Idlehands: See here's the thing, each update tends to be strongly influenced by the ratio of hits v. reviews for the latest chapter. So therefore this story ended up all the way at the bottom of the list. 1 percent of the hits resulted in a review for this story. 3.9 for Attempts at Living. 1.9 for Moving On. 3.2 for Remnants. 2.6 for Falling In. So despite having more readers that makes me feel there are a lot less people interested in seeing this story continue v. the others. Did that make sense? I'm sorry you disagree with them, if I had any idea where Babyangel has disappeared to I'm sure she'd agree with you and smack me upside the head. :-P
AN: Thanks for reading and reviewing folks.
Possible boo boos: The Virtual DA Series site is momentarily down and I can't find the sector map that I know is hidden in some thread over on DAR so if my locations don't coincide with the numbers I apologize, I used a current map and I don't know if they're the same as in the DA world.
2nd: I was lazy, didn't feel like finding the dvd or signing in to ask so I can't remember what floor Logan lived on (yes yes penthouse got that, don't know the actual numbers, high twenties or low thirties I think so if I got it wrong in the story feel free to comment and I'll change it).
Oh and this chapter is solely devoted to Idlehands who harassed me in other story reviews and even threw in an extra one for this story to get a new chapter. Anyone else with me in harassing her for a new chapter of "Calamity Cruise," you know they labeled it 'incomplete' over on DAR and I think they're starting to give up hope of you finishing it. :hint hint:
Chapter 33
Small Truths
10:53 Saturday Morning:
One word rang through her head as the clasp of lacy dark purple bra was released and it was finally.
-o-o-o-
Earlier in the day:
Their morning had started off slow and leisurely as she turned up mid-pour of his breakfast cereal...
"Got enough milk for two?" she asked leaning up against the wall as he was oblivious to her arrival, still sleep blurred in the gray boxers he'd slept in and the black tee-shirt he'd thrown on to combat the slight chill upon waking.
"I always keep a spare for you," he said with a slight nod back to the fridge.
That knowledge brought a small smile at her lips as she went to go retrieve another bowl. Logan didn't shop like a bachelor. Instead he kept his house as stocked as a family of four.
He did a lot of things that didn't exactly say 'lone bachelor.' He changed the sheets on the guest bed she used every time he changed his own so they would be fresh. He changed the toothbrush that was tucked in next to his as well. A razor, not his own, was nestled alongside the floral shave gel and had been ever since he'd walked into the bathroom to find one leg up on the sink and his electric razor humming, the night she needed to break into the strip club, especially after finding out she'd been doing it all summer.
"Well someone's got to use it," she'd smiled.
Another bowl had been pulled out, more cereal went in as did milk. A few stories from the night before filled the air as they ate across from each other in companionable silence most of the time as Logan finished waking up.
"Any interest in hitting up the farmer's market with me?" he asked halfway through his bowl.
She shrugged, "Not like I have anything planned."
"That and it pretty much guarantees you a meal this week if you help with the ingredients," he smiled one of his smiles, the kind that made her forget all about the Pulse, Manticore, her family unknown and scattered about the country, the dumb bitch that had invaded her apartment…
"And what do you call this?" she asked looking down.
"A proper meal," he amended, "breakfast is merely a means to not passing out before lunch."
She laughed.
-o-o-o-
She sat on the couch, feet on the coffee table, clicker in hand as she waited for him to emerge from his bedroom, ready to start their day. She pouted, not at the morning news that was playing, but at a thought.
She wondered if he would hold her hand.
Which made her wonder if she wanted him to hold her hand.
Then as the pout slid further down, she realized she did.
How had this happened?
What had she been thinking to let it go this far?
"Something happen?" he asked walking into the room, putting together the frown and the news.
