Lister stared around the engine rooms and sighed, all of their attempts to repair Starbug's thrusters had failed, and even now he couldn't really piece together what had happened, all he knew was that after Rimmer and Paige had retired Kryten, Cat and himself had been bored and decided to take Starbug out for a spin around the nearest moon to kill a few hours, Cat wanted to practise his parallel parking and Lister recalled wanting to see how many spins he could achieve in one skid whilst bouncing around the orbit he wanted to top his high score of seven!
Somewhere between both those ideas they had woken up on the dashboard dazed and confused, Kryten's best thought was that they might have hit a rogue asteroid and been sucked into the gravitational pull of the moon they had been circling, yet Starbug had no damage besides the thrusters and even that was due to a shaky landing that none of them could remember making.
Long story short they had destroyed their thrusters, therefore they couldn't take off, and worst of all their radar had picked up life forms upon the moon and they had no weapons to speak of besides Lister's socks.
Dragging his feet along the floor Lister made his way back up to the cockpit and collapsed into his chair, he lay there for a while staring out into the darkness and hoping Kryten would hurry back, the mech had taken it upon himself to leave the Bug and go locate the life signs to find out if they were a threat to them or could help them, in Kryten's opinion he was disposable and worst comes to worse a lot easier to repair than Lister or the Cat. After a heated argument Lister let him go but didn't feel comfortable about it, he didn't Kryten as some repairable toy, he was a friend, he thought of his life as important as anyone else's on board but there is no arguing with wired in software.
Cat was sitting quietly in the corner staring out of the window and shivering, Lister was worried about him – he knew Cat didn't like being closed in a place with no exits, Lister was slightly annoyed he had to stay firm but it wasn't as if Starbug wasn't big enough to move around in and feel comfortable, as for the Cat he wasn't claustrophobic as such he was just a stubborn individual who hated being told what to do and hated not being able to slink out of the door when he chose to, yet they were under strict orders not to leave the Bug so together they sat waiting for any word from Kryten. It had been 26 hours now and it felt eerily familiar to Lister.
"Aye, Cat do you remember when I was marooned for days with Rimmer? You and Kryten had to come and find us. That was a bloody nightmare I can tell you. Least we are together on this one hey?"
Cat just stared at Lister he smiled briefly and continued to sulk quietly, nothing was going to cheer him up today when he thought of all his suits he had planned on dying with and here he was stuck alone with a monkey.
Lister knocked his head against his chair a few times and stared at the ceiling, he would never say it aloud but he wished he were stuck with Rimmer now instead of the Cat, oblivious to cold and hunger Rimmer had devoted the days spent stuck with Lister to keeping him sane, at least Rimmer spoke to Lister and kept him awake, Cat seemed to be furious that he was in this situation and refused to co-operate in anyway. It didn't really surprise Lister as the Cat on the whole was a hugely selfish creature but Lister didn't know how to make Cat or himself loosen up and feel better.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Paige jumped down from Blue Midget with a thud and took her first glance of the moon, 'Bloodyhell' she whispered under her breath. It was cold, dark and miserable and they were its redeeming features, "Rimmer hurry up" she called impatiently towards the door, "We need to find them fast"
"I'm coming" Rimmer growled, still slightly angry at being pulled out of bed, out of her arms and now being sent on a hell bent mission to find three idiots, "I don't see why we should rush just because those idiots decided to go on a joyride" Paige watched his features drop as he finally looked around the moon. Panic flooded his eyes and worry etched every line on his face. "Paige, this place does not look good."
"It will be okay Arn" she smiled squeezing his hand, "You can't die, I am near impossible to kill and we have guns and sticks and food. I just pray the others have the same"
"Paige I don't like this, I want you to stay on Blue Midget! What if there are things out here that want to eat you?"
"Rimmer – I am not leaving them and as much as I respect you I am not a member of the Jupiter Mining Corporation so I don't have to listen to your orders" Paige turned to hug him, "Just think, we can find them, you will be a hero and we can go home. It is as simple as that. Plus lets face it you would curl up in fear alone out there"
Rimmer pulled a sarcastic face and squeezed her hand, after a few minutes he nodded, inside he was still uncertain and felt very much on edge as they set off cautiously checking their scanners every few minutes for any sign of life.
