My Heart
Disclaimer/Warning: D Gray-Man does not belong to me. It belongs to Hoshino Katsura-sensei, and it shouldn't be any other way. I don't claim to own any of the characters, places, or names stated in this fan fiction. ((I just like making the characters do crazy stuff.^_^))
Yullen Week!!
This Yullen week will be for Kanda's Birthday! Starting June 1st and lasting until Kanda's Birthday on June 6th! For more information check in regularly to the Yullen Pride Forums~
http://www. fanfiction. net/topic/49938/12142336/1/
Or, you can PM Blood Soaked Redemption
http://www. fanfiction. net/u/1654070/Blood_Soaked_Redemption
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Chapter Twenty: Worries
It was a full week after the Fourteenth disappeared that Allen found herself being outfitted for a private wedding in a small town in Southern France. Komui had arranged it so that Kanda and Allen were sent on a "mission" to Southern France together, Cross, Tiedoll, and Komui himself as escorts.
Komui never fully explained what excuse had been bought for such a large group of so many important persons to go so unprotected so far from Headquarters, but Allen trusted Komui. For the most part.
"Is that too tight, madame?" the woman attending Allen asked softly, her French accent soft and strong. Allen shook her head silently.
"Okay, good." The soft voice was somewhat soothing, but at the same time very, very disturbing. Something about her was not right, Allen decided. Allen found an itching urge to-
"Idiot apprentice, what the hell are you doing?" Cross asked lazily, with some irritation, from the door.
"Getting dressed, stupid Master, in case you couldn't tell." Allen snapped, not even bothering to glare at her master.
"Getting quite a tongue there, eh? S'pose that comes from dealing with your uptight boyfriend. Really, he doesn't know how to take a joke." Cross quipped, sounding far too innocent for Allen's liking. The British girl groaned in disgust.
"Hello, mademoiselle. Would you like to share some fine wine with me in another room?" Cross asked, directing his attention to the dark-haired woman fastening the remaining straps on Allen's kimono, which Kanda had insisted on, though Allen wasn't quite sure what was so wrong with her normal, every-day clothes, since the ceremony wasn't going to be fanciful.
"I have many different kinds with me, and can get more, if you would like...." Cross offered, when the woman said nothing. She turned to him and flashed her hand, displaying a wedding ring.
"I do not speak your kind of English, monsieur." she huffed. Cross shrugged and then sauntered away down the hall, no-doubt intent on pissing Kanda off.
"Really...What a man." The French woman said, not without a great deal of disgust. Allen laughed humorlessly.
"You haven't a clue."
"Well, you. I'm glad you didn't paint her from head to toe in white, at least, as your tradition would have it." Cross said as brightly as this particular General could. Kanda's eye twitched upon hearing the man's voice, and twitched again at the end of the comment.
"That would have been lying to your gods, and they doubtless would have struck you down on the spot." Cross finished, taking a delicate sip from his wine glass. Kanda's hand spasmed as it reached for his sword. Remembering that Komui had removed it on the insistence that they were in a law-abiding facility, Kanda sneered. His eye twitched again, but he said nothing.
Cross pouted at the lack of reaction.
"But I noticed that she isn't wearing any white at all. If you don't count her hair."
Still nothing.
"Does this fit right, monsieur?" Kanda's attendee asked, a slight tremor of nervousness in his voice. Kanda nodded tersely.
"It's fine."
"Oui, monsieur. I am done."
"Che, go away, then."
"You, you're such a touchy person. It's a wonder my idiot apprentice even wants you."
"For Kami-sama's sake, say it right! Or don't. Say. It. At. All." Kanda bit out, glaring directly up at Cross, who looked somewhat smug. Kanda's eye twitched.
"Kami-sama? Since when did you believe in Him?" Cross asked peevishly. Kanda's body gave a visible shake as the Japanese man walked past.
"You are a disgrace to Humanity." Kanda hissed.
"What do you know abou-"
"Shut the hell up! One more word out of you-!!"
"Kanda?" Komui called curiously, seeing Kanda threatening his General with a metal vase.
"What...are you doing?" Kanda noticed the vase in his hand, dropped it, and stormed off.
"What are you doing, General Cross?"
