Some of the things that Sam did to deal with the past in my old story will be the same in this story.
Sam found herself between her parents when she woke up. They were both still thoroughly asleep. Sam thought it best to leave before they woke up because she didn't want to face them together after her breakdown yesterday. She grabbed her cellphone that was on Brooke's bedside and headed back to her bedroom quietly. As she looked through her phone she found a text from Sawyer.
'Damn. I missed her text' she thought to herself
The text was from last night and it read: "There's a party on Friday for all the future cheerleaders. My parents are definitely not gonna let me go. What should I do?
Sam sighed, she had too much on her mind to be dealing with this as well, but it was Sawyer, and she loved her like a sister. This party meant trouble, she already knew it. It was the cheerleader's way of "initiating" the girls that had made it in. They would provide an amazing amount of alcohol and watch the freshmen get drunk, for many, for the first time. And for Sawyer it would be the first time. Sam was set on talking her out of going to this party.
She put the phone down and got ready for school, it was early, but she wanted to get out of her house before Brooke or Julian had the chance to "talk" to her. Sam threw on her clothes. She wore dark brown corduroy bermuda shorts that reached her midthigh and a red plaid loose shirt. Her converse were old and raggedy and her black socks went a good amount beyond her ankle. She went to the kitchen and cringed slightly when she saw her mom already awake making coffee. Brooke took one look at Sam and just rolled her eyes and chuckled. Sam's style was so relaxed, but she made it look perfect.
"Sam could you ever-"
"No I can't. I like my clothes, thank you very much. Could you ever tone down the fashionista Brooke? It's a tad unbecoming for a woman your age." Sam smiled, proud of her comeback.
Brooke frowned and threw an apple slice at her. Sam dodged it, "are your eyes aging too?" she laughed.
Brooke narrowed her eyes, "shut it hormonal teenager. At least I don't have to worry about zits and boys"
Sam frowned, "Not cool."
"You started it squirt….Now come sit here" she pointed to the stool across from her, on the other side of the counter.
Sam was hesitant, "umm I kinda want to get to school early today"
Brooke knew she was avoiding talking about yesterday, her voice changed to a more authoritative tone. "Samantha. Don't lie to me. We're going to talk about yesterday whether you like it or not."
Sam sighed and trudged her way to the stool, "Mom I don't wanna"
Brooke put a hand up in front to stop her, but her voice was gentle, "Sam I need to know why you were so angry yesterday. You can tell me anything, remember? That was our promise when you first came to this house?"
Sam did remember, it was two years ago that Brooke and Julian took her in. They accepted her exactly as she was. She looked down at her hands, noticing their every detail, then she saw her mom's hands cover hers. Sam looked up and bit her lip, she paused a moment "…I found out about my mom at school. She sent a note and I got it right before I left to go to the car. I'm, I'm really sorry for yelling mom. I just. I don't know"
Brooke squeezed her hands, mentally wanting to strangle Sam's birth mother,
"no, no. It's okay. You had a reason to be angry. And I don't want you having anything to do with that woman. Got it?
"Yeah. I promise." Sam said quietly
"and Sam you need to learn to control your emotions. You know that's Dr. Gold's biggest concern."
Sam pulled her hands away. She hated it when Brooke talked about Dr. Gold, "why do you have to bring the damn shrink up! I'm not crazy! I only go every three months, it's not like every week!"
"HEY!" Brooke yelled louder than she expected. In a calmer voice she continued, "I'm just trying to make a point Sam. I don't think you're crazy."
Sam just glared at her, "Whatever. Like I said, I'm sorry…Look I have to go. Tell Julian I said bye."
Brooke felt like she had lost a battle, even though they really weren't in a war, "Fine. Can I at least get a kiss?"
Sam smiled weakly. Brooke always had a way of ending their arguments on a semi-good note. She hated it and she loved it at the same time. She wanted to be angry with Brooke, but she just couldn't. She relented and kissed her on the cheek,
"Bye mom. Have a nice day, I guess"
Brooke grinned and took the opportunity to pull Sam in for a hug, "Bye baby. I love you."
She made her way out, skating her way to school.
… … … … … … …
Sawyer found Sam by the bleachers, hanging out with some of her "weird" friends as Sawyer called them. They were the rejects of the school. Both Sam and Jack were comfortable around them. Sawyer cautiously walked up to them and stuck to Sam's side, she grabbed her arm,
"Sam. Come on. I have to talk to you." She whispered
"alright fine. Let's go" Sam said a bit too serious for Sawyer's taste
They walked to Sawyer's locker, "Hey Sam is something up?" Sawyer asked quizzically
Sam shrugged her shoulders, "Just a lot on my mind…my birth mom found me."
