Okay Idlehands informed me that she needs something to read so another short chapter…Jesus that's becoming a trend lately, I'm so going to have to reorganize these chapters once this story is done….Hope you enjoy.

If you're waiting for Moving On, keep waiting it's being really annoying and if you want more Omens tell me.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Stripped

His first instinct being awakened in the middle of the night was to reach for his gun. Then as another noise followed, his hand paused; burglars and hit men didn't generally hit up your bathroom. Well then again technically speaking his very favorite cat burglar did.

His hand rose up to the top of his nightstand instead of the drawer and grabbed his glasses. Still squinting though he looked at the time, 3:17, definitely no doubt about why she was in there, a seizure.

Her seizures seem to know no difference in time of day; they struck whenever they wanted to ignoring whatever she had planned. He knew they'd been easier to predict before the implant, symptoms would start and she could generally take enough tryptophan to keep them mild until they'd finally abate entirely, she'd know when they were about to get bad. Now though she seemed to be fighting the start of them all the time or at least that was what it felt like to him. He seemed to see her constantly popping pills, not the continuous popping of when she was right in the middle of one. No pills casually taken in the middle of dinner, before a job, out in the middle of the night.

They hadn't seemed to affect her too drastically yet, mostly because she seemed to generally ignore them. He'd had to point out on two different occasions seeing the slight tremor of her hands that there was no way in hell he was letting her risk her neck for Eyes Only in that condition, if he hadn't noticed he knew she would have gone.

There was no judging them anymore, no idea which ones would remain at the slight little tremors that she could deal with and quickly get rid of and which ones would stop her dead in her tracks. Like how he'd gotten a call from her all the way down in sector ten a few weeks ago. He'd found her behind a dumpster, full out seizing. She'd hidden trying to avoid drawing anymore attention to her.

Sebastian had been looking into ways to remove the implant, but nothing and no one he'd found yet had turned into anything real. There were talks of a liquid form to boost her serotonin, injecting it directly into her bloodstream, but Max had put her foot down to that saying she already looked like enough of a drug addict when they started to hit without adding needles into it. Sebastian had also pointed out the fact that they didn't know what suddenly infusing her system with that much serotonin would do to her system. The pills were more gradual; her body got a chance to adjust to the change.

So until they found something else, it was still the pills and Logan knew as he hastily transferred into the chair that as soon as this one was over Max was going to get another earful about why she was not only supposed to have them readily at hand, she was supposed to make sure he'd always know if she needed more. Berating her was going to have to wait though…

ooOoo

…

"Hey," she said as she was leaned over his sink where'd she'd been looking in the mirror seeing her strung out appearance.

"Hey yourself," he paused in the doorway as he calmed just the slightest bit seeing her at least still standing, that was always a good sign.

"Tried not to wake you," her words were shaky.

"That's a first," he said slowly moving towards her again.

She gave a short laugh; he could tell it was forced more to put his mind at ease than anything else. Then he watched as she was suddenly almost gripping the counter and leaning further over the sink as it braced her weight, "Seriously sucks," she said knowing there was no way to actually hide the strength of the seizure from him.

"You're telling me, I was on this beach in Crete, it's beautiful, Erimoupolis, it's right by this ancient cemetery-"

She was smiling until she leaned forward more.

"Hey, hey," he said coming up alongside her; his hand went up to her waist. "Come on," he said pulling her down, though it didn't take much effort to draw her into his lap.

"Really not feeling too hot," she said though she was suddenly feeling instantly safer secured by the arm he'd pulled her down with against his chest.

"I know," he softly said as his hand went to her cheek before dropping down to the wheels.

ooOoo

…

"Okay ride's over," Logan said approaching his bed.

"Darn," she smiled, barely standing before she fell into the bed, "that's kinda fun, can see why Brittany likes it."

He laughed and began to turn again.

"Where are you going?" she called out like a little kid, her voice had regained some of its strength at the thought of him leaving her.

"Get the pills that are now scattered across the counter, get you a glass of milk," he said spinning back.

"Oh,"

"I'll be right back," he reassured.

