. She looked at me, and I turned myself in her direction. I was still sitting, I didn't want to disturb her, it must be very hard for her to talk to me. But I knew I needed to explain.

"Bella, I'm really happy that you came here, I wasn't expecting that. So I thank you very much. I really will explain myself. You know, I didn't left you because I didn't love you anymore. That was the blackest blasphemy. I loved you the moment I saw you, even I didn't know it then, I loved you every minute since I saw you, every second. You're my life, my everything. The last hundred years were like hell, I always wanted to go back and to kiss you again. But I couldn't because I thought I need to save you. After the birthday I thought that it would be best to leave you because you could be save again, I was a permanent threat to you. I wanted you to have a happy human life, I couldn't give you that. But it was all meaningless. I'm sorry."

She didn't react, I just hoped that she understand. She must understand that I love her. But than she finally moved in my direction. She just came some steps close but this made my hope raise, perhaps she understood me. I really wanted to know what she was thinking, as always. "What are you thinking?"

"I don't know really, this is all very much, I mean I needed a lot of time to forget the pain, and now everything shall be meaningless? Everything was just wasted time? I don't know if I can believe this."

"I know it is hard, but please trust me. I love you."

"That's not the fact, I trust you, I always did even when I shouldn't. And I believe you, I don't think that you're lying. If I thought that I would have bring Antoine with me."

"I don't understand?"

"Oh, his ability is to sense when somebody is lying, but I don't think that you'll lye to me." I really didn't deserve her to be that trustful. But I there was one more thing that was unsaid, Antoine. I needed to know.

"Oh, yeah, Antoine, I really won't disturb your relationship, I don't want to cause you any troubles." Than she made two more steps in my direction.

"It's not like that, I was friend with his mother when she got killed by a Vampire, he was her son and he got bitten. So I helped him through the first years and he stayed with me, he is like a son to me." A huge flash of relieve flow through my body. She wasn't in love with him, so there was still the chance that she could forgive me and come back to me, even if this chance was very little.

"Oh I thought you both were, well you know…." I couldn't speak it out loud. But than she came some steps closer to me.

"I really want you to trust me, I'll never leave you again, I promise you that. The reasons for leaving you are not that I was bored by you, and not because I didn't love you anymore. I love you, I just wanted to make the right thing, I waned you to have a human life, but that didn't work out right?" I tried to smile at least a bit. But she came some steps further to me. And now I was smiling widely. Than she started to speak again.

"Well, I like it to be a Vampire, I never wanted a human life, you know that, but it's just that…" She stopped for a moment, I had the feeling she needed to force herself to speak it, but she came some steps closer, now she was nearly next me, and she sat down. The scent that was coming from her was overwhelming. Not as before, I didn't want to drink her blood, it was another feeling. Like the passion was flooding through my body. I wanted to kiss her, to hug her, to hold her tight. But she started to speak again."…well I just wanted it to be you, always you, I wanted you to turn me, you know that, I wanted you to help me into this life. But I was alone…" Now I really wanted to hug her tightly. But I decided to give her more time, she needed to get used to me again. "Bella, I didn't want to turn you because I thought you would loose your soul, but you definitely haven't lost it. I was wrong. But perhaps you understand now that it was hard for me to believe this. And I really would wanted you to help through the time, I wanted to be near you, to help, to be with you every second. You need to tell me everything you experienced. Who you met, where you was, what you have done. I want to know everything, and I want to be near to you, if you want." During I spoke I stood up, I walked up and down and tried to explain it as best as possible. During the last words I sat down again, but this time a little bit closer to her than before, I hope it didn't bother her. The whole time I couldn't look at her because I feared what I would se, but now I looked into her eyes, she was looking on the ground so I couldn't see them so good but I saw that they changed. They weren't that smooth anymore. And they were softer. I wanted to explore them more, so I asked, "Bella? Would you plese look at me?" And so she did. She looked in my eyes and happiness flowed my body. They were really softer, perhaps she believed me! I got even a little bit closer to her, but as hard as I tried to find out what she is thinking, I couldn't.

"Tell me what you think, please." I asked her. "I was just wondering what you have done the past years." "Oh, nothing special, well I left my family for a long time, I could feel that they don't like the zombie Edward, and I needed to chase Victoria, and caught her, but too late actually. But most o he time I was lying somewhere and felt empty, or I lived like an animal for some years, it was relaxing through, because you don't think that much. Of course I still remembered you but I needed to think about you with another man, and I wasn't that man. But I don't complain, after all that was all I wanted, to let you live a normal life, and now I perhaps get a chance to be this man, so I needn't to complain." I looked closely into her eyes to see her reaction to what I said. Would she give me a second chance? I know I don't deserve it, but I was still hoping.

"Yes, perhaps you can be this man." When I would have still a heart, it would be racing like a Ferrari. She really gave me one more chance. Could I risk hugging her? Would this be too much for her? But the desire was strong. I came closer to her, being very patient, but her eyes encouraged me, she looked so lovely. I wanted to kiss her, I needed to kiss her. She was so lovely, she was the love of my life, I wouldn't let her go once more. She was my life. The desire was about to take my body under control, I wanted to hold her tight, to be close to her to feel her skin on mine, to feel her lips on mine, I wouldn't need to be careful, it wasn't that easy anymore to hurt her. I could let myself be, just like I am. I inhaled her scent, this exclusive scent. I was now about to close my eyes and kiss her, but I wanted to look into his eyes once more to be sure was ok with that. I looked closely in her eyes, and they said me it was ok. Than she inhaled my scent as well. And suddenly something in her eyes changed, they got hard again. Something was absolutely wrong. Within a millisecond she grabbed my arm and pulled me into the forest in the direction of the house, she was fast, and I somehow knew that we needed to be fast, but I was faster, so I put her on my back to be faster. Even if she was in great fear, and I was too because she was, I was so excited when she touched me. When she grabbed my arm a huge wave of electricity flowed my body. It was the first touch wit her for more than I hundred years. It was so great, I would never unclasp her again. She was just so wonderful. But when I saw the house I came back to reality. She had fear and I didn't know why, I needed to find out. And I needed to take that fear away from her.

So everyone, I just finished that chapter and I think the next will take some time, because next Monday will be my final exam in math and I really need to study, and on Tuesday will be my french exam, but than I'm finish, so I will write hopefully very fast. And I got really encouraged by my first review, so please review=)