There were a few moments of silence as Cross light a cigarette.
"Just testing the boy...." he replied innocently.
It was impossible for Allen to it still for the last five minutes before the "ceremony", though there wasn't much of one. The priest, Cross, Tiedoll, Kanda, Komui, and Allen herself would be present and that was the extent of the participants. There would be no buffet, no after-ceremony celebration, as far as Allen knew, the whole process wouldn't even take anywhere near as long as getting dressed up. It was a little odd, but Allen wouldn't complain. She was with her love and that was all that mattered.
"Idiot apprentice, are you done staring at the floor? Can we get on with this?" Cross asked lazily from the door, appearing unwanted yet again.
"Yes, master. I am ready." Allen said quietly, sudden apprehension building up in her heart. Her hands shook as she seated herself in the wheelchair, and not just from her fatigue.
"At least you're clean for once." Cross sniffed, wrapping his elegant hands around the handles on the wheelchair. Allen ignored that comment and watched her hands quietly.
"Ignoring me again?" Cross asked, arching an eyebrow. The red-haired man's mouth twitched down in an almost unnoticeable frown.
"You sure you want to do this?" he mumbled, the one visible eye staring blankly to the side as he pushed Allen along.
"What?"
"You heard me, brat."
"Wh-why wouldn't I be sure about this? That's stupid, master."
The General rolled his visible eye.
"Making such a commitment even though you won't be you for very much longer."
Allen clenched her jaw, biting back the harsh retort she longed to lash out with.
"I am just choosing to live my life to its fullest. You do the same thing, Master, what with your drinking and womanizing." Allen countered, refusing to allow any thoughts of the Fourteenth slip to the front of her mind. Cross was silent, conceding the point.
Kanda stood patiently before Komui and the priest, eyes closed, listening for Allen and Cross' approach. Kanda and Allen hadn't been permitted to see each other, at both Komui's and Tiedoll's insistence, and so were kept in two separate buildings. Nervous whispers brushed against Kanda's heart, but sheer confidence -and perhaps even pleasure- kept those at bay. He wanted this, had wanted it for the longest time, but hadn't been able to put words to the desire.
But that wish was coming true in just a few minutes.
Those whisperings evolved into nervous hammerings against his barrier of confidence, chipping away at his defense. One thought slipped through:
How long would this last?
The pressure increased and Kanda felt his heart-rate spiking. He squashed those thoughts and took a deep breath.
Kanda's ears opened to the sound of Tiedoll's ramblings, which he had been successful in ignoring...up until now.
"My little Yuu-kun is all grown up! He is getting married! Where did the time go?! My dear little Yuu-kun, don't grow up too fast! It seems like it was only yesterday that you came to me, waving your sword and threatening me-!"
"That was yesterday, old man." Kanda sighed.
"Ohoho! I mean when you were about this tall!" Tiedoll said through his tears, grinning happily like a fool as he indicated his knee.
"Old man, I came to you when I was ten years old. I was never that small around you." the Japanese man said irately. Tiedoll blubbered a little bit more, but stopped when they heard the door open. Kanda whipped around, eyes searching for Allen in her wheelchair. What met his eyes was a slight shock.
Allen was in the kimono that Kanda had that requested she wear, but that wasn't the point.
She was standing.
Admittedly, with help from Cross, who had offered his arm with a expression of slight disgust, but she was standing on her own, when she hadn't been able to stand at all for the past couple of weeks. Kanda swallowed and hurried to her side to try to help. When he got close enough, Cross thumped him on the forehead patronizingly. Kanda froze and looked up at Cross in shock.
"What the fuck??" he demanded, unable to get angry for the sheer surprise of it.
"Get back over there, you, and wait. I'll bring her to you." Cross said impatiently. Kanda twitched, but went back to his place in front of Komui.
Cross and Allen made their way over to Kanda, who watched Allen intently, ready to jump to help her at any moment.
"Stop that," she said quietly when she was exchanged to Kanda's arm, "I'm not going to disappear or explode or something."
"I was more afraid of you tripping over yourself." Kanda retorted, smirking at her indignant expression.
"Shut up, Yuu Kanda." Allen threatened, attaching herself to his arm and pressing her weight against him. Kanda stood firm against the weight, slight as it was, and held Allen close.