She turned and smiled unexpectedly as she caught sight of him in a mustard yellow tee-shirt with a faded print emblazoned across his chest, his short hair mildly tousled with gel having grown the slightest fraction in the past week for him to once more be okay with it, light scruff, which she knew meant he'd shaved at some point yesterday. His eyes without the frames giving her full access into the depths of him he'd once kept hidden. "Contacts for the second time in a week?"
He smiled looking down at her, "Realized they were going bad in soon, figured I should use them up. So what about the news?" he nodded before moving to sit down tossing the brown track jacket he'd been carrying on the arm of the couch.
Relaxed, unguarded, he'd made the slow transition into someone who was okay with himself and every time she realized it, it made her smile just a tad brighter, "You pay attention to the weather lately?" 49 degrees had flashed on the screen as she'd passed a bank on her ride over and he was wearing an outfit she hadn't seen since October.
"I'll throw a jacket on; I've had enough of sweaters."
"Even that cashmere hoodie Bits bought you for Christmas?"
He stopped and only briefly thought about it, "God that's a great sweater."
Didn't she know it, she'd stolen it on more than a few occasions, the best thing was since it was large enough to accommodate Logan's frame she could tuck her legs into it while sitting and not risk stretching it. It was like being in a cocoon, what she imagined being in her mother's womb must have felt like, well minus the extra special scent of Logan, which definitely added to the coziness it provided. "Debating changing?" she asked realizing he'd gone silent.
A breath of air and a smile emerged from his lips, "Nah," he shook his head before nodding at the tv, "so what about the news?"
"Uneventful morning or at least that's all they're saying."
Uneventful, normal, average, mundane, okay maybe their relationship had never been mundane, but she'd known what to expect. She found herself missing the first sure thing in her life more than ever before.
Not that she wouldn't be okaywith this, it was just that she had no idea what this wasShe needed some set parameters. Act like you always do, she reminded herself, that's what he's doing.
And he had. That large frame of his had settled back, completely relaxed against the back of the couch as he watched the news.
Why the fuck is he always calm about this whole thing? But her posture gave nothing away, chill and slightly disinterested, somewhere in the back of her mind was taking in the 'extra' fuel shortage of the upcoming weeks that they were talking about on the news, seriously they were already talking about almost zip, how much extra did they think they could take? She'd been in a few lines that had gone completely insane especially when the fuel ran out, you were sometimes lucky to make it out of there with your life.
"So what's on the menu this week at Chez Cale?"
"I don't know, I guess it all depends on what the have at the market, any requests?"
"Still waiting on that fondue," she pointed out.
"Oh that's right. Hmm," he murmured aloud trying to figure out where they'd actually have all the necessary cheeses. Very few places especially right by them had everything, there were days he'd spent an entire afternoon traipsing from store to store trying to find all the ingredients for a specific meal, which is why he almost never went with a set meal in his mind, only general ideas, inspirations.
She turned and looked at him, waiting to see what was going to follow that murmur.
"I guess we could try Magnolia Farms," he said continuing to think about it.
"Never heard of it. Let me take a wild guess it's out in Magnolia?" Aka, Sector 8.
He nodded, "They tend to keep it pretty well stocked."
With prices through the roof no doubt. She let out a breathy laugh, "So what do you know every specialty shop in the city?"
He laughed and relaxed even further, "Probably notwe still have a shocking number considering how many people eat Rattus seared over an open flame."
Rat cooked in an oil drum, she laughed. "So you head to Magnolia on a regular basis?" Odd, she'd never even heard him mention going there before, aside from a few jobs he'd sent her to in the Marina and she certainly hadn't seen any gourmet shops there.
"Not really," he nonchalantly answered, "I grew up there though."
Eyebrows came together. Hadn't he grown up in the stately homes of sector 11? The Capital Hill of Seattle?
He laughed and his head shook, "Okay or until I was eleven and few various weekends in the summer after that." He might have felt as if he was grown up that September just before he turned 12, but he knew now that he hadn't been.
