Hello faithful readers! This is the last chapter of SSMSP! I hope you enjoy and of course I own nothing!J.K. Rowling owns it all...except for my idea...that is mine! Haha. If you would be so kind as to R&R it would be greatly appreciated! ENJOY!!

Chapter 6

Severus sat at a table in the Boars Head reading a book and waiting for a couple of his idiot cousins. Snape looked up from his carefully concealed book and looked to see if the idiots were there yet. And of course, they weren't. Imbeciles can't even arrive some place on time! Snape thought. He flipped over his to book to reach for his drink and a title in bright colors was revealed. Strange Potions for the Common Wizarding Idiot! it read. Snape was turned to the chapter headed Singing Potions and it read:

Well, Common Wizarding Idiot, not much is known about these mysterious singing potions because there have not been many incidents with them. In fact, there are only there known cases in the world (see page 4562 for firsthand accounts). When interviewed, the three victims all said they had to wait for it to wear off, which at a minimum took two years!

So, Idiot, if someone has tricked you with a singing potion you have no choice but to wait for it to wear off. Though you could go ahead and call us and be the next reported victim!

Snape sat grumbling. He had wasted his money on this book for nothing! After that all it had was hand written lyrics to Baby Got Back by Sir-Mix-A-Lot in strangely familiar hand writing and a paw print at the end.

Just then the door banged open and what looked like two inbred hillbillies walked in. Snape tried to remember why he had asked these two for help. Oh yes that's right, he thought, everyone else was too busy!

Snape growled as the two came crashing over to his table then winced as they landed in a chair each. "Hey cuz!" One exclaimed.

Snape grimaced. "Hello One. Hello Two." He sang. He had never referred to them by their actual names instead calling them One and Two as in Idiot One and Idiot Two. Neither of them were had figured this out so he continued with it. And thankfully they were both only squibs and kept around from heavy lifting

"Cuz! What up with ya voice? It sounded like ya was sunging us a song!" Two exclaimed then began to roar with laughter along with One.

Snape growled then snatched up some parchment and a quill he had kept off to the side and wrote: SHUT UP YOU IMBECILES! and shoved it at them. The dirty men gradually became quiet. Snape sat back with a musical hmph and glared. Once he was certain they'd be quiet he pick up his quill and wrote Now, the reason I sent a message to you was because I need you to…ah…do some heavy lifting for me. And thrust it in front of their faces. "Alright cuz. Whatever you need." One replied. Two nodded his head.

Snape snatched the parchment back and began describing his plan to them in very small words.

***

Snape say in his normal spot at the professor's table and waited for dinner to begin. It would most definitely be a night to remember.

He had managed to convince Dumbledore to let them help the house elves in the kitchen claiming that they were desperate for work, any kind of work, and that it would only be temporary until they could get back home to Ireland.

That had been the easy part. Now he just hoped the two inbred idiots wouldn't blow it.

He had instructed the two men to figure out which pitcher the three brats would be using and dump his potion into it. Once they drank it everyone would get a pleasant surprise. Now all he had to do was wait…

Snape sat back and observed the offensive Gryffindors that had put him in his present predicament and struggled to stop his maniacal laugh before anyone actually heard it (and of course it would sound like the laughter of a villain in an opera). If they wanted to play the positions game he'd play it and he wasn't going to play nice either!

Just then the food appeared and Snape had trouble containing his excitement. He didn't bother with getting food for himself. He simply watched as they poured drinks for themselves but growled when they put them down without taking a drink. Who in the world didn't get a drink first!?

"Psst! Hey cuz!" Snape heard the no so quiet whisper. He whirled in his chair to see One and Two at the bottom of the platform close to the door. Snape glared at the pair and searched his robes until he produced a quill and parchment. WHAT are you two doing here?!

"Well cuz, we came up her to see what that there liquid would do!"

Snape palm slapped his forehead. Why did he have to pick the stupidest people in his family to help him? He heard everyone gasp and a few girls scream and looked up. He saw that the three people responsible had suddenly formed the heads of spoons. And that was wrong! All wrong!

"Oh yea…we also wanted to know what would a happen if we added sum thangs to yur potion. Ya see, cuz, it didn't smell to appertizin' so we added a few spices to make it smell gud."

Snape turned and glared at them then thought for a moment then turned back to the scene and watched as the children gradually began to look more and more like spoons. Well…revenge was revenge, it didn't really matter what form it came in as long as it was satisfying and this most definitely was!

Snape jumped up with a maniacal gleam in his eye and his chair screeched across the floor and what came out of his mouth was astonishing! "AAH HAA!! NOOW YOU'LL SEE WHAT I'VE GOONE THROUGH!!" sung like the fat Viking woman at the end of the opera.

Everyone turned to stare. No one had really paid attention to the words just to the fact that he was singing very high soprano. The three students had by now finished their transformation and were half their original size and were silver spoons with glaring eyes and mouths full of razor sharp teeth. The trio of spoons looked at each other and then at Snape who was too busy sing/laughing maniacally to notice their transformation. They looked at each other one last time and zoomed over toward Snape (didn't I mention that they were floating spoons?).

Snape stopped his laughter for a moment and notice the killer spoons coming dangerously close to him and squealed then took off running through the dining hall with his cousins and the spoons close on his heels. They ran (or floated) out of the dining hall and through the corridors. At one point they came to a spot in the halls that split three different ways and they all took a different way with a ferocious spoon to follow. Snape had taken the one to the left, being almost certain that it would take him to his dungeon but quickly found out he was wrong when he came to a dead end. He turned around and came face to…uh…face with a spoon. It had him cornered.

Snape backed up until he hit the wall. The spoon had him trapped. He gulped and then began to beg the spoon to not eat him. "Please oh please evil spoon! Don't devour me! I don't want to die! Not like this!!!" Snape sank to the floor and awaited then end.

Snape sat cowering and listened to the spoon growl, then out of nowhere came laughter from the shadows. "Alright, my dear, that's quite enough. We seem to have poor Severus scared out of his wits." Snape looked up to see Dumbledore come out of the shadows and with a flick of his wrist turn the spoon back into a student. The girl who had started this whole mess.

Snape jumped up and glared at the pair. "You think this was funny!" He exclaimed without even realizing that he wasn't singing.

Dumbledore chuckled. "Well, Severus seems the singing potion was scared right out of you. And yes it was quite amusing. I knew what you were up to with your cousins so I put a little twist of my own in there. The students knew exactly what would happen. I figured it wouldn't hurt to force some emotion out of you even if it was for your own life." And then Dumbledore began to laugh again and left with the offensive student.

Snape stood there for a moment and simmered. How could the headmaster do such a childish thing! Snape growled and decided to forget about it until he had the three students in class, then he would give them hell and let them know if they told anyone about anything he would torture them. He laughed and walked back towards his dungeon glad that the whole experience was over with.

I hope you've enjoyed this final chapter of Snapes adventures and I'm sorry if it disappointed you! Please review!! I enjoy knowing what my readers think even if it is negative...Also, a little advertising, keep a look out for my other fanfics coming out. I plan on another one similar to Snape's but with McGonagall (hehe) and I also plan on a twilight/harry potter crossover and possibly a Phantom of the Opera! So keep a look out and thank you so much for reading my fanfiction!!!