The 'ceremony' was brief. The priest made Kanda swear, on his life, to protect and love Allen for as long as he lived, and vice versa for Allen. After that, Komui produced a marriage certificate for Allen and Kanda both to sign, after reading over it, of course. When they did, Komui handed the certificate over to Cross and Tiedoll, who signed it as witnesses to the act.
This done, Kanda, ignoring the presence of the four adults in the room, touched his fingers to Allen's cheek and pressed his lips against Allen's softly, "sealing the deal", so to speak. The others in the room looked away, a little shocked at the bold display.
"I now....pronounce you man......and wife?" the priest said with confusion and hesitance. Cross chuckled darkly and walked outside to smoke a cigarette. When Kanda released Allen, Allen was blushing generously and the priest was slightly displeased.
"Such displays! Such obvious disrespect of the Christian religion! And them working for the Pope himself!" the old man mumbled unhappily as he left the main room. Allen looked a little perturbed at the man's mention of their occupation, but Komui smiled soothingly and explained.
"I told him that you were only missionaries of the Pope, nothing more." Nevertheless, Allen didn't relax.
"There's no way he would tell anyone?" she questioned.
Komui shook his head and headed to leave the room as well.
"We leave for home in an hour and a half. Be ready by then!" Komui sang as he walked out. Kanda sneered at him, his arm still around Allen's waist, rather possessively.
"My little Yuu-kun...." Tiedoll mumbled, wandering off, following Komui, a white-ish handkerchief in his hand. After a moment of silence, Kanda suddenly felt Allen slump in his grasp. He panicked and looked down at Allen. The British girl looked up at him and smiled somewhat sheepishly.
"Sorry, I got tired."
"Che. Whiner." Kanda said roughly as he reached down and picked her up, one arm behind her knees and the other behind her back. Allen's eyes grew alarmed, but then she relaxed as Kanda carried her over to one of the pews. The Japanese man carefully set her down and then sat next to her, attaching his rough hands to her soft ones. He gently touched his forehead to hers and was startled to feel that she was running a fever.
He shot back and felt her forehead with the back of his hand. He could feel the sweat at her temples from the exertion of standing and could see the erratic pulse at the hollow of her throat.
"Daijobu??" he demanded, in his obvious stress slipping into the less-than-habitual Japanese.
"What? Oh. Yeah, I'm fine." Allen said lazily, swatting at Kanda's hands in dismissal. She entangled her fingers with his, tilting her head as she looked up at him. Kanda didn't look into her eyes, but instead held a somewhat distant look. He didn't stay like that for long before something flashed in his eyes -that same look that kept appearing, first in the Medical wing when Allen woke up a week previous, and many times after- and he looked away. Allen frowned, but said nothing.
She had tried to bring it up before, why he wouldn't look her in the eyes, or even look at her for very long, but Kanda had refused to say anything. At one time, he had even yelled at her, still not looking directly at her as he did. It hurt, but Allen said nothing.
She didn't entirely understand, but she knew Kanda still loved her. She could feel it in his words as he spoke to her late at night, whispering gently in her ear; could feel it in his touch when he felt her stomach for their child and when he touched her skin in a lover's caress. Nevertheless, it worried her.
Kanda carefully rested his forehead on hers again, breathing slowly, making very soft, almost unnoticeable noises in his chest. Like the distant rumble of a storm that ones ears could barely pick up. Allen supposed that it had something to do with his anatomy, his lungs or something, but preferred to think of it as a sign of deep contentment, much like a cat's purring. It was soothing, much like his presence in general, or his touch as she woke up every morning.
Morning....
Allen sighed deeply.
Most mornings, Allen woke up to see Kanda's dark, confused, hurt, quizzical eyes on her face, but with that odd distant look. He wouldn't seem to notice her gaze until she spoke, which she usually did fairly quickly upon noticing that odd expression in his eyes.
She didn't like it.
It did not bode well with the British girl.
Oooo....This actually made me kinda sad as I wrote this.
Well....Next chapter....Their going back to Dark Order HQ....
Sorry it took so long! I had meant to have it out over the weekend, however, I got caught up in a plot that diverted me from all computer contact.
Review, please.
-Maze Puppet