And now to answer said reviews: confusio:Cheesums bro! For the love of satan, write MOAR! seriously this parody is one of the best I've read so far!
cheers, mate!
Me: WOW, thank you for your flattery c: I am seriously blushing, because that is so nice and I don't think that's true at all. Cheers, mate!
guest:My brain literally died reading this. God what was wrong with the person who wrote the original?
Me: I feel the feelings, man. I literally had to force myself to finish the original. I can only hope it was something serious like a brain-eating tumor that made her angry and bad at spelling and grammar, because otherwise, it is very sad. Oh, that's terrible, isn't it? O.o OKAY. MOVING ON.
Lol'ingMyHeadOff: My Immortal is actually readable? It's a MIRACLE! Please please please continue, this is awesome!
Me: Indeed, it is~ I am trying to continue, but as you can imagine, the process is a long one to turn something unreadble into a miracle :p Honestly, though, thank you so very much for the compliment! :)
Astonished: Oh my gosh. You have achieved the impossible. I can read this without my eyes bleeding out from sheer awfulness. *Applause*
Me: *bows shyly* thank you so much for thinking I achieved the impossible! But to me that would be passing my Calc 2 class xD I'm glad your eyes are not bleeding, I saved you a trip from the hospital!
MelissaMachine5000: Hahaahah I was laughing the whole time (cos I'm goffik). The chapter questions were just an added bonus :D Me: Oh? I'm honored I could make you laugh, my goffik audience is my most important! Lol. And thank you, the chapter questions were my way of adding some originality to this fanfiction!
Millie the Kitty: First, let me say I absolutely LOVE this version! I'm really confuzzled though... Drako's talking to everyone, and then he's commiting suicide. HELP! But seriously, great job!
Me: First, let me say I absolutely LOVE you for loving this version! THANK YOU SO MUCH. And yeah, the original fanfiction is just as confusing. I'm literally just taking the original and making fun of the words and terrible plot she (he?) uses.
30 Seconds to Mars Bars: Well. Thats all my brain cells dead. Me: I apologize. Would you like me to arrange a funeral, free of charge?
Anon E. Mos: I... I just can't. You took away my ability to can.
"Oh, hey. I'm Ebony Dark'ness blah blah, some shit I can't rememeber. I'm a vampire,"
That's what you get for having five names, you bitch.
"You probably have AIDS anyways, because I gave them to you!"
DAFUCK?
He put his boy thingie in my boy thingie and WE HAD SEX. Is that stupid? I know it is!
Haha, when did girls have dicks? And you can't put a dick in another dick. Wow...and yes it is stupid.
Don't get me wrong, I'm totally not flaming you. This is amazingly funny. I love the chapter questions. I was lucky enough to only read an excerpt of My Immortal and I laughed so hard I started crying (not bloody tears). Hilarious parody. Props.
Me: First of all, great name ;D I'm sorry I took away your ability to can *hands back* Five names are dumb and unnecessary. And yes, you saw that sentence right, Ebony probably DID have AIDS. Actually, probably not, because she doesn't know how to have proper sex. Girls started having dicks around the Feminist Revolution, bro, didn't you know? xD And yes, I know you can't but apparently Tara did not. I know how stupid it is, and that is why I'm parody-ing it! :D Thank you for the lovely compliments! And I'm glad you did not cry bloody tears, because from what I hear from Ebony, it is a very serious medical condition.
Runwithscissorsxxxbattlescars: "Drako, that fucker, didn't answer, but he stopped his broom and walked off of it, falling to his death for the second time that night. I decided to follow him, because after all YOLO (or in this case YOLT) and walked off curiously."
Whoa. I applaud people who can live twice.
"Instead I redyed my hair blackest black again, because it was starting to be just black, and that simply wouldn't do."
I didn't even know anything could be blacker than black.
"He put his boy thingie in my boy thingie and WE HAD SEX. Is that stupid? I know it is!"
Wonder of wonders, girls have boy thingies now?
Man, you should write parodies for a living! The Harvard Lampoon would worship you!
This is beautiful. And I'm sorry, the original version did a better job of sucking than you ever could. No offense or anything, but you probably couldn't write badly if you tried.
(I'm attempting a flame ;)
How can faces be blonde? I... really don't know.
Me: First of all, thank you for being the most flattering and enthusiastic of my supporters! It means a great deal to me that you are that interested in something I started for fun. Living twice is a talent, but is unfortunately wasted on the dumb. And yes, Ebony uses Loreal #112 Blackest Blackier Black Than Midnight. It is so black, it could probably lose a black hole in there. I am sure the Harvard Lampoon would not worship me, but it is kind of you to say so, sir or madam! SOMEONE SCOUR THE INTERNET TO HOW FACES CAN BE BLONDE.