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Dear readers,

Apparently my reference in the last chapter was not entirely easy to pick up on. That line "Don't do anything reckless or stupid" was what Edward said to Bella when he left her in the forest. So, when Jacob unknowingly says the exact same line…you got it? Good. Just wanted to clarify.

Again, thanks for keeping up with me and reviewing! I enjoy reading everyone's excited comments, no matter how short! I'm hoping for maybe five more chapters, I think. I don't want to drag it out forever because I want to make sure it gets finished, unlike one of my previous fics.

Oh, and I just realized that I made a mistake. Obviously, Jacob doesn't give Bella her bracelet until Eclipse and Edward doesn't give her the diamond until after that. Sorry. Let's just act under the assumption that Bella received her bracelet at an earlier time.

And I changed my mistake about Aro's power. It wasn't intentional. I do know what I'm talking about. Thanks for catching that to those of you who messaged me about it!

Sincerely,

Rusty Myers

PS-For future reference, remember that vampire minds can focus on many things at once, according to Edward.

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~Chapter Eight~

It was rather embarrassing not being able to hunt my own food. It was degrading, this complete lack of focus. On the way home, Jacob changed form and caught a large deer for me. I was thankful to him, but it was still very humiliating being a vampire having to be fed by someone else. The sooner the Cullens left, the better.

We arrived back at the house late into the night. Emmett and Edward were lounged on the couch, engrossed in some sports game. Esme and Carlisle were engaged in a game of chess. I didn't sense anyone else around, so I assumed the others must be out hunting.

I went straight upstairs and to my bedroom. I knew Edward would be curious, but I simply couldn't deal with him right now. It was times like these that I wished I could lay down and take a nap just to pass the time. It was quite bothersome having to occupy myself 24 hours a day. And when I didn't, all that time was left up to my thoughts, something I did not want at present.

The others seemed to sense I did not want to discuss my absence for the time being. Even Alice remained downstairs with Edward when she returned. I stood for a very long time at the entrance to my room. I hadn't even gone inside. My thoughts were racing so fast it was almost hard to keep up with them.

Finally I moved over to my bed and sat down. I closed my eyes, the closest way I had to sleep, and tried to block out the sounds from downstairs. Emmett had discovered Jacob's Wii and along with Edward, Alice, and Jacob, had begun a very loud game of Mario Kart.

The sooner I get them out of here, the better. I'm running out of time to figure out what the Volturi are up to. And I can't focus on that and trying to keep the Cullens safe. This is big. It deserves my whole attention. Maybe I could even send Jacob back with…No. I couldn't do that. As much as I wished I could-Jacob would be much safer away from me-I was simply incapable of living without him.

It was wrong of me to keep him around, I've always known that. He deserves a normal life. He should've been allowed to marry some Quileute girl and raise a family, go cliff diving with Quil and Embry, go fishing with Billy, and just be happy. I know Jacob still feels for me and I think he hopes that someday I'll change my mind.

Maybe I should just give into him. He's been so good to me all these years; he deserved something for his efforts. But would that be enough for him? Would he know the difference? And now that Edward-

"NO!!!" I cried suddenly.

How did he even worked his way into my thoughts? There was nothing between me and Edward and there hadn't been for ten years. Just because he suddenly walked back into my life after all that time doesn't mean a thing!

"Are you alright, Bella dear?"

It wasn't the voice I expected to hear, for which I was very thankful. I quickly composed my expression and managed to find a smile.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

Esme smiled warmly and came over to sit next to me on the bed. She didn't make any effort to hug me or comfort me, probably remembering my hesitation last time. She just sat down and looked around the room, taking it all in.

"You've got a very nice home here, Bella," she remarked warmly.

Home, I scoffed inwardly. More like a prison.

"Thank you," I said instead. "I seem to have a lot of spare time for decorating these days."

"Emmett, Jasper and Alice are going out tomorrow to check the trail," she explained, changing the subject quite suddenly. "If there's no sign of Victoria, we'll be out of your way very soon."

"Esme, where will you go?"

"We've spent the last few years just outside of Montreal."

They had left Forks then. Of course they had. After ten years someone would've noticed that they hadn't aged a day.

