Chapter 6
"It is impossible to tell where revelations stop and hallucinations begin."
-Author Unknown
In all honesty, Chloe expected to be here again. She expected to feel this way and to not truly understand what was happening. It was what her life was reduced to after her crash: incomprehensible events. It was only fitting that her life, dedicated to uncovering truths and revealing events, had descended into an obscuring veil. She could describe it no other way, especially since she knew herself to be Zor-El once more.
Zor-El was sitting in a darkened room and drinking some kind of fluid that burned on the way down her throat. She felt a steady pulsing heat flow through her veins, an ebb of heat that was followed by a cooling sensation. It was an amazing feeling and Chloe could only deduce that maybe this was some kind of alcoholic beverage. There was a whirring sound and intermittent beeping in the room. Zor-El touched the cool glass to his forehead and sighed. She felt sad and intense disappointment. He glanced up and Chloe could barely make out an even darker shape on a table.
"We're all fools, machine. To a last Kryptonian, we're all fools. I should've ended this long ago."
Chloe could felt her throat clench. It was impossible to think, but Zor-El was on the verge of tears. He slammed his hand onto the arm of the chair. Zor-El snorted into his glass Chloe felt the sting on the palm of her hand, but a quick swig of her drink made the pain inconsequential. She closed her eyes. Chloe, herself, was frustrated beyond whatever Zor-El was feeling. She didn't know what caused this and she didn't dare guess. What would be the point? "Dammit, hallucination! Exposit or something!"
Zor-El heaved himself up and out of his chair and staggered towards the dark shape. He waved his hand in the air and the room was illuminated. Chloe saw that the figure on the table was Brainiac, her father. Her mind recoiled from this vision. She hadn't coped well the first time she had seen this and it would be no different this time. There was a computer display next to Brainiac's head. It seemed to be some kind of diagnostic.
Quick words scrolled across the screen. From Zor-El's knowledge, Chloe realized that Kryptonian script worked on two different planes and that Jor-El and Brainiac had simplified the script to be compatible with human technology and understanding. Left to right gave the grammatical form and up to down gave context. The readout was telling her Brainiac's programming. This was the source of Zor-El's steep disappointment: Brainiac had been modified and dangerously so.
Admitting his brother was a genius had never been a problem. Zor-El was proud of his younger brother, but he was not proud of the man Jor-El would eventually become. Jor-El knew how to build things. He knew how to program them and give them purpose, but such things didn't matter if Zor-El didn't integrate Brainiac into the organic shell. It required modification to the program. The true consideration was years before, he had designed Brainiac's function.
Zor-El knew what Brainiac could be and he narrowed that scope because it could only lead ruin to advance the programming to its natural conclusion, but Jor-El removed the limitations on Brainiac. His brother was a fool. And he was one as well for not monitoring the situation. The High Council were fools on general principle and the populace were fools for trusting them.
Chloe caressed Brainiac's hair. It was real and not synthetic. For a moment, she saw Brainiac as Zor-El saw the machine: a dark-haired Kryptonian that could be a brother in the House of El. He was beautiful in the way that Clark was, in the way that Zor-El and Jor-El were. Zor-El couldn't possibly understand that he was looking into the face of the thing that would destroy Krypton.
She wanted to infer some kind of deep and troubling psychological meaning in this new knowledge, but the only thing she could come up with was the fact that Jor-El was working with an ego and pride on a level that could not really be placed into the context of anything she knew.
"I'm sorry, brother."
Chloe couldn't tell if he was directing his softly spoken words to Brainiac or to Jor-El, but it didn't really matter. Zor-El was in just as deep as Jor-El; and even though his motivations were coming from a different place, it ended where Jor-El led. Zor-El turned away from Brainiac and shutdown Brainiac and all other machinery in the room. They were cast in darkness. There were no blinking lights or any whirring machine sounds. Chloe only perceived the still air, her own ragged breathing, and the dryness of her throat.
It was only fitting that Zor-El would leave for his hydroponics lab where his beloved nura flower grew. And it was only inevitable that she only had a moment of peace before Jor-El burst into the room, breathing metaphorical fire. His aggression was almost a tangible force that pressed against her, but oddly enough, Zor-El remained calm. He was singularly unmoved and distinctly unconcerned with Jor-El. It was more of an irritation than any other emotion. For Chloe, it was rather bizarre given Zor-El's earlier intense disappointment and their other encounter.