And he was.

"Do you really dream about cemeteries?" was the question on her lips as he reappeared in the doorway.

He chuckled and moved towards her, "No."

"Good to know," she smiled, "had me worried for a second."

He smiled as he continued forth to put the glass on the nightstand, "Don't worry I promise if I dream of Greek beaches they're more Mykonos than Crete."

She looked at him puzzled.

"Guess they don't teach you that in Manticore's version of world geography, they've got the good beaches." He paused for a moment, "Especially to a 16 year old."

She gave a small disbelieving smile, had Logan really just implied what she thought he had?

"Good as in?"

"Good," he nodded. "Really left us worried about Bennett for a few years," another nod, this one more insightful and reflective. "Failed to take into account there were actually men on the beach."

She looked puzzled.

"Jeremy?" He said explaining the three out of four awed cousins overlooking the beach for the first time.

Ah, Jeremy, Logan's cousin, who she'd actually fought Logan on his sexuality.

"Max you know Jeremy's gay, don't you?" He asked as she'd made a very girl comment about how good the youngest Cale looked with his date.

"What?" she turned for that one.

"They're just for show," he said laughing realizing she hadn't noticed that.

Her mouth remained down as her mind struggled to process that. Logan's cousin? Jeremy? As in 6 foot tall, dark brown hair and eyes, body flawless enough to be a model, his frame leaner than that of his eldest brother and cousin, more model less jock. Just then it started to hit her…the fashion sense that she'd always put on par with Logan's was actually well above Logan's. Logan had simple pieces that all seemed to go with each other, Jeremy did the Original Cindy sense of style pulling pieces together that probably shouldn't go. "Oh," she said drawing out that single sound as it hit her, how had she missed that?

He'd laughed again, "Don't worry; the rest of us didn't catch on until he was 17."

"But…" the girl and…huh. "Can't imagine that going over too well with good ol' Uncle Jonas."

He shrugged his shoulders for that, "Eh, actually seemed to have the opposite effect." Not that his uncle had ever actually acknowledged it because acknowledging it could change the status quo. "He went against the very core of what he was at least in public; he was probably the best son." Sure Bennett had been the good child, but it had been easy for Bennett to be the good son, Jeremy would do a complete one-eighty from who he was in private to please their father.

Ooh Original Cindy wouldn't like hearing this, "So he just lied about who he was to make his old man happy?"

He just looked at her on that one, "Lying to my uncle is…was a whole lot easier than having to deal with him always knowing the truth. Jeremy goes home to Malibu and his boyfriend and he doesn't have to deal with my uncle the other three hundred and fifty days of the year."

"You know if I didn't know what an ass your uncle was, that'd just be wrong."

"Bennett's just shy," she said as her body continued to relax, "not his fault he got everyone else's share in the family."

"I'm shy," he defended not too convincingly.

Max rolled her eyes gave a small snigger, "Yea Logan, you're real shy." The boy might have had, sometimes still had some pretty low opinions of his self-worth, but he'd never been shy.

The small sly smile Logan let out, would have confirmed her opinion even if she didn't already knew he knew he could tend to exude confidence.

"Looks like those pills are starting to kick in," he said seeing her tremors lessening dramatically and her eyes starting to flutter shut.

They slid back open and focused on his eyes before they took on a mind of their own and slid down to Logan's chest. Really should keep the temperature higher, her mind briefly thought and that was all it was allowed to think. She shut it down before it wandered anywhere else, not too hard to do considering the state she was in.

"I'm gonna let you get some sleep," he said watching them close again.

Her eyes flashed open as her groggy brain computed what that meant; he was going to leave her. "Stay," her words didn't come across halfway as desperate and needy as they did in her mind, thanks only to her years of training to never appear weak.

He opened his mouth to start to refuse, but her eyes were wide and she toppled him with that single word, not to mention what good was he going to be on the opposite side of the apartment? "Okay," he sighed and realized 'so much for sleeping,' he'd just grab a sweatshirt and a blanket and cursed himself for getting rid of the chair and ottoman he used to have in his room after the shooting in a moment of rash, 'well I'm already in a chair, don't need another one causing clutter,' which he had a lot of in those early days.

