Fear
He'd known it was a legitimate fear. It wasn't that Ryotaro was a weak person, but he'd known his limits, especially where she was concerned, and he feared what would happen when he went past them.
Kahoko coming to school, laughing with her friends. Kahoko wearing that dress, her feet bare, her legs going on forever as she played his Chopin song. Kahoko smiling at him, Kahoko brushing against him in the hall, Kahoko running through his mind. He'd known he wouldn't be able to hold back, he'd known his restraint wouldn't last forever, and he feared it, not knowing what she'd do.
He knew it would happen. He'd known that one day, his restraint would snap, and he'd just push her up against the wall and kiss her, ravaging her mouth for all he was worth.
And of course, it had.
Though...
If the way Kahoko was kissing him back was any indication, pulling him closer, winding her fingers through his hair...
He'd really had nothing to fear.