"I didn't know that," her voice softened partially in pain for that little boy and partially in puzzlement, why were there such large gaps in her knowledge of him? "Smart parents," she said with a smile knowing how he hated things he'd misconstrue as pity and she had to move along the conversation, "opposite side of Seattle from Jonas and Margo."
He laughed, "My mother's number two reason for our house."
"And what was number one?" she asked always looking for more.
"She said it was the closest she was going to get to a Tuscan Villa in King County Washington," he smiled.
Max laughed, "Which probably isn't saying much." She'd made it out to the ritzier end of the sector once and only once, certain areas Normal trusted to those who had been trustworthy for years and despite saving the guy's life that wasn't her. The area had been nice, plenty of green space, a hodgepodge of architecture, from Modern, to ranch, to the stately and everything in between.
He laughed, "It was actually nice, a lot of free space, wasn't confining like my Uncle's. We used to have dinner on the deck and watch the sun setting into the water."
"Damn," she smiled.
He laughed, "Yea it was decently nice," he gave her a wry look, "if you like vaulted ceilings, fireplaces, heated floors, greenhouse, second kitchen," he tacked everything on with a joking look.
"Let me reiterate, damn."
He laughed.
"Who needs more than one kitchen though?"
Logan smiled, "My mother. They entertained a lot, our first house, which was in Capital Hill only had one and she said it used to be overrun with caterers. So she had them throw in a spare as they were planning it."
Max once more laughed, "Because people just threw in spare kitchens?" She didn't have a working stove! Talk about unfair.
He laughed, "My mother did. It was her dream house, she started planning it when she was pregnant with me, we didn't move in until I was six."
A wave of sadness overtook Max as she realized Logan's mother had spent more years planning her dream home, dream life than she'd gotten to live it. It's why you live your life in the present, a voice within called out to remind her. No one was guaranteed a tomorrow, not even in the picture perfect time of the Pre-Pulse with all the money in the world.
Out of the blue something began to bother her. Were they ever going to be something more than a reaction to the first decade of their lives? Cynical loners despite polar opposite childhoods? Maybe two wrongs actually did make a right? Two hurts could heal?
She found herself wanting more answers, that set parameter for what they were becoming because all she wanted to do right now was take him into her arms or crawl into his.
"That reminds me."
She looked over at him.
His finger pointed at the tv, "Lakers are back in town next week and I owe you a game."
Her mind halfway took in the sports highlight reel. And there goes open and honest Logan, knew it was too good to last. "At least Bling had a good time, heard the game was killer."
"Yea," he frowned, "don't remind me." Missed a good game, spent a lot of good money and what did he have to show for it aside from a gun in his hand at the end of it. "I'll call around see if I can score us some tickets."
"Let me know if you need some help, I know a few people," she said with a cocky toss of her head.
He laughed and pushed up, "Will do."
"We heading out?"
He nodded, "We should get there before all of Seattle is out."
She clicked the tv off and stood as she tossed the remote onto the table as Logan slid his arms into the track jacket.
They made their way out of the living room, down the hallway, past the office and she realized that his love of free flowing spaces had probably been started on those heated floors overlooking the water, not to mention killer views, but he suppressed all conscious thought of it.
A sudden whir or actually a lack thereof, caused them both to stop as they were about to grab their jackets.
"Was that?" Max began to ask as Logan's eyes shut and he grimaced.
He sighed before his eyes opened, "My computer shutting down?" He nodded, "Yea." He took a step and tried to turn on the light to no avail. A brownout. "So much for the market," he returned his coat to the hook.
"Haven't had one of these in awhile."
"Sign of progress and we should probably be happy we weren't in the elevator. Last time it took them almost an hour to get the generator started up."
-o-o-o-
Saturday Morning, 10:53:
She sat astride him on the couch, her hands repeatedly running over arms that could give most guys she knew including Bling's a run for their money. The kind of thing she'd never been attracted too until Logan.
