Disclaimer: I sadly don't own any characters. but I do own the plot! =)


alice: *looking at a magazine* OMGH I NEED THESE SHOES!!!

edward: alice dont you have enough shoes?

alice: no i dont have enough...OMGH I WANT THAT SKIRT!!!

jasper: look baby i think that eddy is right... and that skirt is ugly girlfriend *says in a gay voice*

alice: yeah i guess....AHHHH! I HAVE TO HAVE THAT BRACELET! * starts jumping up and down on the couch and hyperventalating*

jasper: honey.... *grabs the magazine and throws it*

edward: hahaha....OMG THESE BOOTS ARE CUTE!

alice: are you getting those for Bella?

edward: GURL NAW THESE ARE FOR ME

bella: hahaha i didnt like them anyway*grabs edward's hand and holds it*

emmett: ohh those shoes are hot!

edward: ugh! they're so not! and bella you just dont have taste

bella: ugh! *scoots down a couch cusion* now what, you want me to buy a thong? oh yeah i have no taste, i guess you think i dress ugly then

edward: oh can you please? i want a blue scented one with rhinestones on it!

bella: edward, why would you want that?

edward: i want to wear it around the house

bella: no i dont want you to have that girlie thing on.. im leaving

edward:NO BUY US BOTH SOME AND WE WILL WEAR THEM ON OUR HONEYMOON

bella: we already had our honeymoon and you want want to get those rhinestones stuck in your butt

edward: *in a singsong voice* but its scented and we can have another one

bella: i dont know edward your being all OMGH girlie on me

edward: i know!

bella: *walks towards the door*

edward: DONT LEAVE ME!

bella: calm down hun im just going to check on nessie and Jasper STOP PUTTING THOSE GIRLIE PILLS IN HIS DRINKS!

jasper: sorry bella, but that as funny

bella:*goes and hits jasper*

jasper: *starts crying* i said i was sorry *tear tear*

bella: dont cry, because i cry....whenever someone else....cries * falls to her knees and cries*

edward: jasper stop making my wife cry!

rosalie: and the pills have worn off

alice: i told you!

emmett: edward's about to kick jasper's..

esme: dont even finish that sentence MR!

*bella still crying*

edward:JASPER WHAT THE HELL DID YOU PUT IN MY DRINK?! IM GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!

emmett: hehehehehe kick his ass edward

alice: kick his and i'll kick yours *stands up with her tiny fist in the air*

Bella: why cant everbody just be happy?! *still crying*

rosalie: SHUT UP YOU RETARDED HUMAN!

emmett: babe there's no human in here..

edward: so shut the hell up!

rosalie:WHO DO YOU THINK YOU'RE TALKING TO?!

Bella: *snaps out of it* WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE TALKING TO MY MAN LIKE THAT?!

emmett: dont talk to rose like that or i'll kick your ass (a/n: srry for the cussin...)

bella: oh whatever emmett. if i can beat you at arm wrestling, then i can easily kick your ass

edward:hun i dont want you to be in this i want you safe *lightly kisses her*

*emmett does the same to rosalie*

bella: fine..im bored now

edward: lets get it on! *gets in his hunting crouch*

bella: oo you bad boy!

edward: *winks* you will feel retarded for saying that when we are alone..

bella: *runs upstairs*

edward: *smiles* i get to go have fun.. got to go!

alice:TMI!

edward:hehehehehe * runs upstairs like a little kid*

emmett: he left because he is a weakling

edward: I HEARD THAT BUT YOU AINT WORTH IT BELLA IS WAY BETTER THAN YOU!

bella: oh my sexy man! starts kissing him again*

*MEANWHILE*

emmett: wanna have a pixie stix eating contest?

alice: YES!YES! *jumping up and down*

jasper: *graps the pixie stixs* no alice you know what they do to you.

alice: WELL OH WELL NOW GIVE THEM TO ME BEFORE I DO DAMAGE! *snatches one and pours it in her mouth*

rosalie: NO! you're not supposed to eat it you're supposed to sniff it * snorts it up her nose*

jasper: um rose i dont think you're supposed to do that...

rosalie: SHUT UP JASPER I KNOW WHAT IM DOING! *continues to snort it up her nose*

* bella and edward walk back in the room*

bella: hey guys...rose what are you doing with that pixie stix...?

rosalie: what does it look like im doing?

bella: rose you're supposed to eat it....

rosalie: nun-uh! * a pixie stix commercial comes on with a little boy eating pixie stixs*

bella: look *points to the tv* see!

rosalie: *starts crying uncontrollably and runs upstairs* I SAW IT ON COPS! *slams the door*

*awkward silence*

emmett: so much for the pixie stix eating contest...

edward: how about a ccp eating contest?

everbody: NO!!!


this is the end of this chapter. i hope you enjoyed it,but its not as funny as the next chapter coming up so plz review =) I also wanna thank my bestest friend edwardawsome (profile name on fanpop) for helping me write this story and I enjoyed writing with her =) anyway, click the review button!