A/N

Hey guys, wow I must say I am COMPLETELY blown away with the response for this, my phone's been going crazy with all the add's and reviews :) I only joined Fanfic recently and have liked many (clearly) of the Hobbit and LOTR's stories, but have always felt that there aren't enough Fíli-centred ones, so thought I'd try my hand at one as he's my favourite! Am already up to chapter 4 here so will try and get the story done as I'm having a blast writing it! Have never written a story before so bear with me, I do a lot of reading and movie watching so it should make sense, and I have the plot all laid out, so it's going to be a very intense story :)

I also apologise to those who when I first posted it; it was called "If only to see you smile" as you can now tell that is the name of the first chapter, had a couple of uploading issues, then couldn't access the story, then I could re-access it so I managed to change it to its proper title.

I'm also planning on creating a playlist to go with this, I always listen to music when doing assignments and reading, and had thought a while ago that it would be a good idea, so I've decided to give it a shot as it'll make it all the more emotional :)

I've decided that the music that I think should accompany this chapter is the extended Mirkwood track from the Desolation of Smaug soundtrack, reason being it's tense throughout and I couldn't find one that worked for the whole chapter as well as what this one does. If you have a track that works better let me know, but I'm happy with this one. Don't worry, I have some really emotional tracks coming up for future chapters ;)

As much as it breaks my heart I do not own the writings or the characters of The Hobbit or Lord of the Rings, they are the wonderful and exclusive workings of J.R.R Tolkien

A dark shadow fell over Fíli as he sat there contemplating how best to trial his new wooden horse.

"Well well well." Looky what we have here boys." A voice drawled suddenly from behind him. Fíli turned around in shock to look up into the faces of five human boys standing over him, the one in the front with a somewhat evil smirk on his face.

"H-Hewo" Fíli said, gulping nervously. Who were these human boys? He'd never seen them in his life. And where was Bofur? Hopefully the toymaker came for him shortly and scared these boys away; the one in the front didn't look very friendly.

"H-Hewo" The boy in the front mimicked back, before laughing cruelly. "We know who you are, little dwarf and we know about your relationship to Thorin Oakenshield, which is why we came to find you. But before we get any further, allow me to introduce myself and my companions. I'm Drégo, this is Ronhín, Nörda, Télvin and Cardös. We live in the town, and know all about your family and how your father died recently. So sorry for you loss." Drégo said with a mock bow.

Fíli looked at Drégo with watery eyes. He'd managed to avoid thinking about his father all day, in fact it was the happiest he'd been since his father had died. Why did this boy have to bring this up?

"What do you want?" Fíli asked in a small voice.

Drégo pretended to look hurt "we do not want anything, little dwarfling. However when we learnt that Thorin's sister is with child, and then learnt that she is your mother, we knew we needed to speak to you. To tell you something VERY important before the baby arrives so that you could make the most important decision of your life." Drégo spoke with innocence, but his eyes were triumphantly malicious, and unfortunately for Fíli, he was all but drawn in by the voice.

Fíli looked at Drégo with shock. What could this human know about the dwarves and that was deemed so important to know before his sibling arrived? Why not after? And where was Bofur?! But that tone, so innocent, perhaps he had some tips? Yes thought Fíli, he only wants to help me with my new sibling. However Fíli failed to notice the maliciousness in the Drégo's eyes.

"What do I need to know Drégo?" Fíli asked hesitantly

Drégo sat in front of Fíli, his friends following suit. "Well little one…" Drégo began

"Fíli. My name is Fíli." Fíli corrected him gently.

"My apologies Fíli" Drégo said "Well, I believe you need to know something about dwarves and the reason for their difficulty to have children, aside from the lack of dwarven woman." Drégo checked to make sure Fíli's attention was completely on him, and he was not disappointed.

"You see before the dragon attacked Erebor, dwarven children were plentiful. Every family had more than one child, generally three or four, for the dwarven families were able to look after numerous dwarflings. However, after the dragon attacked, and your people were forced to flee, Thrór noticed the suffering of your people, the fact that many were dying due to illness, lack of shelter, but most importantly: the lack of nourishment. It wasn't the grown dwarves that were dying due to starvation, oh no, it was the dwarfling's." Drégo paused looking at Fíli with hidden glee. He had pulled the boy into his story as planned, his mouth hung open and his body was leaning forward slightly as he listened attentively. Drégo fought a smile before continuing on.

"The dwarfling's were dying of starvation, and there was nothing that could be done to save them, despite everyone's best efforts as all the dwarves too were starving, the grown one's just knew how to handle it better. By the time your people reached Ered Luin, only a handful of dwarfling's remained. Once your people were established they met together to discuss what should be done about future dwarfling's, to avoid losing so many ever again you see. After much discussion the dwarves of Erebor decided that only one child was to be had per dwarven family, and so it was written in the rules of your people."

Drégo finished his sentence softly and stared at Fíli, he watched the dwarfling process the information and waited, biding his time, for he knew what question would come next. The one question that could be used to truly break the spirit of this child, and to destroy Thorin Oakenshields' family.

"But..." Said Fíli frowning slightly, trying to think of how to ask his question "If there's only allowed one child, then why is mama having another? Won't she get in twouble?" Fíli asked, his eyes wide. Why would his Uncle let his mama have another baby if he knew she'd get in big trouble?

"Oh no, dear Fíli" Drégo purred, it was time to pounce, to deliver the crushing blow. "She won't get in trouble, if anything, Thorin will be thanking her. You see, the dwarves have what is called a back door to go with the rule. Dwarf families are allowed to have a second child, if the first was a huge disappointment. If the first child failed to turn out the way they were expected to, for any reason, then a second child could be had to 'replace' the first, and the first would just become a spare in the family, required to protect the second because the second is the more important one. Of course, the parents would never tell the child this, they would just let them believe they were important because they got to protect the wanted sibling" Drégo was sure to drag the word 'wanted' out.

Drégo sat back when he realised he'd been leaning forward as he spoke quietly to Fíli. "Take that, Thorin Oakenshield", Drégo thought "now it's your turn to see your family ripped apart, torn away from you out of your control. You had my father arrested for taking back what should have been ours and he wound up dead at the hands of another prisoner. I'm going to watch you as your nephew dies from grief, or maybe I'll put him out of his misery in front of you, we'll see what comes to pass first. Ah, revenge is sweet."

Fíli sat there processing this information, and this information hit him like a slap across the face. He was a disappointment, he wasn't what his mother and father had wanted; he'd failed them. They had decided to replace him because they no longer loved him. His father had died before he got to meet the son he had truly desired, instead stuck with the memory of a failure. And Thorin, his Uncle whom Fíli loved with all his heart had only been pretending to love him, waiting for another nephew that he could truly love to come along.

Fíli blinked back tears, a small whimper escaping his lips. "No,"he thought to himself, trying to push away the feeling of dread, "Drégo is lying. Unca will pick me up tonight, just wike he pwomised, and he'll kiss me goodnight, wike he always does. And mama will be there to kiss me and tuck me in."

Before Fíli could tell Drégo what he'd been thinking he heard Bofur calling his name. Drégo and his friends leapt up in fear and ran off. Drégo was the last to leave however as he crouched next to Fíli again and whispered "I know you don't want to believe me, little Fíli, but they no longer love you. I think now is the time to decide what you want your future to be: live unloved forever, or leave and never come back." And with that Drégo was gone.