Jor-El/Clark once again stood a few feet away from Zor-El/Chloe and seemed to be waiting for acknowledgement. It struck Chloe anew how much of Clark's behavior she saw in Jor-El's. It was tempting to list this into the nature column, but these behaviors were easily the product of entitlement and nature. Clark was destined for greatness and Jonathan and Martha knew it. They knewit. And it didn't hurt that he could legitimately think he was special due to his abilities. Clearly, Jor-El was some kind of golden boy and it was reinforced through past experience. Even now Chloe had a certain intuition: Clark would break his silence in the next moment.
His yell invaded the room. "What is this, Zor-El!"
Chloe chuckled softly and kept tending his nura flower, but did not answer. He would make Jor-El reach his breaking point. She knew her way around Clark's emotions, his mind, and she would walk that path and kick every stone. There was a moment of dissonance as Chloe felt herself emerge again. It was becoming harder and harder to not insert her own mind and identity into this dream or hallucination or whatever was happening.
"You think this is funny? You think you can just…do as you please? This is my work! MINE!"
After the outburst, Clark seemed to calm. For the first time in his life, he would be humble and he would plead, "This is my legacy, brother. Surely you can understand how important this is? This can change the face of Krypton itself."
Zor-El rolled his eyes; forever the play actor, even in sincerity. Chloe turned from her work and looked at her brother. If it had not been apparent that Jor-El was angry by his yelling, then his appearance certainly confirmed the notion. He looked to have thrown on his clothes with little care for appearance, which was a rarity for his tidy brother.
Zor-El would be calm. He would not let his brother move him to anger as easily as he had manipulated Jor-El. This conversation would be hard enough.
"I suppose you don't care why I audited the project. I suppose you don't want those answers. Only for me to change the color of the sky and rearrange valleys to your pleasure," Zor-El gestured absently and circled Jor-El, "You've changed the programming in violation of the charter the Ministry gave you. That, brother, is illegal. You should've filed the appropriate paperwork."
Clark clenched his fists. "You've always been jealous, Zor-El. Watching me. Inserting yourself into mylife! I've worked on this project and on the eve of completion you let your ego get in the way of progress."
He grunted and covered his face with his hands. Jor-El would never understand and he would waste no more words on the matter. "Regardless. The audit has commenced. The project will resume once all proper protocols are observed. If you're lucky and you cooperate, the project will resume in a year, two at the most. Take the time to learn the lesson."
Zor-El turned his back on his brother, which he knew would end poorly but he did it to prove a point: Jor-El was inconsequential. He felt himself whirled around and the blunt force of Jor-El's fist in his face. To his everlasting credit, Jor-El seemed to be confused and regretful of his violent action, but it was too late. Some acts, once committed, cannot be brushed aside and too many of Clark's actions had been brushed aside. After a moment where it seemed that Jor-El was going to apologize, Zor-El charged.
His brother forgot that he had been a member of Krypton's Mining Force. He'd been to the edge of their space mining asteroid fields and facing pirates. Zor-El had trained with the Space Defense Ministry. Clark/Jor-El may have had a size advantage in that he was bulkier, but Chloe/Zor-El knew how to fight. Zor-El knew how to use his height advantage even though he was slim. And he/she would use that superior knowledge to remind Jor-El/Clark of his place.
It was a bloody fight and most of the blood was Jor-El's. When Zor-El finally came to himself, Chloe saw that Jor-El was on the ground and Zor-El was standing over him repeatedly kicking him. She kneeled and gently caressed Clark's face.
"You forget yourself, brother, and so do I. I am the Greater Son of the House of El, the Second Minister of the Science Complex, and Commander in the Mining Force. You are the Lesser Son of the House of El and an Adjunct to the Mechanics Sub-division of the Science Complex. This ends, Jor-El. We begin again or we end."
Jor-El nodded slightly. Something passed between the brothers and it seemed like it had been reconciliation.
Of course, Chloe knew for a fact that this moment changed nothing. Krypton was still destroyed and it was still Brainiac that did it and Zod was probably the catalyst.