"Lister?" Paige cried into the gloom, Rimmer winced and pulled her behind him.
"Shush" he almost shouted at her, "What if something else hears you?"
Paige rolled her eyes and shrugged him off, Rimmer glared at her and turned back in the direction she shouted, silence. "Right" he looked about wildly, "Just .. lets not shout okay? We can just continue nice and quietly, find Lister, kill Lister and make it home in time for dinner"
Paige squeezed his hand affectionately again and walked alongside him as they made their way around the rocks looking for any sign that Starbug had been here, the terrain was sporadic one minute it was boggy and they sank into it, the next it was rock solid and steep, after over half an hour of them trodding along half pulling each other and catching each other when they tripped they stopped and looked around in despair.
"This isn't right" Rimmer frowned, "We should have found something by now. A sign of them, a sign of Starbug, a sign of some sort of lifeform? Something"
"Rimmer" Paige whispered.
"I mean honestly, I am sure we have passed this rock twice already. I have a feeling we are just going in circles"
"Rimmer" Paige pulled on his sleeve to get him to face the way she was facing.
"What Paige?" he half shouted spinning to face her, he heard a grunt to his left and slowly turned to see what had caused Paige's face to turn that ghastly shade of white.
Rimmer gulped, "Bugs?" he whispered holding Paige's hand tighter. "Have they seen us?"
"I..I don't think so" Paige stammered as they slowly lowered to the ground, crawling on their fronts they curled tightly behind a rock and watched them.
The nest of bugs swarmed from under the ground each as big as a car yet with the mental capacity of a cockroach, which wasn't exactly ironic since they couldnt have been fat distant cousins. Rimmer watched them circulate around as if they were searching for something, he could spot the workers from the warriors. The smaller less dangerous looking ones seemed to taste the ground; every so often one stopped and put its head against the surface as if it was listening for something. The warriors of the clan stood aside and waited, huge and intimidating they looked fearsome, equipped with large sharp spikes in place of what humans would use for arms, Rimmer watched in horror as a few of them got bored and mutilated one of the workers for fun.
Turning back to Paige he bit his lip and closed his eyes, there were just too many of them, "Okay, they are between us and Blue Midget. They seem to be looking for something, do you think they know we are here?"
"Insects." Paige closed her eyes and thought hard, "They live underground and wait for vibrations to bring them to the surface, StarBug landing, Blue Midget landing .. Even our footsteps along the floor will have woken them and alerted them to our presence. I think we should sit tight until they move off"
"Yet if we move they will hear us?" Rimmer half cried, Paige winced as he grabbed at his chest and wheezed. Jumping to action she held him and stroked his back. "We're finished!" he cried feeling his chest squeeze tighter and tighter.
"Shush. Breathe, just take a few minutes okay? Breathe. Its going to be okay. Look we sit and wait, see what they do if they go back down we sneak very very quietly back to the midget and try contacting the others again. Us being out here on foot is too dangerous"
Rimmer felt the pain in his chest relaxing as he lay against her and tried to calm himself. "I don't breathe but thanks anyway" he mumbled. "Sorry I am such a coward"
"Tut. Don't be silly, we all get scared. I am hardly relishing this idea" Paige smiled, kissing his forehead and peeking over the rock, as she looked up she screamed in alarm as she found herself face to face with a bug. Its shiny clear eyes scanned her over, its feelers reaching towards her face she tried to remain as still as possible.
"Get away from her" Rimmer cried cocking his gun and blowing the bugs head clean off.
Paige stood looking utterly disgusted with everything in life as bug brains splattered in her face. Rimmer jumped forward and wiped it from her face, pulling her back down he pulled her close and hugged her tightly.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"We are going to talk about that later … at length." Paige snarled picking some membrane from her hair, "As romantic and manly as that was I think we should move"
"Why?"
"Because every bug within 2 miles will have heard or felt that and surely be scuttling, slithering and clawing their way here right now"
"Fantastic" Rimmer groaned glaring at his gun.