Her eyes widened, "Sam! Just ignore her. Your parents are Aunt Brooke and Julian. Screw her."
Sam looked down and back up again, "I know that. But she's still my mom, you know?"
"So? It's not like she did anything for you."
Sam stayed quiet. Sawyer didn't get it. When your mom tells you she doesn't want you at age 4 (almost 5), and finally gives you the chance to get to know her at 14. There's a certain sense of curiosity, an almost needy curiosity.
"Sam, don't tell me you actually replied to her."
"Well…I kinda sent her a text this morning. She wants to meet with me after school." Sam paused and she grabbed Sawyer's arm, "Please don't tell my mom! Please don't Sawyer, don't tell your mom either. Or anyone. "
Sawyer could tell she was desperate, "Sam what if something bad happens?"
Sam got frustrated, "Damn it Sawyer! What the hell do you think she's gonna do? Kidnap me?! I'll be fine. Are you gonna cover me after school or not?"
"Ugh. Fine!" she sighed
Sam grinned, "Perfect…now about the party"
Sawyer's disposition brightened at mention of the party, "I have to sneak out. I've never done that before."
"Sawyer that party's going to be stupid. They just want to get all you freshmen cheerleaders drunk. Rachael told me about it the other day."
"Who the hell is Rachael?! She's a part of that reject group Sam. What does she know!? I NEED to go to this party."
Sam was going to say something, but was interrupted by the bell, they made their way to Haley's classroom, "Who cares what she is. She knows what she's talking about. And-"
They both stopped as they saw Haley smiling at them.
"You two look suspicious." Haley said
"It's nothing." They said in unison.
Haley didn't believe them but sent them both off to their desks with a smack to their backside, "Ow. Aunt Haley!" Sawyer said blushing.
"You girls better not be hiding anything." She said as she turned towards her desk.
They said nothing. As the rest of the class filed in they continued their conversation,
"Sawyer I'll go to the party with you, I don't want you to do anything stupid. I'll be your plus one or something. Tell your mom you're spending the night with me on Friday. We'll go from there."
Sawyer smiled, "awesome!" but a second later she felt a pang of guilt. She brushed it off trying to focus on Haley's lesson.
… … … … … … …
Sam waited anxiously for the final bell to ring. When she finally heard it she bolted out the door and headed toward the diner.
She opened the door and found her birth mom sitting in the corner booth. She looked up and saw Sam, she smile warmly. Instantly Sam put her guard up and steeled herself as she sat across from her.
"Hey" Sam said quietly
"Hey Sammy thanks for coming."
"It's just Sam, not Sammy, not sweetie. Just Sam. And you're welcome, I guess."
She chuckled, "Alright…Sam. You always were a difficult baby."
Sam looked up at her comment, "You, you remembered what I was like?" she stammered.
"Of course! You were the cutest little thing. You were so smart for your age." She said reminiscing
Sam frowned, "You mean when Child services would come and I knew when to stay quiet and when to talk. Or when your druggies would come and I would stay in our room for hours with a bowl of cereal for dinner, while you got drugged up out of your mind. I was just fucking four years old."
Rebecca felt ashamed, "Sam. I'm not like that anymore. I've cleaned myself up since then. When I was working here I was just getting better, now I have a good, stable job. I want to spend more time with you. Be a part of your life."
Sam tensed and tried to appear rock solid, but she was stammering softly, "well I um I already have Brooke and Julian."
She nodded, "I know that. I don't want to take them away from you. I just want to be a piece of your life. We can just hang out, you can spend time at my apartment occasionally. Let's just give it a try?" she said
Sam paused, "I'll think about it." She finally said.
They both ate in silence after that.
… … … …
"Hey momma" Sawyer said as she gave Peyton a kiss on the cheek. She buckled her seatbelt and waited.
"Soy?"
"What's up mom?" Sawyer said hoping Peyton didn't ask the question
"Where's Sam? Brooke told me to pick her up today." She said looking over at her daughter
Sawyer's heart quickened and looked away, "oh ummm, she went off on her skateboard. She must've missed the message or something."
Peyton wasn't buying it, "Sawyer look at me."
Sawyer turned around and decided to cover up her lie with annoyance, "God mom! What?! I already told you. Why would I be lying?"
Peyton dropped it, "Alright fine. But if you two are up to something. You're in big trouble Sawyer."
Sawyer breathed relief, but hoped to God that Sam would get home quickly.
Then she remembered their plan, "Oh, hey mom?"
"What?" Peyton said slightly annoyed at the way Sawyer responded to her previously.
"Umm I was planning on staying at Sam's on Friday. Is that cool with you?"
Peyton sighed, "I kinda wanted to spend time with you on Friday. But that's fine."