So he slowly turned now that the adrenaline in his system was starting to recede, which he was thankful for, never had his heart beat so rapidly and frequently as it did since Max had come into his life. She tended to make him feel incredibly old or incredibly young on a frequent basis. Right now, it was the old, then again that might be the fact that he'd only slept for two hours and was now going to spend the rest of the night hoping to stay upright and knowing as the morning came so would the crick in his neck.

He moved to his dresser not even aware of the sliver of dark eyes watching him, still thinking for at least the fourth time this month, 'she's going to give me a heart attack.' Radios that go dead, dives into the bay, Max out of reach for hours, seizures, rattling around his apartment in the middle of the night like a thief…

She rolled watching him as he crossed the room, he'd deposited her on the side closer to the door, his side where the blankets were already pulled down and his scent permeated everything around her.

She sat at the top of the Needle, icy rain and wind nipped at her bare arms but she refused to move. A single thought had kept her focused the entire way over, kept her on her bike at every red light as she saw, heard or smelt something male, the need to hide, to escape, to be separated from everyone and thing.

So she sat at the top by the windows, not daring to move because she was only so skilled, the rain, wind and her boots meant she had almost no traction and one small slip could turn out pretty poorly for her since they'd skipped throwing in any hummingbird or flying squirrel, probably hadn't wanted them anymore at war with themselves than they already were.

She sat and she thought as her body vividly recalled each touch, each sensation.

She'd proven it without a doubt, his blood did run red, he was attracted to her. Original Cindy had been right the chemistry between them was combustible. Heat didn't mean she found everyone good, it meant she found relief. With Logan though it had been better than good, it had been right.

But not to him.

She'd proven something else.

She was right. There was something wrong with her. That was the only way to explain it.

She watched still with sleepy eyes as the muscles in his shoulders and back extended as he raised the dark blue sweatshirt over his head. Matching his boxers, she realized remembering the varying shades of blue and white stripes. He always wore sensible boxers, though not as dull as solid gray, black or white boxer briefs she knew he'd taken to wearing because of the exo. Gotta buy him boxers with ducks or bunnies, she thought with a smile, the thought of Eyes Only, of super serious Logan Cale working behind his computer in yet another life or death drama with bunny undies…

"Something funny?" he asked turning, the large white block letters of his alma matter now emblazoned across his chest.

"Just picturing poor Bennett turning purple," she lied though more than willing to go back to their previous discussion.

He smiled with the memory of his cousin's wide eyes and frozen feet, "That was probably one of our best family vacations."

"I can imagine," Max replied dryly before her lips twitched up realizing that Logan would never be saying this to her normally. This was Original Cindy's 'Witching Hour' that short time right before bed, at the end of the day, normally after a lot of booze in which you revealed all, lost your inhibitions. It was normally the time Max was talking people out of either calling their exes or showing up on their doorsteps if they didn't have phones. She wouldn't have expected it from Logan since she'd been around him and a decent amount of booze on more than a few occasions, seemed she was wrong.

She fought against her eyes closing; she wanted more of the completely regular guy Logan, the full depth of him instead of just the parts he chose to share. She liked being exposed to the lightness of him she didn't get to see all the time as his mind was almost always on a dozen different things.

"Max, close your eyes and go to sleep," he said as if to a little child after seeing her struggle, "I'll be here if you need anything."

She pouted ever so slightly and let her lids drop, but continued to listen to the almost non-existent sounds of the chair moving in the direction of the bathroom, then the chair started to move back towards her, 'What the hell was he doing?' Her eyes blinked open a moment later after the pause of the pair and the soft rustling of cloth and Logan was rearranging the blanket draped over him. She let out a soft chuckle seeing his serious look as she did so.

"What?" he asked looking up.

"What are you doing?" she asked with a 'you're an idiot smile.'

"Getting comfortable," he asked wondering why she was finding this so amusing. She'd asked him to stay, he was staying and he wasn't in any shape to be moving around furniture like he normally would.

