Chapter 61

A Glimpse of Perfection

In one single moment, she saw with a clarity that blinded her, her entire reason for being. Her reason for being created, for existing; it hadn't been to be a soldier, a science experiment and it hadn't been to lead others like her to freedom. No…

With the sounds of the fire crackling and dying feet away, the feel of Logan's chest rising and falling beneath her cheek, his breath upon her hair, Cale's upon her face, she realized this is what she had been meant for.

She couldn't fall asleep like they had and it wasn't for the fact that one wrong move could send her falling off the couch where she lay against Logan's side and their son on his chest. She couldn't let this feeling pass her by, the feelings that had grown all day long.

They'd decided to go into town shortly after their walk after proving her reflexes weren't so quick when she was distracted. The milk, they'd gone in to pour for Cale had hit the floor in the kitchen soaking hers and Logan's feet before they even realized they'd bumped into it.

They'd played in the park for less than a half an hour, managing to keep their attention properly focused on their son. Of course that hadn't been too hard consider the paltry selection of equipment they had. The swings were the only decent option for a two year old, Max wasn't about to risk finding out how much Manticore existed in him at this young age on anything else. So they'd swung, Logan pushed Cale in the baby swing as Max swung beside him.

They'd left the car and walked over to the grocers with Cale resting on Logan's side, his other arm draped across Max's shoulders. They had always presented the image of a family; they had always been a family. Since before the day they'd run into Bennett and Clemente. There was something though in actually feeling his skin against her own…It shouldn't have mattered, but it did. Knowing that as others looked at them, what they saw was actually the complete and total truth.

She was his; he was hers in everyway possible.

That slow sense of peace and perfection had stayed with them as Cale had dropped off on the ride back to the cabin. Max had carried him in as Logan brought in the groceries. They'd met back up in the living room before slowly making their way into the bedroom. Intensity, passion, need…those had driven their first time together, the second was more playful or at least it began that way, it had been able to because their first time was over, all those years of waiting, of wondering, of thinking it would never happen….It had, so they could just be themselves, just be in the moment, not be driven by anything else, besides what was going on in the here and now.

She didn't know what exactly had driven them that third time, family, peace, the utter perfection of what they were when they were together…It had been slow and tender, as if they were giving their minds the chance to absorb every single touch, taste, feel…Savored like one of Logan's pre-pulse wines. They had fallen asleep together, wrapped in each other's arms, covered by the soft red blanket that had been knocked off the bed several times during the day. Awoken by their son seeking them out after his nap, the door left open exactly for that reason. He'd crawled into bed with them and they'd stayed that way for a few minutes, just being.

They went back to their day after that, playing with Cale, making dinner. She didn't regret having to do those things. Once upon a time she might have thought she'd want to go the straight 27 hours with Logan in bed, but the simple things had been what she'd wanted. Leaning back into his arms as they sat on the floor with Cale, the soft kisses that would pass between them, just the feel of their arms touching as they moved. Those had been the things she'd wanted…

"Mhmm" Logan murmured and stretched out, his eyes focused downward taking in the scene, "How long have I been out?" he asked.

"Not long."

"Want to put him to bed?" He asked

"In a few." She needed awhile longer to savor this.

-o-o-o-

Silence stole over them once more. Giving him another chance to just feel, to reflect. He hadn't expected this. Not in all of his thoughts or dreams about being with Max had he expected this. He'd expected making love with her to be overwhelming, he expected it to surpass everything else. He'd dreamed about what it would feel like to actually feel her hand within his as they walked, to just randomly kiss her throughout the day, make dinner with her constantly pilfering, hands being lightly smacked. Putting it all together though…

How she'd just wanted to lay there on the couch after Cale had fallen asleep. The conversation about nothing important that had followed on that very same couch after they'd put Cale down, soft touches and kisses as they spoke… Taking a bath with Max, the laughter that had resulted from the bubbles she hadn't been aware the bath was capable of creating, the feel of her body underwater, the taste and feel of her mouth and skin, the wet strands of hair beneath his touch… No, he hadn't been prepared for any of it. Not the feel of the sheets still slightly damp, not the way the room was softly lit by the lamp next to the bed, not the soft talk that occasionally passed between them.

She rose up to study him, bracing herself on a bent arm, examining the gently lit face of the man she loved. For almost three years, she had been looking at, dreaming of this face, "Who are you?" she asked as the question came to mind.

He looked puzzled by her words, wondering if any of those clever replies about clones or who exactly she thought she'd spent the past 17 hours with that ran through his mind should be voiced.

She noticed his confusion, "You're not the guy who tried to guilt me into saving the world, you're not the guy I fell in love with, you aren't even the guy I came home too." The imprint of who he was, was the same, the basics hadn't changed, but he had.

She watched his eyes, she watched as thoughts ran through them as he went through hundreds of different things to say, she didn't expect the words that finally came, "You were still there."

Her lips pouted in puzzlement.

"I drove you away, I pushed you away, you died in my arms, hell you even left me for another guy, but you were still there."

A soft smile graced her lips, she wondered if she understood fully, if it was the freedom that came with love or the peace that came when you knew the person you loved would always be by your side, would always love you in return, she didn't want to ask though, she didn't want to change his words. Whatever they had meant, they touched something deep within her, just like his poem. Simple words, simple words to explain the most complex yet simplest thing there was, love.

"I love you," she whispered dropping down for a kiss.

"I love you too." He replied, not for the first time today.

-o-o-o-

"That whole me leaving you for Alec thing" she said sometime later.

"Do we really need to discuss that?" his voice was muffled against her throat, buried by her hair.

She chuckled, "You totally placed more importance on it than me dying."

He laughed moving over her, "You had no say in dying…you left me for Alec."

"Can I remind you, I never actually touched Alec and it was your own sick and twisted imagination that created even the idea of me and Alec."

His darkened eyes were over hers, "We're really not discussing Alec now."

She let out a small laugh along with a smile, "Sorry."

His lips returned to their task and moved down her body.

"Seriously though, me with Alec was"

He cut her off before she could even finish, her hands went back into his hair and she forgot about everything else besides from him.

Hmm, you know there are moments even I have issues with the pg-13 thing or T or K or whatever the hell it is on this site…My original thoughts flew straight past R and onto NC-17.