Sawyer smiled, "Awesome thanks mom!"
Once home she ran to her room and texted Sam,
So excited for Friday! Are you almost home? My mom's skeptical.
Sam opened her phone and got the text, "Oh shit" she said out loud.
"What's wrong?" Rebecca asked alarmed.
"I gotta get home. I forgot Brooke's gonna be there early today."
"I'll drive you Sam, it'll be faster" she offered.
Sam agreed. But luck wasn't on her side because the moment she got to their driveway, Brooke and Julian were getting off their car.
"Damn it, Damn it, Damn it!" was all Sam could say as Brooke turned to see Rebecca and Sam in the same car.
"I'm gonna kill her." Brooke said out loud.
Julian grabbed her, "Brooke calm down. Don't do anything stupid."
Brooke got out of Julian's grasp and headed towards Sam's door.
Sam didn't move from her seat, "I'm so dead."
Rebecca steeled herself for the confrontation and gently touched Sam's arm, "Don't worry Sam."
Brooke threw the door open, "Get the HELL out of this car Samantha!"
Sam froze, "mom wait I can ex-"
Brooke didn't want to hear it, "Sam if you don't get out of this car by the time I count to three, I swear to God…" She started, "One…"
"Are you serious?!" Sam said. Brooke didn't budge, "Two!…"
Sam blushed furiously as she fumbled for the seatbelt. Brooke got impatient and pulled Sam out by her arm,
"Go with Julian." She said gravely and let go of Sam's arm.
Sam nodded and made her way to Julian. He saw the fear in her eyes and he grabbed her hand and held on to it.
Brooke narrowed her eyes and glared menacingly at Rebecca through the open window, "Leave Sammy alone. I told you this on the damn phone already. She doesn't need you."
This scene brought memories back for Sam. She was four and it was a month before Rebecca gave her up. One of Rebecca's friends took Sam and was going to take her somewhere safe, but Rebecca stopped them and yanked her out of the car. Except in her memory Rebecca grabbed Sam and shook her,
"They're gonna take you away Sam to a horrible place where they hate little girls like you!"
Sam felt four once more. "Mommy no!" she yelled. Brooke turned around confused, "Sam?!"
In an instant Sam turned to Julian, "Daddy!" she cried, and grabbed onto him tightly attempting to hide in his shirt. "No, they're gonna take me away daddy!"
Julian recognized her state of "regressed vulnerability", as Dr. Gold called it, and picked Sam up, where she hid in the crook of his neck.
Rebecca smiled at Brooke, "well that's up to Sam isn't it?" With that she reversed the car and left.
Julian whispered softly to Sam, but she didn't let him go. "Sammy we're here. You're safe. No one's going to take you away, you're not four anymore. Don't worry."
Brooke turned around and saw Sam attempting to hide in Julian, she realized that this had triggered one of Sam's more painful memories. She wanted to slap herself for having been the catalyst of Sam's reacton.
'You can do this Brooke' she thought to herself.
She walked up to them, and gently rubbed Sam's back. "Take Sammy to her room." she said quietly
Julian took her and placed her on the bed. Sam's eyes were red. He kissed her on the top of her head, "Mom's gonna come talk to you in a bit, okay?" he said.
Sam looked up, "Am I in trouble?" she said nervously.
Julian smiled, "You'll be fine Samson. Don't worry."
… … …
Brooke opened the door and found Sam sitting on the bed, staring at her shoes. She went and sat next to Sam. Sam blushed once more feeling embarrassed that she had shown such a vulnerable side. She hadn't done so in a good while.
Brooke could feel her embarrassment, "Sammy. I'm sorry that you had to see that. I didn't know that you were going-"
Sam stopped her, "It's fine mom."
Brooke hesitated, "Are you fine now sweetie?"
"Yeah. It's no big deal" she said trying to act nonchalant
Brooke lifted Sam's chin, "Sam, yes it is a big deal. I don't ever want to hurt you sweetheart. I'm sorry I got so angry, but Rebecca's bad news."
Sam looked away, but Brooke gently moved her face back towards her, "do you understand that Sam? I really don't want you spending time with her."
Sam couldn't understand, "…but why?" she asked
"Look what happened today." Brooke said slightly exasperated.
Sam sighed and laid her head on Brooke's lap, she curled into her and let her mother's warmth woo her to sleep. She wanted to agree with Brooke, but there was something that didn't allow her to just say yes. Brooke combed through Sam's hair, wondering how this was all going to play out.
Hey guys! Thank you for the reviews so far. I'm not too sure if I'm doing a good job writing this or not. So please, be honest. Please review, as I'm finding myself inundated with so much to do. So I need that push. The drama will come, don't worry!