The track jacket had slid off as they'd made the walk back into the living room and was casually draped over a chair as he ran through their options since he wasn't about to walk down 30+ flights of poorly lit stairs to the garage. Chess, the Monopoly set he'd proven that it wasn't just luck on, Scrabble, cards, preferably the random luck kind, a movie on his laptop.
'Movie sounds good,' she'd said with a nod, instead of the smile she wanted as she said the words, I think we can do better than that. She couldn't say that, not yet. Unless he was hinting for it, it just couldn't come out of her mouth for fear he'd say no.
They hadn't even made it past the opening credits though as they shifted around the couch, their bodies occasionally touching and neither remembering why they'd actually bothered putting a movie on. It had started with lingering hands as they shifted, then the next thing she knew her mouth was on his and his hand was on her thigh, guiding her body over to him.
So she sat astride him as the movie played in the background as they passed the time with slow and lingering kisses. Eventually they grew in their forcefulness and Logan's hands started to wander and the maroon shirt she was wearing started to travel upwards.
As his hands started to wander she found her unexpected changed in wardrobe a welcome relief, sports bras when going to see Logan had become a thing of the past no matter her outfit.
Even taken to wearing matching bras and undies as best she could. Today was a purple bra, a deep purple, it was one of the four non-sports bras she owned, saved normally for nighttime activities, like Crash or a club. The 'not too girly' color was repeated in some of the diamonds on her bikini briefs.
She might not have had the balls to thoroughly explore Kendra's 'gift bag' but she was pretty sure her friend would be proud of her for at least this and her thorough perusing of the pamphlets she'd included.
And here they were finally. No distractions, nothing to stop them.
Slow and leisurely…
Pings and whirrs greeted them as the electricity came back on, it momentarily distracted them, but they ignored it and a relaxed and pleased smile had graced his lips as he pulled the v-neck over her head finally with a bit of help. Lips grazed and nipped over the flimsy fabric, her head was leaning back along with her body to give him better access as the strong hands that had been wandering around her waist and back deftly unfastened the clasp. Fingers had slid under the straps…
Another gasp or two came from her before they reconnected in another kiss.
This is what it's supposed to feel like, she realized as they separated for a brief moment as she looked into his smokey eyes.
It was too much separation though and they returned to their kiss, hands exerting the perfect amount of pressure as he held her to him as her hands found themselves cupping the back of his neck, thumbs gently grazing the baby soft hairs.
A buzz interrupted their haze and she leaned back, he looked confused not having any clue who could be at his door before saying, "Ignore it," and found her lips once more, it didn't let up, but she wasn't about to say anything.
Anything that is until the pounding on his door began. They both leaned back and frowned, especially when a faint, " Logan," reached their ears.
He frowned and strained to place the voice that was following up with, "I know you're in there, so open up."
She pouted thinking, "Sounds like Bennett."
Logan looked annoyed, "That's because it is Bennett." He nodded with a hardened jaw, "Ignore him," he ordered and tugged her in closer to him, refusing to be interrupted.
Then a cry reached their ears surpassing the banging and muffled words, though not beating out the occasional press of the buzzer. "And that would be Nicky," Max said separating once more.
"This could only turn out poorly, trust me ignore him. He'll go away after awhile."
"It could be important," she said swinging her leg over and standing not giving him a chance to fight her on it.
He sat on the couch and continued to stare at her as she bent to retrieve the shirt and bra he'd dropped to the side.
"Gonna get that?" she asked rehooking her bra, when she received no answer aside from his continuing stare, "Think I won't answer the door like this?" she asked letting her hands fall to the side with her shirt still being carried between her fingers.
"I would say yes if it were anyone else," he said standing with a sigh knowing his cousin would either drool or blush before walking into the apartment and then he'd hear about it for the rest of his days, just like the damn 'Lion King.'
"Even your cousin Jon?" she asked as she turned the shirt inside in once more.
He turned with a smile, "I would pay to see that actually."
Her head tilted.