Esme forwent her previous hesitation and placed a hand on top of mine. "Charlie's fine, Bella dear. He's made his peace with the situation. He's even got someone in his life now, though I don't suspect that maturing anytime in the near future."

She smiled softly to me.

"How do you know that?" I inquired quizzically. "Do you visit Forks?"

Esme's smile fell slightly. She hadn't realized what her words would give away.

"Esme?" I persisted.

"Edward….goes back."

"What?" I gasped incredulously.

"Every now and then, he just leaves without a word. He checks in on Charlie and the Quileutes. He stays for a few days. Even Alice hasn't dared to ask him what he does down there, but we can all guess. I'm sure you can too."

I didn't respond. My mind flooded with images that I didn't want to see. Edward, standing in my empty bedroom, looking through my left belongings that I'm sure Charlie hadn't moved; Edward walking through the empty hallways of Forks High, looking at the pictures of the graduated classes, pictures that I wasn't in; Edward laying in the meadow, our meadow.

"I'm sorry," Esme said after my prolonged silence. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"You didn't," I lied quickly, hardening my expression. "I was just thinking of Charlie. It's good to know he's doing alright. I've often considered going to visit him myself, but I'm not sure he would understand."

"I'm sure he would love to see you, Bella dear. But whatever you decide, you mustn't blame yourself for his situation. You made your choice to protect those you loved." I noticed the past tense she used. "Because of you, Charlie is safe from Victoria. We are what we are. It's our present actions that show who we are, not our physical appearance."

"Thanks Esme," I said with a smile. "You've always been just like another mother to me."

"There was a time when I thought you would be another daughter to me," she said simply.

I gaped. I couldn't believe she spoke so bluntly. But her voice was loving and not at all accusatory. She continued to smile at me a moment longer before getting up to leave, pausing in the doorway.

"Thank you again, Bella, for all that you've done for us. I understand how hard this is for you. I hope that you've found happiness here in Italy."

Her words still hung in the air long after she'd departed. Happiness? Was I happy? I had Jacob, but was that enough? I had peace of mind, knowing I'd saved those I used to love. Was that enough either? I had a nice home, a calling, acquaintances-I could hardly call Jane a friend-safety, Jacob. But was any of that enough? Was any of this what I truly wanted?

Alice, Jasper, and Emmett left the following morning. Rosalie sulked around the house for a few hours, angry that Edward didn't go instead of Emmett. Carlisle had insisted Edward stay here, since he was Victoria's prime target.

I had made up my mind. The Cullens would be leaving soon anyway, so it didn't matter. I needed a way to test my power and the less witnesses around, the better. If I was going to find out what the Volturi were up to, I was going to need more than a mere protective mind bubble. The situation worked out perfectly. Rosalie was in the living room painting and filing her nails and Edward, who had been avoiding me since I'd returned from Voltera, was reading on the couch. I took my place in the kitchen, out of eyesight but close enough to hear clearly.

Edward chuckled to himself. "Red always goes better with your complexion."

Roselie scowled. "Just because you're bored doesn't mean you can go through my thoughts to entertain yourself!"

"You know I can only focus on what you're thinking of right now," he teased. "I'm just trying to be helpful. Emmett likes the red better too."

I ignored the rest of their conversation and began focusing on my power. I could feel it, like a film shrouding me, protecting me. I focused on pushing it away, pushing it towards Edward. I imagined it surrounding him, blocking his mind, keeping his power inside his head. I suddenly felt very open and unprotected.

At that exact moment Jacob walked into the kitchen and I faltered. My concentration broke. I collapsed against the countertop. Jacob couldn't know. If he realized what I was doing his mind would be flooded with thoughts that Edward could see. I righted myself suddenly so that Jacob hadn't even noticed my moment of exhaustion.

"Hey," he said nonchalantly, continuing on into the living room where he turned on the television.

Had it worked? Had I been able to stop Edward's power for those few seconds? I couldn't just ask him. And Edward was so composed, there's no way I'd be able to sense anything by looking at him. I'd have to try again. But not now. If it did work, he'd be wary, suspicious. I'd have to wait.