"You're going to stay there? All night?"

"That was the plan," he nodded, growing more than slightly frustrated, after all he'd still only had 2 hours of sleep.

She stopped looking at him and looked over her shoulder to the vacant spot on the bed for effect before back at him.

Oh, he thought to himself but gave no outward expression.

"Promise to keep my hands to myself," she said holding up the slightly trembling hands. She frowned down at them, "At least intentionally," she said even though she knew they wouldn't cause movements large enough in scale to reach him. She smirked, "I seem to be saying that a lot lately," she said making the dig at herself in heat.

He gave her the 'don't do that to yourself look,' pretty sure he hated it more when she put herself down than she would when he would do it…What a pair they were. "Need anything else?" he asked before he started 'round the bed.

"Magic cure?"

"Sorry all out."

"Then I'm good."

So he made his way around the bed, pulled back the cover before he positioned himself to transfer into bed, it was oddly natural now after over a year and a half, as thoughtless as sitting down, something he never thought would happen. So where it had once dominated his thoughts it now left him free and clear to fight other ones. The 'just a bed' thoughts, 'we've shared a bed' thoughts, which were finally settled by 'she's sick' thoughts even if his self control finally took that final plunge off the deep end, she was too sick to do anything. So it took awhile, but as she drifted off and the medication seemed in full control he too fell asleep with a deep sigh wishing he could change everything about the world except that they were in it together.

ooOoo

…

She'd passed out from exhaustion as the meds finally allowed the seizure to abate. Comfortably asleep in his bed with no real thoughts running through her mind just the feeling of peace and safety.

Those feelings left though as the images started to bombard her in a nightmare. Flashes of the past she'd never be able to outrun, seeing them cut up her brother and the thought that had accompanied her that fateful February day trying to hide the seizures as she feared she would end up like Jack, but instead it had been her sister who had lost her life, right in front of Max's eyes.

The memories were hazy, some coming in crystal clear snapshots, others a blur speeding past her, from full Technicolor to black and white. They'd started out slow, the dream had began happily, Crash with her peeps…Then she was back at Manticore only younger…She'd watched them cut open her brother, Lydecker observing as if it were a simple task…The horror had begun to flow through her.

Then seeing it and feeling it within herself. Knowing she'd up like Jack. She didn't want to die…She didn't want to die.

Seeing Lydecker raise up that gun and watching her sister fall…The blood wasn't red…It was all in black and white.

But the gray of her blood was replaced by silver as she realized she was strapped down, Lydecker standing to the side of her casually sipping his coffee. The tried to scream, but nothing came out as the scalpel left her sight and approached her body. She felt it tear into her and she tried to scream again that she didn't want to die, but it just kept moving. She didn't want to die…She didn't want to die.

His voice pulled her out of it, the strength of his arms holding her up and close to him. His words ordering her to swallow. That's when she moved her mouth, tasting and feeling the chalky pills. She swallowed and promptly choked.

She heard his muffled curses, leaned forward with his body as he reached past to the nightstand. Gagged as she felt the glass pressed up against her lips pouring the warm creamy liquid down her throat as she blinked finally taking in the dark room as he continued to hold her close to him.

She started to sputter at the milk, sending it falling down to her and the sheets before he took it away from her mouth the glass almost drained. She felt it pressed up against her back as he turned her more into him as the hand that had been holding her was now rubbing her back trying to soothe her choking.

"It's okay," she finally heard his words entirely instead of in a blur. She didn't say anything in response though she just held onto him as she buried her head into the warmth of the blue cotton. She felt the glass fall away, just before his hand moved up to her neck, "It's okay," he whispered again just as she passed out.

He didn't fall asleep though as he leaned back into the pillows a few minutes later still holding her closely to him. It wasn't what he knew she'd tease him about; it wasn't about his milk soaked sheets. Her words kept him up for over an hour, as that tiny scared voice came out of that normally strong body as she'd cried that she didn't want to die.

He just held her and reassured himself that she was safe and tried to convince himself that she was going to stay that way.