"He could use to be put in his place," he explained and continued looking at her with a smile.
A foot connected with Logan's door making Max realize she'd been standing there like an idiot smiling at him still standing in only her bra. "Anytime this century?" she asked with a shake of her head.
His face fell before it twisted into a sheepish smile, "I was hoping you'd forgotten."
"Haven't. Get to it."
He turned and sighed once he finally reached the door and the quick look through the peephole confirmed their suspicions, it was Bennett.
He smirked as his hand rested on the doorknob and an eye gazing out the peephole, waiting to see his cousin's body lean forward into the heavy pounding he'd been inflicting on the door and opened.
Bennett stumbled forward.
"Bennett," Logan gave his cousin a blatantly fake smile, "what brings you by?"
Really pissed off cousin, Bennett realized as he straightened himself out, forgetting his own annoyance and anger at his cousin briefly as he feared for his life.
"Heya Ben," Max said strolling into view.
Oooh, he instantly understood, well he was certainly going to make his wife and sister happy with this news. Well up until Bitsy killed Logan for lying to her. "Morning Max, sorry to bother you guys," he took a few steps back to retrieve his son and stop his tears with a swaying motion of the stroller.
"No problem," she smiled as he did that.
"You scuffed my door," Logan said in shock looking down.
"It was an emergency."
See told you so, Max shot over to Logan.
Logan looked disbelieving, "And what exactly is the emergency Bennett?"
"You can't say no," Bennett began with, giving his cousin a hard look. "You are my cousin," he said the words with conviction.
"What can I not say no to?" Logan asked rather dejectedly.
"The sitter Marianne spent months trying to find canceled at the last minute on us and we have a wedding in an hour an a half."
"Where's Bitsy?"
"I don't know her cell is off, I've been calling it for the past hour."
"What about your mom?"
Max snorted at the evil look Bennett gave Logan.
"Why don't you have friends?"
"I have friends they're going to be at the wedding, which is why you're taking Nicky at least until I can find Bitsy."
Max leaned up against the wall, proud of Bennett for finally growing a backbone where his family was concerned, even if he was just starting with Logan who actually had relatively close access to him soul in comparison to other Cales.
"We had plans," Logan attempted one last ditch effort.
"Yea," Bennett replied dryly, "I can tell from your hair."
Max chuckled, she had done some damage to his locks, not her fault they were so soft.
Logan shot her a look.
"Go Bennett," she finally spoke up, "enjoy the wedding, we'll do our best to keep him intact till you get back."
"Max," Bennett gratefully smiled, "you are a good woman, unlike my cousin."
Logan who had decided to frown down at the baby, looked up sarcastically, "Shame I always tried so hard to be a good woman."
Max laughed, she liked how completely average he could be where his family was concerned.
"Look, I'll just go toss these bottles in the fridge," he pulled out a large ziplock bag of bottles from the basket under the stroller. They followed him into the kitchen as he continued talking, "Marianne wrote out about five pages of instructions and she gave you all our numbers and if you have a heart you won't use them. The instruction book for the stroller is in the bag too in case you want to use it as a car seat."
They followed him back into the entryway after he dropped off the bottles, "Oh and one last thing," he said as he was walking out the door, "it's breast milk, so don't use it to flavor your coffee."
Everyone smiled.
"Just hurry back Ben," Logan shook his head, slightly amused with his cousin.
"8, 9," Bennett nodded, "10 at the latest."
"Get out of my apartment Ben," Logan said closing his eyes realizing there must be a large gap in between the wedding at the start of the reception.
"Thanks guys," Bennett smiled as he left the apartment.
Umm yes obviously this storyline will be continued in the next chapter, otherwise this chapter would have been insanely long and not posted for another month. :-P
Question: Logan too 'Tony' in this chapter? I feel like M and L are off in all my stories. (Note to self: must watch dvds again when I get the chance.)
The nine millionth thanks for reading:-P