The ghost figure of Brainiac/Gabriel shimmered into her view, "That's a lie, Chloe, and you know it."
Chloe could no longer hear Jor-El's labored breathing nor feel the sensations of Zor-El. She could only stare in shocked horror that this…phantasm…came to her. "A hallucination within a hallucination?"
Once again the stillness of the hydroponics room was broken by the entrance of security. Chloe didn't know why they had arrived, but Jor-El looked to be in desperate need of medical attention.
Zor-El stood with weary resignation and addressed the stunned security guards. He got his bearings and mustered his resolve, "Take him to the medic and see him to Observation. He is not to go home until I approve it. Understood?"
"But, sir-,"
Zor-El interrupted the guard before he could finish his sentence. "What is your name and house, guardsman?"
The guard cleared his throat before he answered, "Morrell of the House of Tarras."
"Well, Morell of Tarras, you are relieved of duty and your grade removed," Zor-El turned to the other men, "You have your orders."
The guards passed Zor-El and carried Jor-El from his hydroponics laboratory. He left soon after.
Zor-El didn't go home. He needed solitude and his wife and baby daughter would not allow the peace he needed. It was their right as his family to demand his time, but he could not be what they needed just yet. So it was a matter of inevitability that his time would be intruded upon by the last person he could possibly want to see. Chloe thought that Zor-El might just be cursed. She knew that she was.
Zod was gloating this time. There seemed to be genuine concern in his voice, in his demeanor. He walked to Zor-El's side and grabbed his shoulder.
"Imagine my surprise, Zor-El, when I hear you strip the grade from a guard after he questioned an order given to him by the Greater Son of the House of El. Imagine my surprise, when I hear that guards where there in the first place because a fight between the brothers of the House of El. Imagine my surprise to know that the Lesser Son of the House of El is to be seen by medics and then sent to Observation. And finally, imagine my surprise when I discover that Brainiac is to be audited on your order," Zod/Lex closed his eyes, "Are you imagining it? Because I think now is the time for answers. Surely we can agree on that."
It astounded Chloe again that she was in the body of a man. She was eye level with Lex, and while Zor-El may have been slim, he was still slightly bulkier than Zod's lithe frame. Zor-El stared at Zod in the eye. Something sparked between them. Chloe realized that it was desire, that these two shared something more than friendship. Zor-El and, by extension, she may have realized that Zod/Lex could never truly transcend his nature, but that didn't mean that there wasn't something there.
Chloe saw the exact moment that Lex/Zod decided to act and she knew it was the same moment that Zor-El had decided. It was a simultaneous thing. Chloe/Zor-El shoved Lex/Zod against the wall and kissed him roughly, while Zod frantically pulled and untied his robes. It seemed as if the moment had barely begun when Zod pushed Zor-El away to separate their bodies.
He licked his lips, smirked, and nodded to himself. "You are never one to indulge yourself and it has been an irredeemably long time, Zor-El. Maybe a bit slower."
A game. Slick words and arrogance. Zod wanted this on his terms, but Zor-El was not going to play. Zor-El/Chloe grabbed Zod/Lex's hand, drew his body against their's, and restrained Zod's hands behind his back. Zod merely quirked an eyebrow. It was a taunt. Zod wanted to know how far, he'd go. Chloe quickly let him go, turned him around, and pushed Lex face first into the wall they had occupied moments before. Zod's hands braced against the wall to prevent impact. Zor-El tightly wedged his body against Zod's to prevent him from maneuvering into a different position. He wrapped his hands around Zod's neck and forced his chin up and back.
Zor-El used his other hand to stroke Zod to arousal, while applying slight pressure to his neck. The sensation of having an erection was both mortifying and exciting. Zor-El's rush was her own. His desire was her own. Zor-El bit Zod's neck and pressed his lips to Zod's ear, with every word he gave a gentle nip, "No. My speed. My terms. My way. Or not at all."
Zor-EL held their position for a moment more, both of them coiled and primed. They would have a manic energy. He abruptly released Zod and walked towards his personal quarters without looking back. Zod would join him for it was in his nature to not deny himself; he had no control despite the fact that it was the one thing he desired most. In the end, as with Clark/Jor-El, Chloe/Zor-El knew her way around Lex/Zod's emotions, his mind, and she/he would walk that path and kick every stone.